Ana - posted on 03/30/2012 ( 8 moms have responded )
I have 2 kids with this person, they are 14 & 12, they don't see their "father" as he could care less, his excuses were always "I don't have the gas money" (he moved 3hrs away from them about 8yrs ago. Every year that he does his taxes he claims the kids which he does not have the right to do so, so because he gets that money off of them every year he takes me to court (it's the only time he does it is around tax time), nothing really came of it until last year the family commissioner made a date for him to see them and said either we figure something out then or he take me back to court. The day that he had that visitation date, I sat out there until the kids were done and when they were the kids said to me "He said he's taking you back to court". He used to do his so called visitation by showing up at the kids school (when he had the gas money) and having them taken out of class to visit with them, for some strange reason he had this worked out with the principal to do this, I thought it was wrong and said something and then it stopped, We moved, the kids then went to a different school, he tried it again there and they said no, they can only be taken out of class for emergencies, that made him mad, So anyway while he was doing this my daughter would tell me when they got home and she said that he would always ask about me and what's going on with me and that he working on getting the money to take me to court and also telling me them that we should get back together so we can be a happy family again, first of all I can't stand him, I despise him and I literally get physically sick having to be around him (a therapist said it was PTSD and that he's a trigger. He has done many things to me and the kids in the past and all I am trying to do is protect them. I have tried to tell people in the past and no one ever listened or helped, I have lost all faith in the PD/law/courts). So today I looked on the court site and it showed that he is trying to take me to court again, the thing is it was closed for some reason and the way that it was worded is that I filed the papers and I was taking him to court, I NEVER did any of that, I have no money to take anyone to court or do anything and also because I'm trying to keep low and quite and hope nothing happens. It shows it as my daughters name vs. him, which doesn't make any sense and also shows that he has a lawyer, now I'm scared and don't know what to do (I can't afford a lawyer because I have a disability and have a fixed income). He is mentally unstable (no I'm not saying that because I don't like him), his whole family has mental issues, his mother has been arrested numerous times and put into a mental facilities, none of them think straight (another mistake I made). He was arrested too for coming into my home with 2 shotguns, then he was taken to a mental facility too. He has made claims in the past that I am trying to control him and his money and/or telling the courts that if he doesn't give me money that I won't allow him to see the kids which is a total lie, yes I don't want him around the kids but I would NEVER say that as I know how much trouble that would get me into. He would write letters, take it to the school to give to the kids to give to me and say that "we have had many disagreements and he is trying to put it all behind him", I don't understand where he's coming up with this because I have NO contact with him in any way shape or from, I have my address and phone number hidden from him and have a order of protection of privacy with the child support office so he doesn't get my info, I worry that him or his family members would start something if they knew my address and number as they have in the past and have also gone to my parents home to find me, I am very scared of this person and others around him. Anyway I tried last year to get a lawyer for free but all I ever get is, "sorry can't help you", how in the world can I do this if I can't afford a lawyer!? How can I protect me kids, my daughter cries and tells me that she has nightmares that he is beating her up! (he has physically abused them in the past), He can afford a lawyer not only because he commits fraud with the IRS to get that money to do this but also because he lives with his mother and has NO real life expenses. He has never lived on his own and doesnt know what its like to have rent and bills to pay for. He doesn't even follow the court order on getting them insurance and paying half of the medical. He tells me that's what CS is for.
UGH, I'm so sorry for rambling but now I'm scared, I'm scared now that there is a lawyer because now I have no say. I know that it's not all him doing this alone, he has others pushing him. There's this woman that lives about 30min south of me that thinks that shes the boss of everyone and shes just a family friend of theirs and she took his mother to court years ago and took her 2 youngest kids away, I'm scared this this is going to be another case of her doing this, she thinks she has a right to be in others business and if u don't allow it or do it you better watch out. I'm so scared, I don't know what to do and no one will help. Sorry for the misspellings and on and on.