how do you deal with being a teen mom and life at the same time

Whyttney - posted on 01/05/2011 ( 9 moms have responded )

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im a mother of a 8month old and life isnt hard but it isnt easy! how do some of you teens deal with being a mom need some advice

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JuLeah - posted on 02/13/2011

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I would guess like any mom deals with being a mom and wiht life. Big changes and it can be hard. In this country not that long ago, teen moms were the norm. Kids got married at 16 or 17. In many countries they still do, even younger.
Of course 'teenager' didn't exist back then. "teen" was a concept invented by Disney in the 1950's. The whole notion of teenager is a manmade concept and one you don't have to buy into if ya don't want.

Stacey - posted on 02/12/2011

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I have a daughter who is turning 8 months soon and I do feel your pain. It's hard being a single mom and finding time for yourself. A ton of my "friends" did the same thing too me, even my friend who had a baby 2 weeks after I did. Lucky my mom watches my daughter so i can have a night out with the few friends that did stay. Of course I still get down in the dumps cause I cant go out with my friends like I use too.
I just do a little bit of self pampering, it works like a charm everytime. If you are looking for new friends always try baby and I classes they are a great place too meet new people and a great support system.

Ashleigh Jade - posted on 02/11/2011

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I am 21 with 3 kids so i completely understand , the best piece of advice i can give is focus on your self and your kid, take time out for you or you will burn out,enjoy the time you spend with your child and just love being a mum.

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While I am no longer a teen mom, the best advice that I can offer you is to keep your social life balanced with your family life! I know that at times it may be hard, but finding a way to balance the two equally will keep you happier and less stressed.

Whyttney - posted on 01/06/2011

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@berryessa i totally know how u feel im a single parent to im 19 and i try to stay busy to not think about the negative. there are so moany emotions we as mothers go threw its just so hard on me because i have noone really to talk to but ma bestfriend and she doesnt have kids so in all honesty she doesnt know what i go threw on the daily...

Whyttney - posted on 01/06/2011

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thank you!yes i dont wannna have red=grets about what i did and didnt do for him.and its hard not having anyone to relate to what you going threw

JuLeah - posted on 01/06/2011

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(not a teen)
Well, I am not sure how old you are, but I will say you deal as all other moms' deal. It isnt easy! It is a lot to juggle, handle, sort out. Make sure you have support, faith based maybe, strong community, positive friends, family.
Many new parents lose find that friends drop off ater the baby comes becuase their friends without kids can't relate anymore.
Ya may need to find new friends.
In many countries around the world, women become moms' by the age of 16 or so. It used to be a typlical age here in this country.
The concept of 'teen' was created in this country, not that long agao, as a marketing tool to sell goods - we tend to forget that.
Most teen moms' (or dads) that I know talk mostly about how lonely it is. They have lost their community of friends. So, again, reach out to other mothers, volunteer (good way to make friends, help others, and it often leads to a good job) join community projects, and make sure, above all else, that you finish school and go to college.
Go to the library and check out this book "Women Who Light the Dark"
It is a book about women who have changed their community, their lives, the world even under impossible conditions.
If you can't find that one, read any of the dozens of others - women as young as 15 changing the world with their ideas, actions, drive, spirit .... good luck

Berryessa - posted on 01/06/2011

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I got pregnant at 19 im 20 now and my daughters 4 months old. I lost basically all of my friends and her father left me during my 3rd trimester. Its hard because i went from a life of partying all day everyday to staying home with my lil girl while everyone started to disappear from my life. However I knew i wanted to be the best mommy i could be so most of my time is spent with her. Honestly its not easy emotionally for me because i hate that her dad is with someone else but there a rare moment in the day where i get a break so i never really have time to think about it

Nikki - posted on 01/05/2011

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I was a teen mother and it's very difficult in many regards. My biggest piece of advice is to focus on your child and be the best Mom you can be and still take some time for yourself . I say this because I can't get the years back where my child bonded with my mother more so than me and it haunted she and I both forever. At 42 , I now see what is really important in life and it is your children :) If I could go back , I would ensure my child was with me a lot more than what she was :( I can never get that time back so i always tell other teen moms to think about that as I have lived long enough now to see the mistakes I made . It is hard to deal with and life changes for you so much but your child is with you forever with love for you :) God Bless and good luck !!

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