Who has some DRAMA they want to share? come on go ahead and let it out. You know you want to!

Nikky - posted on 05/14/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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everyone needs to vent maybe you might even get soem useful feedback! so tell us your story or just let loose about the crapy day you had!!

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Leaha - posted on 06/02/2009

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I posted this to another forum I'm in, but thought maybe someone her would have some advice too.
*This may be a long one, But I need to vent!*
I don't even know where to start. I am so fed up with the ex girlfriend, the ex wife and my husbands family. It's like they aren't even his family, it's like they're hers. My husband and I have been married for just over 7 months now. We've been together for a little under 3 years. We've known each other for over 15 years. We went to school together and were in a relationship 12 years ago, but that ended when his ex girlfriend told him she was pregnant and if he ever wanted to see his child, he would not be with me. (but it was okay for her to be with 2 other men!) This is an incredibly complicated situation, but I'll do my best to explain. Ex number one, got pregnant before my husband and I started our relationship. He basically left me so he could see his first child, (this was while we were in high school). We went our separate ways and had seen each other several time in the next 11 years. Needless to say, the first ex, of course never let him see his first born, (and to this day we are still fighting for some form of visitation, we currently are lucky to see her once a year). Over the next 11 years, we both moved on and married other people, but were miserable. (in my opinion) I ran into him a little over 3 years ago at the place I work, and we started talking, and had a pretty nice conversation. Caught up on current times and reminisced on old times. I, at that time, had been separated from my then husband for 3 weeks and was going through the divorce proses. He informed me that he was also getting ready to go through a divorce from his then wife, but hadn't gotten everything "worked out" just yet. I continued to talk with him via email, and text messages. About 2 months after that, I started getting nasty calls and messages from his then wife, calling me a home wrecker among other things. A month later he finally moved out, and got a place of his own. That is when our relationship started to take on a more meaningful role. I still continued to get the nasty messages and evil glares in public. She had convinced his family that we were together before he left her, and I was the reason he "walked out on his family". His divorce was actually final before mine, as I have a daughter that my ex was fighting for custody (and still is). We moved in together after his divorce was final, and started to try and have our own life. His ex to this day, has tried to make our lives a living hell. She continues to talk trash about me, and threatens to take his 2 youngest children from him if we are seen doing something she doesn't approve of. She is the poster child for Parental Alienation Syndrome. The youngest, my ss, has called me "momma" since he started talking. Now, just this past week, he has started calling me by name, he says that "mommy beat my but I call Yeea momma" I'm sorry, but a 3 year old should not be being threatened by his mother for calling his step mother momma. I have not forced him or his sister to call me anything, they call me momma on their own. But, yes, now after being called momma for 2 years, it hurts to be called by name. I can get over that though. But I'm really having a problem with the ex-wife being so involved with my husband's family. For example, this past weekend was my FIL's bday, they had a cookout at their house, we had the kids for the weekend, so no need for the ex-wife to be there, correct? Wrong, she's there in all her glory. And of course, I'm the one who shouldn't be there. I'm the one who's bitter, I'm the one who needs to grow up. Why in the heck would I want to be around people that see me as a problem? Why should I put myself through the stress of dealing with people that have so much freaking anger towards me for something they "think" is true, but don't want to hear the truth? They take everything the ex wife says as gospel. My husband can't ever do anything right. And we are always the bad parents, or "part-time parent's" as the ex wife like to claim. I'm not really saying that I'm better than her, but I have a steady 40 hour a week job, that I've had for over 6 years. I support myself, my husband, and my daughter. I carry the health insurance, and pay for it out of my paycheck. We are barely making it week to week. My husband has a steady 40 hour a week job, but 3/4 of his paycheck goes to ungrateful exes like her for child support. She sits at home, refuses to work, lives off of her mentally challenged sisters disability check, child support and our daughters disability and Social Security checks (8 year old sd is has Williams Syndrome). Plus she lives off of the government benefits where we live and collects food stamps, rental assistance, additional food help for children(WIC), cash assistance, free insurance (medical card) and my husbands Grandmother baby sits for her for free. She goes over to her house everyday after school and get my SD off the bus and watches them while the ex wife goes out and runs around or just sits upstairs and plays on the computer. The ex wife makes more sitting on her big ass, than we do working! It's pathetic. The kids are always sick and take so many medications I can't even remember them all. She runs them around all hours of the day, takes them places that children should not be. When the kids come to our house for the weekend, the baby always has a diaper rash that is bleeding and you can tell it hurts him. By the time they go back to her, we have the rash all cleared up and he's a healthy little boy again. Same with my SD, she always comes so stuffed up and dehydrated and just exhausted. By the time they go home, she's breathing easy and feeling great. I just don't understand why it has to be this way, why do they think she is so perfect? When talking with my husband about this (we argue often about it) the only thing I ever get is "they're just scared that she's going to take the kids and they wont get to see them" HA! I've told him many times, she's not going anywhere, she's not THAT stupid, if she leaves the county she would lose all of her 'freebies" she's not going to risk that and have to actually get off her fat lazy ass and work... I'm just so completely lost, I wish I could get over it and just accept the fact that I married her too, and she's always going to be "the daughter" but damn it, why should I have to deal with that?

