Is it too early to talk about sex with your nine year old daughter?

Laura - posted on 08/05/2009

Must be all the peer pressure these days. It didn't happen back in my day when I was 9. What shows is she watching? I'd monitor it if you don't like it. Or start the sex talk, and now. Sit her down and ask her what she knows about it first. Then go from there. I didn't know there was kissing and dating shows for around her age, and what is she doing watching sexy movies? Makes me wonder...

Lisa - posted on 08/05/2009

Some girls can get their periods as early as 9, so you need to give her enough information about what they are and why she has them for her to understand. With both my daughters and my youngest is I have spoken to them very casually and very gradually about sex. I have started with what they need to know at what aged, complimented by School. By High School she needs to know it all, but now she doesn't really need to know about how the baby gets fertilised just about the blood in the womb and why it is there. Answer questions to the best of your ability and don't make a big deal of it, make it casual.

Ciara - posted on 08/05/2009

My son is 8 and we've already started the sex talk, I dont think it's too early to start talking to your daughter about sex, I was a 14 yr old mother and I never had that talk with my family. Basically start off by asking what she already knows and if she feels comfortable talking to you about it now and go from there. Best of luck!

Christina - posted on 08/05/2009

Hi I have a 8 year old girl . what clothes that are for 9 year old that she can get to if you buying them? You should tell her and her friends that these are a little too much for pretty little girls to wear and it does not look nice on them cause they trying to gorw up to fast. You have to keep your eye on everything she does , how she talks, what kind of kids she hags around . Good luck just talk to her .

Michele - posted on 08/04/2009

Hello,


It isn't to young to start talking to your child about sex especially in this day and age. Your child has been exposed to sex through t.v, school and her freinds.Let her get the information from you. Have a girl day out you know the pedi and mani. and let her do the talking I. believe that a frank and open conversation with your daughter will not only enlighten you but her as well. She will be questioning herself about her sexulaity and many old fashion parents will just hand their daughter the little red book. I got one when Iwas a child many years ago and was confused about my cycle and what it meant to my body. If you are not ready to discuss sex with her she will not come to you when something important has happened in her life. I believe Frank Open conversation will lead to a better relationship with your daughter later on in life. Let her know that her body is changing and those changes are for the good. encourage a health body image and strong sense of self. You will be surprise how much she would appreciate you listening to her and her fears.

Danielle - posted on 08/03/2009

I think that it's a great idea to have "the talk" as soon as they show interest or curiosity. It's better for them to learn it from you, and what is and is not acceptable rather than learning what the t.v. has to say about it! This way you also know exactly what information she is being fed. Be sure to explain it in a way that is appropriate for her age level though, and stick to the facts. :D

Brandy - posted on 08/03/2009

If she is in the least bit curious, you should have the talk no matter what age. You just need to gear the information to her age and maturity level. If you are not telling her what she wants to know, someone else will and may give her the wrong information. Kids talk to kids and some actually believe that things like peeing right after sex will keep them from getting pregnant.

Kerri - posted on 08/02/2009

You should go ahead and talk to her. I'd help her pick out clothes that are flattering but not revealing- and let her know where your familys morals are. What's ok and what's not. I volenteer as a girl scout leader- and you can't begin to imagine how much there kids know. But encourage an open dialogue. And keep your standards for her behavior high. If she knows how to dress and whats ok for each age- when she can date/ ect it will get easier. No push to decide that now though.

Alicia - posted on 08/02/2009

I can tell you from my experience that you need to be open with them. I had that talk with my daughter last year at age 9. She heard some info from a friend that was older & she came and asked me. I was very careful to chose the right words & not to detail it too much. She went to a christian school till 3rd grade so that was a blessing. You have to create a trusting relationship and be prepare to her things you may not be ready for. But at least they will come to you with the questions and therefore recieve the right answers. Unfortunately in todays world there is not much for us to do but give them the right info before someone else gives them the wrong one. But most of all know who your kids hang around with it makes a world of difference.

Jo Ann - posted on 07/31/2009

The sooner the better..I work at clinic and we have 12 yr olds come in and already having sex. Just tell her about her body and how important it is. My daughter is 12 and she signed a purity card to remain a virgin till marriage. They had a class at school in 5th grade of course the parents have to sign a permission slip for the students to attend. The more open you are with your daughter the better relattionship she will have with you during peer pressure times. Im a mothere of 4 daughters 23,21,17 and 12. I talked to all of them about this at an early age . I would suggest to read a book go to library and see the many books on how to talk to them.



Wish you the best of luck!

Jo Ann

Astridia - posted on 07/30/2009

i agree with these women, my son is 8 & he knows to only have 1 girlfriend & kissing is not appropriate yet...i want him informed so he doesn't make any mistakes & can be productive & a good man. (as much as i can help it) :) He knows there are boundaries--i show him just not tell him also. i have a friend but he is just that. Keeping the communication open is very important & being realistic.

Sara - posted on 07/29/2009

Trust me its never to early to talk about sex with your kids. My mom and I had an open relationship and talked about everything inculding sex. It saved me from being raped in my early teens, so talk to her but be technical about it, if you are a christian explain it in the biblical terms that its meant for marriage and to bring 2 souls together. The more informed she is the better, that way if she does start having sex in the future she is safe about it and doesnt end up pregnant or with a disease. The best way to make sure she doesnt have sex this early is to make sure tha she doesnt equate love and sex and that she doesnt equate populatity with sex either. There are way too many babies having babies, and in my Jr, High school there was a 7th grader who was 7 months going into the grade and she had a baby every year till she was 16 then she had twins, stopped a year and had 3 more. I talked to her about it and she said it was because it was the only way she could be popular and have boys like her. Please help your daughter understand that there are different types of "liking" someone and that sex is an adult thing and not something she should want to do for a long time, and that she would miss her childhood if she took that step.

Precious - posted on 07/29/2009

No, it's never to early to start educating your kids on sex and other such things. The problem is that you are right in today's world sex is everywhere ours kids look, it's like they have no choice but to grow up so fast. Sex is such a taboo topic if they are not getting the truth from you the parent then all they have to go on is what they hear whispered about in school and from thier friends who know just as little as they do most of the time. MTV has a series that was on last season called 16 and pregnant, I actually had my kids watch that show with me and then I used that to talk to them about how those teenagers wound up in the predicament that they were in and how they could avoid it. I have a 9 year old son and an 11 year old daughter, who by the way started her cycle a month after she turned 11. Technically and in biological terms she is a 'woman' able to get pregnant and I'm so not ready to be anybody's grandmother. We talk about how I feel feel about sex and kids experimenting with such things and abstinence being the best way to go. I try to just talk to them as things come up but to always let them know that they can come to me with anything.

Brianna - posted on 07/27/2009

well if kids around your area are anything like the kids around mine... better safe then sorry... there was just a girl as young as 12 having a baby in the school district that i graduated from a few years ago. as far as how... well i havent had my son yet so i havent had to have that talk. i was searching the internet for starters on how to talk to your child... here is a christian based one... www.pureintimacy.org/piArticles/A000000596.cfm

and heres one from planned parenthood...

www.plannedparenthood.org/.../how-talk-your-child-about-sex-4422.htm



hope these help!