if there is any single mommies out there drop me a note so i dont feel alone

Lisa - posted on 05/10/2010

Hi Brandy,i am a sinle mother of one,my son john is 4 years old,when i was potty training john,i use to bring the potty out into the lounge room and encourage him to sit on it as much as i could um also there is books that you can buy,fun stories about potty training as i bought one from Big W.

Erin - posted on 05/08/2010

my daughter is almost three as well. we take a music class together ,she seems to really enjoy the maracas and earthly instruments, hand drums , rain sticks ect. and singing either her own word , as many she knows to the songs or humming along to littlle songs or chants.....

Margaret - posted on 05/07/2010

here is the part of the long Potty Time video specifically for boys & includes washing hands. The longer version is good too and sings songs like She's A Super Duper Pooper:) Has stuff about wiping etc.

Margaret - posted on 05/07/2010

Dorothy - posted on 05/07/2010

take him to the potty a couple of times a day and let them sit awhile especially after they eat. and some times u just have to leave them alone and they will go on their on. they have birth to three programs that is really go with speech and after three they can recommend other places. like their schools that is school.

Kristi - posted on 05/07/2010

i am also a singfle mom n have been one since my daughter was born she is 2 i also have nt mastered potty traing bt i am working on it try books n they have a cd thats called babys can read an its really good

Nolene - posted on 05/07/2010

Hi there, your son will tell/show you when he is ready for it - any advice i can give is do not pressure him. Put the potty there with the lid up and at some stage his curiosity will get the better of him and he will go and sit down - the same with toilet training. Let him do it when he is ready. Also if he goes to a nursery school and he see's the other kids doing it it will make it will make the process easier and quicker. Good luck :-)

Anja - posted on 05/06/2010

cant really give any potty training advice both of my sons(now 8 and 13) started really early and took loooong to be potty trained it seemed like forever...what i would do now is get a potty let him sit on it ..praise if he pees but be calm if he doesnt..letting him walk around without a diaper works for a lot of people...somebody told me once that while it is so frustrating eventually everybody managed on their own terms....as far as speech i would try singing to him....

Cass - posted on 05/06/2010

I am in a similar boat. Rough year and 2 young boys a dad that won't help expenses unless I submit a receipt to him :o(
Potty training with my oldest was a really a matter of organization. I got him a potty chart, jelly beans (cause they disappear quick), a musical potty seat, and the cheapest diapers around so he felt the wetness. I had him sit down so we didn't deal with the pointing of the tool in the bowl at first. That came much later.
It took a month or more and he wore a pull-up at night.
Regarding his speech check out asha.org...to little info to go on. When I points you say "oh you want the ____" before giving it to him. If all he has to do is point or gesture to get things then he has no reason to talk. I gave my son a few signs (american sign language) at age 10 months and he could say "more", "milk" and "eat" before he spoke the words.
Hang in there

Gracie - posted on 05/06/2010

hi! im gracie and im a single mom for 12yrs now...how old is your son?if he's over 2yrs and still doesn't talk much, u may bring him to a developmental pediatrician.im thinking u give him lots of encouragement but flash cards with picture names would also help.read to him often too! i had no problems potty training my son...i think i how i did it too coz it had been more than a decade now.currently, im facing problems with raising a pre-teen boy.but motherhood is such a joy that small sacrifices (and even big) would just pass by like there's nothing to it.it brings so much joy and happiness! good luck!

Connie - posted on 05/05/2010

My son was very hard to potty train as well, I am a single mom too. what made my son finally potty train was the fact that I made it a game....lol sounds funny but it worked.....I put two or three cheerios in the toilet water, and told him to aim for the cherrios....every time he hit the cherrios he got a sticker, and 10 stickers led to an awesome reward of his choice. maybe his favorite snacks or fun time with mom or a special visit with grandma. I combined that with buying him big boys underwear that he chose out himself with his favorite super hero. I told him not to pee or poo on spiderman or he would make spiderman sick and he could not wear spiderman till he was well again(washed) he did not want to make his super hero sick. My boy loved it, and was fully potty trained with in two weeks.

