Spanking, age and style

Emma - posted on 01/26/2011 ( 54 moms have responded )

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So does anyone spank? What age is "ok" to start? What's better using your hand or a paddle or something else? What age is too old for it? Do you have any special way or routine for it?

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Julia - posted on 02/21/2011

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hand to start with graduating to paddle, strap, cane etc as they get older. No age is too old.
Julia

Sandra - posted on 01/06/2014

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yes, i agree with you! age may differ but after twelve youngsters deserve a real good spanking taking them over the knees and giving them a heavy hand spanking first to warm up the bare bottom to be continued by a wooden cooking spoon or a hair brush or paddle for some ten minutes. this really works fantastic!

Sandra - posted on 01/06/2014

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how long do you give them a spanking with the cane and how many times? do take the kids over your knees then?

Ruth - posted on 03/04/2011

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i started with hand, but now, for teenagers i use the cane with good results...certainly on the bare

Morgan - posted on 10/30/2012

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I started getting spankings with a wooden spoon when I was no more than 2, I know I was in diapers and mom took off the diaper off to spank me on my bare backside. It hurts but it's not abuse unless you are bruising them up.

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Denise - posted on 10/13/2014

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My mom always spanked me with a wooden spoon on the bare butt. No counting swats just rapid swatting until my whole bottom was red. That is how I spank.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/10/2014

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Gee, Sheila...my 16 YO son came in 30 minutes after curfew last weekend, I took his phone, his keys, and gave him extra chores, and it seemed to work much better than BEATING him.

smh at "parents" who can't figure out how to discipline without beating.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/26/2014

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Yep, seems as if some neanderthal types have not figured out the difference between discipline and abuse.

Using implements and demeaning practices such as bareassed beatings is abuse.

Judge - posted on 09/13/2014

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Wow, are you for real? Is this a joke site? Hitting children with belts, brushes, spoons, paddles? Are you serious? Hitting 16 year old young women bare bottomed? Is that like a sexual thing? Pulling down little children's underwear and pants and hitting them? That is really disturbing behaviour.

Jan - posted on 09/11/2014

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I am agree to Michaela I now spank my kids with hand and hairbrush it works fine and they get spanked untill the age of 14 15.

Michaela - posted on 09/08/2014

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I spank my girls 9 and 11 years old with the hand or the hairbrush (very rarely I have used the switch and the birch) on bare behinds. I and my husband started spanking our daughters at approx. 4 years of age. You can spank until 18 but I think that's too old. About 14-15 would I think be a proper time to stop spanking.

Jan - posted on 09/07/2014

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No I am not a sick morther and yes I do spank my kids more morthers should spank their kids, kids needs disipline.

JOANN - posted on 09/02/2014

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THIS SITE SOUNDS TO ME LIKE THERE ARE ALOT OF SUPER SICK PARENTS OUT THERE

[deleted account]

How did he react to the slipper on his bare bottom, Jan? Do you think he noticed the difference right away?

Jan - posted on 08/14/2014

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My son is misbehaving very badly today i have him over my knee for a good spanking today. For the first time i used a slipper and i give him 20 swats with the slipper.

[deleted account]

Good for you, Sheila! I'm curious; did your daughter cry at any point during her punishment? You certainly did all you could to disabuse her of any notion that she was too much of a big girl to be spanked, and especially on her bare bottom.

Eva - posted on 08/11/2014

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Hi, i do let them think a bit first to before I finished it. They need time to think why and that stuff I mean

Jan - posted on 08/09/2014

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I spank over the knee and bare bottom i only use my hand and i give my son 25 swats.

Paloma Bernal - posted on 07/14/2014

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Hi, Sheila
Very well done! We don´t use corner time, but i think it´s fine after a spanking. In our home, we use "time to think" in their bedroom after a good slippering.

Sheila - posted on 07/14/2014

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Hi Paloma

I got about 4 canings a year from 10 to 21 although this is now unlawful so I now use my hand.

My 16 year old daughter came in 45 minutes after curfew time last week.
I smacked her bare bottom 32 times ( twice her age ) and then made her stand in the corner for 15 minutes with her knickers down.

She is now grounded for 2 weeks.

Paloma Bernal - posted on 07/12/2014

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As a spanish mom, i use my slipper to spank, just as my mother does with me.

Catherine - posted on 02/18/2014

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mum who uses her slipper to smack a 12 year old girl bare bottom over mums knee and because mums leather slipper hurts the 12 year old girl she starts wriggling on mums knee. But mum just says I will carry on slippering you and smack you harder with the slipper until you stop moving around. on my knee

[deleted account]

You know what, Sandra? I'll bet every time you give a spanking, Mother Nature's watching over your shoulder with a great big smile on her face. :)

[deleted account]

You sound like a mother after my own heart, Sandra. The progression from hand to paddle or brush just makes so much sense when you've got an older child's bottom on your lap.

I'm not there yet with my two, but that's certainly how my mom dealt with me and my sisters as sometimes back-sassing teenagers. A good, sound spanking to teach a child a lesson is so much more advisable than leaving it to chance, and maybe a wrong turn down a dangerous path in a hard world.

[deleted account]

There tends to be a right way and a wrong way of doing things, Brittany. And as far as I'm concerned, if you're not spanking on the bare bottom, then why are you bothering to spank at all?

It's not just a question of the sting being that much sharper. Even my six-year-old is ashamed when I take down his pants for an unhappy trip across my lap. I think the shame factor in bare bottom spanking only grows in its effectiveness as the child gets older.

Brittany - posted on 02/05/2014

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Oh I know, my paddle is wonderful when I use it on the bare bottom. Nice Red shade.

Brittany - posted on 02/05/2014

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I have used a rubber ruler on my kid bare bottom age 10 months to 3 years old. Frankly it work Great!

Brittany - posted on 02/05/2014

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I am,100% in favor of spanking bare bottom. Frankly, my 8 year old remembers these spankings longer in duration of time. My open hand is effective, yet using my flat wood paddle has best results.

Sandra - posted on 01/06/2014

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hi, i have also made the experience it´s quite good to give kids a real good spanking on the bare bottom by hand but later around the age of twelve or fifteen they really need a paddle or hairbrush spanking which really works on their bare bottom to reach some fairly good results in education ! give it a try, too!

Sandra - posted on 01/06/2014

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hello emma, yes spanking is alright at the age of about ten or twelve. when my son started to masturbate at the age of 13 i have taken him over my lap giving him a good hard spanking on his bare bottom when he had "finished" having his orgasm in bed next to me - then he got his spanking lesson for some ten minutes...! so i will continue to treat his bare bottom either by hand or a thrasher to educate him well whenever it is necessary to teach him a real good spanking lesson ... till the age whenever he needs it!

[deleted account]

I think you've got a very sensible attitude regarding spanking, Jelena. So far, my six-year-old son has only ever had two bare bottom spankings across my knee. My hand has been a good enough implement, but I have to say I like the idea of a leather slipper for older kids.

Lisa - posted on 11/03/2012

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so what mental abuse then? as this doesnt bruise....and would u now pull a nappy down on a baby to hit them (cos too be frank thatswhat it is) with a wooden object? seriously thers smacking (spanking) then ther abuse!

Lisa - posted on 10/04/2012

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and bare ruler on a 2 year old :'( i actually could cry thats so awfull! i have a nearly 3 year old with behavioural problems and is being assessed for autism but i would only ever tap his hand (mainly because his understanding is not good)....... but HITTING a 2 year old with a RULER! so awfull so so awfull! and i very rarly spank my oldest and have never really had to i think u can assert control and understanding between parent and child other ways can be more affective, i dont disagree spanking can have benefits too but not nearly as many as using words in a controlled enviroment and time out with takeing away goodies such as films i was 16 when i had my 1st child and it was hard but im always complimented on how lovely and polite (even son number 2 with his behavioural problems) they are! canning ???!!!....... a ruler on a 2 year old is so so awful :(

Lisa - posted on 10/04/2012

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hand and only hand im disgusted to hear people are caning their child at this day and age! FEAR IS NOT RESPECT!!!! propa dosgusted, i have 3 children and yes i have what u call spanked my 2 oldest my youngest is just turned 1 so its not that i dont agree with it at all but caning???!!! seriously thats awfull! :(

Margaret - posted on 10/03/2012

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3 or 4 years old is a good age to start. Use only the hand and with the child across the knee. That way they connect the lap / spanking and hand at a young age.



I would leave the question of clothed or not for othetr parents to conclude.

Jelena - posted on 09/30/2012

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I spank my children in private and I agree with Dr Dorothy Spencer who said the only safe spanking is a bare bottom spanking. I spanked my oldest son until he was about to turn 15 yr old-- he was just to big for me to handle any more. If needed (extremely poor choices) my daughter will be spanked as long as I am paying her bills or up until marriage. I have weak hands so I use a leather slipper which has a nice sting to it. I use the traditional position.

