My heart aches - replaced and forgotten

Karen - posted on 08/10/2011

Thank you to you all for your encouraging posts. I am proud of myself and my accomplishments. I am a great mom and have been blessed a million times over for my triplets, my career, my home, my family, friends and my strenght. Thank you for reminding me of that. Your posts help me so much. I cherish your words. I have a friend who is a medium. She has told me that our higher soul (God :)) have bigger and better plans for me. There is a man in my future that will not come in a package that I will be expecting and will sweep me off my feet. I look forward to that and falling in love again.
Hugs and kisses to you all.

Kelly - posted on 08/08/2011

I am quite surprised that many others have not yet responded to your post. I am a single mother to a wonderful son. I too can understand how you feel about getting older and not having a man. It is great that you have a home, have your triplets, have been a great mother, have a career and are able to support your children. You should be so proud of yourself. I agree with Petra's post that you must give yourself credit. You are selling yourself short on your accomplishments. Stand tall and proud because you are a shining example as a mother to your children. You do have to make time for yourself...I always put my son first but have learned that even if I do little things for myself - it makes me feel better which in turn makes a more positive environment for both of us. It can be simply getting a pedicure, buying a magazine to read, or buying new outfit, (new lipcolor as Petra mentioned). The small things will make big differences. To answer your question of how I make it thru each day alone and lonely...two things. 1st = PRAY The power of prayer does wonders...God does have a plan for you and he has and will be by your side all the time. 2nd = WRITING By this I mean what Petra said...keeping a journal. It allows you to express your feeling of being alone and no one but God will know what you wrote. It is also great to be able to look back at what you wrote from time to time to see how your life has changed. The only reason you have not found someone to spend your life with it because God does not just want to give your the next Joe Blow off the street...HE has something way better for you. When you least expect it and when you are not focused on finding someone...the right person will come along your path. Also, don't feel that your x-husband has the perfect summer family...you never know what is going on inside his head that he has to live with for the rest of his life (not being a real father to his three children). A REAL father isn't only a summer vacation father. His grass may look greener on his side but the truth is that it probably is not. You don't know emotionally what he goes thru and nor do you need to know or understand it. You have so many more memoires with yoyur children and your triplets better than anyone else. YOU are what matters and know that you are not alone out there. I am a single 39 year old mother who is blessed with an almost 4 year old son. My life may not be perfect and may need some improvements but I am proud of who I am and what I have accomplished and I know in my heart that I am a blessed and wonderful mother. Keep the faith. I will send prayers and hugs your way :)



P.S. I'd love to see a pic of your triplets. I bet they are real cute :)

Petra - posted on 07/31/2011

My dear Karen the question is, how are YOU doing it? You should be so proud of yourself, for not falling through the cracks...Being a single mom is the biggest job you have to do daily! You're very hard on yourself,and speaking of your ex-husband-The grass isn't always greener on the other side...He may "look" happy, and if he is-Who cares...Look at "you",your "kids","career",your own "home"....These things alone are hard to come by nowadays...You miss giving yourself the credit...Stop the dating services ( it's a waste of money) I have been there,done that! Therapy groups are great If you want to sit around with other woman feeling the same negativity..I know what I am saying sounds so easy,and I am sure it does when you just want to pull yourself out of the hole you're in...Everything I am saying is easier said than done..You need to put yourself out there, for YOU...Not to ease the lonliness, for you! The first step before all is letting yourself "grieve"...I don't know what has happend in your marriage,or the stress of the job,what have you....Let it all go....Start clearing your head-EVEN if it means writing every thought in a journal...It slowly but surely takes the lonliness away...You're letting it go,remember? Second step! whether it's just buying yourself a nice outfit,putting on a new shade of lipstick,a new hair cut....Something for YOURSELF..Last but not least, looking at things with a different perspective..All the blessings you do have! Self affirmation is the key :-)

Last but not least,do not let these t thoughts of your husband mid life crisis sort of "happiness" get to you in anyway...Just because it looks beautiful from far away, doesn't mean it is just that up close and personal..Your age is not a factor to mean, nor the amount of kids, or past...Not all men are like this-I am slowly believing this myself! The first time you put YOURSELF out there, you won't even realize it...You'll be glowing with confidence,and that's what men just live for-You have more strength within than you realize..It's just a matter of grabbing it from the guts,and controlling it. I'll keep you in my prayers :-) Stay strong.