Black/White Interracial Relationships: Why Are People SO RACIST?

Colleen - posted 3 days ago

Nice post I like it

Colleen - posted 3 days ago

I agree that its hard especially for people with very contrasting skin colors, such as my parents to be in a love relationship, because a lot of people base picking a love partner on having things in common, one of which so many people think should be at the top of the list is skin color. Again, we are all humans so it really does not matter. Color is unfortunately the first thing, everyone;s eyes see, sceintifically speaking, so it may draw their attention more. I love to see interracial couples, especially black and white, because they remin me of where I came from/my parents. It has to do with what people are used to, too. If people have been in same race relationships and families their whole life, then they are prbably going to see interracial relations as more different. Think about this. Its the same with all races. Some people need to learn its okay, and beautiful for people of different races or skin colors to be together. People need to learn to embrace diversity and see all people as being beautiful, smart and capable of doing the same things. For the people who are outright racist? shame on them.

Raven - posted on 04/23/2013

Thats crazy! I am black and my husband is white. We always get dirty looks from older black men mainly. You would think they would congratulate because they are from the "black panther" era. But hey, I guess Hate isn't racist.

Sandra - posted on 02/16/2013

I think it's all in your head.

Lynda - posted on 02/10/2013

Sometimes your better off not sharing your bad experiences... instead share great experiences. Yesterday we took a ride on the Harley in the rain... It was the best experience ever! We are the interracial couple of love. I am mocha and he is vanilla. He loves my breast and I love his lips. We have been together almost 5 years and he still gives me butterflies. When I think of him or visa versa we call each other just to laugh on the phone. He is 52 yrs old and I am 46. His job title is a Captain of 30 years yet I fell in love with him not his money nor his uniform. We just love each other. My 15 year old says,"you and papa act like teenagers". We giggle and then kiss. Pillow Talk is what I call it.

Lynda - posted on 02/10/2013

I am really not understanding the post at all.

Peter - posted on 02/09/2013

White women are probably the most racist of all the female gender as they are the ultimate slave to the white man. They resent any happiness being recieved from any man especially if the woman recieving it aint white or the man isnt and the woman is.

Ankunda - posted on 01/27/2013

I tell you what, i like read your comments, it makes me happy, am in china now, asian women their still dont belive that White man can date Black woman.

Derek - posted on 01/25/2013

hello,is there anyone out there im a black male who is seeking a white bbw in cleveland , ohio its so dificult to find here.

Ankunda - posted on 01/24/2013

I have white boyfriend, two weeks ago i was with him in German, and one guy came to as then he ask me nicely do you speak Germany? i said no. after he started to speak with my boyfriend then he asked him to? what are you doing with this dirty black woman.I became angry that day i couldnt eat even sleep. why people are so silly?

Toni - posted on 01/21/2013

I feel for you, Autumn... I'm a white woman engaged to a black man who's the father of our five yr old daughter. To top off our racial disparity, I'm 8 yrs older than he is (though luckily, I don't really look it). We had issues in our last home, as we were in an apartment over a woman who made it abundantly clear that he should be with a black woman, rather than me. Of course, she offered herself for that honor, and when he refused to take her up on it, she brought in all of her black girlfriends to prance around the pool outside our apartment and offer to prove the superiority of their "abilities".
It's a good thing my darling is the amazing man I've known and loved for nearly ten years, or I'd have done something rash and clocked a couple of them in their empty little heads...
He convinced me that I should look upon the nay-sayers and racist individuals with pity, rather than anger. After all... If they are so concerned about our relationship, then they must not be fulfilled in their own. Jealousy is a hard thing to ignore, and an even harder thing to keep at bay. Your happiness is really your only weapon, so wear it well and be proud of the beautiful relationship you have and beautiful life you're creating together.

Keep smiling, and kiss him reeeeeeeeeeally well when others are frowning at you! ;)

Odin - posted on 01/11/2013

LML now you see what the fuck we go through. I got a white girl and I get the DIRTIEST LOOKS FROM BLK WOMEN. When it comes to putting up with FUCKERY AND BS for dating outside your race...NOBODY HAVE IT WORSE THEN BLACK MEN.

Lynda - posted on 12/26/2012

I have my boyfriend of almost 5 years and he is white. My family turned their back but I just keep going. People are just confused.