Julie - posted on 05/05/2010

I have a 5 year old son.. Potty training was not too much of a challenge but my Aunt ( mom of 4 grown boys now) gave me a few tips... Potty Chair in front of TV and give them water, juice tea whatever and let them run around the house with no bottoms on at first then put big boy pants on after you see they are getting the hang of it ect ect... The other thing I did as well was buy him a kids friendly "tape" or Mp3 player playskool has a really neat one and some kids songs.. and let them listen to it only when they are sitting on the potty..

as for the speech issues... My son also had those as well .. by the time he was 2 he did not say more than 5 words.. The Dr told me that he should be saying 10-20. He recommended Speech classes.. We have a wonderful program near us that is a state program that came to the house 2-3 times a week and worked on speech and then when he turned three the school district took over and worked with him.. by the time he turned 4 he no longer needed it.. It also helps if you have him in some kind of preschool where he can see other kids and how they communicate with speech...

It worked for us ...

Cristy - posted on 05/05/2010

Hi! I'm a single mom too. I have no idea about potty training, my son has no ingerest and I don't want to force it. He is very much a talker, though. I have always talked to him through the day, even before he could answer, I'd pause like he could, then answer for him. Now he narrates what is happening through the day, tells me what he wants or feels, and even tells stories, at two and a half! I think just keeping running dialoge helps with speech a lot.

Dene - posted on 05/05/2010

I have been a single mom for 2yrs. now, although many would say I was a single parent for the even 12 yrs. I was w/ my ex-husband. I have 3 children, ranging from 14-almost 4yrs. old. W/ my oldest(son), I would put him on the pot when he woke up in the morning, after each meal, & right before bedtime. Whenever he would go, I would make a big deal, by screaming "YEAH," high-fiving him, & giving him a big hug. He would always be so eager to go the next time, because he loved my response! With my 2nd son, it was a little more challenging, because he just wasn't as interested. W/ him, I had to put his pot wherever he was, just so he would be more inclined to go. It definitely took a lot longer for him to train than my oldest. My daughter was just as stubborn as my middle child! As for the speech, I've never been a fan of the so-called, "baby talk." I always spoke proper English to my children...I would just speak it in a higher pitched voice, w/ a lot of inflection, & smiles. Everyone was always so impressed w/ how well my children spoke, even at a young age. If someone spoke to my children in baby talk, I would tell them not to do that. I also, surrounded my kids w/ many learning toys. I made everday talk a learning lesson. I sang the spelling of their names to them during potty time, & would always ask what color something was, or how many of something there were, like, "What color is that ball?," "Give me the red book," or "How many toys are on the floor?" Of course they don't know, but I would supply the answer. They all knew how to spell their name when they turned 2. They learned all their colors w/in the same year, could count to 20, & could count items up to 20! You & your son will be fine, just keep working w/ him, & don't get frustrated! Each child learns at their own speed. As long as you share your concerns w/ his doctor, & both of you keep track of his progress, everything will work out just fine!

Heather - posted on 05/05/2010

i notice when my son was little he would have a accident whenever he was haviing to much fun and didnt want to come in the house to pee so i told him he could just find a tree he loved being able to pee outside and potty training became easy. the only downfall i had was when he was five we came out of hogans jewelers and this is down town gaylord where they have a few trees planted on main street he had to pee and as i climbed in my side of the car i looked in the rear view to see my son peeing on a tree down town it was so funny i then explained he needed to make sure no one else could see him.

Sina - posted on 05/05/2010

Hi Brandy! Ive been an solo mum for 6yrs now and i wouldnt have it any other way! I have a 6yr old girl and a 2yr old boy, im starting to potty train too..So the 1st thing is to see if ur son's ready to be trained.If he's showing signs then try and encourage him, but if not dont rush it.He'll go in is own time. As for the speech part, Mine still mumbles, but i also try and talk to him as an adult, and not baby talk...Ive done it with bth kids and noticed it works very well! He may look at you like wat r u talking about, but over time he'll get the hang of it and probly try n mimic ur words.As for toys, i find boys are easy to entertain. They dont need Flash expensive toys, they are so hippo and like to get dirty and play with anything , so good luck and best wishes! :)

Julie - posted on 05/04/2010

I bought a little gumball machine for my son. (You can fill it with m&m's or other small candies). I know my son was more excited about getting his own reward, than do a silly song and dance.
He was so stubborn this was my last hope. I showed him how it worked; put the penny in, push the level, get the treat. And then explained to him every time he went in the potty he got to get his own treat. Within 2 weeks, he was potty trained and could care less about the treat anymore.
Good luck! It can be hard. But I would advise, don't force him. It will only make it worse. And being that when and how they go to the bathroom is one of the only things they have complete control over, you don't want to make it a battle.

