Anyone have a child with ADHD? Help any suggestions please

Becky - posted on 10/22/2009 ( 41 moms have responded )

4

21

0

My middle child was recently diagnosed with adhd.. He is currently seeing a specialist and I just feel like its all trail and error.. I am so scared of the side effects. Any suggestions on meds or ways to deal with this disorder?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Rachial - posted on 10/22/2009

1

14

0

My oldest child has ADHD and we do have her on meds. We are on Daytrana and Clonidine. We also see our Chiropractor once a week. We have our managable days and our days where they do not end fast enough. We also have some really great days. You are going to have these days no matter what. It is important to me to remember God knew what her struggles were going to be. He made her in His image. I also believe she is a pioneer because she is teaching and educated her teachers and pretty much everyone around her what it looks like to be a girl with these struggles. She is wonderful and my heart hurts for her sometimes. She is strong and shines each day. Be an advocate for your child at school. You will undoubtedly encounter resistance in getting help. Your child has a right to all help available. Read. Read. Read all you can on the subject. Take what applies and disreagard the rest. It will not all fit your child. The books I can read have been very helpful in understanding how she thinks and feels. Love on your child and remember they are experiencing the world in a slightly different way.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

41 Comments

View replies by

Crystal - posted on 10/28/2009

9

25

4

We tried Strattera but didn't have good results...we are now using generic Adderall which we had to add Abilify to for it to be effective. I think it is trial and error and our counselor and dr. told us it's different for everyone (just like diets). Hang in there!

Lisa - posted on 10/28/2009

1

20

0

My son has ADD and the meds have been the best for him. I no longer see him behind in school or sports. The meds he is on addrell xr25 and it was scary at first but i know now how much it does help and it's all worth it in the end.

Erin - posted on 10/28/2009

5

12

0

Amber, my son was the same way. I fought tooth and nail with quite a few teachers, if you can have him transferred to another teacher do it. My son would go sit in aother teachers class sometimes because he overwhelmed the other. One teacher was such a b____ that she had the class vote him out of the christmas play! Of course a trip to the principle helped with that. No they don't fit in, They are not like everyone else. They are their own special people, and he will find friends. Just takes alot of time and patience. Work with your teachers and bring the principal in when you do this it will take a lot of time but if you are pro active it will help so much.

Erin - posted on 10/28/2009

5

12

0

Unfortunately My son was diagnosed at age 4. People will tear you down for medicating, they will tell you well i can do better or have you tried this... We are an out doors active family. Biking, walking, sports etc. I tried everything before medication, diets, herbs, extra exercise, ALL kinds of discipline... by first grade he was running a mile before school. after he was kicked out of his 5th school by 1st grade I decided to medicate. He was happy but very depressed because he was always in trouble and kids shunned him. he went thru 10 different medications before we found one that lasted more than 3 months, and that was with the help of a physcologist, not his regular dr.. he is 14 now. I didnt realize that there are over 13 types of adhd/add, his is frontal lobe. I still keep him active, I pretty much am watching him 24/7. he has always been a taker, he steals things not like from the store but like pencils, little things he finds and wants to collect. His main side effects are lose of appitie, when he is on his meds he has that blank look sometimes. Other side effects, he gets his work done, he reads he listens, he talks when it is his turn, he has friends. now that he is older he seems to know & understand more what is going on & I have to remind him alot of what he is doing. I recommend finding a good child/family physicatrist to help him and your family deal with what is going on. So after 7yrs of medications, he is still ok. I feel I have made alot of mistakes with him. The best things I have done are being there for him, standing up for him not letting schools peigon hole him (I have fought a lot of teachers), learning not to defend him but help him learn from his mistakes, Getting the proper medical/physicatric help. It's a long road, but worth it.

Tina - posted on 10/27/2009

3

14

0

my 8 year old is on adderall for his adhd. this brand of medicine is taken as needed 9my son takes his twice a day) and is out of their system in 12 hours. i make sure my son has his medicine when he is in school, but most of the time he don't need it on the weekend. when talking or disciplining a child with adhd you have to eliminate all distractions. the key is patience...just remember your child is just as frustrated as you are with this. my husband and i took several parenting courses on how to parent a child with adhd when my son was diagnosed 3 years ago. there is so much advice, but i don't want to over load you...please feel free to contact me with any questions

Tanya - posted on 10/27/2009

1

24

0

Hi there, my name is Tanya. I have twin boys that are nine, they both have adhd. It is such a challenge. Takes a lot of patience. They take medidate for meds and that seems to help. They also have some anxiety issues and take paxil for that. They see a therapist. It can be hard, I know what you are going through, I have had lots of tears. But I love them so much and don't know what I would do without them.

