My kids look white but their father is black

Jessica - posted on 09/23/2009 ( 39 moms have responded )

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My kids look white. Their skin is as fair as mine. My husband is black. I have to wonder if they will face any kind of judgement. Will white kids make fun of them because their half black? Or will black kids make fun of them for looking white even though their half black? Is anyone else dealing with this?

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Dolly - posted on 09/24/2009

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Both my kids are Blasian (black & asian); my oldest looks black and my youngest looks asian (same dad) so I know what you mean. I'm always afraid of what type of comments they're going to hear, but no matter what just know that though society is taught to prejudge, children are so innocent they dont see color. Dont worry so much about what the other kids think, as long as they're confident in who they are the other children will gravitate towards their positive energy :)

Meya - posted on 08/11/2013

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I know this post is aged but I have to comment and I hope you read this as a White Mother to a Color Child because it makes me feel uncomfortable that you are raising our kind kids but think someone will make fun of them because of it. You asked "Will white kids make fun of them because their half black?", I will go ahead and provide this free psychologist service to you. What environment are you putting color kids in where you feel they will be made fun of? And make fun of what? A dominating gene? Melanin? Is your child a male? Tell him then because they are BLACK (Your own kind 1 drop rule and because they have their third eye as black kids) he also has a extra chromosome, one that the white male race LACKS. Tell your black dominating kids that their hair is THICK because its 100 MELANINATED & because it's strong hair. Tell them Melanin.

Terrie - posted on 01/14/2014

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My daughter is 19 yrs. old now, she is also black and white. Her skin color is like a natural tan (if she was all white) everyone from elementary school thru high school has treated her respectful. Some people mistake her for hispanic, when that is brought to her attention she proudly corrects them with her heritage. She was raised not knowing color even tho some people wanted to push their thoughts on her. Your child will be fine, treated fine, accepted by most everyone. I raised mine to believe she has the BEST OF BOTH WORLDS, DON'T try to choose one over the other becoz she can't just be who she is. She has ALWAYS HAD ACCESS TO BOTH FAMILIES, that has always been very important to her dad and I

Michelle - posted on 08/15/2013

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It continues to amaze (and sicken) me how many times this EXACT issue is raised on this board. I just cannot figure out WHY this is an issue? Don't have a bi-racial baby if it is! You CANNOT make your baby look light, or dark, have curly or straight hair, a "wide" or thin nose, full or thin lips....guess what....GOD does all that! If this is such a concern - then you surely should have thought about that before having a bi-racial child. I have three beautiful and very self-confident children aged 11, 13 & 15. They know "what" and who they are. My boys do not necessarily "look" black, but they know they are and that is how they identify themselves. Just as many have pointed out, your child will be teased for many things by many different people...their whole life. They will be too skinny, too fat, dumb, a nerd, not wear cool clothes, the list is never ending - just raise your child to be strong in who they are and they will be just fine! As another poster said, if YOU have a problem with who they are or what they look like, guess what....they will to. So just stop it! And love on your beautiful baby, and all their unique qualities.

Kim - posted on 03/17/2010

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To late now...your kids are here. If people dont get it, so be it. Make sure your kids know who they are and are proud of themselves.

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Helen - posted on 01/08/2014

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My daughter is four years old now and her skin is as pale as mine. She needs factor 30 sun screen in summer or she'll burn. Her eyes are blue/green, her hair dark brown and curly. Her father is 100 % Zimbabwean, very, very dark black skin. My daughter resembles her dad but she has my pale Irish skin. She is unique and she is beautiful. My daughter's grandmother on her father's side made a comment recently, she said my daughter is different to the other 'brown'' girls!!, and that she got ''even worse'' in Winter time (meaning even whiter), it hurt my feelings as my daughter is beautiful and i don't want these comments being made or she'll grow up with a complex. What if i said was someone was ''too black'', it wouldn't be well received, so the contrary shouldn't be acceptable either!!

Melissa - posted on 02/19/2013

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Grrr....Cm just messed up my post. Overall, they will probably face some challenges from closed minded people. My dd is 6 1/2 and has been dealing with it for a few years. Even came home from preschool once upset because another kid told her she couldn't be asain because her skin was too white. I wanna slap the parents when shit is said/done over something so stupid. Like wtf are you thinking raising your kid to think it's ok to be mean/rude to someone due to thier ethnic backround. My daughter is beautiful....she is Filiphino, American Indian, White (from her dad) and from my side she is Australian Aboriginal (black in other words), German, French and Norwiegon.