Carrie - posted on 05/04/2010

I'm another single mommy... you aren't alone! Potty training for boys... well that was a while ago but when my son was little (8 months or so) before every bath/shower I'd put him on the potty. If he tinkled I clapped and cheered and said he was such a big boy. He was about 27 months when we tried the first time and used pull-ups (huge waste of time and money in my opinion) Waited til he was about 2 years 7 months... went camping but before we left for our trip we stopped and picked up some big boy undies. While camping I set a timer and every hour I took him in to "try" to go potty. An accident here or there but after the week was done... We were done with diapers!!

As for speech... if he is 18 months - 3 years contact the Elks association they provide that age group with speech due to the fact they understand if a child has issues speaking they will have issues wit behavior and reading. If older than 3 contact school district they are suppose to start providing speech therapy at the age of 3.

Brea - posted on 05/04/2010

contact First Steps or the Government agency where you like First Steps. They will evaluate him for speech therapy. Very Affordable.

Brandy - posted on 05/03/2010

Thanks ladies all the ideas are very helpful and i will try them.

Joanna - posted on 05/03/2010

He may not tell you what his wants and needs are but there are clues that you maybe missing. Like tugging on the diaper, going to the place where he is changed offten, sometimes will go to a hiding spot for privacy to poop and sometimes an occaictional words you may have missed.

Nikki - posted on 05/03/2010

hi im nikki i am a single mom of six what would you like to know if i can help you

Qiana - posted on 05/03/2010

Just put him on the potty with a snack or a juice and sit him front of his favorite t.v show.

Lize - posted on 05/03/2010

Hi! I'm a single mom of 2 boys (aged 2 and 4). Been single since Nov 2008!! You're welcome to mail me on FB.

Shamilla - posted on 05/03/2010

Hi I have been a single mum for the past 6 six years, have two teenage daughters and my little boy who is six is a downs kid, Should say I didnt worry too much about potty training, nature took its course, Kevash is growing up a very independent young lad.

KEYANA - posted on 05/02/2010

elmo...bob the builder...diego...action figures{batman, iron man, spiderman, etc}

Brandy - posted on 05/02/2010

thanks Tanya that reasures me alot and now i don't feel alone cause i have great people like you to talk to so thanks again

Tanya - posted on 05/02/2010

when I toilet trained my son I always threw a cheerio or a goldfish cracker or even a piece of bread when I didn't have other things and turned it into a game for him. He loved it and learned so fast. also it depends on his age, some kids aren;t ready yet. My daughter is 22 months now and she's not ready for toilet training yet. She also isn't talking much at all and has not said a sentence at all yet. Just hang in there, the most important thing you can do for him is meet his basic needs and show him love love love the rest will come when he's ready. keep your head up. Being a single mom is hard. I'm a single mom of 3 and it's very very hard, but I just thank God everyday for his blessings and ask for strangth and guidance. My problem was always I thought I needed a man in my life and it always got me hurt in the end. It costed me also, and when things cost me they cost my children too. I've finally built myself a support system of friends and family and am not concerned with a man. Hang in there. It will get better. Things get easier.

Robin - posted on 05/02/2010

This might sound bad but I had to potty train my boy by letting him run around the house with no pants and no diaper I noticed that when he had clothes on he allways forgot but when he had no clothes on if he forgot I allways knew with little boys they tend to stick out more when they have to pee after a while of me saying he had to go he would notice it himself but I had to strip him down LOL but it worked

Mary - posted on 05/02/2010

Dear Brandy,
Hi, I'm Mary. When I was trying to train my son for potty training we tried a ton of different things. What worked for us was using Cheerio's thrown in the toilet to shoot at. It helps improve aim and gets them excited about going to try and shoot at them. We also offered a lot of praise when he would use the potty and asked how many he shot down. Just an idea you could try.
Try not to get down about being a single mom. Some days are tougher than other days. But the best part is when your child snuggles up to you and says "I love you mommy!" You can feel the strength it gives you and the pride. Hang in there.
Mary

Colleen - posted on 05/01/2010

One thing I would highly recommend is doing ASL with him. My son is 16 months old and has an extensive vocabulary of over 200 words. Reading to them is key as well. In the past month or so my son has started helping me read his books! He also knows the tittles of most of his books (and believe me he has TONS). Look at http://www.signingtime.com. I found the videos at my local library that I check out so it's totally free. Another helpful website is http://www.signingsavvy.com, you can search words and they show you a little clip of what the sign looks like. Babies learn by watching and listening to Mama as well, so talk to him...explain everything that you are doing. Dress up some dolls or stuffed animals and have him undress and redress them. Encourage roll playing, my son will take his stuffed animals and put them on the potty and make a pee sound (psssssss)...ask him to act like a kitty/dog/cow...etc and you do it along with him. When ever he is playing with something ask him what color it is and say (for example: "look, you are playing with your red block, it's a pretty red block").