[deleted account]

Becky, my son has ADHD and I don't believe in medicating him. But if that works for your son and your family, then that's the choice you've made. You don't need to feel guilty or frustrated with people that don't understand your situation or decision. People will have different opinions, you just need to know what is right for you and more importantly for your son. In my case, I deal with it. He's in second grade, and he's a bit tough to deal with sometimes. A lot of it, is just him being a boy and if anything I feel sad that society has to force him to be a different way than what is natural for him. If we lived in a farm... that boy would be the hardest working, with the most stamina, and energy. But, we're going to school... so that means that his peers and teachers have to give him some room and let him do his work standing up instead of sitting down. I give him a lot of room. Good luck!

Kris - posted on 10/27/2009

24

21

1

My oldest son was on meds from kindergarten to 8th grade. At one point I could tell that as soon as the grades started dropping it was time to change meds. Be proactive, keep in mind that routines are important. The same time for bed same time for homework.etc. When he was young taking the wrong route to school could set up for a bad day at school. He wants everything predictable. Unfortunately life isn't predictable. We sat and talked out ways he could choose different choices if he had made a bad choice. Next time he would be better prepared. He never took meds in high school. Now he's in college classes, working, has a girlfriend that is very good for him, and he's an EAGLE scout, the highest rank of the Boy Scouts. Do whats right for your child, so that he can be the best he can be.

Tina - posted on 10/27/2009

2

24

0

My 12 year old son was diagnosed 3yrs ago. I used to cry wondering if I should put him on meds. I wasn't sure which one was my son, the one bouncing off the walls and getting into trouble or the one that seems oh so calm( with meds). I was so use to him being hyper,and everyone saying boys will be boys, that when I did put him on Vyvanse (we worked our way up , right now 50mg a day) he was a whole different person. I worked with the school and doctor to get him straightened out on his meds.and he is now in all honor classes. He still has some anger issues and we are working on that, but all in all I think it was the best decision we made. (he also has no side effects with his meds) I hope I have helped you.

Amanda - posted on 10/27/2009

11

18

0

my son is 13,he is on concertta and has been since 7 yrs old.i really like this medicine,he acts like a normal child and not spaced out,it is a timerealease.

yo medicine u really have to be carefull i took him to see a phyciatrist and the 1st visit to see him he told me after 3 min in the room my son was depressed and tried to put him on a antidepressant.i only see the pediatrician now for his concertta and checkups.on this medicine not so bad now but in elementary and middle school if he didnt have his medicine he had a note sent home.but now in high school he comes home with citiz enship awards and student of the month,he is doing wonderfull.good luck!

Chantal - posted on 10/26/2009

66

18

8

Hi I have a son with Adhd/Odd. He is 8 yrs old and has been homeschooled all his life. I have him only on concerta the lowest dose and plan on taking him off and starting homeopathic theraphy with a nathuropath..I also take him for therapuetic horesback riding which has been huge in helping him. He is reading well now , hes maturing. although I still have bad days at times he really is doing well.For me personally no disrespect, I couldn't take it to have him put through difficult times at school,
few suggestions at night try burning a candle called calm as you read to him. Also get lavender aromathy drops. give him a bath before bed with the lavender drops and Epsom salt..they really help to sooth and calm. theres a lot to learn about Adhd, you can get books from library. I have read at least 50 of them. I try to always try something to help my son. Also fish oil and vitamin D...

Michelle - posted on 10/26/2009

25

4

4

Meds are helpful and you do have to do trial and error. One med made my daughter look bi-polar. She tried jumping out of a vehicle twice. Since we switched meds that changed. There is no one size fits all. Each child has different brain chemistry plus some have secondary diagnosis to deal with. A multi-prong approach is best. Therapy(OT & Psych), meds, tons of stucture, school involvement, diet control, something new I wan to try is fish oil--it is a lot of work but the only thing that does work. Bri has been on Adderall XR/tenex, Focalin/tenex, tenex, and Strattera/tenex. All have appetite issues. Making sure Bri eats before meds are given has helped lately. It doesn't always.

