A 4 year old with uncontrollable behavioral issues?!

Kal - posted on 10/25/2012

my son as just turned 8, and he still throws these silly tantrums over stupid things! being told off! also no! and at bedtime!

also when goes out! shopping! nan's

he does go off on one and punches the doors,wall slams doors kicks stuff?

not sure what to do anymore

he's fine at school and plays with other children ok-ish

few arguments fights just put that down to being boys?

i have tired everything apart from medication!

any suggesstions please!

Kara - posted on 08/05/2011

I am going through the sane thing. My son is going on 5 and his behavior is out of control. I'm not getting many answers from the doctor either!! He throws tantrums over minor things, throws objects, rolls on the floor when he doesnt get his way. However, i see it as way more than typical toddler behavior. It has gotten to the extreme where i am getting reports everyday from Pre-k about behavior but although i feel i had tried to take the right avenues, i havent found a solution. We even took him to a child counselor 3x but he barely spoke and we werent getting anywhere. The defiant behavior is increasing. We try taking items away, ignoring certain things etc. I too feel at a loss right now. The doctors apparently try to avoid diagnosing a child at a young age, but it would be nice to know what it going on. Well i know i really didnt help, but you're not alone!! :) take care

Jae - posted on 09/09/2010

Been there, still there sometimes.My daughter was diagnosed as ADHD with ODD (oppositional Defiant Disorder) and she is also extremely strong for a 5 yr old. It is very hard to explain to ppl that your 5 yr old gave you a black eye. I was afraid to put her in school myself and as predicted we had issues but this year she began taking Focalin XR and her behavior has improved dramatically. We still have the occaisional bad days but alot more good days. See if you can get a referral to a neurologist and see about medication.....it helps restore your sanity.

Amy - posted on 07/22/2010

I am in the same boat my daughter gets so mad when you tell her no she headbutts the floors,walls,doors anything or she will try and tear up things like tonight she got mad cause she was watching TV and I told her very calm when this one is over its time for mommy to watch a little tv when I turned she went into a fit and tried to hit my tv with her doll stroller I have tried everything but meds any advice please :(

Cherice - posted on 07/01/2010

Hi Nikkie~

Well I have LOTS of information to give you & I don't want to post it out in the open because most of it has to do with my daughters experiences with ADHD/ODD. What I will do is later on today (Thursday) I will reply with it to your message box ok. I will be HONEST with you & tell you that this info Im going to provide you with will simply amaze you.

Cherice

Nikkie - posted on 06/30/2010

Well I took Landen to see the therapist and they have diagnosed him ADHD/ODD. He has another appointment at the end of this month to see what exactly can be done with him. I really dont want him zoned out on meds...I wish there was something else they could do.....any suggestions?

Cherice - posted on 06/26/2010

My daughter is 8 yrs old & has been DX with ADHD/ODD and she does the same thing. We currently control it with a great combo of meds that work for her of Concerta, Clonadine & Seraqual. I can tell she has improved a lot since we started these meds. My daughter was also the same way & it got to the point where I was afraid to take her to stores, out to parties, or general just do anything with her. When she started school the ODD became a hard thing to deal with & it was BIG problems for her & getting her education she deserves. So she is now placed in a special school which I dont agree with because I know she is a smart little girl as a matter of fact she is getting A's & B's in school so im starting to doubt the ADHD DX.
But anyhow it took lots soul searching on my half & to figure out how to handle the issues she was dealing with. Ive taken parenting classes, she has 3 counslors and we follow behavior charts, chore charts & she is on a reward system to encourage her when it comes to homework, chores etc...I have also bought 3 really great books which have helped me in working with her behavior, also that have helped me put my skills which i got from the parenting classes to use when working with her. I have also taken a class for special needs children and things are good now. Some advice for you is: Dont allow yourself to get shut off from the real world. You will drive yourself crazy. I do things like the store, post office etc..when she is at daycare/school. You also need sometime to yourself while they are watching tv etc..
GOOD LUCK

Alicia - posted on 06/22/2010

My son(who is 7) is this way well actually my daughter(who is now 11) was this way too. My daughter got soo mad one time she headbutted her bedroom window out. That was before she got diagnosed with ADHD her counselor said she didn't have the ability to stop & think about what she was doing. I put her on medication & she learned rather easily to stop & think before she did anything. Now my son is another story. He is ADHD also but he has ODD & an a anger issue. Just yesterday he was chasing my daughter & busted a hole in the bathroom door(where my daughter went to hide from him) my son is always sorry afterwards but it doesn't matter he still did it. I have tried the taking away te fav things,spanking & time outs. Now I am forced to hold my son down(in the approved DHS hold taught to me by his counselor) until he can calm down enough to talk about why he is angry. This is seeming to help but I am not liking this. So when you go to the Dr. let me know what he suggests cause I am in the same boat you are in. Good Luck!!!

Anitta - posted on 06/21/2010

wow! you just took me down memory lane! my 15 year old would do all of that along with spitting. i was scared to take him out to do the grocery shopping because i knew there would be at least 10 tantrums in an hour which would involve people looking and commenting. one time i had just had enough of the staring rude remarks and told my son to take off his hat and put it upside down on the ground because if he was giving a good enough show that at least 30 people were gathered around they might as well contribute. they all found something more interesting to look at. i gave him his own special place to go to when he felt angry and it took maybe two days for him to learn that he could go to his rug and kick and scream all he wanted to and not get in trouble that he would put himself there all by himself. when he was behaving the way i wanted him to i would wait until he was acting up and try to distract him by saying how nice it felt and how happy i was when he was good. we never used the word bad. he would throw away the naughty boy so he could be good (air infront of the chest) and we played games with my old dolls about how to be nice. if he was frustrated i would as him to show me what he was doing, then ask if i could help him. he is now a loving caring young man...still swears though...but i would never have dreamed he would turn out the way he did compared to the way he was. its alot of hard work, i wont lie to you on that, very tiring but worth every frustrated tear. good luck