Also, don't know where you live, but look into Healthy Start, they have free social workers that will come to your house and give you tips and all kinds of developmental activities to do with your child. Also, check out your local library they may have story times for your LO, or most communities have playgroups you can join.

I hope this helps. GOOD LUCK MAMA!

Christal - posted on 05/01/2010

for the potty training thing i use my brothers if there is a male friend that you trust get him to take him to the potty because they learn by seeing my son is 1 and my brothers have been doing that since he was about 7 months so he knows a little bit. my son has seizures to so i understand about the talking thing i just speak to him very very slowly he tends to understand better and trys to speak back.

Elizabeth - posted on 05/01/2010

I'm a single mom of a girl but she is under a year. Sorry if i can't be of much help. I do know single moms of toddlers too. There are those little things you put in the toilet for him to aim at and you can train him sitting down on a little potty 1st. My nephew was trained that way 1st. I just read in a magazine to have a u shaped toilet seat because i guess the toilet seat if slammed down can hurt the little boys private area. I think it was American Baby i read it in just today actually. My niece doesn't talk really at all and she is over 2. They talk when they are ready. You can't really force them to. You can repeat things or not give in to the point and whine which is what my niece does. She is learning to talk though.

Morgan - posted on 04/30/2010

Put a ping pong ball in the toilet and get him to pee on it. A fun game that works :)

Belinda - posted on 04/30/2010

My son speaks pretty good for two beause i make it appoint to speak to him in a regular tone voice and also interact with other kids that can speak. Same for potty training i allowed him to see my male friend use the restroom and againonce one child has to go potty they all mimick and have to potty. Once i knew he understood the difference of using the potty and going to his diaper i began to enforce him using the potty.

April - posted on 04/30/2010

i am a single mom and during my marriage to my ex he was never at home so i taught our boys how to potty train by making them squat to potty just as a female does.. as they got older and was able to understand what they were doing, they figured out how they were suppose to do it....

Laura - posted on 04/30/2010

hi, ive been on my own since i was pregnant, my son is 5 now, boys are tricky to potty train, just let him go at his own pace he will get there. as for the speech just talk to him and read to him he will pick it up, dont try to rush him with things i find it doesnt help, sound cards are good my son used to use them . hope it helps x

Peggy - posted on 04/30/2010

Im a single mom of 9 kids 7 boys 2 girls lol its easy to train boys find a farmers almanac and when the sign is going from the feet back to the head in a 4 day cycle put them in regular little underwear and take them potty every 1 or so for the first day stand them up and show them how it works lol boys r different than girls by a long shot no pun intended and as for the best toy i dont think there is one out there lol my kids liked the boxes the toys came in better than the actual toy lol best is to just ur imgination take root 3 yr olds love to play make believe provide the props and let them interact with others their age enroll ur son in the local headstart or another preskool if its thru a school u can recieve special services for him free or little charge thanks for ur time hope this helps u out have a great summer with ur little one before u know it hell be wanting the car keys lol

Tasha - posted on 04/30/2010

well my son had a hard time with talking.. Just talk to him more, read, and when you talk do it slow so he can see the shapes ofyour mouth. For potty training use things like time out. But he has to do time out in the wet clothing for how ever old he is. If he is two then two minutes. You have to learn to teach yuorself to take him to the bathrook often. Get a timer and set it for 30 mintues and each time it goes off just take him to the bathroom. After you take him reset it and do it again. It is not easy but as a single mom you have to have patiences and if you dont have some get some espeically since you are a single mother!

Iyesha - posted on 04/29/2010

i found it easy to potty traing my son by putting cherrios in the toilet and telling him to aim at it and by sitting him on it 5 minutes after every drink. depending on age i go with toys that make noise with lights. read him the same book over and over for a week explain the animals or objects in the book after that week try to point to the picture and ask him what it is.....hopefully these tips will help u they have truly helped me

Kelli - posted on 04/29/2010

single mom of 2 a 14 year old girl and 13 year old boy been doing it alone for 9 years... takes strong people to do what we single moms do...

