Spanking, age and style

Lisa - posted on 11/03/2012

so what mental abuse then? as this doesnt bruise....and would u now pull a nappy down on a baby to hit them (cos too be frank thatswhat it is) with a wooden object? seriously thers smacking (spanking) then ther abuse!

Morgan - posted on 10/30/2012

I started getting spankings with a wooden spoon when I was no more than 2, I know I was in diapers and mom took off the diaper off to spank me on my bare backside. It hurts but it's not abuse unless you are bruising them up.

Lisa - posted on 10/04/2012

and bare ruler on a 2 year old :'( i actually could cry thats so awfull! i have a nearly 3 year old with behavioural problems and is being assessed for autism but i would only ever tap his hand (mainly because his understanding is not good)....... but HITTING a 2 year old with a RULER! so awfull so so awfull! and i very rarly spank my oldest and have never really had to i think u can assert control and understanding between parent and child other ways can be more affective, i dont disagree spanking can have benefits too but not nearly as many as using words in a controlled enviroment and time out with takeing away goodies such as films i was 16 when i had my 1st child and it was hard but im always complimented on how lovely and polite (even son number 2 with his behavioural problems) they are! canning ???!!!....... a ruler on a 2 year old is so so awful :(

Lisa - posted on 10/04/2012

hand and only hand im disgusted to hear people are caning their child at this day and age! FEAR IS NOT RESPECT!!!! propa dosgusted, i have 3 children and yes i have what u call spanked my 2 oldest my youngest is just turned 1 so its not that i dont agree with it at all but caning???!!! seriously thats awfull! :(

Margaret - posted on 10/03/2012

3 or 4 years old is a good age to start. Use only the hand and with the child across the knee. That way they connect the lap / spanking and hand at a young age.



I would leave the question of clothed or not for othetr parents to conclude.

Jelena - posted on 09/30/2012

I spank my children in private and I agree with Dr Dorothy Spencer who said the only safe spanking is a bare bottom spanking. I spanked my oldest son until he was about to turn 15 yr old-- he was just to big for me to handle any more. If needed (extremely poor choices) my daughter will be spanked as long as I am paying her bills or up until marriage. I have weak hands so I use a leather slipper which has a nice sting to it. I use the traditional position.

Sarah - posted on 05/02/2012

i have used only hands thru underpants or on bare bottom. the older then the harder it can be depending on the 'crime' . Last proper spanking was my youngest 6 months ago, over my knee and pulled his track suit bottoms down to his knees, and he was commando so on to bare bottom. On funny side, i played trick on my youngest and he got his own back and spanked me!! ;) lol

Sherri - posted on 08/28/2011

Hand when they started being mobile. Covered butt starting around a yr old. Too old by the time they reach 3 1/2-4yrs old.

Julie - posted on 08/22/2011

I've spanked and will most likely spank again, but never on the bare bottom. That is just unnecessary and embarrassing for the child IMO. I try to make the punishment fit the crime and I guess they've never reached the bare butt crime yet. The older one has done some stuff too...omg. He's 13 now and that would especially be uncomfortable. As for the you want to make them feel it and they are in a diaper....the pop on the diaper when you smack it just right gets their attention without hurting them.

TealRose - posted on 07/11/2011

On the bare? For a TWO year old? With flexi ruler? Words .. do not fail me .. I just choose not to use them here. Unbelievable... totally unbelievable. My heart bleeds for such at tiny one ...

Rachel - posted on 07/11/2011

i was spanked until i was 16. paddle or hair brush mostly. i haven't started spanking my daughter. she's almost 2. i'm not sure if i will use spanking for discipline.

Amanda - posted on 06/17/2011

I spank...I started at 2 yrs..I did bare bottom with a flexiruler..I tell her what she did that was wrong,why she gets a spank then i put her over my knee n i adminster the spank then i tell her i love her n i know she can be a better girl

TealRose - posted on 06/05/2011

I thought this says 'respect not thumps' ? Exactly .. NO thumps .. to children or verbally to me or anyone else.

And I said CHILDREN running riotous. And how would you equate not hitting a child, with them becoming unruly? I never said anything about letting them get away with anything. But there are much better ways that hitting a child - if you Google you will find a lot of 'gentle parenting' or 'gentle discipline' sites.

If it is illegal to hit an adult or animal, or even a criminal - why should children be immune to being protected by law when they are even more vulnerable and defenceless than the rest of us ? They can't fight back. They can't go to a shelter.

Personally I would rather sound like a 'condescending bitch' or 'judgemental and superior' than be known to spank / hit a child, or to protect adults that do. Where I live I actually have a duty to report anyone hitting a child - and I will. The parents aren't jailed - that would be really foolish - they are sent to parenting lessons where better skills are learned. They are only jailed if they continue to hit their children - and I don't think that has ever happened yet.

Julia - posted on 03/24/2011

Yes, sounds like the condescending bitch could do with a good slap :)
"...we do NOT have huge rates of children running riot..." Really? You must live in a different Europe than I do. Try going out down any high street in Britain on a Friday or Saturday night.
J

Sara - posted on 03/22/2011

Judgmental and superior much? I am sure with you condescending tone that spanking would have been redundant. I am so sure that everything in europe is so much better than anywhere else in the world. Why I expect to see a news report any day how you've got the utopia for which we've all been searching. As for me and my family I won't listen to your heavy handed bashing of others raising there children.

TealRose - posted on 03/22/2011

When the sperm hits the egg - that is the age you stop. ie .. you don't start teaching your child violence.

I am a 56 yr old grandmother - I was spanked and I lost my respect, trust and love for my parents the first time they laid their hands on me. I don't and never haver respected anyone that hits another person. I don't and can't hit an animal, or an adult - not even a criminal, and our defenceless children should be equally protected. Spank with love ? You can't do it. "I spank my child with love' Now, try "I spank my wife with love". If you don't hit adults even that idiot girl at the checkout, then you certainly shouldn't be hitting a child.

Discipline means to teach not to hit. I didn't hit my children and they are great adults. My daughter has two small children and she doesn't hit them either - she teaches them right from wrong.

Hitting children has been banned here in Europe for decades and in one country since teh 1700's and we do NOT have huge rates of children running riot - most of the children are well behaved, and kind - and the parents respect their children. As an adult you can't expect respect either - you have to earn it. It goes both ways.

I am appalled that humans in some places still think that hitting a child, 1/3 your size is still thought of as fine .. when wife beating, slavery and rape and buggery of small children in the likes of Ancient Rome have all been banned! Just because something has been done for centuries obviously does not make it right!

Learn how to teach your child right and wrong by demonstration and gently - violence is never right

Ruth - posted on 03/04/2011

i started with hand, but now, for teenagers i use the cane with good results...certainly on the bare

Sara - posted on 02/24/2011

My parents always spanked bare bottom with hand and I do the same with Kara. Toddler is good starting bracket and up to they leave to live on there own with no support from parents.

Julia - posted on 02/21/2011

hand to start with graduating to paddle, strap, cane etc as they get older. No age is too old.
Julia