Sarah - posted on 05/02/2012

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i have used only hands thru underpants or on bare bottom. the older then the harder it can be depending on the 'crime' . Last proper spanking was my youngest 6 months ago, over my knee and pulled his track suit bottoms down to his knees, and he was commando so on to bare bottom. On funny side, i played trick on my youngest and he got his own back and spanked me!! ;) lol

Sherri - posted on 08/28/2011

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Hand when they started being mobile. Covered butt starting around a yr old. Too old by the time they reach 3 1/2-4yrs old.

Julie - posted on 08/22/2011

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I've spanked and will most likely spank again, but never on the bare bottom. That is just unnecessary and embarrassing for the child IMO. I try to make the punishment fit the crime and I guess they've never reached the bare butt crime yet. The older one has done some stuff too...omg. He's 13 now and that would especially be uncomfortable. As for the you want to make them feel it and they are in a diaper....the pop on the diaper when you smack it just right gets their attention without hurting them.

TealRose - posted on 07/11/2011

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On the bare? For a TWO year old? With flexi ruler? Words .. do not fail me .. I just choose not to use them here. Unbelievable... totally unbelievable. My heart bleeds for such at tiny one ...

[deleted account]

i was spanked until i was 16. paddle or hair brush mostly. i haven't started spanking my daughter. she's almost 2. i'm not sure if i will use spanking for discipline.

Amanda - posted on 06/17/2011

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I spank...I started at 2 yrs..I did bare bottom with a flexiruler..I tell her what she did that was wrong,why she gets a spank then i put her over my knee n i adminster the spank then i tell her i love her n i know she can be a better girl

TealRose - posted on 06/05/2011

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I thought this says 'respect not thumps' ? Exactly .. NO thumps .. to children or verbally to me or anyone else.

And I said CHILDREN running riotous. And how would you equate not hitting a child, with them becoming unruly? I never said anything about letting them get away with anything. But there are much better ways that hitting a child - if you Google you will find a lot of 'gentle parenting' or 'gentle discipline' sites.

If it is illegal to hit an adult or animal, or even a criminal - why should children be immune to being protected by law when they are even more vulnerable and defenceless than the rest of us ? They can't fight back. They can't go to a shelter.

Personally I would rather sound like a 'condescending bitch' or 'judgemental and superior' than be known to spank / hit a child, or to protect adults that do. Where I live I actually have a duty to report anyone hitting a child - and I will. The parents aren't jailed - that would be really foolish - they are sent to parenting lessons where better skills are learned. They are only jailed if they continue to hit their children - and I don't think that has ever happened yet.

Julia - posted on 03/24/2011

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Yes, sounds like the condescending bitch could do with a good slap :)
"...we do NOT have huge rates of children running riot..." Really? You must live in a different Europe than I do. Try going out down any high street in Britain on a Friday or Saturday night.
J

[deleted account]

Judgmental and superior much? I am sure with you condescending tone that spanking would have been redundant. I am so sure that everything in europe is so much better than anywhere else in the world. Why I expect to see a news report any day how you've got the utopia for which we've all been searching. As for me and my family I won't listen to your heavy handed bashing of others raising there children.

TealRose - posted on 03/22/2011

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When the sperm hits the egg - that is the age you stop. ie .. you don't start teaching your child violence.

I am a 56 yr old grandmother - I was spanked and I lost my respect, trust and love for my parents the first time they laid their hands on me. I don't and never haver respected anyone that hits another person. I don't and can't hit an animal, or an adult - not even a criminal, and our defenceless children should be equally protected. Spank with love ? You can't do it. "I spank my child with love' Now, try "I spank my wife with love". If you don't hit adults even that idiot girl at the checkout, then you certainly shouldn't be hitting a child.

Discipline means to teach not to hit. I didn't hit my children and they are great adults. My daughter has two small children and she doesn't hit them either - she teaches them right from wrong.

Hitting children has been banned here in Europe for decades and in one country since teh 1700's and we do NOT have huge rates of children running riot - most of the children are well behaved, and kind - and the parents respect their children. As an adult you can't expect respect either - you have to earn it. It goes both ways.

I am appalled that humans in some places still think that hitting a child, 1/3 your size is still thought of as fine .. when wife beating, slavery and rape and buggery of small children in the likes of Ancient Rome have all been banned! Just because something has been done for centuries obviously does not make it right!

Learn how to teach your child right and wrong by demonstration and gently - violence is never right

[deleted account]

My parents always spanked bare bottom with hand and I do the same with Kara. Toddler is good starting bracket and up to they leave to live on there own with no support from parents.

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