help :"(

Dee - posted on 12/14/2011

I lost my baby girl Kamille on Nov 22nd .
I woke up that am did my regular routine
( I have four small boys) off to school. I did not feel her move that am so after eating breakfast I decided to call doc. I went to hospital thinking she was just sleeping, I was told there was no heartbeat. I was broken. I was only 30 weeks. They delivered her via csection, the nurse wrapped her in blankets and explained that some of her flesh had came off, she stated it was normal.
I was stunned , It felt like i was in a movie, I could not believe she was gone. I felt her kicking, moving the night before.
Looking back, I had experienced contractions early on in pregnancy, docs advised to wear a adominal belt to support. I asked doctor on nov 11 I should be worried about her not moving for periods of time> and could we plan an induction he said sure at 38 week> 2weeks prior to that at 24weeks, I went in to perinatology for contractions, baby was not moving alot, but she managed to kick once while on screen after i had drank a bottle of water and she had a heartbeat. The docs said everything was ok.After hearing she was okay, I was given a beautiful baby shower. I had an autopsy done on her, prelims came back with cause of death: undetermined. Docs said full report in a few weeks. but they think it was a cord accident, as the cord was thin and long(they mentioned cord compression).
I am at a lost for words. I wanted this child with all of my heart and i wanted a baby girl all of my life. She was beautiful and looked exactly as I picutured in my dream. I pray daily and try to cope with our loss. I want to try again very quickly to get prego as I am already 39. Has anyone had a stillborn and had another baby that was same gender in the next pregnancy?

Cindy - posted on 11/08/2011

yea :)

Meredith - posted on 11/08/2011

I started reading her blogs :( How sad Looking forward to reading the whole book.

Cindy - posted on 11/06/2011

you can find the book on amazon .

Cindy - posted on 11/06/2011

your welcome :)

Meredith - posted on 11/06/2011

Beautiful song....I will have to look for the book too!
THANKS!

Cindy - posted on 11/03/2011

thank u . I have purchased a book called I will carry you by Angie smith . it's a story about a woman named Angie who's married to the famous gospel singer or the group selah . that were having a baby girl only to find out that she was incompatible with life . it's a very powerful book that I like to read , brings back memories but helps . Also her husband made a song for all the parents who's lost a child . called "I Will carry you" beautiful deep song .

Meredith - posted on 11/03/2011

Hi Cindy,
I am so sorry for your loss!!!! I was 13 weeks when I miscarried almost 4 years ago and that was very hard for me.....I can only image how hard this must be for you. I found talking to people that have been through similar situations helped me...I also got a book about others' stories and that helped me too. It made me feel not so crazy for feeling the way I did. I wish I could be of more help....Take one day at a time...it will get easier but you will never forget!!!
Hugs and Prayers, Meredith