Homework is also a fight for us. Teachers don't always understand either. Special ed doesn't always put ADHD kids on IEP's. You just need to fight for your child. I always feel like I have to start the process over with each new school year.

And finally-- DON'T FORGET TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. I stopped for awhile. Big mistake!

Fiona - posted on 10/26/2009

1

20

0

my son was diagnosed at the age of 10 with PDD but this has been overturned 3 years later to ADHD. I found it a relief to have a problem diagnosed because it is SO difficult to deal with if you know theres a problem but don't know what it is--I wondered why motherhood seemed so difficult for me and not other mothers for years. Even tho his diagnosis has changed, many of the symptoms of these learning difficulties and behaviour differences overlap and as you child grows up the diagnosis can become more clear. My son is on dextedrine tablets and they make a huge and wonderful difference, he feels much calmer, more settled and I can have a conversation with him now, I couldn't before--he couldn't concentrate enough to listen, would interrupt with different subjects or just start dancing about! The only side effect has been less appetite. Good luck with getting the right help and Treatment for your child.

Jennifer - posted on 10/26/2009

23

2

3

Quoting Becky:

Thank you Christina, It is just so frustrating. I am a single mother with three children and the thing that really bothers me is those people that they don't believe in medicating children.. It makes me wonder if there are any other solutions.. I feel like if they would spend one day with alex without the meds they would change their mind



People that haven't personally experienced this stuff really should keep their opinions to themselves, don't you think?! =)



 If your child had diabetes you wouldn't withhold meds. That would be just as cruel as not giving ADHD meds. What kid wants to grow up constantly being told to "stop, sit down, dont do that!, etc, etc" ? How good can that be for a child?  IMHO, most of medicine is trial and error. I don't think any of it is an exact science and that 80% of the time all docs are "guessing" for the most part.  Hang in there!

Amber - posted on 10/26/2009

4

10

0

i'm having trouble with my sons teacher she doesnt seem to get along with him or doesn't have the patiants don't know which one. He takes Vyvance in the morring and by the time school is out it has wore off it is only an 8 hour relase. Afterit is wore off i have trouble with his additude and i've tried everything to keep him on task. Homework is a fight for us and school he hates to go to school says no one likes him and nobody talks to him it breaks my heart to now that kids can be so mean to other kids.

Brandy - posted on 10/26/2009

6

5

0

i have a son thats eight years old and has adhd and same with the other woman theres bad days and good days. My son takes three pills in the morning and we also have to give him some at night so he can sleep otherwise he will be up all night. And there is some mornings he is very hyper and its very hard to control and some mornings he is really quite. usually at night before bed we will turn all the lights of for him cause it calms him down and he will relax on the couch before we put him to bed. MY son has a hard time at school theres to much stuff happening there for him to handle but everyone is trying to help him out so he can make progress.

Amber - posted on 10/25/2009

4

10

0

I never new that about the protin i have trouble with my son all the time it seems like i never get anywhere sometimes i wounder if im helping or hendering him help please

Denise - posted on 10/25/2009

4

13

0

i feel sorry for all involved....its just as hard for the parents to deal with and understand it as it is for the child...they don't think they're doing anything wrong.its normal to them...i found with my son u had to watch wat u say because we slang so many words but in there mind, they go by the definition in the book. like the word lay....u say lay something up against the wall and they actually try to lay it up against the wall. instead of saying lean it against the wall. just look for things like that. yes, u have to alter your way of life for them but in the end....its worth it.....good luck to all of you....even though my son is now 22, we still have moments....but at least he listens to me...

Amber - posted on 10/25/2009

4

10

0

i didnt want to give my son meds at first but i can really see a differce in him when he does and doesn't take them

Amber - posted on 10/25/2009

4

10

0

Don't worry hun your not alone my 9 year old has had it for the past 3 years and it has been an up and down rollercoster. I am fighting with the teacher this year

Denise - posted on 10/24/2009

4

13

0

my son was diagnosed many years ago...i had him on meds for my own sanity. he did fine with no side affects.read all info u can on this both for him and u...get in a support group as ur going to need it. my son stopped taking meds when he hit 18 and his productive...key for my son was, when i put him on meds, i trained, not taught , him the rite way of handling things...does he do good now, he's 22yrs old. sometimes he doesn't think when he talks but he knows rite from wrong and he will apologize. he graduated from high school and works two jobs now..lives on his own... all i can say, do wat works and stay strong...love to heart content....i think u will always worry about these type of children but some relief when u look back and see what hes accomplished as he gets older...

Joanne - posted on 10/24/2009

8

20

1

My 7 yr old son was diagnossed with ADHD this summer. We put him on Daytrona. It has made a world of difference. They medication made a believer out of several family members who didn't believe in medication. I have found charts, routine, and alarms work well. I set my cell phone to different ring tones, to help him get ready for school, remember to take the patch off ect. He hears the tone and it reminds him to do a particular task. He likes having the responsiblitly of taking care of himself. I have also learned from his teacher that just because he is in constant motion doesn't mean he isn't "soaking up" what is going on around him. Perfect example, my son is repeating first grade. After only 2 weeks with my son his teacher informed me that yes he can read and is going to do well. (I thought he couldn't read because he would get so frusterated) He brought his 1st nine weeks report card home this week., not only did he read it to me he got all A's !! I also learned that some children need to stay in motion to focus. He taps his pencil or plays with his fingers when thinking. Even when he is playing with toys. Somehow the motion calms his brain down enough to concentrate. I have also heard MANY ADHD child are acually VERY smart. They just have a hard time putting their thoughts into words. Good luck.

Oh ya for my son there are great benifits in a high protein diet. When he starts getting moody, (or as it's refered to at our house medical melt down) we just tell him to go get a pepperoni stick or cheese stick. By the time he's finished eating it, new child. Hope this helps.

Edna - posted on 10/24/2009

6

9

0

I have a daughter with ADD and one of my twins have been diagnosed with ADHD/OCD..We give him Adderall every morning and it has been wonderful for him..I am one of the lucky ones when it comes to the school system..They have been wonderful!My daughter just got her report card and made the honor roll!!It is a HUGE step for her..My 5yro was a terror at school and his teacher and I worked togeather and finally decided we needed him checked out..Up till he got his meds I was giving him Mt.Dew to help him calm him down (even took some to his teacher to give him)He is above average in his class but when it came time to sit and do his work he just couldnt do it..Which would cause him to get frustrated and start throwing things and breaking things..Now when its time for home work he sits down and does it with no problem..Good Luck!

Marcella (marcy) - posted on 10/24/2009

5

0

0

Hi Becky,

There is no easy answer. My kids were harassed in school by the principal and I fought back using the newspaper. My daughter Ashleigh was on ritalin and it wasn't working very well. The principal tried to make me double doctor when I refused to go agint my doctor's wishes. it was an ugly fight which ended with my chidren changing schools to the alternative program. My kids were referred to a specialist in Ottawa and they were put onto a new drug called concerta and it is amazing. it kind of works like a gobstopper slowly releasing meds throughout the day in layers. There is a placebo layer which allows them to get hungry at lunch time. Dexedrine made my sin very aggressive. Good luck and LET ME KNOW HOW YOU MAKE OUT.

Mandi - posted on 10/24/2009

2

16

0

We started with Strattera because it is not a narcotic, that is probably the best thing to start with for medication. Unfortunately, it didn't work, but may for your son. We have since tried Vyvanse, Aderall, Ritalin, and have settled on Concerta. It has worked the best for my son, but everyone is different. Also, I am very strict with his sugar and caffeine intake, as the hyperactivity greatly intensifies...more than it would with any child without ADHD. I have heard a gluten free diet helps w/ ADHD, but I haven't tried that. My other suggestion is to have a lot of patience. When you get tired of having to constantly redirect b/c they can't focus...remember as hard as it is for you to deal with, it's so much harder for them! Good luck!

