child support

[deleted account] ( 22 moms have responded )

I live in Maine. My children's father has been on SSI disability for a few years now, he has paid a total of $50.00 child support in the past 5 years. I have been told he is exempt from child support due to his disability. he recently moved to Alaska from Maine. Has anyone ever heard of a father being exempt from child support. Any advice on my thoughts of revoking his parental rights? How hard is it? and how do I find him? I have already googled and called the police in alaska but short of a P-eye I have no idea how to find him to serve him papers... any thoughts will help

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

Let it go is the cheapest way - yes, I think I've heard the disability argument - but I thought they had to pay $50.00 a month was the minimum. Live without it because then you might not need to file anything:
Finding him: you don't have to go through that. Find out what the abandonment law is in your state: just call an attorney's office and say, "Hi, I'm just wondering what is the length of time that constitutes legal child abandonment in our state? Is it two years? Three years? Does that mean no support and no contact for that period of time?" Then - just wait - he probably will meet the criteria and you won't have to find him - just file abandonment in your state.

Tracy - posted on 04/25/2011

62

7

7

Was he court ordered to pay child support? If so, you should contact social security. Usually there is a portion of SSI for dependent kids that can be paid directly to you instead of child support. It is an additional benefit that, I believe, does not affect how much he receives. And yes, if his income is too little, he can be exempt from child support.

Chelsa M - posted on 05/06/2011

55

5

5

first off, can I just say that he sounds pathetic. I'm sorry, but I kind of have the same problem with my son's "father (whom we refer to as Village Idiot).

anyhow, back to the issue at hand:
is the child support court ordered? if it is, then they can garnish his SSI. Village Idiot tried to pull that on me with his unemployment, and they just give me 20% of it, but he has to come up with the other $300-some odd himself. but, then again, I am in California, and California's not too nice to deadbeat dads. as for terminating his rights and trying to find him, call up information, ask for a listing under his name in whatever town he's staying in. if you don't know the town, they can lookup it up by the state. if that doesn't work, bug his family. I watch Dog the Bounty Hunter all the time, and 9 times out of 10 the family knows where they are. if they won't give it up, contact the child support services place in your county/state, open a case, and they'll do the legwork for you. I did that with Village Idiot and didn't know the name of his union or his parents' address, and they found it for me.

Ashley - posted on 04/30/2011

21

26

1

if you do get married to this guy you can always just have him adopt her.....and the rule is this in MN if he does not contact you for 7 yrs the court will grant the guy you choose to adopt her without going to court for her sperm donor to sign over his rights...... .i know this is in mn but maybe youan find out with it is for your state.. im in the same rutt as you exept i know where the "father" is.. i hope all goes well

Kayna - posted on 04/25/2011

12

13

2

That's a lie that the children with SSI parent don't get help or money. I know 3 men on SSI who have children and almost half of their check goes to the kid. You need to reach not SSI but the Child Support office where you are.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

22 Comments

View replies by

Ashley - posted on 05/06/2011

21

26

1

i wouldnt have given him any chance after that.. wow i congradulate you for doing it on your own.. its not easy.

[deleted account]

My children and I were all at the hands of sever physical abuse from their father and what they didn't feel, they saw. I allowed him a visit about 2 years ago, he allowed them to be watched by another person that has been abusive in my life without my consent, would not answer his phone, my son ended back up in diapers, and he called him retarded and said he couldn't handle him (my son is autistic), They are 5 and almost 7 now I have raised them solely for the past 5 years with no financial, emotional, or physical support from anyone other than subsidized housing and Parents as Scholars so I could attend college to become financially independent (I am well on my way to being free of the "welfare" aspect). I also have someone wonderful that may want to adopt them but we will not rush that issue for the sake of the children, as of yet we do not even live together. The bio-dad also has very bad alcohol dependency and substance abuse issues and now that he is not further addressing his problems there is a great chance of relapse. It is in the best interest of my children and their development not to have any contact with their father. 5 years ago I got a PFA against him for me and on behalf of my children, there was a four page report illustrating his abuse and degradation toward me and them, none of which he disputed, as it was all true. He has also killed a cat with a hatchet in my house and used my vehicle (without ever having a license) to run down a rabbit on my lawn. He has ruined 3 of my vehicles in the past. Why did I stay with him? you ask... because I wanted to give him that chance and I did for 4 years and in that time was told, "if you ever call the cops I will have an out date and I will hunt you down and kill your entire family", I asked for help from his parents and was refused. Until at the final straw when he held my son for the first time (at 3 weeks old) away from his body under the arms and when Asher wouldn't stop crying he said, "get this little mother fucker away from me before his life is in danger" just a few of the details in my decision to not give him any more chances.

Bev - posted on 05/06/2011

138

0

0

it occurs to me to wonder if you don't have anyone to adopt why you want to terminate rights...how old is your child? I had no choice due to violence and substance abuse when I terminated but my kids would have loved to get to know their father and I would have allowed it had he changed his path...he is passed now so no change - kids have rights in this as I know you are aware...just curious not really second guessing you

[deleted account]

My state is 5 years, I talked to him online 2 days ago he said he is no longer on SSI but isn't working yet... he is looking I called DHHS and they want me to refile for support then they will find him after that when he gets the bill I think he will change his mind... he said if I have another to adopt he would sign but my bf and I are not to that point yet so I am hoping he will just sign anyway. If not I will file he wont show up and I will get it anyway... hopefully :-) I don't want or need the money just closure I told the bio Dad that and he asked me why we couldn't just get back together! HA!!! not a chance!

Debi - posted on 04/27/2011

130

36

14

NO it would come right out of his SSI check TURN him in let them know he don't pay then it will be taken out of his check or they will send you a seperate check they should be getting something. Did he ever tell them he has kids?

IF he moved to Alaska his checks have to be going someplace have that tracked. ask your laywer what you can do about getting the kids name changed to yours without his permission since he has no contact info and also try AFDC they pay you when the dad wont/cant

Tam - posted on 04/27/2011

107

17

22

I would think that he basically abandoned his children, so go to court and try to get things done. You can always keep checking online thru yellow pages, facebook, myspace. Somebody knows where he is in his family for sure. Best thing for you to do tho is to prove he abandoned them and get the other father to step up and be thier dad. Good Luck. Just do it all through the courts so its legal and binding. Most kids do get checks if parents get SSI.

Bev - posted on 04/26/2011

138

0

0

Contact SS if you have his number - the kids should get a payment off that from SS...my kids got one off mine until their father passed and his survivor's was more so they got that..

[deleted account]

possible go to court and show them that he has left and hasn't been helping out and left no address and with your new man with you tell them he wants to adopt them. I don't see why they wouldnt allow it like this. Hope everything works out for you

[deleted account]

I cant serve him with any papers unless I have his address SSI because of HIPPA won't tell me where he is? I'm in a rut right now. I have a really great guy that wants to adopt them after we get married but if I can't serve him IDK if I can have the courts do anything for me.

[deleted account]

that would be nice... but he probably doesn't file or owes in, i don't want his money anyway I want to know how to find him

[deleted account]

The child support office, DSER is the office that sent the letter that said he was exempt I have talked to SSI and a lawyer about this... And misinformed may be a better work than lie since I don't and what would a lie help me at all. Anyone know how to reach someone in Alaska that is "under the Radar"?

Tracy - posted on 04/25/2011

62

7

7

SSI did not give you the right advice. I know of several parents who get SSI benefits for the kids because the other parent was on SSI. Check again.

[deleted account]

I asked SSI they said the only way the kids get any thing is if he dies... at this point I really just want his rights taken away he has no visitation anyway, just moved to Alaska and I'd like to change their last names to mine

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms