Are personalities genetic?

Betty - posted on 09/10/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I have a question about genetic personalities. My daughter is 11 years old, does not live with her dad, but has a somewhat close relationship with him despite of not seeing him often enough. My question is, they both have this horrible "power struggle" character trait and I am wondering if it is seriously genetic. My daughter has been this way for the last feew years but it is only getting worse now and if I don't do something soon, I forsee it getting out of control eventually. He works better alone, which is why he loves to drive for a living. He does NOT like to work "under someone" as in have a boss over him telling him what to do. This scares me for my daughter's future for jobs, relationships, etc because she is the same exact way...a control freak. She brought home a paper from school recently that asked the kids what kind of things make them mad and asked all different questions like to number 1-5 with one not making you mad at all or 5 making you so mad your ready to explode. Just about everything she answered was something about her needing to be in control. When she said on it "No one rules me" and how she hates when teachers tell her what to do, I decided I REALLY need to do something. She is actually a very good student who gets pretty good grades despite of her saying this. I am at my wits end with her little "power struggle" and I need to break this now. She is always super argumentive and another thing she listed on the paper is how she hates to br proven wrong because "she is always right"! Anyone else have this problem and if so, what do you do about it? Could it be genetic like her dad, does she need (professional) help or what? Please help!

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Roxanna - posted on 10/21/2012

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Sad to say, but I learned a long tima ago that behavior is inherited! My oldest acts just like her ad in certain situations, even though she has only lived/seen him for only 5 years out of her 17 years. My youngest, from another man, has all the negative AND some positive qualities of my ex. And it is downright frightening. But look closely and you will see YOURSELF there, too. Help her with therapy NOW, redirection and patience. Good luck!

Amanda - posted on 10/07/2012

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I think so. My middle son is just like I was a child. NEEDY. He cries over everything, when he stumbles, when he's accidentally pushed, when he's naughty and gets in trouble, when he hurts someone else... he is JUST like I was. Considering I'm nothing like that now, yes I think so personality traits are passed from parents to children.

Nina - posted on 09/11/2012

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I do believe honestly that we inherit some of our personalities from our parents...I really believe this because I know too many accounts of kids acting like their parents even when they weren't raised by them or there was distance and they weren't around them often.



It's like we inherit our gifts sometimes from our family; like an Artistic person may have had a parent or grandparent who was gifted in that way or vocally...some kids are strong in math, their parents perhaps may be also...



Your child is at a delicate age, she's in a time of changes; puberty. For many girls, it starts in the 3rd or 4th grade; sometimes earlier. Much of what your daughter is going through may simply be hormones.



You may want to just keep an eye on her, spend a lot of time with her, keep her busy doing some type of constructive activity (soccer, band, choir, etc.)



I hope I'm making sense. :-) good luck to you, I hope this helps. :-)

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