Emily - posted on 01/28/2011 ( 9 moms have responded )
Okay, I have a feeling this is just going to turn into a rambling mess, but I have to get it out. I'm hoping that here, I am among other Mom's that can give me insight, advice, and a shoulder to lean on. Let me start off by saying I love my son, Damien, I would do anything for him. He is an extremely smart boy (straight A's), and is very sweet (when he wants to be). Damien is 9 now, diagnosed with ADHD when he was 5, and we didn't begin medicating till he was 6. We only started then because the ADHD was affecting his schoolwork, and I didn't want something he could NOT control to affect his life. His first doctor only gave him the absolute lowest dose of Ritalin and he was only to take it on school days. We couldn't even tell when he was on medication, there was no change at all. We ended up changing to another doctor, and she gets him. She understands what its like and wants to make sure he is where he needs to be. She raised the dose...repeatedly. When he was to the highest dose he could take and there was still no difference in him, she changed him to Concerta. Same thing happened, no difference in his behavior. This time though, he stopped gaining weight and became underweight as a result. Then he stopped growing in height. At this point because he was underweight, even though he eats more than I do, she sent him to a Child Psychologist Specialist to find out what meds he should be on. He is now on Strattera (still working on the amount of dosage, we go back on the 3rd to get it raised again), and Tenex twice a day. We have issues with him sleeping and getting him up in the morning, because he just does not shut down at night like he should. We still can't even tell he is on medication.
With that said...I just am at my wits end on how to deal with him! I have tried so many different punishments, but I feel so guilty and end up giving in to him. I know I have to be firm and consistant, because he doctor said so. I just feel bad because I feel like I am to hard on him. It seems like every time I turn around..he is in trouble for something. He rushes through homework, chores, eating...just to get to whatever he is wanting to do. He and I butt heads a lot over this. I seriously feel like I am losing it sometimes and get depressed because I feel like he is going to or already does hate me. When he gets mad because he doesn't get his way, he says things that he knows isn't true, just to make me think I am in the wrong. I know a lot of what he does is because he is so impulsive, but I just don't know what to do to make this right between him and I. We are working on getting him into counseling, and I am going to suggest some family counseling. Am I the only I that feels like I am about to go crazy? I love this kid like crazy, but its hard to enjoy our time together when there is so much stress. Any suggestions are welcome!