we're 2 different religions!!

Malina - posted on 06/26/2010 ( 20 moms have responded )

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im a christian, non-denominational & my son's father is catholic. how should i bring him up? do i implement them both or stick to what i believe? i want him to know both cultures fully including the religions but the catholic faith seems silly to me. i could really use some advice

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Juanita - posted on 07/23/2010

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I am in the same boat my fiance is from ethiopia,Africa and he was brought up chatholic and i am christian. I as well tried to go to there church once and it just wasnt for me. than he tried my church for about 3 weeks and liked it till his mother told him he needed to stick to how he was brought up. So we go to our own church and my 2 yr old son goes with me. and i am pregnant with my 2nd itll be his 1st but he has adopted my 1st as his own. we have had discussions on how to raise them on what religion. he had told me his mother is catholic and his father was another religion i cant remembeer what it was. but he told me that he did both religions when he was younger and once he got a little older he choose what he liked the most. He had told me the reason he choose to follow his mother with chatholicism is because he loved how she was so much more devoted to the religion and was so consistant with him as for his father wasnt and didnt try all that hard. I believe you can teach them of both religions and in the end they will choose what they in there heart feel is best for them.

Lysette - posted on 07/02/2010

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Why not let him decide when he is grown up.. You can just raise him to become a good and rightous person.. He can later decide, on his own, which religion suits him best, if any...

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Laura - posted on 06/15/2012

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My former MIL was raised Protestant, the FIL strict Catholic so when they married it was in the Catholic Church because his mother insisted. So MIL took the classes to learn what she was agreeing to, which included raising the kids Catholic, which she did....none of them practice Catholocism now and only one gives any real thought to religion.

[deleted account]

There are several things to consider here. First and foremost is that it's a huge (not to mention inexplicably nasty and spiteful) inaccuracy to try to make a distinction between being Catholic and being Christian. Catholic not only IS Christian but is also, together with the Orthodox, the very oldest of the Christian faith traditions--the one handed down through the Apostles, the one to which all of the Christian world adhered before the various Protestant groups began splitting off and going their own ways. Some things are matters of opinion, but this one is not--historical fact supports it absolutely.

Second--if a Catholic and a non-Catholic contract a sacramental marriage (that is, if they marry in a Catholic ceremony), the non-Catholic partner is asked to promise before the wedding takes place that children of the marriage will be raised as Catholics. This doesn't, of course, prevent the children from changing religions later if that is what their beliefs lead them to do. If you are one who has made such a promise, then it all boils down to a question of whether or not you're going to honor your given word.

If you DIDN'T make such a promise, then I'll say "Raise the child in both faith traditions." Most children will go the way of least resistance, and won't seek to go to church or respond affirmatively to "Would you like to go to church?" unless an example is set for them by their parents. So giving them SOMEthing, or at least a couple of positive choices, is better than giving them nothing and expecting them to choose something.

Incorrigibly,

Sharon

Miranda - posted on 10/20/2010

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If it was me I would let his know both religions. And then when he grows up he can choose for his self.

Danielle - posted on 10/20/2010

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i am catholic and my sons dad is muslim...we agreed to teach him both and when he is old enough he will choose. that way he doesnt feel like we forced anything on him.

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I went to high school with a guy who had a Muslim Mother and a Jewsih Father. He practiced both. I figure just try and expose them equally to both and when he grows up he will pick the one that he thinks best suits him

Erin - posted on 10/19/2010

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I have this same problem. I do not claim any branch in particular but I do believe in God. I've gone to many different churches, Baptist, Protestant, Lutheran, and Catholic, none of them I've really felt like I was meant to be there so I just became comfortable not going to church but believing in God. Plus to me it seems like they all basically teach the exact same thing! My boyfriend on the other hand was raised Catholic and wants to raise our boys Catholic. So we are in the process of getting them baptized Catholic. However that being said he doesn't believe in every stipulation that the Catholics ask you to. He said that his priest told him that as long as he believes in God the rest doesn't really matter, so in a way he's kind of in the same boat as I am. So we plan to teach them about God but we're not going to be strict about it. But I think you could probably begin to raise your child one way but they could choose differently as they get older. My mom has 9 brothers and sisters, they all began as Methodists, whish is another church I went to that I forgot lol. But now the family is full of Methodists, Lutherans, and Catholics! Again every believes in God and that's what is important!

Desiree - posted on 10/19/2010

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The correct way is for the child to be bought up in the beliefs of the mother as she is the link to the past and the present. Other than that there is no crime in teaching your child the ways of both religions. Please remeber those of you who like to create a difference between being Chritian and Catholics is this. All Catholics are Christians but not all Christians are Catholic. Sorry being Catholic myself I don't like to be told I am not christian. But my house hold is also made up of Catholic and Protestant grouping. All I have done is though my children are following in my religion they learn about all other religions of the world. The next Moto being to know a lot about one thing and plenty of little things about alot of things.

Savannah - posted on 07/25/2010

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to be honest with you, teach your kids everything, the most important thing is they have morales, and whats right from wrong. DONT push anything on your child, cuz they might grow up either 1.very close minded, being judgemental towards anything different, or 2. she might rebel on what u feel is 'right' cuz she will one day be old enough to mke her own decisions. so the best things, is just morales n right from wrong. i hope this helps a little bit...all the best

Shamekia - posted on 07/23/2010

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I'm non-denominational as well and my husband is, too, but we talked about this for a while because I grew up in several different religions and @ 13 my parents let me choose my own religion. I grew up in Catholic faith and Christian Apostolic Church. You just have to let your child learn about God and form his own beliefs as he gets older. Just do NOT put down any other faith.

Deborah - posted on 06/30/2010

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I would say teach him both religions. I was brought up Christian (unsure exact name for denomination), but my husband was brought up Catholic so when our son was a baby we had him baptized. It was very important for by husband's family. In my church you get baptized when you are around 12, when you can fully understand the commitment you are making. If you both attend church regularly then switch off weekends so he has the opportunity to see both religions up close. When he is old enough he can make the decision what he wants to do.

Malina - posted on 06/29/2010

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we're not together but we're raising him together if that makes sense. i tried bringing my son to church but he doesnt do too well. im a non-denominational which means it is by the bible & doesnt have "rules" if u get what im saying

Emily - posted on 06/29/2010

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okay not trying to be rude but are you a non practicing christian? and he a non practicing catholic? it does say not to become unevenly yoked. meaning don't marry someone of a different religion or with too far apart views as your own. I have seen too much horrible stuff about the catholic church and their history to ever want to bring my kids up catholic. But I have also seen so many "christian " churches doind the wrong thing.

the best way to raise them is to teach them to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and teach them what he was about and preached.

[deleted account]

Both myself and my bf are not religious, but he was raised Hindu and I was raised christian (my mom was catholic and my dad baptist... so it was all kind of lumped together) We've decided to expose our son to our families beliefs and traditions and let him decide when he's older if either one is something he's interested in, or neither. But he'll do what we've always done for the exposure, he'll attend Puja's and easter/christmas mass!

Kendel - posted on 06/27/2010

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I am a JW , and my husband is a catholic. So I will bring up my kids my way and if my husband wants to do the catholic thing with them then I won't object , they will go their own way in the end.

Malina - posted on 06/27/2010

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i guess we'll teach him both & later let him decide when he's old enough to understand

Janessa - posted on 06/27/2010

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I am having the same problem with religion. I was raised catholic in Haiti before i was adopted then was raised protestant from my adoptive parents. So i am kinda confused about those two religions but my boyfriend does not believe in religion and does not want try and go to church which i want us to start going and he was raised catholic all of his life and went to a catholic school too.

Carolee - posted on 06/26/2010

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Stick with teaching the "common threads" that are in both denominations.

Shanyda - posted on 06/26/2010

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hye well i understand that totally i am christian as well and my kids father does not believe in anything he is the type he will fight you bout religion but i say to you you go for what ever you believe and your heart well good luck ma

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