Kelli - posted on 04/29/2010

he will do it when he is ready my son was almost 3 and a half before he was potty trained, dont be so hard on yourself, speech is also something i have had to deal with he will progress and in school there is plenty of help my son had speech therapy until he was in 4th grade and he speaks perfect today.. keep your head up mom

Ashley - posted on 04/29/2010

hi my son is two and i play word games with him sit on the couch and make shure he can see u talk if he says mom say mom let him repeat it and keep going with the words he nows than find a word that starts with m like lilk thats a hard one because thye k but just talk slow and prenounce all the letters slowly this has helped a lot like your son mine is a bit slow verbaly but he's picking up words alot now i do that in the car to good luck hope this helps.

Dominique - posted on 04/29/2010

Hi Brandy,
I am a single mother of two of my own boys and I also take care of my nephew who lives with me. My oldest son was also dev. delayed. I am not sure what area you are in but I'm in washington and there is a place called kindering center and they can evaluate your son. Then if he qualifies they can get him speech therapy for free, so he is ready for school. I sure they have other places in other states that help with special needs as well. With potty training I have learned having all boys in my house that they are all different with potty training but mostly you just want to make it fun and special for them so they want to do it and clap and celebrate and when they are older and are still potty training you can add a reward if needed. ;)

Jessica - posted on 04/29/2010

Hey Brandy!
lets keep in touch... and laurie the cheerios are workin like a charm hahaha..

Paula - posted on 04/29/2010

ive been a single mom forever things r sometimes tough my son has asthma really bad he has attacks 2-4 times a week when the pollin is high i have to be careful with that kinda thing but when i was potty training i sent him to the bathroom with my roomies boys she had 2 that were a lil older so he saw the big boy thing with them and wanted to pee like them he was 3 before he was fully trained it was nice to have another single mom around for the support when he was younger i still need the support sometimes so i call her

Laurie - posted on 04/28/2010

I did the cheerios in the potty to get my son trained. Pour a hand full in and tell him to shoot them with his pee pee. It took a while, but it worked LOL. Also they best toy I found for my son was "Chuck the talking dump truck" fisher price. My son had speach issues too but Chuck helped and once in kindergarten he entered speech therapy. It will get better. I promise!! Enjoy these times no matter what, they go soooo quickly. Good luck!!

Brandy - posted on 04/28/2010

Thanks Jessica and Shannon i talk to my son all the time he understands me but he has had a rough start in life he was in NICU for three weeks he has seizures they are what they call drop seizures so it has slowed alot of things down developmentally but he has alot of people that r helping him right now. he has been free of his seizures for 4 months now so things are good in that part but i has slowed him down quite a bit it will take a bit longer for him to catch up. He is two going to be three on July the 31st . thanks for the help ladies

Shannon - posted on 04/28/2010

Hi Brandy,

I've been doing it alone since I got pregnant, my son is mine and only mine and I am perfectly happy with the way things are! :o) We haven't had much potty training success yet but he is only 22 months so I'm not rushing it. As for the talking I agree with Jessica, I also never baby talked to my son. He is not a perfect talker yet but as mastered quite a bit already! He loves books and we look through them together and he will point out pictures and tell me what things are. This is a good way to teach and encourage him. Find some books with lots of pictures like an alphabet book or sesame street has a cute one or one with animals and go through it with him pointing stuff out to him and eventually he will be the one pointing it out to you! Good luck, and remember you are not alone!

Jessica - posted on 04/28/2010

hey woman how old is ur son? my is 2 and i have been single mom for a year now.. im in the same boat as u are trying to potty train my son talks perfectly cuz i speak to him as an adult not a a goo goo gaa gaa language.. also there is this tag jr book thing i bought my son for xmas omg hes learned so much from it.. like colors songs counting abcs animal sounds like sooo much so try getting ur child the tag jr and some books.. also i put cheerios in the toliet and tell him shoot them sooo try that and when he goes go in the potty make a big deal about it give him a surpirse for it... i have a surpirse basket he gets to pick something outta it everyday that he dont have an accident.. just a bunch of random dollar store stuff like stickers and candies and lil game thingys and kinder surprises try that woman...