wondering if a book for kids, without dads, would help?

Shaketa - posted on 04/18/2010

Yes I believe this would help so many children and their moms as well.

Lacy - posted on 04/18/2010

I would love a book like that! My daughters father isn't in our life. He always says he wants to be in our lives but never comes to see her and doesn't help what so ever with diapers or formula (and her formula is $300 a month!) Thankfully right now she is only 6 months old so I don't have any questions to answer yet.

Lisa - posted on 04/18/2010

I found "Daddy Doesn't Live here anymore" there are a few versions. My children LOVE this book. It has helped them a great deal. The father of my children also lives in the same town and chooses to spend school holidays with them so his time is quality and dedicated to them. They love this and cherrish every moment with their dad. Works out best for everyone as there are no longer fights. We get together for birthdays and special occasions as they arise.

Feel free to add me and we can discus this further if you like. There are many resources out there for families like ours. Btw I found the book on amazon.com Hope this helps you :)

Jennifer - posted on 04/18/2010

Dawn, I think this is a Fabulous idea, and not just for the Fatherless kiddos, but as a helping tool for their peers in 2 parent families as well.
My own daughter's "Father" left the state for good when she was about 18 months old and apparently never looked back or gave her a though in the 9 years since. When she was in 1st grade she had a terrible time with two children in her class who actually yelled at her " You can't be born without a Daddy" (clearly they had loving stable 2 parent households at that time and didn't know it could ever be any different anywhere).
We all knew that wasn't true then, but it can be a hard thing for all kids to adjust to and to explain. What a wonderful tool your book could be for helping all children understand that different families are indeed different, not just by their cars or pets.
I would LOVE to be a test/proof reader for you.
Thank You
&
Break a Pencil!

Jessica - posted on 04/18/2010

yes totally i would be interested. my sons father is not around and i dont know how i am going to explain this all to him just yet :/

Tanya - posted on 04/18/2010

I think that is a wonderful idea.

Jennifer - posted on 04/18/2010

I would definitely be interested! I have looked for the same type of book but wasn't able to find one either. I also tried to write a book myself but I kept getting stuck on things like "where is my dad?" and other things let that.

Jennifer - posted on 04/18/2010

My (2 1/2 yo) daughter's father also lives minutes away and hasn't seen her in over 2 years. She calls my friend's husband "Daddy Mike." I would definitely be interested in your book, because I know it's only a matter of time before the questions start.

Narelle - posted on 04/18/2010

Oh My goodness, have just read your post! Love the idea. i have 3 young children all between 4 and 2 in age, the eldest one comes says the same thing i dont have a dad, my eldest two havent seent their dad in 2 1/2 years and my son only ever once. would love to have a book that they can relate to, something that lets them know its ok to have one parent and ones better then 2 if one parents not going to treat them right. please let me know if you do a book your self or find one would love to get one !

Nicole - posted on 04/18/2010

I think the idea is wonderful!! and greatly needed. help with divorced, single absent parents is very much needed.

Kristin - posted on 04/18/2010

Wow, Elizabeth Luyben it's so called women like you that give the rest of us strong beautiful women a bad name. I am astounded at such an ignorant statement. Do you know any of us? No, then how dare you day any of us are hooking up with losers and criminals. How about we are all strong, beautiful, hard working women who do NOT need a man to make us feel whole or help us raise our children because we are strong enough to do it ourselves. Sounds like you need a man to make you feel whole and that is a sad situation. My daughter will grow up a strong woman like myself knowing she can do whatever she wants to be and does not need to depend on a man to succeed. And to make a comment like these woman people pick losers and criminals says something about you - are you feeling a bit insecure with your life. I was raised with class by my very strong and classy mother and I would have never said something as mean to a group of women I didn't know. But don't get me wrong I stand up for myself in a heartbeat. You Ma'am need to grow up.

Michelle - posted on 04/18/2010

would just like to say to ELIZABETH LUYBEN if you have nothing nice or helpfull to say keep your comments to yourself, my situation was bad fathers who i found out were bad after i became pregnant but if you had bothered to read the other comments on here some of them could not help there children being fatherless as they passed away i think you comment was very insensitive to them and to us who have no choice but to bring are children up alone as i think your find alot of the time its the woman who are walked out on and as usual we just dust ourselves off and get on with it and bring are children up the best we can, and to everyone else on here good luck and enjoy your children as i do mine everyday they bring me joy and happiness. sorry about the rant but i think it was needed to get across as dawn said we all have different circumstances and are all on here to support each other xxxxx

Kristin - posted on 04/18/2010

I have raised my 8 1/2 yr old daughter by myself since she was born and I think it is a great idea to have a book that talks just about a mommy. My daughter's biological father has not seen her for about 2 yrs now and lives maybe 20 or 30 minutes away and now she could care less and has always called him by his first name since she could talk. I have never talked bad about him, kids are very smart and she knew he was never around taking care of her. When I finally told her who he really was, she looked me in the eye and asked me "Where has he been?" She knows you EARN the name Daddy. The good thing is she has had my step-dad who is her Papa who has stepped up and been the male-figure in her life as well as her uncles so she has been well taken care of and is so well adjusted. She is so Loved - a child can definitely be raised by one parent as well as their surrounding family. But I must say it would get very uncomfortable when we would read books and it would say Mommy and Daddy - it would really throw her off. She would literally tell people at school she doesn't have one of those. Totally his loss. I am very much behind you writing a book for young children who are being raised just by their mommies. You Go Girl......

Michelle - posted on 04/18/2010

i think a book for younger and older children is a totally amazing idea as i have a 13 year old (alex) and a 13mth old (liam) and both their dads have said they both dont want to see them but as my oldest one grows up i will be so proud of him when he becomes a dad as i know he would never walk away from that responsibilty and thats all due to the way i have brought him up dont get me wrong its not been easy sometimes but i have a very good network of family and friends who are always there for me also alex looks up to all the men in my family and some of my friends whom are male as his role modles. at the end of the day when someone tells me what a lovely polite and thoughtfull boy alex is i think i did that. plz let me know how you get on with the book as i would love to buy it when its done i will prob have to buy it on internet as i live in southampton england but itl be worth it.

Terri - posted on 04/18/2010

I agree we must be supportive of each other and do not judge!!!!!! We ALL have our stories and trials and tribulations! We ALL have our BEAUTIFUL children!! Let's support Dawn in her endeavor! It could quite possibly help us all!!

Jessica - posted on 04/18/2010

if anyone is in the same situation as me or even a different situation please e-mail me at jessica102529@yahoo.com If You Ever Wanna Chat about whats on your mind....

Jessica - posted on 04/18/2010

I totally Agree with Dawn Henderson we should all be getting along and supporting each other and not judging anyone cause we all go throught tough things in life and we all need a place too get support from.....

Christina - posted on 04/18/2010

YES Please do! Great idea

Kristy - posted on 04/18/2010

that's a great idea!! my oldest daughters "donor" lives 5 miles down the road and never steps up to the plate. he will get my daughters half sister every other weekend but not my child...sorry excuse for a man

Terri - posted on 04/18/2010

Totally!! I would love to read the book and then to my 2 1/2 daughter who has no dad!! Great idea and good luck!!! Oh, and I would love it autographed too! Email me with any ideas you'd like to bounce off of me if you'd like! tagimit@sbcglobal.net

Cyndi - posted on 04/18/2010

I think it would be a great idea. My five boys ' father walked away from them when my oldest was 11 and my youngest was 8 months old. They struggled along with me but have turned out to be GOOD people and good fathers...a book like that could really help the kids and moms alike.

Dawn - posted on 04/18/2010

im not very well versed in how to use this site completely yet... so i think i may have missed a thread or post from Elizabeth Luyben... cant seem to find it anywhere...
personally, i dont think we know anything about another persons situation, until we have walked a mile in their shoes... we know nothing of their past, or what has brought them to their present... but as fellow moms, doing the best we can for our kids... i think this should be a place of building one another up... not tearing them down ( even verbally.. ) we, no matter the distance, are in this together. it is together, that we will raise, strong, healthy, emotionally secure and happy children.
please, dont judge... just be here for support and friendship. the world needs more of this.. a good place to start is with single parents.

Jessica - posted on 04/18/2010

Elizabeth luyben its not that easy too "Stop hooking up with selfish, immature losers and criminals." so please don't be putting inputs in like that THANKS......

Chandra - posted on 04/18/2010

Elizaibeth Luyben, take your judgement somewhere else!!

(unbelievable)

-c

Chandra - posted on 04/18/2010

we have the same daddy!! not literally, my my 2.75 year old daughter has spent 10 hours with her dad in the last four months and he lives a half mile from us. she asks me about him everyday and i assure her that he loves her, misses her, and really wants to see her. i know she believes me, and loves her daddy. unfortunately her daddy's actions don't match his words. he flakes, makes excuses, and is always cuts his visits short. my daughter is confused. she wants to love her daddy, but he's making it really hard for her.

what really solidifies concepts in her head is books! songs, too, but books seem to make it official for her, and when they speak to her directly about things she's experiencing, she feels special.

so, to answer your question...YES!! write the book already!! :)

good luck,

chandra

Jessica - posted on 04/18/2010

i have a four year old son who his father was a drug addict and went to jail for 2yrs he was only at my sons 1st birthday thats it well when he got out he ended up relapsing 3weeks out of prison he got out january 2nd and i found him deceased i8n my bed next too me on jan 23rd it was the worst feeling in the world i thought but the really worst feeling in the world is that whan my son sees a child playing with their father and he says i dont have a daddy that is the worst thing i kno that we are in 2 different situations but at the end we both have sons that have no father due to their fathers stupidity so i really like the idea of a book for kids that can talk to kids in the way that they will understand about their father not being around im glad too hear that im not the only one with a child who wants a father in their life well i really shouldnt say that im glad too hear i should say that its just good too know that their are other moms and kids that go through what my family does THANK YOU SINCIERLY JESSICA KELLY......

Sam - posted on 04/18/2010

Fiction, or some sort of advise text? My son's dad left when he was a 12 week old foetus. I am writing a series of books for him, about a boy with no father but they are fiction/fantasy and the fact that the main character has no father is not really made a big deal of, because I don't want him to think that it is a big deal not to have a father. He can do just as well in life without a father, maybe better :-)

If you write a book I am a publisher and would be happy to look over it for you.

Shoshonna - posted on 04/18/2010

Because im in the military my son sees alot of guys. He is only two right now but since he was 13 months just about every person in uniform (me included sometimes) got called daddy. I've tried getting him to call them uncle instead of daddy.

Dawn - posted on 04/17/2010

yes that would be great thanks.

Shoshonna - posted on 04/17/2010

i would be totally interested

Allison - posted on 04/17/2010

I would love this! I am the single mother of two adopted children, so this applies perfectly. I believe there would a market for a book like this.

Good luck, Allison

Enrica - posted on 04/17/2010

what a great idea...i have 2 little ones...my son 5 and my daughter a little shy of 3...i think the book would be a great idea...being a single mom you may even qualify for a grant for printing and publishing...good luck to you and post to all of us if you follow through w/ this venture... ;}
i don't think i would post your book to anyone except for a really close friend...that work can be stolen and then your hard work will be lost...write your book and then when it's done then post and we'll support you by making a promised purchase... best of luck to you ;}

Gianinna - posted on 04/17/2010

sounds like a really good idea. that might help him understand the situation.

Yeng - posted on 04/17/2010

i would really help a lot, a bought them a book a few months ago that is locally available here in the philippines, really help a lot (Papa's House, Mama's House)

Gia - posted on 04/17/2010

I love for you write that book i will be your number one fan!! to got my vote.

Tonya - posted on 04/17/2010

Excellent idea!!! My son is 2 1/2...his biological father is a wife-beating drug addict, and thanks to a restraining order, he has never been a part of my son's life. My son never even heard the word "daddy" until my boyfriend moved in with us last month. My biggest fear was that my son would grow up like I did, thinking there must be something wrong with him that his father wasn't around...or worse, to have him grow up thinking that if his father is bad, then he must be too.
Your idea could also lead to a follow up book or books to help children understand not only about not having a dad, but also that bad daddy's don't have bad kids, and about learning to share mommy when someone who wants to be a daddy to our children comes along. I say go for it, and I'll gladly sign on to proofread, offer an opinion, advice, or just to buy it when it's finished...whatever you need.

Georgia - posted on 04/17/2010

As a single mother of 3, who have not seen my ex-husband in 4 years (meth), Absolutely! My 9 year old son comments often on how all the other kids whose parents are divorced still get to "see their dads". This makes him feel estranged in his feelings. His dad is not dead and yet he is a ghost. Brilliant idea mama!

Michelle - posted on 04/16/2010

I would love it! I am a mother who did a single parent adoption so my circumstances are different but in the long run it's still the same to our boys... no dad. If you need any help or input please feel free to ask! My son is going to be four next month.

Tina - posted on 04/16/2010

I think that would be a great idea,I have 5 kids and the father of 3 of them passed away and one is my neice(who I fought for custody of-and neither of her parents are involved).I am a single mother also and the kids really need something to help them understand why their isnt always 2 parents,wether it be by the other parents choice or by death.

Jennifer - posted on 04/16/2010

Well sorry if this comes across to scare any one.. Or to bring anyone down.. But this is actually meant as a wake up call..
Your children may come to question this missing part of their life alot sooner than you expect.. its not going to be when they are teeens, or grade schoolers.. it may be when they are toddlers and pre-k children.. My son being only 2 1/2 now has been asking where is his daddy, and who is his daddy, He has never met, seen or known his father. And regardless of if his father does actually come through and be in his life some day.. he still wants to know who he is and where he is.. Because he see's his cousins with their daddys, his friends with theirs, people around him.. so of course, he is going to question it. It makes him wonder.. Children are a lot smarter than we give them credit for. They understand alot more than we think. since he has seen those around him cry for their daddy when they are hurt, or ask for him when they are tired, or want him when he is away.. That is what he does. .even though he has no clue who he is.. He craves that relationship. He knows he has mommy. He see's those children he is close to has their mommy.. so that's normal.. But the daddy part is missing.. Hmmmm.. Really, at 2 1/2.. So please, be aware.. This is not going to wait until you have had years and years and years to come up with the best answer possible.. I have had to come up with an answer on the spot.. And now it repeated every time.. "you have a daddy, but he just is not in our life right now."
Just a thought for you.. This book would kinda help those who need the help!

Sharon - posted on 04/16/2010

I would love to look over a book like this. I too am a single mom and the last my DD's father saw her was when she was 5 months old (Now 17 months). I know that when she gets older and understands the fact she don't have a dad the questions will come and it'd be great for there to be a book I could turn to. Look forward to reading it.

Jessi - posted on 04/16/2010

most definately.

Kaitlyn - posted on 04/16/2010

definatly.

Jennifer - posted on 04/15/2010

I think that regardless, that either way a fatherless home.. whatever the reason.. Our children are going to ask questions.. And to go about writing a book is going to require finesse. Not to be pointing out specifics about why's and what's.. but more focusing on the children themselves.. And the family dynamics that surround them.. that they are loved and still whole. And are never what the world says they are.. they aren't what the media and the surrounding society says they are... because they are fatherless. Whether they have been abandoned, whether they have been left unexpectedly, whether they were taken from them. Any which way.. The bottom line is they have no fathers! This book is a great idea, and it can be a great asset! And if it can't be done in one book, it can be done in series. Like abandoned children, left children, children with fathers passed away, children with incarcerated fathers, etc. type things. I dunno.. just putting ideas out there. but I actually feel pretty passionately about this book idea.. And I really hope this can be done well.. and done in such mass quantity. . . .
Ok I am done with my tangent for tonight... good night all! :)

Jennifer - posted on 04/15/2010

I am in a similar situation. I realized in the course of discussing other animals with my son that there are many single moms in nature. Bears, ducks, deer and moose and many others. If the male will eat the young mothers know to keep them away. And many species just don't require two adults to raise their young.

I read a book, "Raising boys without men", it comforted me a bit as these boys seem to do just fine.

Good luck with the book. I think raising your children alone is far better than raising them with a poor example of humanity around.

Ayalani - posted on 04/15/2010

I think this would be a fabulous idea!!

My husband passed away before our son was born and they never got the chance to meet. I know as my little boy gets older he will have many questions about his Dad and also feel the 'loss' of not having a Dad like all of the other children at school etc. I know that my position is slightly different to yours as my husband did not choose to not be a part of our lives however I believe that my little boy will feel the same exclusions throughout his life.

Mawiyah - posted on 04/15/2010

What a super idea! :)

Allison - posted on 04/15/2010

i would buy a copy

Jennifer - posted on 04/15/2010

Soooooo... Dawn... after reading all these comments.. Do you think you will be attempting this book?

Kimmy - posted on 04/15/2010

I would love a book like that. My son is only one right now but i dread the day when he asks me mommy where is my dad? So i think a book like this would be great!