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Megann - posted on 02/18/2010

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I am a mother to a 2 yr old who shares the same father as my beautiful step-children. I am totally devastated by a post made by my husband’s ex-wife. I try my very best to be a nurturing and loving parent to all four of the kids. Yes, I have made some definite mistakes, but none of the ones that the mother has posted about me is true! It kills me that she doesn’t even want to try to get along. I know it must be hard for her, but every action that anyone makes (good or bad) has consequences and she is having to deal with some pretty aweful consequences due to her own mistakes. Yet, somehow she is so delusional or maybe just is completely unable to tell the truth, and that is why she blames me for everything.
I’ve been with her ex-husband for nearly three years. We ARE now married ON PAPER, but in the state of Texas, if a couple both claims to be husband and wife and reside in the same residence, then they are declared legally married. She obviously has never come to grips with that. They had been “married” for 8 years, not 10, like she suggests in her posts.
The fact that I used the last name Wilson was because my husband wanted me to have the same name as our son.
I met him AFTER she was busted for HER drugs and have a copy of the police report to prove that everything she states here about it is ABSOLUTELY absurd and nothing but SLANDER! She had moved out of “their” home on and off for several years. She had left her then husband and kids (their son was six months old at the time) to be with a known drug manufacturer at one point. At the time I met my now husband, he had filed for divorce two months earlier and she had moved out of their home and in a motel with another man. She only went to one divorce proceeding, which was the day before her first arrest-before I met my husband.
For her drug use, she had the children taken from her because she DID test positive for drugs (meth) during her probation. Now, come on! Can I be blamed for that? I do not bash her, but the children come home telling us how she calls me “the b* word” or other choice names and all kinds of lies about their father or me that I do not wish to even hear about, nor feel like such innocent children that don’t deserve such garbage should either, but that is out of our control. That’s when we asked the children not to worry about telling us EVERYTHING that she says, because in our hearts we know what she is doing, and I’m very happy with who I am because I try. I can look at myself in the mirror everyday and know that I am not miserable or a hurtful vengeful woman, but that I now am accountable for a family that I love very much.
I pray everyday, sometimes even more (especially when I hear what she does or says about me), for the mother of my step-kids. I encourage them to do the same, without any negativity. And, yet I am crucified for no reason. I have done nothing evil or malicious to her. I gave up a lot of things, even stayed at home instead of pursuing my career, which could be at risk with the things she has posted about me. This woman has refused to pick her children up when the courts have ordered it, because she wants them on different days that are very inconvenient for us to accommodate her, and I believe that’s why she asks for them. But, instead of taking the children on ordered dates, she just refuses to pick them up at all.
We have NEVER taken the kids out of school, and if a document was “falsified” then the legal system would have definitely been on top of it. Our school district doesn’t play with stuff like that.
Everything I say can be proven to be true. She has crossed the line over and over and over again, and somehow I am able to get through it because I know she is wrong for it and I’ve done nothing to deserve it.
She actually claims that I have the kids call me Mom, which is only partially true. I find it very difficult, but I did mention that I have a 2 yr old. He is calling me by my first name, and so when the kids are TALKING TO HIM REFERRING TO ME, that is the ONLY TIME they call me MOMMA. She has them call her husband (who she recently threw in jail for allegedly assaulting her, then dropped the charges, and now is taking the kids around him after telling them how horrible he was to her), well, she has had them call him “Daddy”. So, although I don’t agree with them calling me Mom, why would she really have a problem with it? Also, she calls her dad’s ex-wife (who raised her since she was seven) Momma, but she is actually her step-mother. I’m not knocking her mom/step-mom either, because she has been very nice, but I’m just trying to get a point across that this ex-wife of my husband’s is double minded and deceitful and apparently delusional as well.
Thank you for letting me finally get all of this out of my system. It does begin to way a person down.

