Thinking of extra-martial affair

Becky - posted on 10/05/2011 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I'm new here and would just like some opinions from people not in my life, or who know me.
I am married and I love my family but with my husband away with his new job I have been asked out by other men when I go to the store with my kids or pick them up from daycare. I have thought about going out with one of them but I keep having a change of heart at the last minute. My hubby works out of state for long periods of time and and I miss his touch, smell, and conversations. I don't have many friends that I associate with only my boys (matt and brian) they are 3 and 1.

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Jackie - posted on 10/06/2011

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Marriage is sacred, and you have to protect it while he is gone. If you were my friend, I would tell you not to even go there. You're putting yourself into a position where you might be tempted. All it takes is a connection that could possibly lead to something that you'll regret! What man would ask a married woman with kids out? Not looking for just friendship! We all miss our husbands, but they're out there working hard for us. It's our job to keep our hearts connected, so do anything you can to keep that. I know it's hard, but it's worth it. Find a playgroup, meet other moms, & don't stay isolated or this will be a struggle forever. Good for you to open up and be honest about this. Would you want him going out with other women while he's gone? Listen to your heart, it won't lead you astray.

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Torie - posted on 11/05/2011

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Keep this in mind...and NEVER forget it.



If he asks you out knowing you are married and you go for it...you ruin your marriage. If he's going to go out with you when you are married then what are the chances that he won't go out on you if you ruin your marriage for him?



Don't even try it. Your husband misses you just as much as you miss him and it would be more than a betrayal if you cheated on him while he was away from you and your family making money to support you. That would be more than a slap in the face, it would be unforgivable. Stay at home. If you are ready for your marriage to be over then lave first. Don't cheat. Nothing will ever be the same for you if you cross that line.



My husband drives a truck nationwide and is most of the time thousands of miles away. I am a stay at home mom to three kids and am alone for weeks at a time. Of course we miss each others touch, smell, etc. We love each other. That's what it means to love someone. I miss him every second he's gone but I don't agree to go anywhere with anyone. I feel guilty just talking to other men if they aren't my friends.



If you love your husband and value your marriage you won't even talk to these guys because anyone you pick up at the store that still asks you out knowing you are married isn't going to stick around once it's over.

Becky - posted on 10/07/2011

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I bought an electronic friend per my hubby's request and things are going better. We have talked about my concerns and our feelings. He will be home soon and this is going to be a learning experience for us. Thank you ladies for some advice and I will surely come back to this site.

Jackie - posted on 10/07/2011

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I agree that you should for sure talk to your husband about your feelings, but I don't agree that you should be thinking about divorce because of your feelings. They're normal feelings, it doesn't mean that you don't love your husband...you just miss him :)

Natasha - posted on 10/06/2011

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If you are feeling this way then you should really talk to your husband about it an possible consider a divorce if your feeling this way. There is no reason why you should be seeing other men while your husband is gone. I understand your lonely and miss his touch but your husband is also sacrificing a lot for you and your family! Also how would you feel if you worked out of state for long period of times trying to support your family and your husband was seeing other women...just because he missed your touch?

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