Karon - posted on 12/21/2012

Sweetie, dont let them bother you; the sad thing is after all these years, all the scientific advancement, all the biological tests that people still havent realized that under the skin WE ARE ALL THE SAME. my son did not come out with a third ear or a tail or some bulllshite like that because his dad was white and I am black. hello??? WAKE UP its 2013 (almost anyways) black, white, asian, we are ALL HUMAN!!!! end of conversation. darling, if anyone looks at you funny, you and your bf should ask them where they`re hiding their tail in their outfit or better yet, compliment them on how well they learned to walk upright in such a short time. theyre so dumb and ignorant they wont understand and you and your bf will have a good laugh about it. dont let them get to you they arent worth it. Love is love and if you found it cherish it and pay no attention to the cromagnon fools roaming the streets of the world. hope that helps :)

Onetraeh - posted on 12/19/2012

wow I've never seen white women do tht they normally don't care where I'm from maybe u live in the south?I would just ignore it tho & just concentrate on being your best self & really give them something to stare @!idk how old u r but you'll come to realize the only real things r u & yours everybody else can kick rocks;once you're in tht place of peace u won't gaf.but if it really makes u upset & u just feel like u want to slap somebody then put some gloves on & go hit on a bag for awhile;it's great exercise & a great outlet for any frustrations in your life
onelove

Rachel - posted on 12/07/2012

Screw'em all! People are people and just because you are one "race" or the other doesn't mean jack. My husband is "black" and I'm "white" so what. God made us both and made us for each other. I don't even pay attention to that anymore. The thing that makes me more upset is when people assume that we aren't married and my husband has a crappy job because we're young or that I got married because I was pregnant. None of these things are true. People just make dumb assumptions just by looking at someone instead of asking. I'm a happily married, stay at home mom with a 4 month old and I'm 21. It happens lol

Jasmine - posted on 12/06/2012

People feel ownership over the other sex of their race. This happens among all races. People try to say black women get mad at black men, but I've seen plenty of white women get upset with white men over Asian women. It happens among men too, they don't like to see the women of their race with others. I even know some black men in IR marriage and they get mad when black women date out.



But, people could be staring due to natural curiosity also. Not everyone who looks at you is thinking something evil.



At the end of the day why care? I am black my husband is Filipino. I'm not really concerned with what others think. Do people stare at us? Maybe, but I'm too in my own world to notice or care.

Daniel - posted on 12/03/2012

Black women are upset when they see a black man with a white women simply because there are not a lot of good black men to go around. So when one spurns their own race for another a seemingly good one is out of the potential pool. Black women get upset when a black women dates a white guy because they assume she thinks she is better than they are. You can't win. If you are happy that is all that matters. As inter-racial relationships are not the societal norm, 3% on average, people will tend look and wonder what is going on - what is driving the desire - some might even say you are doing it TO get looked at.

Vicki - posted on 10/12/2012

I live in the South where racism is still alive and kicking and the good ole' boy system rules. I am white and dear hubby is black with 2 mixed girls and my older white daughter. Believe me when I tell you I know all about stares!! Really, to tell the truth, I don't get too many stares that I think are out of hatred but simply out of ignorance and curiosity. Most black people I encounter dont stare too much. Mostly white people stare, the older generation for the most part and some of the white hillbilly's. I have heard that black women do not like to see a white women with a black man but I have not in my 8 years with my husband encountered a black woman who expressed any anger towards me at all. The "cure" that I have found is to simply smile and stare back! This usually quickly cures them of their propensity to stare at that moment.

Klairisie - posted on 10/10/2012

I am 24, and my mother is white and my father is black. Somebody is always gonna stare at you and give you dirty looks, but you can' let that bother you. Girl keep that smile and keep on movin! Think about Jesus, he was beaten and he still gave those people love, and all we are getting is dirty looks. Check out this book called, "Spritual Solutions". I heard its a prety good book, its to help people find themselves. GOD BLESS!