Stacey - posted on 10/24/2009

3

24

0

My 10 year has ADHD/aspergers and has been medicated for 3 years now. We too use adderall in the morning and the difference is amazing!!! All medications have their pros and cons and only you as a mom can decide what is best for you and your family. try to stay strong in your decision and don't let others make you second guess yourself. No no one else has to live in your shoes. As for the side effects, yes my son has decreased appetite and sleep issues but he himself feels so much better about himself and his performance that you take the rest in stride. I agree with Rachial that God created your child to be a unique individual and if that means ADHD than so be it. As a parent, I believe it just your job to help them be the best that THEY can be. Most of the side effects are not permanent and the doctors are there to help so pumped them for answers and don't be afraid to ask again and again if you need to. I also agree with the others about be your child's advocate, but not just at school. With the doctor as well, unfortunately they sometimes see too many patients and they forget that each one is a real person with real fears and concerns - don't be afraid to remind them! Good luck on the journey and be prepared to fall in love with your child all over again!

Shonna - posted on 10/24/2009

7

29

0

I have a son who has ADHD and he has been on Adderal xr 10mg for a few years now but I give it to him only while at school or in a situation where he needs to be focused and he seems to have no side effects other than a slightly reduced appetite. He takes Clonidine .01mg at night to help with sleep too but that he takes every night no real side effects from that either. He has taken the clonidine since he was 4 and he is now 8. Good luck there is really nothing that helps make him calm at home the Adderall is not effective during play really they ask alot of questions if you don't have things for them to work on while on the pill. My childs therapist says give him heavy work like moving chairs around or carrying a basket of clothes things that take some energy. Hope this all helps.

Mechelle - posted on 10/23/2009

8

49

0

We wher told my 20 yr old daughter had ADHD when she was in the 2nd grade. We could not understand why after lunch she was so hyper. After being test and they told us she was ADHD I researched many different things. We found that he food had alot to do with how she acted. The sugar in it. The doctors wanted her on meds and I tried that and did not liek how shewalked around like a zoombie so we try it our way. I took her off all red dye and all sugar. She only got to eat fod with natural sugar but you have to watch out some natural sugar was not good either. We taught er to look before she eats and the sugar in it and nowshe controld her ADHD with he deit. She grad. top in her class of 500 class mates with honors. She now teaches small children and she notices the signs and helps the parents with it. I hope this helps some. It is hard work on your part as the parent but it is so much better then the meds.

Nicole - posted on 10/23/2009

2

59

0

Hello Becky my son is 11 he has been diagnosed with ADHD since 2005 i was the same way when i found out. My son take 10 mg of Adderall XR before he goes to school in the morning. and it helps out alot.

Paula - posted on 10/23/2009

5

22

0

hiya i have a 8 yr old son who was diagnosed with adhd a few yrs back and he has been on meds since ,,he has not had any side affects at all ... u will see the difference in your child when they have taken them there are optional choices u can choose from speak to ur childs specialist before makin any dessicions .but it will help u both in the long run makin life easier for ur child to uderstand the difference in his behavour , hope that has helped good luck !!!

[deleted account]

My 7 year old son has ADHD. I knew early that he had it before we found out. I found that he lost concintration in things easily. So i went out and got things I realised he had big interests in. If you keep giving him options of different things to do it helps keep them occupied and not bounce off the walls.

Tracy - posted on 10/22/2009

3

22

0

Quoting Becky:

Anyone have a child with ADHD? Help any suggestions please

My middle child was recently diagnosed with adhd.. He is currently seeing a specialist and I just feel like its all trail and error.. I am so scared of the side effects. Any suggestions on meds or ways to deal with this disorder?


 

Tracy - posted on 10/22/2009

3

22

0

Hi Becky, I am the mother of 11 year twin boys both with ADHD and LDs. I try not to sweat the small stuff and be positive on what they are good at. The meds really help too; my boys take Adderall/Strattera and the other Adderall/Dexidrine. We worked hard with the school to getr them identified for special help in school with focus, writing comprehension etc. They also got funding from the school board for special computer programs to help them with their wrting skills. Keep your chin up..Read all you can; it's a learning experience.

Tracy - posted on 10/22/2009

3

22

0

Quoting Becky:

Anyone have a child with ADHD? Help any suggestions please

My middle child was recently diagnosed with adhd.. He is currently seeing a specialist and I just feel like its all trail and error.. I am so scared of the side effects. Any suggestions on meds or ways to deal with this disorder?


