Is wanting to be a single mum so bad???

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JuLeah - posted on 09/19/2010

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Maybe I am jaded, okay I am. Most mom's are single moms'

I had a wedding. I was the only one to get up at night, the only one who made breakfast in the morning and got the kids to school, coached their teams, volunteered in their class, attended parent teacher conferences, did the hw with them, set up play dates, bought all gifts for holidays, washed clothes, bought food, cooked meals, bed time routine, after school events ......

Divorce was a huge weight off my shoulders. I had less to do actually. I kept the tasks I liked most and lost the burden of the big helpless adult-child.

Yah, single parenthood is better

[deleted account]

Well, I'm going to go against the crowd here... I LOVE being single since I don't have to deal w/ a man anymore and I LOVE being a mom since my kids are my world, but I HATE being a single mom. My ex was a great dad in the first couple of years of our girls lives and THAT family is what every child deserves. Unfortunately for way too many children (including my own now) that is not reality. While I am glad for ME that my ex is no longer a real part of the picture. I will always grieve for what my children SHOULD have, but don't.

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Lanie - posted on 09/25/2010

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i agree. with you all. i love being a single mom. my daughter is about to be 3 this coming month, and i look at all my friends and how they are so unhappy with all their baby daddy drama.. and i look at myself.. and my beautiful, well behaved child.. and think.. man.. im so lucky.

Angela - posted on 09/23/2010

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i love being a single mom.I didnt think i would ever find a guy who loved my son as much as i do but i did and i worked 2 jobs to pay rent and babysitter and dealing with a dead beat father who never saw his kids ( he has 3 and only sees his first born) and i can deal with that bc when my son gets 18 and wants to know his real father his real father will have to tell him why he wasnt around

Keily - posted on 09/23/2010

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Wow I just love what you all are saying. My boyfriend and I broke up about 7 weeks ago and my daughters and I are so much happier without him in the house. It might not sound right to the older generations out there but my life could not be happier right now. Everyone I know keeps telling me how much of a better person I am now that he is gone.

Keep your chin up and don't let anyone tell you that you are doing wrong!! You are MOM so it is all your choice and they had their chance. It is all up to us to take good "great" care of our children.

Lisa - posted on 09/20/2010

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With my first pregnancy, I was still in my teens. The relationship with the babies (ended up to be twins) was long distance and rocky. The day I choose to tell him I was pregnant is the day he came down to see me to break up. We got into a huge fight, he threatened to take my kids so I'd never see them again. Now looking back on that, I know he couldnt but I was young and afraid. I never told him when the babies were born. And didnt speak to him at all until the girls were 3. I choose to be a single mom. And not to say he doesnt help out now, but I'm still a single mom. I come to believe you cant trust or rely on anyone but yourself. There is no shame of being single. I was happily married and caught my hubby molesting my kids. People look down at me because I'm a single mom of 7 -- but what is in the best interest is my kids well being. Good luck sweetie!

Barbora Milena - posted on 09/20/2010

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Thanks for your words!! I know what you are talking about, i have a 10mo daughter and I have been a single mom since the day one...Im happy with the way we are and Im not looking for a man or relationship or marriage! Im happy im not alone in that, ppl tend to look pitty on me, say poor u, how sad and hard your life has to be! When i say im happy with how it is, they think its not normal to do not want a husband and more kids...ppl r square minded and if you dont follow their expactations and stand out from the crowd, they get scared...but who cares..

Jennifer - posted on 09/19/2010

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Yay for single Mommies! We're a breed of women who are strong and independant and wonderful! Whether by our choice or because our husbands or significant others are crap... I LOVE being a single mommy!

Tasha - posted on 09/19/2010

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You know I can definitely relate because I am a SINGLE PARENT and I am very pleased with that. Things are not like they used to be and you could very well easily be married or in a long winded relationship with someone and he could still leave you or not be present. That same scenario can leave someone to a single parent. I think people are just judgmental thinking that a single parent has to be promiscuous. I don't think its bad at all and I definitely applaud all that are doing it. I am very much proud to be a single parent, who works, attends college (in my last yr), and takes care of my child alone with ease. I know there will come a time when things will be rough but the fact is her father is not healthy for her right now and hopefully when he gets his life together he will regain his relationship with her. Until then I will try to be the best single parent because I owe that to my daughter. Stay strong!!!

Sarah - posted on 09/19/2010

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I recently incounted a mum in a baby change room who was speaking to me with respect and equally til i mentioned i was a single mum to my 6 week old daughter and ten year old son. then it was a grunt and she left with out saying another word!!!!!! I have chose to be a single mum i could of had my babys father in the picture but i enjoy habving my babys to myself.... i never seen myself getting married and never will til i have looked after my babys and they are all grown up! I have tried the relationship stuff and its just not for me at this point in my life!! That might change but for now i am as happy as can be!!!!!! Why is it such a bad thing that a women wants children but just not the marriage or the husband or boyfriend????

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