Her skin was dark like her father at birth and then she lightened up. Still darkens in the summer but she has the asain features (forhead, small nose...). She is excepted by my family and friends so thats all that matters to me. His sisters, cousins and so forth love her. His mom was another story, god rest her soul for never being involved. There was always such an unspoken attitude about him dating a "white" girl and then omg, we got pregnant (110% planned btw). She never spoke to my daughter, never sent pics, cards, letters...NOTHING!

Shellie - posted on 01/21/2013

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How old?I got newborn who look white like me but dark color face.thinking his color can change as get older.I wouldn't worry about it.none are dark skin?odd.

Tia - posted on 01/17/2013

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I know what you mean. I myself am bi-racial with my mother being italian and native and my dad is 3rd gen cameroon. He is super dark and I look white as white! However my son is black as black...Genes and DNA sure are funny hey?

User - posted on 05/07/2012

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So i just looked at your picture and your son has a white complexion with Black features.

Ashling - posted on 01/03/2012

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i have been having trouble with my boyfriends family constantly saying our daughter is not his. I am white ( 50%irish) and he is mixed (dad is black and mom is white). Our daughter came out looking white. She is now 15 months and still looks very white but in comparison to my pale legs i think she is very tan lol. Our daughter has brown hair and gree eyes just like i do. Everyone thinks she is a exact copy of me but i look at her and she her dad in her all the time. I dont know what to do anymore i am tired of my boyfriends family constantly saying she isnt his. I really dont wanna waste my money on a DNA test to prove it to them. Also my boyfriends brother just had a son with a white girl and their son is a little tan brown hair and brown eyes so they use that against me, always saying oh well shes white like you and their son looks darker, why is ur daughter so white? I cannot take it anymore its stressful

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I think that if they look white they will probably get made fun of more by black kids because they are so white but are mixed. you just have to teach them that they are perfect the way they are and that mixed can look all different kinds of ways

Jacqueline - posted on 03/15/2010

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my 2 youngest children are mixed and they look white as well ... I too wonder what the future hold for them ... espically when I myself make comments like oh your babies are white choclate ... or white kisses ... and comments like are you sure they have black in them and other comments that im not getting into ... oh I know for certain is they are my babies and I love them ,.. I see them as human and not black or white ... I see them as gifts from god or my treasures from god and thats good enough for me ... thanks

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now a days you can't throw a rock without running into an interracial family.



I was harassed from side to side because of my skin color and Im not even mixed. The truth of it is, kids are socially awkward and cruel as they grow up. All kids are made fun of for something. Clothes, Shoes, teeth, speech, skin color. There will always be something. Since having my children, there has only been one child in 11 years to ever make a comment to one of my kids... and the minute I showed up and was *proof* of my kid telling her bi-racial truth, that kid was like "wow. cool." and that was that. By far, the most ridiculously inconsiderate and rude statements have been made by adults that should know better. It's how you handle THOSE situations that will trickle down to your children and show them how to behave if ever they find themselves having to deal with something similar.



If you teach your children to show pride in themselves in all aspects of their being, they will have confidence in everything that makes them special - their heritage included.

Vanessa - posted on 10/06/2009

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I would have to say i think it depends on the area! Some area are still racist! My husband is black and native american, while i am hispanice and native american. In our area where there is tribal land i always got called names for lookin so white. My kids all look so much different one looks black or atleast mixed, one looks jus like me but more mexican and one looks black with mexican complection. I have always worried witht he major white and indian population here how my kids will find a place to fit! But kids are strong, i came from california where i was used to a wide range of diversity to this small country town and i found my way so i try not to worry so far down the road and figure i will deal with it when it comes up if it ever does.

Victoria - posted on 10/06/2009

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Quoting Amy:

I am worried about that as well, my daughter's father is black and she is very white. I think she has a wide nose but everyone else says she has my nose, but ither than that you cannot tell.... she will be a yr old in Oct. will she get any darker, will she be made fun of?



I will say that she will get darker the more she is outside playing in the sun, thats the experience with my 2 girls. Both "looked" white when they were born, then a light tan, but always darken in the summer sun. My oldest could "pass" for lots of "races", my youngest stays lighter but tans easily .. both are white (scottish-irish/german/native american) and black/native american

Faith - posted on 10/05/2009

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My son is 3 years old. He has brown eyes and brown curly hair. He has a light complexion-just looks like he has a nice tan. My husband is black. Our son has his nose and his luscious lips. Everyone comments on how beautiful his eyes are, with long lashes, and most people comment on his curly hair. When he is with me, no one ever says a word. When he is with his daddy, then people look like"what?". BUt he looks so much like his father except his skin color is lighter. We have other mixed race couples as friends and we try to expose him to both sides of his color. There are few children like him- maybe 10 or so, where we live, but that is better compared to the zero from when I was a child. Our son is very loving and caring, and I want him to know that people are people and we all bleed red. But others out there are not so open....when I run across those people, I don't involve them in my family's life.

