How to calm my daughter when she's crying for her daddy..

Lilly - posted on 12/05/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

6

5

0

So today my 22month old found a pic of her daddy and wanted to walk out the door to go find him..
Crying hysterically I had to call him, which was just the voicemail. And yeah he called back which had her crying more... I didn't think I'd have to see this type of reaction from her for some time at least a couple years from now.. He sees her maybe 2x a month for a couple of hours , I don't mention him, don't keep pic around the house, ..(at least I thought i didn't) Whenever he comes I don't let her know for fear of disappointment his visits are a 'surprise' for her. Any suggestions what to do next time she has a daddy fit..

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

5 Comments

View replies by

Jenn - posted on 12/09/2009

1

21

0

I let my girls call their dad whenever they want. It's been about a year now of us seperating and I still get the questions of when mommy and daddy are going to be back together and why dont mommy and daddy get along. He doesnt do the same, just tells them they will see mommy soon, but i chose to be the better/bigger person. i just remember it is not about the mom or dad. It's about the kids

Angie - posted on 12/09/2009

12

8

1

try a build-a-bear. you know the ones you can leave a voice message. it will be her's and her's alone, and she can hear his voice whenever she wants..hope it works for you. Mine are older, but the miss there dad too, i know its hard..

Suzanne - posted on 12/06/2009

4

11

0

"Surprises" aren't good, there is no consistancy. If that's all the time she is going to get, maybe it's better for her to not see him at all. I see it as her heart being ripped apart for a few hours of security and then to leave her even more confused and hurt that he has left "again". Play therapy?

Kimberly - posted on 12/06/2009

21

4

4

When my boys' father and I split, my 2 year old was confused and kept asking for his dad to come home or to sit in the car with us. Just keep a brave face on even though it probably breaks your heart. I tell my son "Daddy isn't coming over now, but we can call him later!" That normally helps. Sadly, now he never asks for his daddy, but he does ask for me when he is with his dad. Time will help heal things, and you just need to stay strong in front of your daughter when she is upset. And like the post above me, give her tons of love when her dad leaves or when they hang up the phone.

Terrayne - posted on 12/06/2009

1

2

1

Hi. As hard as this was at the time, I kept pictures of my girl's dad in her room. I also told her that it was ok to miss her daddy. This made things a little bit easier for her. It didn't stop the 'I want daddy' thing but it cut it down. My girl is now 7. Her father and I are getting along a lot better now. One thing that helped is that there is an understanding that our girl can call her dad anytime she wants to - even it means leaving a message. Yes, it's hard - especially when there are no return calls for a while.I understand where you are coming from in regards to the not telling about dad's visit. As I don't know what you're situation is like, I can only let you know what I have done. Oh yeah and when she and dad have finished their time together, lots of hugs and cuddles. I used to cry a lot when my girl cried too...I couldn't help it. Stay strong, stay loving.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms