whats up with Latino men?

Marsha - posted on 05/01/2013

My husband is too needy. My kids and I are suffocating. Does anyone else have this problem?

Paige - posted on 03/18/2013

Lol I don't think its cool that she can't do what she wants, she needs to stand up for herself. But I laugh because my babydaddy is peurtorican and Im 100 percent white as well, & I also realized everything he says ends with "I told you beja, Im peurtorican. It's because I'm peurtorican" :P Its so funny! Sasquatch & neanderthals cross my mind too haha but not in a racist or offensive way what so ever. Evolution is very unique, especially amongst different cultures in their own way, including white peoples.

Marie - posted on 01/18/2013

Your daughter allows him to do whatever the hell he wants. Grow a backbone an tell him to get his fat mexican ass up and help out. hispanic men respond to one thing: abuse. She has already let him use her as a doormat and he figures she'll never leave cause they have kids. Get in his face, and say te chingo pendejo. That will wake him up

DL - posted on 01/17/2013

how would you like a husband who always says "white people". You do everything like white people. I get so mad at him, and say( not yell); what are you-black?! My husband is a very nice man who has a problem; even after many years of expressing himself. What he means is; not Latino. I remember when I had my first child. Things were less stressed-we were living everyday as best as we could. We made it. It was hard, but if you love your husband; you have to take EVERY DAY AT A TIME. With a Latino; some days may be unreal. However, I had a friend who was married to a Greek, and she had much worse problems.I think with every nationality; there are some problems. Its how you or your spouse were raised. My husband was raised in a poor family, but he remembers everyday how they lived; no matter what. Good Luck to you, and have perseverance-just keep trying. Every day is another beautiful day.

Baby - posted on 01/17/2013

This is my first post here but I have to agree with the original post. I also do not think the "have they evolved?" remark is racist, I think it's funny because I often think it about my own husband. I'm American white and he's 100% Puerto Rican. I call him "neanderthal" and "sasquatch" LOLOL and he agrees! "I'm puerto rican!" is his answer to everything!! I'm starting to understand that that actually means something LOL

Anyway, this topic does bring light to my own situation. We've been together for 7 years (married for one) and he is much like you described - he keeps me separate from his life, which has ALWAYS made me feel unimportant and outcasted. He doesn't spend a lot of time with friends or family, but what ticks me off is that they don't even say hi to me when we're walking down the street together. They acknowledge him only and he doesn't bother to introduce me. I'm actually relieved to find out that it may just be a cultural thing.
My former boyfriend was Ameri-rican and his people were much more accepting of me, they always made me feel included, never rejected like my husband's people do. I guess it's just customary to be ignorant???

As for "stereotyping"... the whole reason stereotypes exist is because the majority rules. But people still don't appreciate boldness.
My husband does in fact seem primitive. He doesn't want me in college, he wants me working to help support our finances. I try to explain to him that an education will get me a career, which is far better paying than a job.

I'm pregnant with our first and right now he's enchanted but with him everything wears off quickly. Soon he'll start yelping that I need to get a job so we can afford it.

Courtney - posted on 01/17/2013

I think it totally depends on how they were raised. My husband is Dominican and he was raised my his mother because his father left when he was young. I think all latin men have the machoness born into them and they see it growing up howver not all of them act on it.
I thought it would be interesting for all of you for me to mention that I wrote a book on meeting my latin husband when I was young in the Dominican Republic. My story is over the history of about seven years, I met him, visited, moved to his country, married and sponsored him to come to Canada. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and if you are interested I would love to share my experience with you! It is called "Deceitful Affection A True Story" and you can find it on lulu.com and other sites! It is short but you wont be able to put it down I promise!!

DL - posted on 01/08/2013

I am an older white woman. I cannot give my name or anything else because of reasons. I have been married to a Latino for 43 years. My husband has his circle of "friends" he has had for a long time. I do not know them. My kids' are grown, but one lives in the same building as me. I have learned to accept being alone. My husband is gone every week end. He comes home to "check" on me; seemingly to see if I'm "alright". I have learned to live with this. On New Years' Eve; he has always stayed with his friends overnight, and I have always been at home alone. I have cooked,; he used to RARELY help me. He helps me clean sometimes, but the pain of lonliness never goes away. We never' now go out at all. His friends matter most to him, I guess. My daughter just accepts it also. Being married to a Latino is completely different, and it takes a lot of stamina, and many prayers.

Jessica - posted on 01/03/2013

Well this is not all Hispanic men.. I ask you this question, have you evolved? You based this on one man and act as if all Hispanic men are this way. I am married to a Hispanic man who has his Master's degree and works for a big 4 accountant firm, he helps around the house, and is a great father.

Leanne - posted on 12/06/2012

my ex is Hispanic and is the stereotypical Hispanic man with kids from multiple "baby mammas" and doesn't take care of any of them...BUT not all Hispanic men are like that there are plenty of white men, Asian men, African American men, etc that do the same thing the common denominator is the "men" aspect and we as woman choose to either put up with it and do everything or choose to change it I was in that relationship for a long time and just realized over the last year or so that it was my fault to for allowing him to not be involved with anything and now that I have taken him court and made him take responsibilities, he has changed for the better and doing more for my son I had to take a step back and make him realize that im not that woman who is going to do everything for him

Jen - posted on 12/05/2012

I agree totally with Cynthia, Thats why I married a american man as well. Not all mexican or latino guys are like that but most are that are raised in a traditional family or raised in another country other than the usa. I was with my ex for 5 years and could never adjust to his way of life, I was not allowed to go to school, get a job, and he even said what I could wear. I was to clean the house and make food. He wanted kids but this was not the life for me so we separated. Once again no all people are like this, put this is the typical type =) hope this helps.

Cynthia - posted on 12/05/2012

I´m mexican and many (not all) mexican guys are like that, maybe that's why I married an american man! This behavior is part of their education, they repeat patterns they see in their homes, the mothers of this "machos" are the most responsable. But you can re-educate them, you just have to be very clear in what you expect from them, because your family is different and you want to educate your kids differently.

Debbie - posted on 12/03/2012

hahaha mue caliente!

Carolina - posted on 12/03/2012

well to tell you Im Hispanic women do everything do laundry, cook, clean house take care the kids and etc.. men seems that is our job to do everything but sometimes men do help out men are different depends who you marry

Juan - posted on 12/02/2012

I think it's just a cliche, because even american Dads are macho dominants like "Homer Simpson" you see what I mean? Just because I watch The Simpsons and see how Homer treats his wife it doesn't mean that every american dad in the USA do the same thing to ther wives. What I do perceive is that american women behave a bit arrogant because of their cultural background and "pretend" to be the "super model american hollywood mum" thinking that in Latin american, mums stay at home and do nothing more than that...Get over that idea! you are wrong american ladies, Latin american women do study, work and raise children at the same time too!.

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Tara - posted on 10/07/2012

I can tell you I am an american woman that is in my second marriage to a Honduran man and in my experience with my friends and husband the women DO SERVE THEIR MEN! I am going through issues at this moment for the same reason. we have been married for 7 years now and honestly I am tired of it! Now dont get me wrong there are some who are not that way but the Majority ARE! it is the MACHO culture even when you go to baby showers, or children s birthdays they will have beer and men will be there drinking and normally separate from the women. all women will get together and help serving everyone and doing all clean up. This is not bashing the culture because I think there are also things that are beautiful about the culture but also I think that the men should have a little compromise when the choose to marry an american woman and adapt to our cultures like we do to theirs! Both of my experiences were the same in that aspect also almost ALL of my friends are from Mexico, Guatemala, El Salvador, or Honduras and the concisenes is the same in each one the women all agree too but they are from a place where divorce is not an option.

Rachel - posted on 01/11/2011

My husband is Puerto Rican and he is not this way, for the most part. We both work fulltime and we also both do all of the cleaning, cooking,and childcare. I guess I am lucky because most of the other men in his family are not like him. His dad is really bad. His dad was so bad that he didn't want to talk about anything that had to do with money in front of me either because "money is not women's business," my husband would tell him that it is not this way in our house and considering I make 3 times what my husband makes, it is my business. My father in law will not do anything for himself, she does it all. I guess it all depends on the individual and how he was raised but as you can see from my husband sometimes that doesn't predict anything either.

Breana - posted on 01/01/2011

My husband is puerto rican. We have 3 kids together and he is the best man i have ever met. I get sick alot so sometimes he helps out with the dishes, the kids and cleaning more than i do and still has to go to work in the morning, so they're not all like that:)

Lavet - posted on 01/01/2011

OMG!!!! I think by saying "they" some of you guys are generalizing and being racist! Was he like this before your daughter chose to marry him? Or did he beat her and force her to marry him? Maybe it's how he was raised. My husband is Latino and is very respectful of me. He was also respectful of me while we were dating and I knew his values and beliefs before hand.

Iysha - posted on 12/26/2010

lol....when i told my grandma that my fiance likes to cook, she said that her husband NEVER set foot in the kitchen unless it was to eat! haha...In Mexican Culture, men work, women take care of the home...that is way old fashioned though...my other grandmother thought I should have been married at 16 and wanted me to move in with her to take care of her when she was sick...I was 16...i didnt know how to cook, I didnt even know how to work the dishwasher or the washer/dryer back then. lol.

I grew up with my mom cooking and cleaning and doing laundry and I do that too...not because I have to or my fiance expects it...just because that was what my mom did. i suppose it would be the same for men...their fathers did it and they are modeling their behavior. i like cooking and If i dont feel like cooking, i can order a pizza. lol...no biggie. I do laundry and that doesnt bother me, i am the primary caregiver for our daughter and i dont mind as long as when I need help or want to go do something without her I can count on him to take care of her. I used to work, not right now but i will be returning to school, and i will still be cooking, cleaning and doing laundry...that doesnt meant that my fiance wont put in a load of laundry if I ask him to. He grew up with a single mom so he knows how to cook and clean and all that...in fact he does all 3 better than me and taught me how to use the washer/dryer and how to cook without burning something.

It is really just the way people are brought up that make them the partners that they are and it is the way they are brought up that makes them expect cirtain things of their partner.

Jackie - posted on 12/26/2010

Okay so instead of bashing her for answering an honest question maybe you should ask her a question. Theres no need to be rude. Even in times past in white American history the woman was expected to do it all and more and we white american women say that they have evolved so before everybody goes judging her lets think about that. Just because white people refer to other races in the same way that we do our own race doesnt mean were racist.
To answer your question hun not all hispanic men treat their women the same. My ex husband was mexican and treated me worse than your explaining and was physically violent to me as was his father to his mother and step mother. A friend of mines mother was with a mexican for 20 years then a Honduran for 2 and they both beat her.
Now before anybody says that is racist I will also say that my first abusive relationship was with a white man and if a mans going to beat you it dont matter what race he is.
Alot of hispanic cultures the woman is literally the house mother as you described. Not all of them are that way so you just have to know not only where theyre from but how they were raised.

Destini - posted on 12/21/2010

I personally believe they are this way because that's how they were raised up. My Hubby is Hispanic and he does not treat me the way your son-in-law treats your daughter but I still do all the house work.. I am a stay at home mom so I dont think its a big deal that I cook, clean, and tend to my child! HOWEVER if and when I ever need his assistance he is more than willing to help me out so I guess I just depends on that particular man and how he chooses to treat his wife... My Hubby's grandmother is in her late sixties and she still cooks and cleans for EVERYONE!! She gets up and make tortillas everyday and she always has breakfast, lunch, and dinner at HOME no questions asked and she hardly ever wants others to help her.. So I think it all boils down to a cultural way of life.

Ashley - posted on 12/16/2010

My hubby is from mexico from the ranch life with dirt floors and outhouses and mostly dinner came from hunting or whatever.His mom had 8 kids got up 3 in the morning made tortillas -breakfast-washed clothes by hand took care of the smaller kids.My hubby was never raised with alot of love affection hugging kissing saying I love you alot mulitple times during the day.When we first were together over 5 years ago he was what they say very macho he would want dinner to be on the table everything handed to him on a sliver platter.Over the years I would say being with me and aroun my family is has became pretty americanized eating american foods he speaks soo much english now no problem there 9 months ago we had my daughter he's always wanted kids I couldnt even beileve he was and is so good with her he will bath her change her diaper feed her make bottles put her to sleep at night even on weekends when he is off he will get up with her in the morning and feed and change her and let me sleep even though i have never worked always been a stay at home mom.When he was younger he was kinda like that tryed to be in charge but we live mostly like normal people.i think it depends on the person and to whether they want to change or adapt to a new situation,some do some dont

Cierra - posted on 06/02/2010

well not all hispanic men are not like that let me clarify that..

my boyfriend is puertorican and our son is half black half puertorican..

and he cooks. cleans. and literally wait on my hands & foot .. (ha.. not all the time most of the time but im like 72% spoiled and its all due to him).. but alot of hispanic men are raised by mothers who are old fashioned, cooked cleans do everything the males want ! the women are often raised to be domestic ... i am far from that !

Jackie - posted on 05/31/2010

Most latin men are brought up that way. If hes American born then you should punch him in the face but just realize that most Spanish speaking countries the women is still suppose to be subserviant.

Jessica - posted on 05/30/2010

There are jerks in every race and color, not just Latino men. My daughters father started out being mr wonderful... then i got preggers....he turned into an ass (violent).... i left, had our daughter... he saw that i was not going to put up his crap (like he was used to women doing) and he now treats me like a queen and our daughter like a princess. Like some people do they will push your buttons til they see how far you are willing to bend...Just make it perfectly clear where you stand to avoid confusion later. I am sorry your daughter got one that thinks like that... one can only hope that he sees how unhappy he is making her and change or she gets tired of it and leaves.

Wendy - posted on 02/21/2010

The reason some spanish men are like u son in-law is cause his mom has raised him and him seen his mom do all multi task too.Example my grandmother raised my dad the same till this day.My cousin had a husband just like u son in-law.She ws doing evrything at home from taking care of the kids,cooking,laundry u name it.He never did food shopping at the market.He never did laundry.He end up cheating on her and the worst part the women his with now.She doesnt cook ,do not do laundry and more.Now he goes to the market,do her laundry and the reason why is this women didnt put out with it.It hurts my cousin to hear this.Sometime we as a wife need to be strong to our husband and say what we want and what we expect from them.

My husband is white .I had seem things in my family and the way spanish men wants a wife to be.I told my husband before we got marry I would do my best but you need to to the same.I told him my dad clean,cook,etc just like my mom did.If he dont like it honestly this relationship will not work .My husband told me his past relationship didnt work cause he expect the women to be just like his mom( is just a cycle )all over again.

Ashley - posted on 02/20/2010

not all are like that. my husband is from mexico he use to be really bad about it. i would work 36 hrs come home clean up his mess wash his clothes cook him breakfast fix his lunch. take my brother to high school 30 mins away. come home get ready for school take care of my momget about 4-5 hrs of sleep and do it all again. since i had our daughter we made a budget so i could stay home with our daughter and my mother. he helps take care of our daughter. helps me with my mother. i told him before we get married that my mother did that for my dad and he had an affair cause he didnt want a mother, i said if you want someone like your mother you dont need to marry me you need to go back to mexico and marry a mexican. now he helps with everything and i will tell you i do everything i can to make things easier on him because i want to now.

Ashley - posted on 01/17/2010

It depends how many generations of his family have grown up here. My husband is 1st generation here, but he swore that he would never be like his father. My husband works, helps around the house, and takes care of our son as much as he can. In a lot of hispanic cultures the women do all house work and take care of the kids, just like it was here years ago. Our cultures are very different and that is something that you have to learn to deal with. Some latino men just don't change and want to live like they are in their native lands. Now I will say that my husband still has his "latino" ways some, they are men! That is just how they are!

Kerry - posted on 01/14/2010

My hubby is colombian. His mom never taught him how to cook,do dishes ,clean, or do laundry....Although his dad does all of that and so does his mom. His mom does not belive boys should do it but she will let her husband..I do it all but I will not cook 7 days a week and he will take care of our kids if i have errands to run.His mom said i should teach im how to cook ect...I have kids to teach so im allset with teaching him...

Sara - posted on 01/14/2010

its not a latino thing, its how that man was raised. there are men of every race that act like complete idiots and think women are machines, i think a few jerks like the man you were talking about and my sons father who is mexican a bad name. My son hasnt seen his father since the day he was born he is two years old now so i know how your daughter feels cleaning cooking going to school and working im exhausted

Meena - posted on 01/14/2010

My husband is Mexican and are daughter is bi-racial. I'm a black and Dominican american female and I've visited Mexico a couple times. I believe it all depends on their up bringing. When my husband tried to act all macho, I checked his butt! He better not hit me..he must be crazy, and as far as taking care of and watching our baby..he has no choice because he's her father and plus he dosen't like to hear her cry.

Tabatha - posted on 01/14/2010

I do not think it has anything to do with being Latino, I think it is just the kind of person they are. My husband was born and raised in Mexico and he does not act like any of the men you are describing. He is a loving and caring father to our daughter, he respect me in all ways, and he takes on his share of the "house work". He is not a saint by any means but he definitly knows how to be an equal partner in our marriage. He does all this despite the fact that his father was an alcoholic who abandoned his mother and their five children.

Jan - posted on 01/14/2010

It's not that they aren't evolved. How many whites do you know that beat their wives or act like stupid pigs? It's everywhere. I am a white woman married to a hispanic man. He is wonderful and very supportive. It's not the race, it's how he was raised.

Clementine - posted on 01/13/2010

my fiance is puerto rican and he is not that way at all.. he helps around the house takes care of the children gets up with me in the morning when i leave for work earlier than he has to get up and makes me coffee and lunch to take with me to work...he has an evening job so when he is home during the day he takes care of the baby and makes sure my older daughter gets ready for school and on the bus.. guess im lucky..hope things work out for her

Lisa - posted on 01/13/2010

She married the wrong hispanic man (he's only spanish if he's actually from Spain). There are strong cultural differences between Americans and some hispanics, but your daughter should have been able to pick up on whether or not her soon to be husband had those viewpoints.
All I can say is, it's her marraige-is she happy? is it working for them? or is it just bothering you? If she does not have a problem with their living arrangement, then you should stay out of it, it's not for you to understand. If she is not happy, then she needs to try and change things with her husband or leave him.
I would be careful about using terms such as "are they evolved". Personally, I am offended by that statement. Your daughters husband may not be, but mine is. Her marrrying someone as you described reflects poorly on her judgement and evolution, and possibly how she was raised......

Anna - posted on 01/13/2010

My husband is Panamanian, and while I do the household cleaning, he is willing to cook. When I had a very stressful job (which I later quit), I didn't cook at all. He took over. When the household chores got to be too much, we did our best to hire a maid to help. My husband is not controlling, but he was never expected to do household chores growing up except taking out the garbage. His mother was fairly wealthy, and he grew up as an only child, and especially since he was a son, his mother made sure that everything was done for him. It is hard for him to break out of this mentality. However, when I really don't feel like doing the chores, I just leave them. If he gets disgusted enough, he helps out.

I think you need to be careful about stereotyping Latin men. They are not all the same. My husband appreciates that I have an education and helps me to find a job. He wants to support me so that I can get my Master's degree. He is not controlling at all.

As for telling your daughter to "stay out of the way," most psychologists encourage women to allow men their "guy time." However, if it becomes a situation where the "guy time" ends up undermining the marriage, then you have a problem. But it is a regular problem, not a cultural one. As for not watching his own child, this just makes him an asshole. It is true that my husband avoids changing diapers, but he will watch my daughter while I go to my tutoring job, and he knows how to make her food. When I first had my daughter, I thought that men were supposed to be incredibly helpful, changing diapers with me, sharing in all baby tasks, but not all men are like that. Those who want nothing to do with their children's care are just simply jerks, however.

Delilah - posted on 01/12/2010

Okay, first of all-what is important here is not what culture he is but what was missed during the dating period..Obviously the main responsibilites of what she/he expected from one another where never discussed-which is unfortunate because now the kids are a part of this. I have a question you say my daughter but your last name rings of latin descent as well, Isn't Martinez latino? I was just wondering because you can always turn to family for advice and ways to incorporate your independence and bring these issues of respect and equality to your husbands attention. It's not easy but it's not to late if you want this marriage to work-I am nothing more then an outsider giving (based on the info given) a perspective into your situation. Dealing with men who view women as the inferior or as the helper is tricky but not impossible. What you need to look out for is bitterness and hate that will stem from allowing this partnership to continue as such. I would seek as much encouragement from people I trust and learn as much as you can about why he feels the way he does-a clear understanding of why people think and act the way they do-can only help you and better prepare you for the challenges that will come. Good Bless you and your family and if all else fails, a simple prayer can do so much...

I did read the post of you saying that your mom was indeed the one who wanted to know about this situation-in any event-your mom can do research and if it bothers her that much, perhaps have a well thought out converstion with him-It is your marriage at the end of the day and if you can accept it then she could just support you and the kids that much more.

Jennifer - posted on 01/12/2010

Wow. Are they evolved? Holy cr@?. My hispanic husband is the only decent guy I've ever been with. And, I've been with just about every ethnicity out there.



PS- You sound about as uneducated as it gets.

Yana - posted on 01/12/2010

Are you talking about HISPANIC men or SPANISH men? I lived in Spain for some time and my husband is Spanish. Most Spanish men, including my husband, help out a lot at home and participate in all the domestic activities from cooking to bathing a baby. I am afraid you are misinformed.

Ariel - posted on 01/11/2010

i dont know my babies dad is mexican and he wanted me to do everything too. And didnt want me to work or go to school becuase he thought i would cheat on him or something...lol. Whatever though i'm sure not all hispanics or latinos are like that jus the stupid ones.

Vanessa - posted on 01/11/2010

Oh yes... a lot of Mexican men are like that. My hubby's father is one of those men.... oh boy! Fortunately hubby isn't like that... I checked any signs of that behavior quickly.

Rachel - posted on 01/05/2010

I am a white female engaged to a Cuban male and he is nowhere near any of that. Yes I do take care of our daughter, clean the house, and do the laundry but when he comes home he likes to spend time with his family and play with our daughter. He even cooks for us at least once a week if not more. When we go out, we go out as a family and I am always by his side. His friends know who I am and we talk all the time. I'm basically treated as an egual and he doesn't treat me like I am there to cater to his every need while he does nothing but go to work and come home and sit on his ass. I wouldn't put up with it if he did. I have dated men from quite a few different ethnic backgrounds and trust me it's more of how they are raised then their ethnic background.

Tammy - posted on 01/05/2010

Ok, first I need to say I am what you would call an American White woman and I am also married to a hispanic man. I also have an education, as does my husband. My husband dotes on me hand and foot and aside from God, the children and I are the center of his world. We have mutual friends and more often than not, when we go out, we go together. We are a blended family (I have 2 other children from a previous relationship - and their father was white) we also have one child together. My husband loves all 3 children equally and will care for them - whether I am home or not. I will also add that when I was with the father of my older children, he treated me much the same as your son in law treats your daughter. He didn't respect me in the least. Therefore, I must conclude that it is not your son in law's race that makes him that way, it's either a personality flaw or a result of his upbringing. Somewhere along the line, someone taught him that it's ok to treat women that way.

Nadine - posted on 01/05/2010

My husband is from Mexico City, and while his mother didn't teach him anything about cleaning, cooking or looking after children, he has proudly come a long way in that department... mostly on his own accord.

I am from Canada and have lived in Mexico City for 6 months now, culturally speaking, it is expected that women still leave high school and learn how to take care of their men and children. This IS changing, but slowly because it is so deeply rooted in their culture and beliefs and passed down from generation to generation.

A man can adapt no matter what race he is... if he wants to. If your daughter sticks to her guns like Becke said and if he is the kind of man that can be reasoned with, then he can learn. There are plenty of Canadian/American men out there that don't lift a finger too, just depends on if that is accepted behaviour or not.

Becke - posted on 01/03/2010

I am a white girl married to a Mexican man and I can say that they are not all that way. My husband started out thinking that I was supposed to work, cook, clean, and take care of the kids and he was just supposed to work. He learned REALLY quick that it was not how it worked if he wanted to stay with me. Not only am I not a great cook, but I cook mostly American food and if he wanted Mexican food, he was going to have to be the one to cook it. Also that I would do the cleaning and the laundry, but if he wanted it done differently than I did it, he could do it himself, and he does. When he cleans, it takes him all day and he still doesn't get as much done as I do in 2 hours! He does help me out with the kids now too since I work until 8pm and he has no choice but to pick them up from daycare, feed them, and get them ready for bed. I have also known many of his friends who are very "traditional" meaning the women do everything, but they don't usually end up with white girls unless they are willing to bend because a lot of white girls aren't willing to put up with their crap. Just trust that you have raised your daughter to do what is best for her and respect whatever decision that she makes. If things don't work out for some reason, you need to be there for her without judgment. If everything turns out fine, then great!

Traciy - posted on 12/15/2009

I am married to a Mexican male and I am African American. We have a forum dedicated to this topic on Facebook called Americans with Hispanic/Latinos. There is a strong friendship network of us over there. Consider joining today. http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=10...

Tammy - posted on 12/15/2009

In my experience, My EX-husband was EXACTLY the same way as your daughter's husband. I worked full-time, and as soon as I hit the door, I cleaned the house from top to bottom before I even changed my clothes! Then I cooked authentic Mexican food from scratch (which my ex-husband taught me to do) which took 3-4 hours depending on the meal. When My EX-husband came home from work, he would notice anything I HADN'T done (like fold the last load of laundry). He was VERY controlling, I wasn't "allowed" to wear shorts, or go to the store unaccompanied. He would go out drinking with his friends, and expected me to stay home. When I didn't he would physically abuse me. Needless to say, he is back in Mexico (where he can stay as far as I'm concerned), we are divorced, and I have SOLE physical and legal custody of our daughter with NO visitation.