18 month old new to daycare

Patrice - posted on 02/26/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

25

13

1

Please help. My 18 month old just started daycare for the first time and it seems as if she is not adjusting well. She cries when I drop her off and when I get back she is still moaning. The providers say that she doesn't cry all day, just when she realizes that I am not there. Is there anything I can do to help her ease that transition? I am embarassed that "my" child acts like this and bad that I leave her crying everyday. I don't know what to do. I am sick to my stomach when I go to pick her up from the guilt that I left her in a place that she may not be happy. What can I do?????

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Tiffany - posted on 03/06/2010

31

2

6

oh my dear don't feel bad, it's not you, and there is NOTHING wrong with your sweet baby! I'm the mother of four, I worked at the daycare center and my kid was the one who cried ALL DAY LONG. Each child has an adjustment period, and at 18 months it shouldn't be too long. Consistancy is the key. If you are happy and excited when you drop her off (versus giving off negative, sad, or desperate vibes) your baby will pick up on that. Do the same thing each morning...getting dressed, doing hair, having breakfast... routine makes todddlers feel more secure. It also helped my little girl when I took something of mommy's and left it with her. I left her with my scarf most days and she would wear it around her neck and it smelled like mom, that made her happier. It also helped, to be honest, when I switched her to a day care with smaller class size. For my daughter it was just too much stimulus to go to daycare for the first time in a class of 20 other kids.

Kathryn - posted on 03/01/2010

88

11

5

my daughter started daycare at 18 months and she would cry and sream all day...there was maybe 5 min she wouldn't...she finally attached herself to one of the workers who she loves and once she realized that i wasn't leaving her there forever and that i was coming back she slowly got better...it took about 2 weeks...she is 3 years old now and still at the same daycare and loves to go now...although somedays she does still cry...don't feel bad about leaving her there...i felt that way too but i realized that in order for me to be able to work and go to school so i could better our lives it was something i had to do...i know some places don't like for kids to bring anything in with them but see if she can bring her favorite toy or blanket...for my daughter it was a "squishy" pillow that she has had since she was 2 weeks old...that might help..having something that she knows is hers..i also placed a picture of my and her in her backpack so if she needed to look at it she could..i hope things work out for you and just keep trying...she will begin to calm down and start to settle in ..

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

6 Comments

View replies by

Memaw - posted on 03/07/2010

10

5

2

I would hate for you to give up on Daycare because of that one place. I don't think I could accept all that daily negative feedback from the daycare workers either, there's something not right about that. You would expect them to be better trained than that. Personally, I have had more unfortunate experiences with private home care for my 3 children; and of course, that's NOT to say that you will have the same experiences, or that this would be a bad decision if you do, there are plenty of good home care. I would try a different daycare first; with a more positive outlook on it because you're right, the little ones DO pick up on our emotions. I really feel that in the long run, children get so much more out of a structured Daycare setting.

Patrice - posted on 03/06/2010

25

13

1

Thanx ladies, it's glad to hear I am not alone in this battle with daycare. I changed our morning routine so I could spend a lil more time with her. I think she was picking up on my negative/anxious energy. I am comfortable with her providers but feel that maybe a home daycare setting may be more comforting with her since she is used to being home with either myself or my mother. IDK. Her class only has 6 or 7 kids but I think the strict nature of the center is too much for her. Everyday I have a 5-10 min update on what she is NOT doing. I don't know how to take it. It just adds to the guilt. Sorry to be so longwinded but I just needed to vent and see if others were in the same boat.

[deleted account]

my daughter startd daycare at 1years old she is 1 1/2 now and she still cries when i drop her off. i found that if i let her take a toy she loves that helps her feel more comfortable other then that theres nothing i could do to stop it just let her cry and shed get over it

Patrice - posted on 03/05/2010

25

13

1

Thanx so much for the advice. I gave her a stuffed animal from home and she quieted down some. It has been a little over a week and yesterday she didn't cry at all except for when I drop her off!! It is sooo hard but in order for us to be better parents, daycare is a necessary evil.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms