can't do it anymore!

Carla - posted on 12/07/2009 ( 67 moms have responded )

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do any single moms out there feel like they just can't do it by themselves anymore?
what do you do when you feel that way?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Michele Marie - posted on 12/07/2009

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I used to feel like that ...becuz the ex never took his sons @ all . But ya know I ma glad I did raise my sons alone . It made us stronger as a family ..just us 3 . My sons r now going on 20 in feb & just turned 17 .Im still amzed I did it ...but yes there was rough times . Ur strong trust me U can do it . When I feel I cant take it .. i just think of how others have done it . Like long ago raisin 12 kids ect in the real old days livin though depression .. or a very sick child . Then I know I thankful that my kids r heathly & so am I . I tell my sons they cant have everything , becuz there dad doesnt help w anything . Its all me trying to do it alone ..they understand . Not that it doesnt hurt ... but now they know the vaule of making ur own $$ & being proud of who U r . Plus when I am really down .. I eat choc or strawberry cheesecake ben & jerry ice cream shhhh .

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Amanda - posted on 08/30/2012

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Honey, I know EXACTLY how you feel, only difference is? I have a boyfriend, but guess what he doesn't help with ANYTHING! Not even financially... He is the baby's father, and he loves the baby, but that just isn't cutting it. I feel you big time! Keep your head up, our rewards will pay off in the end :)

[deleted account]

Quoting carla:

i have no one to take her even for a little while everything is all on me no one helps



See if you can find a highschool girl who could come sit with the baby for a couple of hours and take a break you deserve it most highschool girls don't charge very much and you could use the break even if its only long enough to take a walk any kind of exercise you can find to do will make a big difference a short walk is wonderful. Hope it all works out for you.

[deleted account]

Quoting Erin:

i only recently single like 2 days b4 new year and i have 7 kids so im really feel like i cant do it any more i was wid him 17 yrs so i scared 2 death at the mo but i just think of my kids and my friends that r helpin me through i understand u completely feelin so alone at the mo tryin not to use food 2 comfort myself just keep doin housework which is mad cause i hate it but i feel better 4 it all the best 4 ur future may great happiness be comin ur way and mine lol



Just sit back and take a deep breath you will be ok you might not think so now but you will. Try to find a hobbie working out is a awesome way to get rid of stress and gives you time to think while working out and the better you feel about yourself you wont want to turn to food. Stay busy doing somthing you like. I am single mother and working out is a big stress reliever for me. I wish you all the luck in the world and wish you many blessings and good things to come in your life.



Make this year a great year.

Jennifer - posted on 01/03/2010

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Yeah our children truly are a gift and we are thrown into motherhood and its like: "whoa! i have this life that I am responsible for" then you smile, because doesn't make mistakes and you know that God hand selected YOU to be that child's mother and though you may not see it, you say: "Okay God, You are the Man with the plan and I ask that You help me through this as you know I am so human (he made us that way so I think He knows that we get a little scared and overwhelmed and He is confident and can handle our feelings, in fact He delights in our honesty with Him... its called a REAL relationship, not a religion.) That helps me to get back to the bottom line and He ALWAYS comes through for me at the right time (not MY time) because I asked Him. He is a gentleman at his CORE so He will never impose Himself, but He will continue to pursue us as He is the ultimate perfection.. but when we let Him help, boy does He delight in helping us and teaching us. I read alot of parenting books and stick close to my safe friends that have my best interest in mind.. and yes FLYLEAF! Oh wait I said that :) Hehe. I love this post. It really hits the heart of our struggles. Thank you for being so brave in your honesty.

Keyala - posted on 01/03/2010

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OF COURSE THERE ARE GOING TO BE MOMENTS WHERE YOU FEEL YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH, THEN THATS WHERE YOU PUT YOUR SELF ON TIME OUT FOR A FEW MINUTES AND GET YOURSELF 2GETHER. CRY A LITTLE IF YOU NEED TO, THEN U SUCK IT UP AND PUT A SMILE ON AND GO KISS THE LITTLE ANGLE GOD BLESSED YOU WITH :)

[deleted account]

Yes I feel like every day is a struggle to just to get out of bed. I feel like I have no time for me. But I have decided you have to take time for your self other wise it just gets worse. I have decided that I am going to start going to our local YMCA and start working out for 1 hr after work M-F and then give the kids all my time on the weekends. I think that will help me to feel better and better about myself.

Jennifer - posted on 01/03/2010

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I have sometimes felt like that i admit. When i get completely overwhelmed by everything. But then i just think about my little girls and what a blessing they are in my life and where i wo uld be without them and i feel lots better! Keep your head up and just take it day by day. You can get through this!!! Just remember who you are doing this all for. I am kind of glad that i am raising them because i know what kind of morals i am instilling in my children and have no other influences on them by their father. So just keep your head up and think of all the positive things that you are doing with your child(ren). Good luck sweetie :)

Michelle - posted on 01/03/2010

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Quoting carla:

can't do it anymore!

do any single moms out there feel like they just can't do it by themselves anymore?
what do you do when you feel that way?



yes, I had a complete meltdown right before xmas. I've never had one of them before. I just cried and called my friend and she came over and helped me. But it is hard when you are a working mom and trying to juggle work, school and kids. Financially impossible. When I start feeling over whelmed because my 2 oldest aren't listening and fighting. I put them both in there room and seperate them. take the baby and give myself a time out. I know it is hard but it is so much better then yelling at them. I'd like to know what I can do about the sibling rivarly.



My advise would be try to take more time for yourself go out with your friends at least 1x a month...I call it mommy time.



Good luck,



 



 

Erin - posted on 01/03/2010

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i only recently single like 2 days b4 new year and i have 7 kids so im really feel like i cant do it any more i was wid him 17 yrs so i scared 2 death at the mo but i just think of my kids and my friends that r helpin me through i understand u completely feelin so alone at the mo tryin not to use food 2 comfort myself just keep doin housework which is mad cause i hate it but i feel better 4 it all the best 4 ur future may great happiness be comin ur way and mine lol

[deleted account]

I have been a single mom of two kids for 20 years. Yes it has been hard and I have cried many times. If I am feeling really down I pick up the phone and call friends and family to get the emotional help and sometimes the financial help I need. My youngest son is 10 and he has ADHD and he can be a challenge at times. You just have to remember that you need to be there for your kids, what would they do without you? Think about the things that make you happy. Go for a walk, read a book, play games with your kids. Try to do something for yourself. You have to take care of yourself. There are so many single Moms out there. You can do it. Just hang in there.

Lakesha - posted on 01/02/2010

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It's always good to have a support system. I have four sisters, and two brothers. Both of my parents are here. I'm having another little girl soon, and I know that my sisters are ready to look after my other children after my c-section. If you don't have alot of family around you, stick to your friends, or other single moms doing what you do. It's hard, but I never let that feeling cross my mind. If their fathers don't want to be in their life, to bad for them, they loose out. Find a support group in your area, they always look out for each other.

Eva - posted on 01/02/2010

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I am a single parent to 10 month old little boy and there are days when i just feel i wanna give up ... Those are the days when i look at my son and know he needs me and im proud to be his mommy.. I try to think of all the good things about my situation and come to terms with the negative side of things

Danielle - posted on 01/02/2010

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yes i get like that quit a bit. i just usually go to my room and cry for a while. or find a sitter to just take a break. than i come home and sit in the complete silence and think. i have been on my own since i found out i was pregnant with my 5 year old and it is hard. but in the end it is all worth it. if u have ur family and friends there to help you.

Bec - posted on 01/02/2010

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I am a single mum with three very active young boys. My ex doesn't do anywhere near enough when it comes to spending time on his kids. Myyoungest (aged 3) broke his leg the day after Xmas. He has plaster all the way up his leg and cant do a thing to help himself. He just fires demands all day.... I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, I'm bored, change the chanel etc ALL day. What does the ex do. He walks into our home and proceeds to load his car & trailer with all the house hold furniture, inlcuding my bed & matress!! He left me with the kids bed!! He even took the kitchen table & chairs, cutlery and TV!! His reason for doing this is that I have the kids & he has nothing so the next best thing is the furniture. If you ask me he has things so wrong. Kids are not a possession. They are people who have feelings. All you can do is the best you can. If you want to break down and cry then do it, even if the kids see it, it only shows you are a person too. If you are not a social person and dont want to go out and meet people the internet is the best thing. There are people to give the support & comments that will help you get through the worst of it. Hang in there. The older the kids get the easier it gets

Jennifer - posted on 01/02/2010

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yes! I still go through moments like that.. because I'm human!! hehe. But I do have to admit that as I grow as a person, I find it less and less. Me, I pray, I journal, I try to figure out ways to find the situation a little easier, I go to my laundry room and cry and talk to God and I go to some of the few other single mom's and talk honestly about my struggles and gain support and when I get really mad or frusterated.. I work out and I power clean my house to heavy metal music or punk (Flyleaf is MY GIRL!) hehe.. you are not alone in how you feel and its normal to be frusterated and angry at the irresponsibilites of the other "person" and the selfishness of all of it that seems to come down on you.. but that is what we are here for.. to support!! find what works for you and if you need me to send you some FLYLEAF (a little female energy is good!) let me know! :)

LeKeisha - posted on 12/31/2009

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I know it's hard girl but you can do it! I'll tell you what you do; whenever you can get some time for yourself, take it. I know you'll probably feel like you're being selfish but we mamas need our time too. Otherwise we can't be good mamas.

Erika - posted on 12/30/2009

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I just sit and cry for as long as it takes. Then I wipe my face, get my head up high and pick up whatever I was doing when I felt it. It'll pass.
It's a bit like an axiety attack, we start thinking about everything and all the implications and how tired we are and suddenly we can't handle it all. The trick is to break down information and obligations. Right now, what do you really need to do? Are you sick? Are you in danger? You will find out that probably not. So, just think about the present, never mind tomorrow and next week. We do it one day at a time.
I remember when I decided not to abort my son, when I was 6 weeks pregnant and his dad told me I HAD to abort, I prepared myself for three years of pure hardworking hell, with a newborn and a six-year-old daughter that just started 1st grade too. My son just turned 3 a month ago. Now I laugh and I kinda miss those crazy days I hardly remember coz I didn't sleep, I was always tired and I also didn't have anyone to help. I kept myself in a kind of a dreamy condition, not worrying, not thinking too much. Time flies and here I am. It seems harder today, each day, though I know it's not. It's just that old bug trying to get me in panic.
My kids are happy, healthy, smart and have manners. Their fathers are losers that don't even get our respect and aren't even near to break our peaceful days.
You know? I read all posts and I absolutely admired every single mom here, I think you all must be the most powerful women in the world and I wish I was as good as you. Then I notice I am one too. We will all take one day at a time and before we know it our kids will be parents too :-))

Renee' - posted on 12/30/2009

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Ive been a single mom for 8 years. Basically when i feel like that i know i need a break away from them (2 children). I find a friend that can take them or a family member that is willing to take them for a weekend (if you don't have neither one of these, a county assistance program or a church maybe able to help). Then when Monday comes, i am fresh and ready to start again. I used to get that way about once a month, and now that my children are older (11 & 12) it is every 4-6 months or so. During this past 8 years ive been through many trials and tribulations, but some how managed to get through it. I went back to school received my bachelors degree, my kids are in sports and they earn high grades. I think is all in the way you look at things. I look at things as if im the main person in there life, now am i going to just slack and be an ok parent or am i going to give it my all and create respectable & responsible kids that will be contributor to society. Life is full of choices and if you want to do something for your children, you will do what you need to do in order for them to see what it takes to be a contributing member of society and just the fact alone that you can beat the statistics of "single parenthood" is so powerful. If i can do it....so can you! It has made my kids and i closer and stronger as a family unit. Dont get me wrong....its a daily struggle, but like anything else, if you put enough time and effort into it...its going to be great!
Good luck and if you think of what you can do for your babies that will give them a future and keep them safe, you will do it, with some breaks once in awhile when you need them.
Life is CHOICES.....in that....what are you going to do about it? God is watching over you and he see's your potential. Dont give up...you are stronger than what you think. Just look into your child's eyes and decide what you are going to do.
Best wishes and God bless.....

[deleted account]

just keep on going is the only way i tell myself that everday and think in my head at least they have me

Carrie - posted on 12/30/2009

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All the time remember us mothers are the strongest people out there don't ever give up look in your childs eys and your find your motivation, trust me i have three boys 15,10 and 9 and want to scream as loud as i can sometimes and give up but i don't for them they keep me strong

Jenn - posted on 12/29/2009

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i am a single mom of three under 5 years old. my husband left when i was 4 months pregnant with our third, and yes, sometimes it feels like i'm being smothered by the responsibility that is completely on my shoulders. He is a part of their lives, but it's very complicated, and he's around in a way that makes life almost MORE difficult were he just 'not'. a couple of months ago, i started seeing another man, in a very limited fashion, as i'm not the type to confuse my children in any way... and he said something to me that really struck a chord. He grew up the only child of a single mother himself, and one day when i was particularly stressed and trying really hard to handle everything without breaking, he told me that even though his mother never said anything to him, he knew how hard things were for her when he was young. he always knew when things were tight, and that he knew when she was upset about something, but he will always admire her and have pride in how she handled herself.
it's hard. it's stressful, and yes, sometimes after bath time, and story-time and bed time and after the tidying and lunch packing and laundry folding you do after they are all tucked away and asleep.. sitting down on the couch and crying for a few minutes is the only thing you can do to make yourself feel better. do it. and move on :) you can do it. we all can... it's what makes us 'mommy'. as long as your children know that mommy loves them, and will always be there for anything and everything they will be secure and happy and healthy. whatever you need to do, whether it be crying it out once they're in bed, or eating a bowl of ice cream, or taking up crochet lol do it, and be proud of yourself ;)

[deleted account]

When i feel this way i look at my daughter and what i have achieved so far by myself and the proud feeling i get from that picks me back up, we cant just stop they need us to stay strong for them ;) also a good night out helps :)

Michelle - posted on 12/23/2009

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You truely are not alone! My child is 4 and now more independent. It does get better. When he was younger I thought no one could do it better than mommy. Now I have swallowed my pride and ask others for a chance to breathe. Two hours can be a breath of fresh air. You can do it! God has seen me through many trials. Be blessed!

Heide - posted on 12/20/2009

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I think about all those women who try and cannot have children. We are so fortunate to be mothers and experience the only true love there is..the love from your child. The time will come where she will be the person who helps you the most…in time.

Debbie - posted on 12/20/2009

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I have SO BEEN THERE!!!! Just this last year is the most I have had a babysitter out of the whole seven years of my daughter. I was working two jobs and going to school and was praying for a break but could not afford a babysitter. Girl pray for a way!! I PROMISE you it will happen!!!!!

Debbie - posted on 12/20/2009

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Hardest job in the world is being a single mom. It's even harder when you don't have support or a sitter when you badly in need for a break. I pray for strength and the answer when I need encouragement. I have only two close friends with children and do not know anyone else. Both of my friend are married so it is hard to spend time together. I think it is great for single moms to get together!! I am still looking for a no drama group to hang out like have game night or do a group rate and take the kids to a play. I know a lot of great things to do for a good price. I go to school and work part time now after being laid of so I have had to budget the whole seven years of my daughters life. :) My adivce for you is to surround yourself with love and encouragement. It's a hard job being a single mom but I know I am not the only one and there is always someone else that has had it worse than you and still makes it everyday. :)

HEATHER - posted on 12/20/2009

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i know exactly how ur feeling iv only been a single mum to my 2 girls age 1 and 3 for 8 months now after leaving an abusive relationship we there dad. its the hardest thing in my life to do expecially as he doesnt really have anything to do we them and when he does hes there for a few days then stops all contact again. i wake up every morning and wonder how im going to get through and just sometimes wish it was all over. but my kids keep me going im trying to get out more make some new friends and the one thing i say to my self every day is life can only get better i think its just going to take time. iv cried, iv screemed and iv wondered why im putting my self through it but they always remind me its for them i live for them

Bobbie - posted on 12/19/2009

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Quoting Deidre:

There is a reason for the saying " IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO RAISE A FAMILY" . Because it's true! I'm new to this neighborhood and I'm cool with just staying to myself most of the time... But it is kind of dangerous to not have ANY people to call on in case of an emergency. In my case I've introduced myself around to a couple of people. But to tell you the truth when it all comes down to it no one can EVER come through for me!!! So I've forced myself to be reliant on GOD! He never let's me down. Especially in a pinch.Just don't be too proud to put yourself out there. People can't read our minds. So ask... Someone may surprise you.


 



I didnt know what i was going to do when i had my daughter Symone.My mom couldnt really help me as much and her father is no were to be found. Untill one day a older lady told me to bring symone over to her, so she could see her. I did and my village started. One day i had to go to the store and it was raining, i was on my way out the door untill the same lady i became friends with said "i will keep her for u". I cried like a baby, because i knew that my heartace for my help was over. Now i have a BIG village family. All i have to do is open my mouth and ask. Its hard, i know but it will not hurt. Because if one person can't help that one person may know some one that will.

Deevah - posted on 12/19/2009

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I know how you feel your going to have to take time out for you ...i know this is going to sound messed up but ppl in my circle would only watch my child only if i went to work. so i decided in order to keep my sanity i would let them watch her doing those hours and would not tell them i did not go to work that day .. i woluld dress for work tell them i might have meetings that day and wud be away from my desk so its best to call my cell in case of emergency and call out of work aka sick of course so i can still get paid and i would do that on a friday or monday so it seems like i had a 3 day weekend and that is how i get through it every other month. hope this helps and give u an idea

Sharee - posted on 12/18/2009

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I have definitely had that feeling, but every time I look @ my daughter, I know I have to do whatever it is to make her life comfortable. She didn't ask to be here....so it's up to me to take care of her. If I sit around & wait for her dad to step up, be a man, & take care of his responsibilty....then i'd be waiting forever. My boyfriend & family are sooo supportive, so really...i'm not doin it alone.

Elizabeth - posted on 12/17/2009

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Sometimes but when I look at him I known I am all he has and he depends on me to get both of us ahead.

Sarah - posted on 12/17/2009

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I think about where I would be if I didnt have my son... and I think about Where I would be if i would have stayed with his father.... both situations i wouldn't have been as strong as I am now! It is hard but what in life is easy?! Atleast we are paid in kisses and hugs even if with every kiss you have to endurer a few tantrums... its all worth it in the end! We are here because we care about our children and we want to see them do great things, thats why we work sooo hard to be the best we can be for them!

Theresa - posted on 12/14/2009

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I feel that way sometimes, especially when everything seems to be going wrong and then I feel guilty for having a baby with a man who doesn't care. When I get to that point, I take a step back and look at what I'm trying to get done and what I have gotten done, and reassure myself that I love my son more than anything, and we'll both get through this. I tell myself that I'm doing the best I can with what I've got...



Reflection and relaxation is key! Just know that you're not alone in this, no matter how it feels at the time. Take a few minutes to yourself, and be sure to remind yourself that you're doing the best you can...it will get better! =]

[deleted account]

I know how you feel. Especially during the holidays it is hard. There are many times I just want to give up but you have to think your child/ren need you to be strong and to show them how to cope with problems. Taking some time to yourself helps and crying alone relieves alot of stress.

Heather - posted on 12/13/2009

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You can can and you will, because look at that little face! She's beautiful and she's yours and she needs you to carve that path that will create a wonderful young adult. Like another poster, I've been doing it completely alone for almost 12 years now. And, it IS hard. There are days when you feel like you just can't take another step, change another diaper, make another meal, pretend to laugh when you want to cry - but you will, for her. I promise it will get easier. But, for now, try journaling. Seriously, it helps. Write it down, get it out. Write stories, write poetry (it doesn't have to rhyme!) - talk a walk with her, sing her songs, be as super silly as you possibly can be. When you put her to bed at night, take a nice long bath, light a few smell good candles and just relax - wherever you can - treat yourself well. I often forgot to do that when she was young, but you need to be good to you as much as she needs you to be good to her.

Find a single mommy group in your area, they often are willing to share babysitting duties. Join a playdate group - the kids play - mommies get to chat and socialize.
Whatever you can do, do it........!

Best of Luck!

Theresa - posted on 12/13/2009

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I know what you mean - the financial pressures and everything add up - I pray ALOT. You can call the exchange club - they have respite care as well as free parenting classes;. Good luck - God Bless -if your in BHAM AL I can help

Lisa - posted on 12/13/2009

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I feel like that when im having a bad day with my son and i have nobody else to take him for me so i cant have a break, but i think to myself he wont be dependant forever the bigger they get the more independant they get and then hopefully start helping you haha! Also i think im putting in the hard work and his father is nowhere to be seen but he will grow up to love me and not him, so the hard work pays off as nobody will love you like your own children do!

Katlynn - posted on 12/13/2009

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i fell very much the same way, i have raised my daughter bymyself since day one, her father has choosen never to come meet her because he doesnt want to see me, and it is very overwhelming. Every so often i just have to put her down and go sit out side bymyself and regroup, and every night after i put her to bed i take some time for myself to just relax. You just cant forget about you.

Dawn - posted on 12/13/2009

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its hardbeing a single mom, but when you get so stressed out you dont feel you can do it anymore. reach out, see if your children can have a playdate with a friend, stay overnight at gramma and grandpas place. even take them to day care but take an afternoon off just to yourself. Time to regroup, and give yourself a lil mommy time. I like to splurge on a new book a bag of chocolate of some kind, slap on a face mask and either soak in a hot tub until i prune or me and miss clairol decide its time for the grey hairs to GO! I dont know your specific situation, but you CAN do this, just remember to take a moment for yourself, even if its just to relax, and breath.

Nicole - posted on 12/13/2009

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I´m a single mother of 3 children. After I left my husband I moved to Germany to be close to my parents because my dad retired here (Army) ... my parents split up shortly after I got there.. my dad moved back to the states and my mom is currently enjoying her freedom. I watch my neighbors 2 kids alot because she is a young mom (19) and cant take the stress..... so I´m in a foreign Country with my 3 kids and 2 neglegted neighbor kids.... friends I did make moved back to the states again cause their tour was up ... so basicaly I AM ALONE!! And if i can do it anyone can. I dont even get child support.. I´m glad the German government has a fantastic welfare system. No food stamps... great medical and when your youngest child turns 3 they help you find a job ect. Dont get me wrong ... the money is hella hella!! tight but i wanted my kids and I´m dealing with it. I have a special screaming pillow that i cry into once in a while .. that usually helps... and when I´m really down I call my family.... not much they can do except listen but it helps alot. I also try laughing atleast 10 times a day. even if its over stupid silly stuff. I also give thanks that we are all healthy. ..... Keep your head up...

Becca - posted on 12/12/2009

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Carla I understand what you are saying, but stop, the baby is here and you are doing it by yourself! Look at what you have done (yep the glass half full theory) I have 2 kids and nobody to help including the dad. Routine is a big party of life and let me tell you I LOVE bedtime!! Join the library reading group for babies and make friends with other moms your age, maybe you can make a friend that you can trust to sit and vice versa. Join a church most have nursery during service...you can do it. And after the baby is in bed, do something you like, read a book, start a hobby like needle work watch a movie that is not by Disney! lol And remember, this is such a short time of the childs life one day you will wake up and that baby is going to be at school all day! And just fo rthe record, put the baby in the playpen and call a friend chat on the 'puter even if the baby is crying! Good luck

Dawn - posted on 12/12/2009

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I am going to make this short and sweet. You can do it. I am a single mother and have been for ten years or so. It has its good and bad days. But you will get through it. I don't know how old your child is but mine is almost 12 and believe me more and more I get the teenage attitude ugh so you don't think you can now just wait. Financially for me I do struggle. But I know you will make it!

Anna - posted on 12/12/2009

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I've hit that point MANY MANY times. When my son was first born his dad was deployed for the first 6 months, he was home just a short time before I packed up and we left. We were living away from all family and I didn't trust anyone to watch my son. He had several health issues, and I was going to school full time- I thought I would EXPLODE. I would try to take some time for myself while he was sleeping or napping. There were times when I knew he was okay and nothing was wrong other then he wanted me but at that moment I was not able to tend to him and he'd just have to cry for a little bit or figure out how to entertain himself. It's hard. I'm not closer to family but they all work full time and maybe can only help out 1 day twice a month. We're starting daycare next month and am sooo thrilled about it. Definately look into some church groups with moms day outs and things like that!

[deleted account]

I have a lot of those moments, but if I don't do it who will? My ex and his psychotic girlfriend?? No thank you!! Hang in there!

Allyson - posted on 12/12/2009

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Carla, im not a single mom, but i am, u know, there are programs in some states that have whats called a respit program, i think u contact them through ur local BOCE program or social services, this gives u free child care for a few hours a day or week whatever u need to be able to shop or rest or whatever u want to do it does a world of good, i have used it and it does help>>> i hope this gives u some guidence honey...good luck

Ruks - posted on 12/12/2009

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its normal to feel like dt...especially wen u have no one to giv u a hand...but look at it dis way, u can bring ur child up the way u want wiv no one interfering(cos dts d flip side to having ppl involved wiv ur child)..not saying its easy, u wil hav ur ups n dwns bt its a part of the hard work u putting towards ur baby....

like Janice Sanford sed...keep ur head up, god isnt gna giv u anyfng u cnt deal wiv...b strong if not for urself but for ur baby and always smile....try...and drop me a msg if u wna talk.....hope fngs get better...

Janice - posted on 12/12/2009

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girl you got to put it in gods hands and remember he is not going to piy nothing on you that you cant handle keep ypur head up

Ruth - posted on 12/12/2009

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Yes, i feel that way alot these days as my three children are teenagers. i used to think the toddler stage was hard and even though i was married at the time my husband was NEVER home. Now we are divorced and he seems to have more influence over the kids than ever. nothing i do or say is good enough and today i ran from the house in tears. I couldn't do it anymore i had to leave. since comming home i have not spoken to them instead locking myself in my room distraught over the nastiness they heaped on me today. Single parents have it far tougher than others especially when they have NO support from family. We do a fantastic job with little to no reward...Keep up the good work.

Tashya - posted on 12/11/2009

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Church support groups, Parenting groups, lots of information about local assistance is available online. I finally found a 'Success by six' and Parents as Teachers which helped. A local daycare also has a Mommys day out which is a free program that lets you get at least 4 hours to yourself once in awhile. Be proud and hold your head up high. Women are 'mountains' with a lot of inner strength, just be sure to take care of yourself first. I also have put myself in a time out once in awhile, just to get a 10 minute breather. "Mommy needs a time out right now, I will be back when" ---the big hand is on ___ or when the clock says ___ or I set a timer. I recently (with a 10 year old) have told my child that Mommy 'clocks out at 9pm, unless it is an emergency, do not come out of your room, I am not available'. All just suggestions. Hope you find relief. The human race would not go on if it were not for us, women have been doing this for eons.

Kiana - posted on 12/11/2009

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I don't feel like that way because if I don't do it who will? Their father has proven himself not to be a responsible parent so i'm kinda glad that i had to do it on my own. At least i can instill values and ethics that i know he wouldn't. Better days will come so just stay focused and keep your head up.

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