Child Support Blues!

Kamille - posted on 07/04/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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How does child support work, b/c i about as clueless as they cum!? I don't understand at all.....can somebodi please...in lamens terms...explain 2 me..wat its all about! I kno a lil bit but not dat much...do they base it on both income or just one.....am i da only person dat can control it besides my agent....would child visitation b a good thing if me nd their father don't get along....nd everything else unda da sun....HELP ME!!

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Candice - posted on 07/08/2009

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depends on where you live. i'm in canada, so not sure if this will help. but here goes:



child support and custody/access are different issues, first of all.



in canada, you cannot stop the other parent from seeing the child even if they pay no support. here it's based on the father's income only. we have government guidelines as to what they should pay based on how many children, where they live, and how much they make. the government assumes that every parent would pay the same percentage of their income on their child (ex: a father making 20,000 would pay say 10% of his income on his child, and a father making 40,000 would pay 10% as well...of course 10% of 40,000 is much more)



as for custody and access:



full custody means one parent gets rights to make decisions about the child regarding school, religion, etc. Joint custody means both parents make decisions.



custody has nothing to do with who spends more time with the child. that's called Access. usually, however, the parent with full custody has more access. but joint custody doesn't necessarily mean both parents see the child equally. note: they don't recommend joint custody if parents can't work together, because it means you have to agree on decisions about your child.



if you and the father don't get along, it's not a reason to stop your child from having visits (access). learn to control yourself, keep conversations short and to the point, don't engage in fighting. but the father has rights to see the child, and unless you can prove reasons why he is a danger to her, the courts will enforce those rights.



there are different kinds of visitation by the way (or access). supervised access is an option if you think he may be a danger to your child. this means he can only see the child while someone else is in the room with them. this could be a family member you trust, or someone else.



otherwise, visitation is usually unsepervised. if you can come up with a plan with the father on how often he will see his child (every second weekend, or every tuesday and thursday for 3 hours, or whatever) then do it. otherwise a court will decide. my ex has what is called "reasonable access". he can see her whenever he wants, and we come up with a schedule between ourselves. he works strange shifts so "every second weekend" wouldn't work for him, and i want my daughter to see her father, even if he and i don't get along.

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Kamille - posted on 07/08/2009

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Thanx 4 da advice Candice, i appreciate that nd that's actually startin' 2 seem like a good idea!

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