Hubby Deployed While im Pregnant with our First child.

Ashley - posted on 04/29/2009 ( 22 moms have responded )

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Hello, My Husband has ben deployed throughout my whole pregnancy. Its been hard but im being strong for him & our child.. im due in june & im praying he makes it home in time to meet his daughter. Hope you all are doing good.. is anyone else expierencing what im going through being a pregnant military wife..with a deployment & such.. id love to talk and get to know other pregnant military wives : )

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Jaclyn - posted on 05/13/2009

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Hi Ashley. My husband has just been attached to a unit from Alabama (we're in NJ)and will be leaving on the 31st to Iraq. We have 3 children and a business...and to add a little MORE stress to my situation..I'm scheduled for major surgery in June. Believe me, I know how terrible it is knowing that you're going through something so major. It's definately hard, but wahtever doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

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Sylvia - posted on 05/25/2009

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Hello!

I was pregnant majority of my husbands deployment, he was lucky enough (because the schedule changed) to be here for the birth of our daughter and in/out up until now. He will miss her first birthday party =( However, I understand how it can feel without him there. Unfortunately, it's one of the lows of having a military spouse. What you can do, is make sure you stay positive (despite him being gone), this is easier said than done, but your joy will help him celebrate this with you. If you can take as many maternity photos and ultrasound pictures, make your hubby a little flip book (snspfish.com) and send him emails about how you feel (good/bad). I did this and my husband felt like he was here experiencing the pregnancy with me. Also, it is very important to stay involved with groups like this for support and understanding. And also if you are involved with your local church, that is great support. If you have a Java Mom near you, I definitely recommend that. And lastly, your hospital should have mommy classes you can attend so you can say in a social network in person. This is very important (even after the baby comes)! Stay strong! Good Luck!

Amanda - posted on 05/18/2009

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my husband was also deployed and i was a pregnant military wife...he didn't get to see him till the baby was about 2 weeks old now hes back over ther and he will be missing out for the next 6 months....the only thing that is getting us through this is taking lots of pictures and video tapeing....that way he doesnt compleatly feel like hes missing out on everything

Sarah - posted on 05/14/2009

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I was lucky - it was our second child that he missed everything due to the Iraq deployment. He left in February, she was born in July, he got R&R in October, and then came home in May. We were just thankful he was home for her first birthday. Family support is really helpful, but so is knowing that someone else has gone through the same thing and made it. Just keep hanging in there, and take things one step at a time. Remember to take care of yourself, and that it's okay to cry when you need to.

Keri - posted on 05/14/2009

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That happened to me too. He was not supposed to deploy and they told him at the last minute that he had to go. I was 6 and a half months pregnant. It was devastating, especially because it was so unexpected. They were very supportive though and let him come home for 18 days when our son was born. My hospital was able to induce me right at 40 weeks so that my husband could spend as much time as possible with our newborn son before he had to go back. Good luck! Deployments are never easy when you're a pregnant military wife, but especially when you don't want your husband to miss anything.

[deleted account]

my husband was away at school, then deployed from 12 weeks pregnant until our oldest was about 6 months old.

he was also deployed from 2 weeks pregnant until about a month before our second was born.

i have a great group of friends here that are amazing - and i've found it's harder having him gone with the toddler, and not the infant, him being away for young infancy is a heck of a lot easier than older infancy/toddler ages.

Amber - posted on 05/11/2009

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I've been a pregnant military wife too! Just keep staying strong! Your daughter will grow up knowing daddy won't always be around. Part of military life. =) He'll just have to make every moment count when he is around. Keep up the good work.

Natasha - posted on 05/07/2009

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My husband left when I was five months pregnant, and came back when our daughter was five months old. I admire your strength because I know what it can take out of you. Keep your head up and your friends close. My best friend in CA was "daddy" throughout the entire delivery and there on, and those friendships are hard to find and priceless. Stay as active as you physically can, get out of the house and do something, ANYTHING! It all helps!

Ashley - posted on 05/06/2009

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thank you so much,im trying my best.. my family is always there for me,but can never truly relate to the military life so its difficult at times,that they dont understand how hard it really is..but ive been very strong so far,my husband still has 7months left in iraq,he will be home for rnr around the time shes suppost to be born,so atleast he will get to see her and hold & kiss her,but he wont be there for her first months,but im just guna do my best to webcam it with him every chance we get. im so greatful & love all the military wives out there, you all are so strong and i seriously look up to you all,im first time everything here,so i truly love you all and respect you & your advice. thanks!

Ashley - posted on 05/06/2009

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i totally get what your saying.. its so hard,but u gota be strong : ) im tryin my best,i do have my emotional break downs, but only 4more weeks until my lil one is here and my hubby goes on rnr too.. im excited!

Katherine - posted on 05/05/2009

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i was 3 months pregnant when my hubby went to iraq. the baby was three months old when he cam back. i know just what you are going through. if you wanna talk or need support or have questions on being a pregnant military wife let me know. its very hard what us military wives go through! be strong and make shore you have a big support system

Megg - posted on 05/03/2009

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Hi Ashley. My husband just got back from a 15-month deployment. Our son was born 4 months into deployment and he only got to see him on his R&R. I was so sad that my husband wasn't around to "grow" into parenting with me throughout my pregnancy, but that said, he's back now and has been such a wonderful Daddy and making up for the time away.

Amy - posted on 05/01/2009

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My husband was deployed throughout my pregnancy, the day after he came home I went to the hospital and was put on hospital bedrest and 12 days later our son was born. It was awful being alone, it's terrible being alone to begin with, but with all those hormones it's awful. I cried...a lot. Luckily he was home for 4 months and got to experience the first few months of our sons life. As military wives and mothers we really deserve a medal of honor for everything we go through! Stay strong, go shopping...that helped me, get excited about the baby, decorate her room completely, that really helped me...just be careful moving the furniture! I did it by myself...but I also delivered 10 weeks early, so be careful!