Banjana - posted on 10/10/2012

Jon, you are a fake black man. No real black man can make such shortsighted silly comments about black women or any other race. I say fake either the Michael Jack way (self hate) or you are a racist man. I am married to the most beautiful white woman not because of her color but purely out of compatibility. I bet you will have issues understanding this... Let me say this in simple terms:



There are a lot of extremely beautiful black women in africa because that is where they are made in greater numbers. I have lived in North America most recently I have been in Europe a lot, the black girls you find there are not in abundance, your judgement is unqualified. On the flip side of things, there are so many white girls in africa but not as abundant as the west. You will find a lot of not so optically stimulating white girls in this region. The variety is therefor limited, one would think white women are not so attractive because of that. The west tends to have a wider supply of white girls and this is why you can get a lot of pretty ones. Come to africa and see how your black sisters are made here. Particularly South Africa, Ethiopia, Tanzania, I would advise you not to leave your partner behind as you might get reprogrammed. In these regions you get Western white man roaming around to get an encore on their addiction of black women. Do a bit of traveling before you make some ill statements. Most men crave for women of a different race, secretly or openly like you but do not undermine other races. You will be visually educated and hopefully start to realize that there are beautiful women worldwide. You can not compare races, each race is unique in its own way and none is superior than the other.



If you ask me my personal belief I would say mixed relationships are the best simply because of the global mental conditioning. If you fell in love with an asian woman, trust me you would be thinking asians are the most beautiful creatures. Enjoy your woman for who she is and not because of her color, that will open up your eyes from the bondage of the black girl that messed you up!!



Banjana's husband

Whitney - posted on 10/06/2012

Like what others said, pay no mind to it. I've had my share of ignorance thrown at me,



When I was with my daughter's father (He's white), I used to get snide comments at times from mostly black men. I thought it was so funny how they would accuse me of not liking black men (untrue) or say some other ignorant stuff regarding my relationship, but I would see these same men with a white girl or non-black girl on their arms. The irony lol.



My husband is Korean/Hawaiian and we get looks from a lot of people since where I'm from there's not really any black woman/asian man relationships. I remember when we first started dating he took me to one of his favorite Korean restaurants and I could tell the server didn't really want to serve us. She knew him and some of my husband's family well and I could tell the shock on her face when I came in with him. She gave me some of the most stank looks. *Sigh* I never went back.

Michelle - posted on 10/02/2012

Girl dont worry about it, ESPECIALLY since you have a baby now, ur baby knows when someone bothers mama so just walk away, God don't like ugly and he will deal with them, people are gonna talk no matter what. do u live in the south? fortunately my husband and I have never had nay racial issues and we have a new little girl together (the first for both of us ). we have gotten a few looks here and there in the past but it ain't nothin but a thing, it is what it is..... (we live in birmingham al, so u could imagine its really the old people that look at us)

Brooke - posted on 10/01/2012

I can understand your frustration. It is hard especially when your prego =) However, just gotta keep it moving with a smile on your face. Your man, your child and your happiness is what’s important so don't even entertain it. Misery loves company and those are miserable people.

Autumn - posted on 09/24/2012

here here! exactly, i want that same nonchalant attitude on the other thread about "snide remarks," from black women. people say ignore it on this thread, I want that told to the same women on the other thread who bash all black women because of a few ignorant comments or "looks," from a minority of black women. tell them to "ignore it," and go about their lives too.

Candace - posted on 09/22/2012

My skin is white, my husband's is black, and our children are beautiful. I already know the looks we receive are out of jealousy of our obvious love for each other and our well behaved gorgeous children. I say bring on the racism...we might just go home and make another pretty baby!

Xandria - posted on 09/21/2012

I looked @ jon's post and laughed. That obviously has to be a troll otherwise he's the most ignorant black man I have ever had the misfortune to come across.

Autumn - posted on 09/20/2012

first of all thanks for the comment, it made my day cuz i need a good laugh. I hope you realize you just called yourself "a supposed black man" ugly...if you're cool with that, then i'm cool with your comment, no matter how stupid it is.

Khalia - posted on 09/12/2012

Same here but where i live it isnt the white people..it is the black people.The black guys say the most inappropriate things and give the worst looks ever.ignore them they are to wrapped up in biases

Nina - posted on 09/11/2012

Ignore it; learn early to just ignore all the stares, all the mean comments and subtle stuff some will try to send your way. Do not allow anyone to bother you; it will take time...



I'm 40 years old, been married for 17 years to my husband; he's 45 years old. I'm black, he is white.



Depending on where we go usually depends on how many second glances we get. When we were first dating, I looked like a child practically; not too many people paid attention; when it became clear we were a couple, there were some looks aimed my way and my husbands...even yesterday, something odd happened.



