need opinions

Just Another - posted on 06/11/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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so this is kinda long but its really bugging me.
My daughter who is 6 has a friend who lives a few houses down.
The kids played a lot together & then it kinda stopped.
I called the mom on the phone & asked if there was something wrong.
She then began to tell me that she & her husband had been talking & felt like my child was being disrespectful to them.
I was surprised to hear of this since she had made no mention of it before & I have never been told this from any other parent, however, I was very open to hearing what my child was doing as kids are kids & mine isn't perfect.
When I asked her to give me examples of this, she had said :
1) that a few months prior when my daughter spent the night there, my daughter complained about how her bed was more comfy then the bed she was sleeping on.
2) My daughter went to their house at Christmas time & said that our tree was bigger than theirs.
3) When my daughter went to their house & asked if they could play & she told my daughter no, that my daughter glared at her & asked her why.

THESE were the examples why that I was given....

My thoughts....
1) doesnt everyone think that their own bed is more comfy?
2) We had a 12 foot tree!!! I doubt it was done out of hate, & I certainly dont think my child did it to hurt their feelings.
3) Is asking why such a bad thing?
I told the mom I was really sorry & even had my child call the mom to say she was sorry.

My child really likes this little girl, & since then they have played just a few times, but more times than not when we invite the girl to play the mom says the kids busy, it seems the only time the girl has come over is when her dads not around.
The kids have a terrific time here at our house...they never fight, it is laughter & good times.
I think it is the parents who just dont like our kid & I feel like there is nothing we can do tat will change their opinion.

At this point I have given up. I really dont want to call the mom again to ask why they cant play. I think I got the answer the first time around. She hasn't made any mention of any thing my daughter is doing wrong again, but I did ask her to tell me if any thing else happened right away.
My daughter is so sad.
Every time she asks if this little girl can play ...I am making excuses of why they cant by telling her the other kid is just busy.

How do you explain to a six year old that someones parents dont like her.
She's too young & I dont think would understand, nor should she have to deal with that at her age.

Again , she's not perfect, but I don't think these qualify her to be a disrespectful kid.

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Lakota - posted on 06/15/2012

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I wouldn't tell her that they don't like her, because it would hurt her feelings and I don't think that's the problem. I actually think that there's a problem with the other family. Sounds like the mother is very insecure about many things. I know it sounds weird that it could actually be taken out on your child, but, it does happen. Your daughter doesn't sound disrespectful, she's just honest. The other mother took what she said personal because I guess she wants your daughter to say "Everything in your house is better than mine." LOL Have one or two of your daughters classmates over to your house. She will make new friends quickly.

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Determined - posted on 09/16/2012

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I am having this same problem with my neighbor only my neighbor "S" doesn't have a problem with my daughter nor do I have hers. The problem is "S's" best friend doesn't like me (for God knows what reason I met the lady only once) but we live right across the street from each other. My daughter is always asking why she can't play with her friend and I don't know what to say, it's tough. Just find some new friends for her she'll adjust quickly.

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