Traci - posted on 05/01/2009

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My husband deployed when I was 10wks along with our first back in 2003. My water broke early so he missed the birth and saw her at 2 weeks old during his R&R. He then returned when she was 6 months old. Defiantly hard to do alone but hopefully you have some support from family and friends.

Katie - posted on 04/30/2009

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We found out we were pregnant a week before he left for Afghanistan for six months. He got home in July and our son was born in August. It was def. hard being on my own, (it was our first deployment too) We got lucky and were able to web cam each other at least once a month. He always called right after all the important doctors appointments. Keeping busy with work, baby showers and shopping for cute little baby clothes kept me sane :) Take lots of pics of your belly to send to him. I used to send him cute emails saying little things about the babies growth that week, like "the baby grew fingernails this week" I think just keeping him involved as much as possible is important. Ask his opinion on the theme of the babies room, tell him to look at furniture online (if it's possible), that way he feels included too. Stay strong for him and your baby!

Shaina - posted on 04/29/2009

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Well my husbands in the Navy now stationed in Japan! He was deployed while i was pregnant with our first child> Try your best to stay calm first and for-most. This can be a very difficult time for you ans can also have affevts on the pregnancy itself> Stress is no stranger to the military wife but it is harmful more during pregnancy. Try to keep your time occupied. and remember if he dosnt keep in touch as much he is and will always be concerned with you and the babies decelopement and first and for-most if he had a choice he would be with you every step of the way! If your a prayer, keep praying for his safety and his speedy return to you!

Amber - posted on 04/29/2009

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my husband missed most of my first pregnancy and the birth. he didnt meet our son unti lhe was 2 weeks old and he had to leave again when he was 6 weeks old. i'm pregnant with our second atm and dh is deployed. he should make it home for this birth but he'll be going on another deployment shortly after. it can be very hard, especially with all the hormones and mood swings. you just gotta stay tough and think positive. if you ever need some one to talk to just send me a note. good luck!

Mackenziesmum - posted on 04/29/2009

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Hello, I can definitely relate to you! My husband deployed for a year when I think I was about three months pregnant. The week before he left I found out that I had gestational diabetes. I went to all my appointments alone, and sometimes it does get tough when you see the other husbands there!! I got through it just taking care of myself and the baby! My husband was meant to be home for the arrival of our little girl, but she decided to come early...luckily for me I had a friend come with me so I wasn't totally alone. Now my little girl is five months old and my husband is still gone. It's not the easiest thing to do, but you just take each as it comes...good luck with your pregnancy and I hope that your husband gets back in time!!

Tobia - posted on 04/29/2009

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My husband is a away at basic training til june and then he goes to A.I.T. until september. Since my son is due in July he will miss the birth of our first child and the first couple months of his life. Although I am not really happy about that I plan to make the most of it by sending him plenty of detailed letters and pictures to make sure he feels like he has been there for every moment that has taken place.

[deleted account]

My hubby is Navy and was in and out of port constantly when I was pregnant with my son. We didn't know if he would be home when I went into labor so my mom flew out for the last month of my pregnancy. Luckily the ship went underway for a month only 1 week before my due date and his command gave him TAD orders to a shore command during that time.
I'm preggers with #3 now. DH was gone for an 8 month deployment. Then home for about 2 1/2 months during which time he knocked me up. He left 2 months ago but we should be together again before I have the baby.

My hubby and I met while we were both in the Navy. We have been married for 7 years, and he has been in for 8. I got out after our son was born and they tried to deploy both of us at the same time.

Ashley - posted on 04/29/2009

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Awe! Yeah ive went to all my doctor visits alone sept maybe a few he was here for in the begining then he left. I have alot of family support & they all wanna be there when the time comes,so thats good! How long have you all been in the military for? : )

Allegra - posted on 04/29/2009

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my husband wasnt deployed but he was gone. i found out i was pregnant a week before he left for basic training so he was gone for 6 months so i had to go through most of my pregnancy alone. i was lucky that we were together when my son was born though. I went to all my apts and ultrasounds by myself. I do have a friend who's husband is deployed and will most likely miss the birth of their first child. Its hard on her as well but having a good support team helps. Good luck :)

Amanda - posted on 05/18/2009

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my husband was also deployed and i was a pregnant military wife...he didn't get to see him till the baby was about 2 weeks old now hes back over ther and he will be missing out for the next 6 months....the only thing that is getting us through this is taking lots of pictures and video tapeing....that way he doesnt compleatly feel like hes missing out on everything

Keri - posted on 05/14/2009

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That happened to me too. He was not supposed to deploy and they told him at the last minute that he had to go. I was 6 and a half months pregnant. It was devastating, especially because it was so unexpected. They were very supportive though and let him come home for 18 days when our son was born. My hospital was able to induce me right at 40 weeks so that my husband could spend as much time as possible with our newborn son before he had to go back. Good luck! Deployments are never easy when you're a pregnant military wife, but especially when you don't want your husband to miss anything.

Amber - posted on 05/11/2009

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I've been a pregnant military wife too! Just keep staying strong! Your daughter will grow up knowing daddy won't always be around. Part of military life. =) He'll just have to make every moment count when he is around. Keep up the good work.

Katherine - posted on 05/05/2009

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i was 3 months pregnant when my hubby went to iraq. the baby was three months old when he cam back. i know just what you are going through. if you wanna talk or need support or have questions on being a pregnant military wife let me know. its very hard what us military wives go through! be strong and make shore you have a big support system

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