For me, it's the white women mostly that have at times tried to imply that "we lost a good white man" lol That's because I'm a stay at home mom and some of these women who have acted the worse think to themselves how could a white man be willing to "keep" a black woman. lol



Anyways, the black men who give crazy looks have tried to look at my husband with intimidating glares; that doesn't bother him; he's not moved and he has a "who gives a ___ attitude" when it comes to rude people. I should be more like him. :-)



Then, some black men shake their heads when they look at me...as if I have missed out. lol



Ignore people and their stares. Do not allow anyone to make you feel less than or inferior or wrong; you're not wrong; they are.



:-) The best of luck to you! :-)

Jon - posted on 09/09/2012

First congratulations that you found someone you like. Next, I am NOT white but have a white wife and she is REAL pretty. My kids look almost white. Now, lets examine some facts:



> Most people would agree (though they dont admit) that white women look way better than other colors (color is NOT a race!). Blue/Green eyes, flowing smooth brown/blonde hair, soft skin that smells nice, square well shaped body and a lot of times very pretty appearance.



> Black women have just the opposite and even asian women have very little appeal. For example Japanese have slant eyes and facial features not too attractive.



> Due to these reasons, most non whites want a white partner (probably why you have a white husband). Data shows that even in non white countries (like India) whites are preferred as "models" and stars. Rarely you see a "black beauty" in India.



> All this of course is skin deep (but important for sex appeal). There is no evidence (scientificv or empirical) that whtites are mentally superior or even physically superior (in terms of strength).



Now your question:



> Whites are racist as they have higher ground in looks department. Why would they trade our inferior looks with theirs? Also demand for whites is too high so they can choose easily.



> Non whites are equally racist. Try a better looking asian to date a lack person. Same answer and same looks!



> Life is all about trading things. Its not fair. Some people have it all, some none and most have some. Some are smart and successful but ugly (Tiger Woods) while some find true love and beauty.



I think YOU are jealous as well as the racist whites as both of you are psychologically well aware of the whole gambit. You have something that these whites think is "theirs". They need more brains, open mindedness (after all its your husband's decision) and less meanness. I think a lot of attention has made white women mean, racist and money hungry. Its only natural (supply demand).

ElisaBeth - posted on 06/17/2012

Some people are just raised in hate... its sad but true. I know a lot of white women with black guys feel like they are getting the stink eye from other black girls too.
Personally I've only had problems with older white women; one lady even refused to sit down at an outdoor restaurant in downtown San Diego, until my DH and I finished eating and got up to leave... she just stood and stared at us the whole time. We got a good laugh out of it though, that is her hang up, not ours, and we certainly took our time eating; must have sucked standing for over an hour in the heat :)

Just ignore it and be glad you have a good man, regardless of skin color!!

Xandria - posted on 06/13/2012

Here is my observation, whether you are a black woman with a white man or vice versa it all comes down to one thing. The women staring you down making nasty comments are just jealous because they don't have a man period. Be happy with what you've got and smile and walk off. Their nasty attitudes is probably the reason that they don't have a man to begin with.

Autumn - posted on 06/04/2012

i disagree with that i've seen some funny looking mixed babies. I think race has nothing to do with cuteness...i hate it when people say that

Emily - posted on 05/27/2012

I like your post because you don't see mixed couples like you and your man. It is more the other way around black man/ white woman in this day and age. I guess it depends on where you live to because , when I was with my ex, he was black, and he was visiting me in the country and the neighbors tried to cause all this trouble for us because people tend to be scared of black man more than black women (in the country anyway). Across the street there is a married couple black woman and white man and she said she had no problem "crossing over" to country life because she thought it was because of her white husband and white men are dominate in this town. So i found it very interesting they didnt encounter as much discrimination as we did. However, she said once and awhile she would receive dirty looks "for appearing to be out of place", but she stated she transistioned well. People are used to "the old country" and do not know how to respond some reason to our kind of relationships.

TINA - posted on 04/06/2012

I am in the reverse and this is what i tell everyone "I am Korean and white my husband is black and he loves me because i got everything he likes. ME MYSELF AND I. Find a man that wants that in you and you will stop worrying about what the next chick gots." Whether you black blue or spotted someone is always ALWAYS gonna be jealous of someone elses happiness. Congrats on the baby btw and just know they always make the cutest babies. Mixed anything LOL.

