Carolyn - posted on 01/26/2009 ( 20 moms have responded )
When I was 19, I became pregnant with my son. My parents had already told me their feelings about interracial dating....I never was brought up not to judge people by their skin, and it wasn't until they found out my boyfriend was black that they told me "It's okay to have black friends, but not date them" (that was my father)..
Of course I did what I wanted because I had my own apartment with three friends from high school. When I found out I was pregnant, even though I was "AN ADULT (yeah right), our apartment living fell apart, and I had to move home.
I stayed away from the house as much as possible, and avoided my parents. I didn't get very large throughout the pregnancy, hid it well and called my parents from the hospital to tell them they were grandparents ( I know terrible), but I couldn't hide it anymore, obviously.
My parents showed up at the hospital with balloons and flowers, my mom was tearful, my father wouldn't look in the nursery window. It took about two months for my dad to totally fall in love with Kenny..and they were best Buds until he passed away when Kenny was 2 1/2 years.
I'm 43 now, and still have guilt towards what I did to my parents....My fear of disappointing them made me do some STUPID THINGS.
Thankfully....we are close enough that all that is in the past.
My point is ...to all the young mother's out there...if you have the chance, give your parents the chance to be disappointed in you now, because it may not be as bad as you think.
Wish I would have someone to tell me that 23 years ago, but I was scared, young and dumb.
Thanks for listening to my stupidity, hopefully it will help someone.
My plan at the time was to put Kenny up for adoption, and keep the dark secret, Thankfully my mother in law came to the hospital and insisted I move in with her, and she helped me set up my, no our, lives........THANK GOD.........Don't know what I'd ever do without him, and he's been such a joy to my life.....That would have been the biggest mistake of my life. I can still see the social worker at the hospital telling me I was making a mistake by keeping him because he'd do better with a married set of parents. Wish she could see him now, in college and flourishing. Wish she could see me now, with a career, home and all of us happy.
Keep your heads up single moms.