Jennifer - posted on 10/03/2009

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I go through the same too! my husband is black and my son has very fair skin also! but he has his nose! there is a lot of mixed kids out there so i don't think they will have any problems..my son doesn't have any problems now and i don't think he will. so i don't think you have anything to worry about anyways if some kids don't like it they will find better friends

Gillian - posted on 10/03/2009

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i actually had a friend in the same situation when i was in high school. he was half b;lack and half white. but his complection showned no tan or darkness anywhere whatsoever. but you could tell he was black because of his nose. No one ever made fun of them when i found out he was black i was like wow thats crazy cause obviously he did not look it, and thats what most people would say, but no one judge him or was mean to him at all they treated him just like anyone else. i really dpont think you have anything to wory about, but if someone is rude to your kids just make sure your there to lift them up. and remind them the reason those people made fun of you is becasue they have there own iuinsequrities. hope this helps.

Courtney - posted on 10/02/2009

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I have the same concerns! My husband is Black and I am white, My son is a toehead I mean WHITE hair and Blue eyes! We call him our little surfer dude because he looks like he just has a really good tan! People ALL the time say WOW he has a nice tan, like I never put sunscreen on him! There was one time we were at a football game and my husband was holding him and I was pushed back behind a little and I herd someone say "OH MY GOD that Black dude is kidnapping that white baby!" I was soooo mad!! I have many concerns that he will not be accepted by the white community or the black?!

Kristy - posted on 10/02/2009

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I think as long as you love them and teach them to accept both races they will be o.k. Kids will be kids and will always find something to pick on a child about. Just continue to educate them and love them and they should be o.k. Good luck to you!

Penelope - posted on 10/01/2009

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I have bi racial twin daughters who are 15 yrs old and a couple of years ago they asked me if dad, who is black, could pick them up from school cuz a lot of the kids didnt believe they were half black. When they were babies, like 2 months old. some little old lady asked me if i curled their hair!?! they had light brown/dark blonde hair but its curly and blue eyes!

Kiesha - posted on 10/01/2009

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My son looks white, but he's black. My cousin looked white until he reached a certain age. Now he looks black. It just depends on genetics

Michelle - posted on 10/01/2009

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I have a 2 yr.old little girl. She is mixed with white and black. At first everyone thougt she couldnt be mixed and that she was just white. She looks just like me hair, eyes and her skin. But in the end no one cares that she is mixed. She has so many people that love her no matter what. We get the WOW she's mixed but nothing negitive. I understand how you feel and i thought about it for a long time but i know if they have people who love them and that are there for them ....i think in the end they will be okay

Skye - posted on 09/29/2009

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Hi my daughter Serenity is MOZZIE (maori/aussie) her father is maori/spanish with deep olive skin and i am a fair skinned aussie and she looks mostly like me only with a beautiful tan. When we are in the shops if she is with her father i sometimes notice they get a funny look because of the colour difference. But it means nothing because we are happy as a family and dont care about judgemental opinions.

Alea - posted on 09/27/2009

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I have an interracial son who is now 23 and when he was young the whites used to pick on him because I was white and the black kids used to pick on him because I was white and because he had every new pair of jordan's that hit the market lol. Unfortunately, they will be called a lot of things, but you have to teach them about who they are, be proud of who they are and to stand tall and proud. If it was kids and my son fighting, I let him fight his own fight because it's not cool to have mom fighting your battles for you but if it was an adult and my son, you can best believe mom was right there, you have to know when to intervene on his behalf. Try not to put too much emphasis on the "color" issue because if it bothers you, it will bother them and if you get mad or cry, don't let them see it because then you may hear, "Why did you have me if there were going to be so many problems?" which I heard from my son when he was 9 yrs old. I told him that I truly believe in my heart that if God didn't think we could handle it, he would have given him a different mom or he wouldn't have been born and God gave you to me because he knew I would love you with all my heart and protect you with my life, that's why I'm your mom,,,he chewed his finger for a minute and said that's a pretty good idea mom and 23 yrs later, he thanks me all the time for making life possible for him. Good luck sweetie...

