Diana - posted on 03/13/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )
I lost my baby Jan. 17th at 18 1/2 weeks gestation. I was handling ok but this past week has been a nightmare, I don't know if it's postpartum or grief or both but I find it hard to go the day without spontaneously bursting into tears. I feel so sad and I just miss her and the pregnancy so much. Right after it happened I never wanted to be pregnant again but now I just want her back. I want to be pregnant again with HER. I know it's crazy, I am just so sad. I don't know what happened I thought I was handling her death and now everything reminds of what could have been. My daughter is taking it hard too.(she's 7) She keeps saying I wish our baby wasn't dead and although I was able to handle that in the beginning I just break into tears now. I just don't know what's normal, it's been almost 2 months and I think I'm worse now that in the beginning. I just feel totally alone and I have no one to talk to about it. It feels like everyone is so afraid I'm going to be upset that they minimize what happened in order to end any conversation about it. I know people feel awkward about emotions and grief but I feel like I'm drowning on dry land, if that makes any sense.