Not in love with you

Nicole - posted on 07/23/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Ive been with my boyfriend for 18 years. We had a baby girl 6 years ago but instead of bringing us close it's splitting us apart. 3 years ago I threw him a hugh birthday party then him and his friends went to a bar after dinner (which I was left with all the clean up). The next day he went out and left his phone at home. I was just checking it out and I found a text message from him to a girl saying that we are in an open relationship and he's just with me because of our daughter. So I called the girl who was nice and told me what has happened saying that they met at the bar. I confronted him on this and he blamed it all on me saying that he's not in love with me and its all my fault for him doing that cause I spend too much time with my daughter. Well stupid me dealt with the pain of this and tried to move on. For the last few months I've been feeling like we have drifted apart too far and I want out. He is the worse to live with. He works at home so he's always here. I am the security for our at home business and he talks to me so ignorant. I'm not in love with him but don't want to be like him and crush him the way he did to me
I resent him for how he makes me feel and they way he speaks to people that are close to him. Ive tried to talk to him about the way he acts and he doesn't care cause he turns it in to a fight. I don't think we can talk about this although I think he kind a know somethings up. I've gained weight after our daughter but Im working hard on losing it. He on the other hand is skinny with no muscle tone but don't want to exercise or anything. Now I find my self wanting some one I probably would never have. See when I first meet my boyfriend he was fit sexy although he had an undesirable attitude I ignored it cause I didn't want to be alone. Thought he would change. But he didn't I did . I will always care for him because of our history together but I don't want to go on being unhappy.

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Beth - posted on 08/08/2012

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Nicole you stated you don't want to crush him the way he did you. Understand that he doesn't deserve your kindness and love if he is mistreating you daily. This is only my personal opinion but I think you need to rid your self of this man and spend time loving yourself and give time for a good hearted man to come into your life...and he will. You deserve only the best, you need to enjoy life and don't waste any more of it. Again you know him best but try to look at it from the outside looking in.

I wish you the best.

Beth

Meg - posted on 08/01/2012

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Dump the looser! You are better than him. You are an emotional being that requires support and compassion. He is using you to make himself feel powerful and will only continue to hurt you and use you more. It is common to find it difficult to leave a relationship no matter how bad but I can promise you that you will find true love with somebody else.

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