Leaha - posted on 06/02/2009

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I posted this to another forum I'm in, but thought maybe someone her would have some advice too.
*This may be a long one, But I need to vent!*
I don't even know where to start. I am so fed up with the ex girlfriend, the ex wife and my husbands family. It's like they aren't even his family, it's like they're hers. My husband and I have been married for just over 7 months now. We've been together for a little under 3 years. We've known each other for over 15 years. We went to school together and were in a relationship 12 years ago, but that ended when his ex girlfriend told him she was pregnant and if he ever wanted to see his child, he would not be with me. (but it was okay for her to be with 2 other men!) This is an incredibly complicated situation, but I'll do my best to explain. Ex number one, got pregnant before my husband and I started our relationship. He basically left me so he could see his first child, (this was while we were in high school). We went our separate ways and had seen each other several time in the next 11 years. Needless to say, the first ex, of course never let him see his first born, (and to this day we are still fighting for some form of visitation, we currently are lucky to see her once a year). Over the next 11 years, we both moved on and married other people, but were miserable. (in my opinion) I ran into him a little over 3 years ago at the place I work, and we started talking, and had a pretty nice conversation. Caught up on current times and reminisced on old times. I, at that time, had been separated from my then husband for 3 weeks and was going through the divorce proses. He informed me that he was also getting ready to go through a divorce from his then wife, but hadn't gotten everything "worked out" just yet. I continued to talk with him via email, and text messages. About 2 months after that, I started getting nasty calls and messages from his then wife, calling me a home wrecker among other things. A month later he finally moved out, and got a place of his own. That is when our relationship started to take on a more meaningful role. I still continued to get the nasty messages and evil glares in public. She had convinced his family that we were together before he left her, and I was the reason he "walked out on his family". His divorce was actually final before mine, as I have a daughter that my ex was fighting for custody (and still is). We moved in together after his divorce was final, and started to try and have our own life. His ex to this day, has tried to make our lives a living hell. She continues to talk trash about me, and threatens to take his 2 youngest children from him if we are seen doing something she doesn't approve of. She is the poster child for Parental Alienation Syndrome. The youngest, my ss, has called me "momma" since he started talking. Now, just this past week, he has started calling me by name, he says that "mommy beat my but I call Yeea momma" I'm sorry, but a 3 year old should not be being threatened by his mother for calling his step mother momma. I have not forced him or his sister to call me anything, they call me momma on their own. But, yes, now after being called momma for 2 years, it hurts to be called by name. I can get over that though. But I'm really having a problem with the ex-wife being so involved with my husband's family. For example, this past weekend was my FIL's bday, they had a cookout at their house, we had the kids for the weekend, so no need for the ex-wife to be there, correct? Wrong, she's there in all her glory. And of course, I'm the one who shouldn't be there. I'm the one who's bitter, I'm the one who needs to grow up. Why in the heck would I want to be around people that see me as a problem? Why should I put myself through the stress of dealing with people that have so much freaking anger towards me for something they "think" is true, but don't want to hear the truth? They take everything the ex wife says as gospel. My husband can't ever do anything right. And we are always the bad parents, or "part-time parent's" as the ex wife like to claim. I'm not really saying that I'm better than her, but I have a steady 40 hour a week job, that I've had for over 6 years. I support myself, my husband, and my daughter. I carry the health insurance, and pay for it out of my paycheck. We are barely making it week to week. My husband has a steady 40 hour a week job, but 3/4 of his paycheck goes to ungrateful exes like her for child support. She sits at home, refuses to work, lives off of her mentally challenged sisters disability check, child support and our daughters disability and Social Security checks (8 year old sd is has Williams Syndrome). Plus she lives off of the government benefits where we live and collects food stamps, rental assistance, additional food help for children(WIC), cash assistance, free insurance (medical card) and my husbands Grandmother baby sits for her for free. She goes over to her house everyday after school and get my SD off the bus and watches them while the ex wife goes out and runs around or just sits upstairs and plays on the computer. The ex wife makes more sitting on her big ass, than we do working! It's pathetic. The kids are always sick and take so many medications I can't even remember them all. She runs them around all hours of the day, takes them places that children should not be. When the kids come to our house for the weekend, the baby always has a diaper rash that is bleeding and you can tell it hurts him. By the time they go back to her, we have the rash all cleared up and he's a healthy little boy again. Same with my SD, she always comes so stuffed up and dehydrated and just exhausted. By the time they go home, she's breathing easy and feeling great. I just don't understand why it has to be this way, why do they think she is so perfect? When talking with my husband about this (we argue often about it) the only thing I ever get is "they're just scared that she's going to take the kids and they wont get to see them" HA! I've told him many times, she's not going anywhere, she's not THAT stupid, if she leaves the county she would lose all of her 'freebies" she's not going to risk that and have to actually get off her fat lazy ass and work... I'm just so completely lost, I wish I could get over it and just accept the fact that I married her too, and she's always going to be "the daughter" but damn it, why should I have to deal with that?

