What can i do about my kids dad?

Sarah - posted on 08/20/2011

I was in the exact same situation with my ex. You can get sole custody because of the meth, hands down. As far as the child support you would have to have a court order stating how much he should be paying which means that you will have to go to court. However, I recommend that you wait until he has a job or find out if they might take into account his pay from his last job if you go to court now. I don't know about AZ laws but I do know that in NE they go off of your current pay and if he isn't working he may only have to pay the minimum every month, in NE this is only $50 a month per child. And if he doesn't have a job it's not going to do much good because he's not going to pay it anyway. Make sure if you do go to court, even if it's just for child support, that you have a good lawyer, you have a great case but having a good lawyer helps a lot too. Just make sure that you are the best mom that you can be and don't put your kids in the middle, don't play games, don't tell them anything about their father that would hurt them, and don't tell them that their father is a horrible person. When you tell a child that their other parent is wrong or horrible or whatever the case may be, the child feels like they are bad or horrible too because half of them comes from their other parent. I'm not saying you do this or that you would do this, I am just giving you some advice. I grew up with parents that played games and I refuse to do that to my son even though my ex does it all the time. I just know how it feels so I won't do that to him. If you need to talk or you want more advice you can always contact me. Like I said, I have been in the exact same situation and I have been dealing with my ex for the last 10 years and I have 8 more to go, ugh! I know I will still have to deal with him when my son is grown but I won't have to worry about him feeling bad for wanting to come visit me, call me, telling me something that his father might not want him telling me, etc. It will just be a lot easier. And in my opinion you are a GREAT mom! It takes a lot to stand up for yourself and your kids and it can be scary to choose to leave. I don't think anyone goes into a relationship and has children and thinks that it would be great to be a single mom. Like I said, I'm here if you need me and I hope it all works out.

Jennifer - posted on 08/16/2011

Where i live in Idaho you could get sole custody! It would be worth it to go to court and try, you should have no problems getting a temporary order for sole custody then it would go to court and he would have to show up first of all but i don't think any judge would give him any custody except for supervised.

Marie - posted on 08/15/2011

Yes you will get sole custody for the drugs and remember once a cheater is always a cheater and for child support make sure he gets supervise visit until he can prove himself that he can be trusted again i hope this helps you a bit....

Elisha - posted on 08/08/2011

That is a tough situation. I am not sure of the laws in your state but you should be able to file for Sole Custody on any parenting plan paper work that the court can provide. In regards to the child support issue, you may be able to get some financial assistance through the state to help make ends meet. You can also ask for any wages he get be garnished in the parenting plan/child support paperwork.

Kimberly - posted on 08/06/2011

Thanks Teresa! Im gonna need all the luck i can get

Teresa - posted on 08/05/2011

Definitely go to court for custody. If he lost a job for failing a pee test.... there's your evidence. Hopefully the judge will require supervised visitations. Good luck!