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There will always be some judgement made by out of line people who can not mind their own business or have their problems under control so they have to hurt others. My oldest had an encounter----a boy from Morocco said to him you are half white and half Mexican, what is that?? Your not a whole of anything.....my son replied neither are you since you left your own country......... Kids need a strong self-esteem to deal with those type of issues and as we all already know that starts at home. We always get stared at because my oldest is bi-racial and my younger 2 are white. I guess we highlight some pretty boring lives ....

Felicia (Copper) - posted on 09/27/2009

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Both of my children are half black/half white and have had no problems with other children so far regarding their race....granted my daughter is only 3 but my son is 12 1/2 and the only thing his classmates or other children have said to him is...."is THAT your mom?" I have red hair and fair skin and he is quite a bit darker than me with black hair and dark brown eyes. They are just surprised because we don't look alike...but nothing negative. I have found that children for the most part of very accepting and can adapt to just about anything. As long as a parent does their part and teaches their children right we can all live in peace! I for one wouldn't have either of my children any other way! I hope this helps!

Crystal - posted on 09/25/2009

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My son is mixed with black and white, but he looks mostly white, and has my hair texture too. I wonder how kids will treat him at school. And I know that people look at me crazy when they find out he is mixed, but I don't care what they think, I know what he is, and that's all that matters : )

Wendy - posted on 09/25/2009

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I know how you feel.My kids are 1/2 Puerto Rican and White..their father is PR and his skin is fair like mine..so you cant tell that they are PR. Everyone thinks they are just white and when I tell them they are 1/2 PR too they argue with me. Everyone thinks their dad is white or italian anyways and then he speaks spanish and stuff. His mom and Dad are both from PR and his dad is carmel color but his mom is fair.He has 4 other kids and 2 are 1/2 pr and white,look like my kids and his oldest is 3/4 pr and 1/4 black so he is dark. and his other daughter is 100% pr but is very fair skinned.

Amy - posted on 09/25/2009

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I am worried about that as well, my daughter's father is black and she is very white. I think she has a wide nose but everyone else says she has my nose, but ither than that you cannot tell.... she will be a yr old in Oct. will she get any darker, will she be made fun of?

Kim - posted on 09/25/2009

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My boys are ages 10&11 and i can honestly say they have never had a problem. They have white friends and they have black friends. My boys are very outgoing. They make friends very easily. my boys are very light skinned, people used to think they were puerto rican and white.

Amy - posted on 09/25/2009

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Kids are going to find SOMETHING to pick on others about regardless! My son looks like he is maybe half hispanic instead of half black ( with white), he has VERY kind hair like mine. I get comments all the time about him, but only from adults- idiots-. I have never heard him or another child say anything about the color of his skin. Maybe when he gets older but I think it would only be the kids repeating what they have heard parents say! good luck

Cherie - posted on 09/23/2009

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Hi, my son is 11 yrs old and from my experience I have had more trouble from white. But the most part no one really says much. I am trying to teach him that he is a person not a color. So I hope this helps. Good luck

Judy - posted on 09/23/2009

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Not dealing with it but I have two boys well I should say young me Oldest is 24 youngest is 16 different fathers but oldest looks spanish youngest looks all white .... and both are bi-racial... When they get older they become their own person I couldn't have two more different sons in personalities, in friends, in music.... And even though they are completely different from each other they are loved just as equally

Amber - posted on 09/23/2009

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well my daughter is mixed with white and mexican... and she really doesnt look hispanic at all she looks more white with a lil darker tone to her skin... his family always says how white she is...but i dont care...you just got to raise them to be strong and proud of who they are...everyone gets teased and made fun of in life...you just have to teach your child to brush it off and move on...the color of their skin is not whats important its whats inside that matters

Debra - posted on 09/23/2009

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When I first married my daughter's father, that was the question my parents asked me. They told me that my daughter wouldn't be accepted socially by either race, black or mexican. My now grown daughter, told me that she did go through some issues, but back in the 80's that was to be expected. It wasn't as bad as my parents said it would be, but it wasn't all positive either. These days, interracial kids are more accepted by their peers then when my daughter was young. Now her children don't look like they are mixed either. They look more like their father's side (he is white). Two of the grandbabies have blonde hair, and the other 2 have brown hair. Whenever she goes shopping, she sometimes gets strange looks from others when the kids call her mom (she has a much darker complexion and black curly/kinky hair). Your kids will be fine. They might go through some things, but that is to be expected. As long as we live in a country where there is still racial bigottry, there will be problems. My advice to you is to be real with your children. Prepare them for such acts and let them know to NOT let it bother them. Let them know that they are special, because they have 2 heritages to be proud of. Teach them about your husband's ancestory as well as your. And most of all, let them know you love them and that you will always be there for them when they need you. God bless you and your family.

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