Jennifer - posted on 04/05/2012

I can opnly add that in addition to the snide comments and stares - there are also those of out there like all of these wonder moms who have posted comments that see you two together and smile at you and are glad to see you. Take heart in that fact. ♥

Autumn - posted on 03/26/2012

okay thanks for the comment I hope this applies to white mothers of biracial children too

Autumn - posted on 03/26/2012

okay thanks

Della - posted on 03/19/2012

I agree with Rachel. Ignore people and try not to be racist yourself. You don't have to prove your love or anything else. Just be the best wife mother you can be.



I have been in an interracial relationship, marriage for 20 years and have rarely had this type of prejudice directed my way. Look at yourself and your reaction to silly behavior. The answer maybe in you not others.

Badartworld.com

Christiine - posted on 03/18/2012

when i was with my black boyfriend my babys father a few black women would come up to me and say stay to ur own kind and leave ours alone what is that suppose to mean lol so white people are not the only ones rasist

Kertu - posted on 03/17/2012

That's a tough one Autumn.. cause there was also a point when i couldn't ignore it no longer and basically called one of the people who had personally been giving me hard time about our interracial marriage and asked her to stop it.. To that I had a response of very vile bunch of message the content of which I would rather not disclose, calling me all kinds of names.. cause like you, i just felt I just can't let it go anymore, its not fair, its not just, i shouldn't be treated like this and i don't want my children to see me treated likes this. Only.. at this point, when I asked her to stop, not only did she send me the bad messages, but also started spreading rumours about me and my husband, without any base. Sweetheart, some people are just so full of hate that is the problem. I still try to be positive and be kind, but I know, that many times people then just think you are a fool and they can step on you. And then things get worse right. Only thing, if you are a kind who can joke about things, that can also work, just sort of say something witty back to them, not nasty but witty, so they just cannot give the looks anymore. I'm not a very humorous person so doesn't really work :)

Autumn - posted on 03/16/2012

what if you cannot ignore it?

Kertu - posted on 03/13/2012

I totally understand how you feel.. My husband is African, and therefore black, am white. But I have the opposite problem. I get the stares and the hate from black, specially African women. On the street, same thing as you. Like.. you stole our man away, kind of a thing.. And is not just that, there have been a couple of times, when some of his african "friends" have invited single african women to a party and him along (not me and not the children), so that they could hook up.. Its a problem both ways, all we can do is teach our children not to be prejudiced. And just live with it. Another thing is, noone can upset when you are kind and smiling. Smile and laugh and walk proudly next to your man. That disarms all people who have prejudice. Don't have an attitude towards them, just show them kindness. I know it takes so much effort,

Jessica - posted on 03/12/2012

Making you upset is what they want to do. I haven't ever really had more than a few looks in the 12 years I have been with my husband....but my reply would be "um do you want him?" Cause if he wants you too, then y'all can have him. (Which wouldn't happen lol)

User - posted on 03/11/2012

lol

Michele - posted on 03/06/2012

I'm a white woman who has been married to a wonderful black man for almost 13 years. We've learned to ignore the stares and the comments made behind our backs and sometimes to our faces. None of those racists pay our bills or worry to death when our child falls ill. Neither of us planned to love someone of another race, but here we are. We love each other and that's all that matters. We have a circle of friends and our families who have always respected our decision to be together. It wasn't always easy at first, but when you have the love of a good man or woman it doesn't matter the color of their skin.

Amanda - posted on 02/26/2012

ignore it. i get that all the time because we are biracial hes african and im white. i get all kinds of questions from different people. one time my parents even got some crazy questions when they took ym daughter out to lunch. a lady cam up to my mother because she is obviously white and so is my dad and sister. the lady asked my mother where she adopted her african amaerican baby. and wondered if she could ask he rfor the agency number because she wanted to adopt one too. my mother looked at that lady and said im sorry mrs but i didnt adopt her my daughter makes biracial babies. lol

Melissa - posted on 02/09/2012

I agree with Rachel just ignore it if you make snide comments back then in my opinion your stooping to their level of ignorance. I'm 40yrs old and have dated different races but black men are the majority and trust me I've heard it all from (and some comments were so mean & hurtful)white trash to white devil and I will admit when I was younger it intimidated me however that didn't stop me from being with who I felt comfortable and happy with. It got worse when I had children that were mixed I heard(from both sides) that the kids will be confused to noone will want them, I'm like are you serious but I raised them to not care what society has to say about them they should be proud of who they are and where they come from.

Rachael - posted on 02/09/2012

Ignore it. People are stupid and if you care too much about what they think or how they stare or comment you will just drive yourself crazy. Try not to waste energy giving them attention