Bed time arguments

Neva - posted on 06/09/2012

How old is your son? I agree that bedtime ritual is important. Start out by telling him that you are going to start a routine and you expect him to follow it. Turn off electronics at least an hour before you want your child to go to bed, and there should not be any TV or other electronics in the bedroom. Start with a snack, bath, tooth brushing, jammies on and then potty, story time and kiss goodnight.. Tell him that there will be no drinks or potty once he is in bed. Then leave the room. If he gets up, the first time he gets up tell him its bedtime and put him back. After that first time, no matter what he says, don't answer. You can't argue if you don't answer back. If he gets up, simply walk him back to bed, put him in, then go sit at the foot of the bed, in the dark. Look down at the floor. If he gets up, as soon as his feet hit the floor, get up and put him back, but no talking, engaging in any way and go sit back on the floor. Since he is used to an arguement, this first time may take a while. He'll also try to get you to talk to him, but don't do it. When I did this with my children and grandchildren, the hardest part was not laughing about the funny things they would say, like "what are you doing there?" Why are you on the floor, this is silly, etc." So every time their little feet hit the floor, you just simply get up quietly and put them back in bed and go back to sit down, no talking, yelling or arguing on your part. They will eventually figure out that getting out of bed is not getting them anywhere. Don't give any drinks or allow a potty break, cause they already did this, remember? Each night should take less and less time as long as you are consistent.By the end of a week, your child should be going to bed without any problem.

Beth - posted on 06/09/2012

Don't give him the choice. Make sure that you have a clear routine for bed with some winding down time. Warn him on the approach to the bedtime routine, so that he knows what's coming up. As for the arguments, he's probably using it as as a delaying tactic.

I know that when my youngest gets over tired, she'll come down several times because she 'wants' cuddles, to be with me. I tell her bedtime and I won't come to see her for a cuddle till she's in bed quiet. (Had the 'I want Mummy' routine tonight, I refused to give her a cuddle until she was in bed. Every time she came down, she was sent back up to bed. When she finally got back in bed and was quiet, then I went up and gave her a cuddle and kiss, then left her to cuddle her toy to go to sleep).

My bedtime routing for my girls is slightly flexible - allowing for busy days, level of tiredness etc., but the basic structure remains the same. Basic night - warning to go to bed, tell them to get into their bed clothes, hair, toilet/teeth, goodnight kisses/cuddles, then go to sleep. Which can be extended to having showers (hair washed as appropriate), change into bedclothes then come down for some relaxation time and/or books in bed. Again varies depending on what else is happening that/next day, how tired they are etc..

Milissa - posted on 06/09/2012

Make a routine and stick to it ALWAYS. How old is he?

Brush teeth
Bath
Potty
Story
Hugs and kisses
Bed
Lullaby

must be a consequence for disobedience. Immediate for 5 and younger.
Not a spanker? find an alternative solution. Let him cry it out in bed a few nights. Make sure you know you are serious.

M