Nikky - posted on 05/18/2009

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I had preeclampsia with my pregnancy too. and I totally feel you on my body being ruined and not wanting to make it worse. the only diffrence is I wany a little girl. my boyfriend has 2 boys from his privious marriage and we just had our little boy in march. he has commitment issues though so dont think I will get my wish. I dont really have any advice for you other than u r absolutely right ur not a factory and I would refuse to have babies just because he wants a boy! its not like you really get a choice on what you have. I dont know how to get you man motivated but just stand your ground and tell him u absolutely will not have any motivation to have another baby until he has motivation to help u support a larger family. and there is no way that taking birth control is killing a baby its preventing one from happening but its not killing.

Samantha - posted on 05/18/2009

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ok...so..my husband is driving me crazy! we have one child, an 8 month old little girl. i love her to death and she is my world. the problem is that my husband is sooooooo pushy about having more kids. i had a horrible pregnancy/labor with getting preeclampsia, my daughter was in the NICU and i honestly just dont want to go through that again. my body is literally destroyed because of all of it and i dont think i could handle my body getting any worse if i were to get pregnant again. all my husband talks about is how he wants a boy blah blah blah. i said that maybe we could have one more baby later in a few years when i finish school but like i said, all he talks about is wanting a boy.. so what if the next baby is a girl? he said then hed want to try again. seriously, i am not going to keep having babies just so he can have a boy. i am not a factory and i do have feelings. i really dont want that many kids. i am perfectly happy with just one. then when i took my birth control he called me a murderer because i was killing a baby, which i explained to him is NOT TRUE, but he said thats how he sees it. he says im interfering with Gods plans by trying to control when/if we have kids. he said he doesnt want me to be on birth control at all and just see what happens. i am NOT going to be like that stupid show '18 kids and counting'! screw that! and my husband doesnt even have a good job so he couldnt support more than one kid anyways! and he refuses to do something with his life and have some sort of career. hes happy with working so crappy dead end job; well im not. i told him we could have another baby when he has a career. i dont know, part of me hoped that would motivate him, but a big part of me is like i wont have to worry about having anymore kids because he'll never actually go try and make something of his life. im stuck. i feel like he doesnt care about me and how i feel and he disregards all the trauma i went through with my pregnancy and downplays the seriousness of the condition. he doesnt care that i could die or the baby could die since i am extremely likely to get preeclampsia again. i thought i was more important than his stupid desire to have a soccer teams worth of kids. but i guess not, i guess losing me is a risk he's willing to take

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