Moving cross country with a 3yr old and 1 month old

Maida - posted on 01/18/2011

Hi Courtney! We're doing the opposite of you. Moving from New Mexico to Washington, DC. We're being given 6 days and we're taking all of those days. We have a 2 year old who is in the process of potty training and we plan to drive max 300 miles per day. We'll pre-book our hotels where my husband has points and we'll see something of the country along the way. We plan to drive, stop for meals and gas and just hope for the best when it comes to the boy's internal schedule (he usually does his thing after a meal so we're hoping that'll hold true during the trip as well). Like the others said below, plan as much as you can but be flexible, too. This is our first move with a child so, it'll be a challenge for sure. You can do it!

Denise - posted on 01/18/2011

Don't be afraid of the move! I did it with three while hubby was deployed. Four days in the car, WOW! But it can be done and done well. I would suggest that you get a movie player for the car, that works well in keeping the older one entertained. I would also suggest pumping and freezing breastmilk to help with the drive time. There are many refridgerators that you can purchase that work off the car's 12volt system that can keep it for the few days you are on the road.
ALSO, and this we have found to be the biggest help...we have moved 6 times in my 7 year-olds life..both driving and flying. Get started early! Every morning get out early. Then find a hotel around 4PM with a pool and let the older one play with hubby while you feed. This way he can get his energy out and fall asleep on time and you will all be the better for it. Even a play place, McDonalds is great for these, works. But spend at least an hour there. IF you don't eat the food at McD's, have dinner else where and ice cream there. If you don't get their energy out, you will pay when trying to put them down...then the mornings are evil too.
You will do fine!

Courtney - posted on 01/17/2011

If you can afford it I would definitely recommend you and the children flying there and your husband driving. I have an almost 3 year old daughter who just finished potty training and a month old daughter that I am still breast feeding. So I understand you frustration on this topic. We plan to drive from California (where we are now) to Illinois (where my family is) to visit before we move to Japan. So I am getting very very nervous about it. Though my husband brought up the other day that I could just fly with the kids to make it easier on me if I wanted. Good luck with the move!

Jackie - posted on 01/15/2011

some of our best memories are from cross country road trips, like everyone has said... you cant go too fast (drive too long without breaks) but as long as you keep your patience in check you will discover that there are a lot of things to see in all those towns you will be stopping in. There were a few times it was fustrating, we pcsed from new jersey to california when our dau was 5 months (i was nursing) and she was on an apnea monitor.

Rachelle - posted on 01/14/2011

lots of good ideas here....just breathe and do what the kids tell you they need at the time....plan for the worst and hope for the best and be forgiving of yourself and the situation. You WILL get there eventually. :) I've moved across country (Mass to Calif, then Calif to VA) with little ones AND cats. It's not easy and having a 1 month old bfing makes it a lot more unpredictable. Mine nursed on demand and each was a little different. If you can pump and you son will take a bottle without creating any problems for your nursing situation, that's ideal....but I know my boys NEVER willingly took a bottle. SO be prepared to just have to stop and let him fill his tank. As for the potty training thing....definitely get yourself a good travel potty. Even if you're not moving across country, you never know when you need to stop immediately. GOOD LUCK!

Mei - posted on 01/13/2011

I used a portable DVD player in the car and it helped me immensely. Also, I brought my portable toilet for my daughter and had her hlep me with feeding the baby. I pumped milk into bottles and had them ready for the baby. At every stop make sure to warm up several more bottles for the next hundred miles. It'll make life easier.

Melissa - posted on 01/10/2011

Hey! What part of NM? I have some friends stationed in Aluquerque. Anyway, our first station was in So Carolina. We had to drive from Texas to Utah to assist the movers. That 's where our stuff was stored. Then we had to drive to SC. At the time I had a 2 yr old being potty trained and I was 6 mos pregnant. Us girls had to make a lot of pit stops. A yr ago we moved again up to Boston with the 3 yr old and a 6 mo old, I just made myself a seat in the back between the girls and we would pull to the side of the road when baby needed to feed. as far as the potty issue, look into some camping gear. somewhere there is a collapsable potty chair that you can hook little baggies to, do your thing, then zip it up and dispose. That way you can go ANY TIME! Even if you are near a rest stop they're not always very clean, so this is also the more sanitary route. Good luck to you! We get to hit the skies this summer and land ourselves in Japan for 3 years. I would definitely prefer to be in your shoes, moving wise.

Kayla - posted on 01/10/2011

We just conquered a 2800 mile trip from houston tx to ft lewis wa....& omg it was horrible. Lol mainly bc we drove thru wyoming in the dark while snowing and rampaging 65 mph winds thru the WHOLE state! Than our car overheated when we hit Oregon,if it wasnt for the cool weather we wld hve broke dwn somewhere unexpected! We tried to stop every 2 hrs,usually at truck stops to stretch&eat. It was jst me,my husband&my 4 yr old. My son is potty trained but being in a car can be irritating for them so pull ups were his best friend along the way! Didn't hve a dvd player but he had his psp tht had games&movies. We bought snacks/drinks b4 we hit the road. I suggest sleeping while its dark&tkn advantage of the daylight hours. You definitely need rest. We went thru the tip top of NM&they had ridiculous 1 lane construction for a while. Fill up every time it hits half a tank! It will save you money! Have a safe trip,pray everything goes well!

Tonya - posted on 01/09/2011

We have always driven, whether it has been a pcs or a vacation. Kids are 16 and 13 now, but even when they were little, we drove. San Antonio, TX to So. OR when they were toddlers...we always travel with our pets too. If you can, buy a few new toys, they don't need to be pricey, just something new to hold attention. Crayola has some great markers that only color on special paper, GREAT for a car trip! If don't have one already and can afford it, buy a tv set up for over the seat back and a couple new movies. As for traveling with pets....make sure to keep a space for them and keep water and food available along with a leash for when you need to walk them. Like everyone else has said...pre book a hotel! You can use your gov card for it, it's covered in your moving, there's no reason not to! La Quinta has a great pet policy, they allow 2 pets with no extra charge and we have found that if you have more than that, if you call them, they generally have no problem with it if you check in advance. We pretty much stay with them exclusively because of this. Plus they pretty much all have a fairly good continental breakfast, some really nice depending on the hotel.

Stevie - posted on 01/09/2011

Definitely stop for diaper changes frequently. We have a 20 month old and drive from Fort Gordon, Georgia to Orlando, FL to see family when the husband has time off. It's only a 6 hour drive, but every time we change him, his diaper is totally soaked & leaks from being squished in the carseat, I guess. We try to stop every 2 hours. Definitely bring snacks for the toddler, most of the time he sleeps. I wouldn't drive the whole way in one shot, definitely try to divide it up, they get extremely restless after a certain amount of time being in the carseat, with breaks included, our son dreads going back in the carseat after a break. It's best to grab a hotel and start fresh the next morning, maybe especially early when they will be sleeping, if you aren't extremely tired yourself. Good luck & God bless. Stay safe out there!

Amanda - posted on 01/09/2011

Try the military one source website. They have all kinds of information on everything from a to z and it includes moving...LoL. Best thing: Don't stress! Plan as much as you can.....things like having proper snacks and whatnot for the kids, take a small cooler so they always have somthing to drink, an extra set of clothes for "accidents", all that is in your control. Being prepared will reduce your stress later. Don't be scared! I take road trips all the time....literally have been coast to coast and take at least three road trips a year (we are avid travelers). Get prepared but realized something probably won't go according to plan and just take it in stride. I hope you enjoy your new base!

Nicole - posted on 01/08/2011

I PCSed from west TX to FL with an 18 month old and a 6 week old and 2 cats. You can do it! Have a set driving plan for each day. Military allows a maximum of 10 hours a day on the road. Take advantage of that! Have snacks and drinks accessible for the toddler and listen for when they need a break. Feed the baby, make sure nobody else has to go potty and start driving again. If you have to stop for 30 minutes to and hour then you do. It's ok. Don't stress the small stuff or when the trip takes a few more hours. Take it day by day and everything will work out fine :) Good Luck!

Candi - posted on 01/07/2011

Our first move with Kids aged 1 and 2 was to Germany. We had to drive from SC to Atlanta (4 hrs) then it was a 9 1/2 hr flight. Not bad at all. Then we moved to TX. Flew from Germany to SC (again, alone) with a 5 and 4 yr old. and pregnant! Drove from SC to TX. 26 hours! We stopped once in each state and that was it! Moving from TX to VA was a little tougher. 3 kids (10, 9, and 4) a dog, a cat, and a turtle!! Broke down in Alabama, the only shop was BACK one hour in Mississippi! Had to spend the night there! It put us a day behind and added tons of stress! 3 tired kids, 3 aggrivated pets, and a van FULL of stuff. The every 2 hour deal will be a hassle I think. You can't always find a place to pull over. Put a pull up on your daughter in case of an accident. Kids tend to sleep more when they are in a car for some reason.(most of them) Once you get there you will realize you were stressing over nothing. Good Luck

Kasha - posted on 01/07/2011

I always use the 2hr rule with our kiddos...just to allow them to stretch their legs...use the bathroom, etc. I always remind my husband that cars seats are not as comfortable as regular seats because they cant move as much. But, I did keep driving if the kiddos were sleeping. I would also use pull-ups for the trip to relieve the stress of accidents...even completely potty trained kiddos tend to have them on long trips, partly because they are sleeping more. Other than that, we packed lots of snacks, and bought a DVD player for the kiddos(didnt have one at the time), and had lots of different toys to keep it new. The biggest stress reliever is to know where you will be staying when you get there if you dont have housing yet.

Andrea - posted on 01/07/2011

Are you guys moving with a UHAUL or having the military move you? We personally have moved ourselves twice. I had to drive by myself with a 2.5 yr old (who was already potty trained) and 4 dogs and 2 cats. It was a little stressful having to take the dogs to the bathroom without everyone escaping and such. I drove straight through 18.5 hrs and it was terrible. I would suggest just taking your time...preplan your trip, book hotels, and just enjoy the drive. I found when my daughter needed to go potty I did as well. I also had a portable potty in the car just in case. As a family we just traveled over 3,000 going to visit family and then taking a vacation, we had our daughter and the dogs. It was so nice to have prebooked hotels, so when we got to that spot we had to stop. Actually getting the rest we needed and not stressing about finding a hotel at one in the morning. Once when we were traveling back to visit family with our then 6 wk old daughter and of course the dogs, we were so tired and tried to stop at a hotel at 1am, and they would not give my husband a room because he was not 21, then we went to another hotel and they had already did their check or something and would not book anymore rooms. We were so mad that we just drove the rest of the way. The military reimburses alot of the expenses for the move, so plan for your comfort. When I travel alone I always prepack the car and test the comfort of everyone...the car is going to be where you spend alot of your time.