 

Jennifer - posted on 10/22/2009

69

32

1

Quoting rachial:

My oldest child has ADHD and we do have her on meds. We are on Daytrana and Clonidine. We also see our Chiropractor once a week. We have our managable days and our days where they do not end fast enough. We also have some really great days. You are going to have these days no matter what. It is important to me to remember God knew what her struggles were going to be. He made her in His image. I also believe she is a pioneer because she is teaching and educated her teachers and pretty much everyone around her what it looks like to be a girl with these struggles. She is wonderful and my heart hurts for her sometimes. She is strong and shines each day. Be an advocate for your child at school. You will undoubtedly encounter resistance in getting help. Your child has a right to all help available. Read. Read. Read all you can on the subject. Take what applies and disreagard the rest. It will not all fit your child. The books I can read have been very helpful in understanding how she thinks and feels. Love on your child and remember they are experiencing the world in a slightly different way.



I read books the week of our "honeymoon"(we stayed home and got used to being a family)! They have some great ones out there. I am lucky enought that my mom is a special ed teacher and has been really, really helpful. She gives us great advice. Rachial is correct. You need to get the school involved. We are lucky enough that my daughters teacher knows all about ADHD and works with us. We meet monthly and she sends home letters when our daughter starts to misbehave. She knows about the charts at home and works with us. This is a big help, because last year the teacher yelled at my daughter and as everyone knows yelling and negative reinforcement do not work on ADHD kids. The teacher was horrible last year, she wouldn't send reports home, and complained about my daughter all the time. I felt like well "duh" of course she's misbehaving she's got ADHD and we are trying to figure out her meds. I can not stress enough that if your childs teacher is not listening DO NOT BE SCARED TO GO OVER THEIR HEAD!! My husband went all the way to the superintendent last year.

Becky - posted on 10/22/2009

4

21

0

Thanks so much ladies for the great advise.. Im new to this site and it is so wonderful to know that there are still good people in this crazy world.. People that take time from there day to lend a helping hand to a stranger.. You seem like strong woman that love their children and care about others and that is very rare these days.. Thanks so much!!

Jennifer - posted on 10/22/2009

69

32

1

Both of my step children have ADHD. We have full custody of our daughter. She is 9. We have seen a DRASTIC change using charts and prizes. She has a list of chores/habits for the a.m and one for the p.m. These include being good at school, doing homework, telling the truth, etc. She gets a small prize (i.e. ice cream for dessert, a 1/2 of TV time on a school night) for each day that she gets 2 stickers. We also have a list on the fridge with the charts of things that she can lose a sticker for such as misbehaving, lying, etc. or gain an extra sticker for. At the end of the week she counts all her stickers and gets a larger type prize based on how many stickers she earned during the week. We use alot of asking questions when she gets into trouble. Her counselor stated that we shouldn't ask her "why" but asking them what they could have done differently works well. The four year old doesn't totally understand the charts yet, but we use time outs for him on the time out step. If you are using time outs you want to make sure that you put them somewhere where you can see them, but there is no stimulation for them, such as TV in view, books, coloring, etc. We don't medicate our daughter during the summer, but the medicine helps for school. The four year old hasn't started meds yet. It's hard to always remember that their poor brains work differently and that they've already done something wrong before their brain registered that it was wrong. Good luck, just be patient. If you are on yahoo my id is eila2_2000

Christina - posted on 10/22/2009

2

29

1

thats whats i say to people who say the love to spend the day with Dalton w/out meds the will ship him back UPS (LOL)... There is a plus he one great kids and he loves school

Becky - posted on 10/22/2009

4

21

0

Thank you Christina, It is just so frustrating. I am a single mother with three children and the thing that really bothers me is those people that they don't believe in medicating children.. It makes me wonder if there are any other solutions.. I feel like if they would spend one day with alex without the meds they would change their mind

Christina - posted on 10/22/2009

2

29

1

i have a 8 yr old son who has adhd and is borderline austim.

i have alot of patience with him and he is on addral in the

morings before he goes to school.. i can always tell when he run out

of his medicine cause he a wild child. Suggestions on ways to deal

with the adhd is to take it one day at a time. Dalton loves to play on

the computer to help him with his adhd and i try and give him alot of

alone time when he needs it.....

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms