whats up with Latino men?

Michelle - posted on 12/11/2009 ( 78 moms have responded )

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My daughter has this problem she is married to a spanish man. Please help me understand. I'm an american white female, raised to be independent and get a education. My husband does not expect me to cook, clean or do his laundry because I contribute to the household finances by working My son-inlaw expects my daughter to work, cook, clean, do the laundry and take care of the kids. When he is with his friends she has to stay out of the way because the wife doesn't do things like that. He won't watch his own child because the women are supposed to do that. I would like to know are they evolved?

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Keira - posted on 06/17/2013

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I'm a latina who no longer dates latin men. It's so strange, every time I fell in love with a latino, I ended up being in love by myself. Black men fall in love with me, white men fall in love with me but latin men just do not fall. I have no problem attracting them but as far as staying power, no. I was a great girl to them. Faithful, loving, supportive etc. Black guys and white guys equally have made me feel like I am the most amazing woman to walk this Earth. Roses, poems, romantic dates etc. But latino men always have some excuse. Either they are confused about their feelings, 'not ready for a relationship', "you're a great girl, you'll eventually find someone who likes you", I even had this guy try to soften the blow by dedicating me this bachata break up song that said "you're the perfect girl, just not in my world" I even had one tell me I was amazing but he "wanted to see what else was out there before he committed to anything" wow, really? The worst part is later I found out that a lot of these guys were capable of treating women like queens. They bent over backwards for the wrong women and 2 of them later came crying to me about it. Hate to admit it but with my experience with latin men is that they don't know how to appreciate a good woman until it is too late and I want someone who appreciates me now, not later. ♥ Happy with my white boyfriend right now.

Christian - posted on 07/22/2013

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A lot of generalizing going on here, not all of us Latino men are the way some describe us as. I don't expect a woman to cook, clean, take care of kids, stay at home or keep her from getting an education, I can do that on my own because every relationship should share responsibilities and yes education is very important, I don't expect a woman to stay home while I go out with my friends, yeah because to me my priority is the woman I'm with and not my friends, it has always been that way for me.
It all depends how that man was raised, it depends on his state of mind and if he decides to evolve from that caveman mentality his family drilled into his head, it depends on his education level and how open his mind is.
I agree with the original poster, some Latino men have not evolved because even I see some Latino men that way since they have an ass backward mentality. I live on my own at the time, I cook my own food, wash my own clothes, pay my own bills, clean my own apartment, to me a woman is not my property, yes I'm Latino and I know which country so therefore I don't need to constantly remind me or everyone else that "I'm Latino" I don't have alzheimers I know where I'm from, and whenever I've been in a relationship I treat my girlfriend like I would like to be treated, she is not my slave, I'm not her boss or owner, and yes there is a lot of love.
So please lets stop thinking that ALL Latino men are cavemen, there are a lot of us that have evolved.

Marie - posted on 01/18/2013

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Your daughter allows him to do whatever the hell he wants. Grow a backbone an tell him to get his fat mexican ass up and help out. hispanic men respond to one thing: abuse. She has already let him use her as a doormat and he figures she'll never leave cause they have kids. Get in his face, and say te chingo pendejo. That will wake him up

Lucy - posted on 07/31/2013

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I think it is mainly because your daughter is allowing this to happen. I am from Peru and my husband is Brazilian. He used to cook and clean the house. We both work, AND I am also a college student. We have two beautiful daughters and a Nanny. The Nanny takes care of the house chores completely and he is not against that. In fact, when we met I made it very clear that If he wanted to have a family with me that was going to be one of the conditions because I simply cannot cook or take care of a house by myself. The root of the issue is your daughter, I am sorry to say it like this.

Baby - posted on 01/17/2013

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This is my first post here but I have to agree with the original post. I also do not think the "have they evolved?" remark is racist, I think it's funny because I often think it about my own husband. I'm American white and he's 100% Puerto Rican. I call him "neanderthal" and "sasquatch" LOLOL and he agrees! "I'm puerto rican!" is his answer to everything!! I'm starting to understand that that actually means something LOL

Anyway, this topic does bring light to my own situation. We've been together for 7 years (married for one) and he is much like you described - he keeps me separate from his life, which has ALWAYS made me feel unimportant and outcasted. He doesn't spend a lot of time with friends or family, but what ticks me off is that they don't even say hi to me when we're walking down the street together. They acknowledge him only and he doesn't bother to introduce me. I'm actually relieved to find out that it may just be a cultural thing.
My former boyfriend was Ameri-rican and his people were much more accepting of me, they always made me feel included, never rejected like my husband's people do. I guess it's just customary to be ignorant???

As for "stereotyping"... the whole reason stereotypes exist is because the majority rules. But people still don't appreciate boldness.
My husband does in fact seem primitive. He doesn't want me in college, he wants me working to help support our finances. I try to explain to him that an education will get me a career, which is far better paying than a job.

I'm pregnant with our first and right now he's enchanted but with him everything wears off quickly. Soon he'll start yelping that I need to get a job so we can afford it.

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Catherine - posted 6 days ago

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Well,here is my answer to all of this, not all spanish men are created equal, my husband is Cuban and Eqadorian he was raised to respect by women. not to treat them second best. I have been with my husband for 6 years. I do work and and I come home to do housework, cook and spend time with our three dogs when we watch movies he likes to have me right next to him.He doesn't have another life with out. I am much older than him 19 years to be exact. I am truly in love with my latin man. I use to dated and married italian men, they cheated lied and beat me and got really fat. from eating too much pasta....So maybe you were just dating the wrong men in general I am in love with my husband maybe i just got lucky who knows.

Evolved - posted on 04/05/2014

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Warning: not the best grammatical structured response.

First generation Mexican American man born in the 80s and married for a decade now to a first generation Mexican American women born in the 80s.
Pros: Family orientated, support from core of friends, both educated from same alumni, traveled independently, career focused, spiritual connected, balanced-one emotionally high strung and the other mellow, planned parenthood for mid 30s, homeowners, have finances in order, planning for retirement, huge bucket list yet to accomplish from an individual and couple standpoint.
Cons: have had an equal amount of downs as ups. The ying and yang of this relationship is the good vs evil. As long as there is an equivalent in giving vs taking.
Ethnicity has not much to do with it if both assimilated to the dominant culture. Being part of a Class is a factor depending if you have crawled out of a disadvantage situation or have enhanced your middle class situation or been humbled, if your in the 1% elite. Last, ones own choice followed up by your decision are the factors. Opportunities will always present themselves life will only work out if committed.

The - posted on 01/09/2014

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Listen ladies, you guys are all wrong, stop saying latin men are this and that, fact of the matter is that there are good and bad men of all types and colors, and it may be a cultural thing or what not but, men do expect women to do all this house stuff, not saying that men shouldn't help but , this is mostly girly stuff, and men stick to the guys stuff, like the lawn, snow , cars, house repairs, don't get me wrong I think everything should be as equal at the end of the day, just know your boundaries, stick to your duties, respect your man and everything should be just fine, and remember do not make your man feel trapped, it's in our nature to be wild animals and please don't blame us for something that's out of our hands, just saying be smart and only be a hore with your man ONLY, remember there's two ways of getting into a mans heart and mind, food and sex, do this and we'll eat from the palm of your hand. P.S hope not to offend anyone by this, just trying to help.

Liana - posted on 12/20/2013

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Yeah my first husband was a fakexican (a Mexican only by blood American born and doesnt speak Spanish well or at all) but he got all the unwanted qualities of being a Mexican male from his father. Guess what no support .

Asia - posted on 12/20/2013

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Have they evolved is a good question.. I am African American and my husband is from Peru.. Im educated but after I had my second child I decided to stay home with my kids and take a break from working.. From the time we dated until recently, 2 1/2 yrs, it's been a partnership, equal, give or take, and no real signs of machismo.. Well recently I decided to help my husband prepare for a job interview that could really change our lives.. I wanted him to feel like he could succeed.. So I "wifed" it up big time.. I made him a big breakfast, I washed his clothes and ironed them for the interview, I updated his resume and went to kinkos to printut, I shaved him, and went with him to the interview because he wanted moral support and waited outside... Although I do nice things for him, cook, amd am a stay at hm mom,I've never spoiled him quite that much as I still make sure he does his part when... Well later in the day we were talking about what I had done for him with some of my family around. I jokingly said "was a wife to you today" and he looked at me and said "finally" and went back to playing video games... Ive never felt so unappreciated in my life! I did those things because I wanted to make him feel good and instead it made me feel stupid and powerless like I was chasing after a man which I don't want to be like... I want a partner.. While I think Hispanic may have changed to not force a woman to be the perceived notion of a wife, they probably still want it and expect it.. So no, I dont think they've evolved.

Cutemommy - posted on 10/17/2013

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A man will do only what the women allows no matter the color. Womanizers come in many races and sizes. Instead of blaming the man's culture. You should explain your daughters worth to her. The Men that women choose is a direct reflection of what she sees her self worthiness. So right now she feels that's what she deserves, I understand your angry but if you want any results you have to go about it a better way.

User - posted on 07/27/2013

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Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last month. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR Paul, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR Paul could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: altimatespelltemple@gmail.com. words are not be enough to express what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live........cyan

User - posted on 07/27/2013

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Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last month. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR Paul, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR Paul could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: altimatespelltemple@gmail.com. words are not be enough to express what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live........cyan

User - posted on 07/27/2013

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Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last month. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR Paul, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR Paul could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: altimatespelltemple@gmail.com. words are not be enough to express what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live........cyan

Joe - posted on 05/28/2013

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The latina women I've dated in the past all cheated on me had more than 2 boyfriends without me knowing.

Most latinas just want an excuse to date white guys cause want lighter babies that is all

Marsha - posted on 05/01/2013

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My husband is too needy. My kids and I are suffocating. Does anyone else have this problem?

Paige - posted on 03/18/2013

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Lol I don't think its cool that she can't do what she wants, she needs to stand up for herself. But I laugh because my babydaddy is peurtorican and Im 100 percent white as well, & I also realized everything he says ends with "I told you beja, Im peurtorican. It's because I'm peurtorican" :P Its so funny! Sasquatch & neanderthals cross my mind too haha but not in a racist or offensive way what so ever. Evolution is very unique, especially amongst different cultures in their own way, including white peoples.

DL - posted on 01/17/2013

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how would you like a husband who always says "white people". You do everything like white people. I get so mad at him, and say( not yell); what are you-black?! My husband is a very nice man who has a problem; even after many years of expressing himself. What he means is; not Latino. I remember when I had my first child. Things were less stressed-we were living everyday as best as we could. We made it. It was hard, but if you love your husband; you have to take EVERY DAY AT A TIME. With a Latino; some days may be unreal. However, I had a friend who was married to a Greek, and she had much worse problems.I think with every nationality; there are some problems. Its how you or your spouse were raised. My husband was raised in a poor family, but he remembers everyday how they lived; no matter what. Good Luck to you, and have perseverance-just keep trying. Every day is another beautiful day.

Courtney - posted on 01/17/2013

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I think it totally depends on how they were raised. My husband is Dominican and he was raised my his mother because his father left when he was young. I think all latin men have the machoness born into them and they see it growing up howver not all of them act on it.
I thought it would be interesting for all of you for me to mention that I wrote a book on meeting my latin husband when I was young in the Dominican Republic. My story is over the history of about seven years, I met him, visited, moved to his country, married and sponsored him to come to Canada. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and if you are interested I would love to share my experience with you! It is called "Deceitful Affection A True Story" and you can find it on lulu.com and other sites! It is short but you wont be able to put it down I promise!!

DL - posted on 01/08/2013

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I am an older white woman. I cannot give my name or anything else because of reasons. I have been married to a Latino for 43 years. My husband has his circle of "friends" he has had for a long time. I do not know them. My kids' are grown, but one lives in the same building as me. I have learned to accept being alone. My husband is gone every week end. He comes home to "check" on me; seemingly to see if I'm "alright". I have learned to live with this. On New Years' Eve; he has always stayed with his friends overnight, and I have always been at home alone. I have cooked,; he used to RARELY help me. He helps me clean sometimes, but the pain of lonliness never goes away. We never' now go out at all. His friends matter most to him, I guess. My daughter just accepts it also. Being married to a Latino is completely different, and it takes a lot of stamina, and many prayers.

Jessica - posted on 01/03/2013

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Well this is not all Hispanic men.. I ask you this question, have you evolved? You based this on one man and act as if all Hispanic men are this way. I am married to a Hispanic man who has his Master's degree and works for a big 4 accountant firm, he helps around the house, and is a great father.

Leanne - posted on 12/06/2012

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my ex is Hispanic and is the stereotypical Hispanic man with kids from multiple "baby mammas" and doesn't take care of any of them...BUT not all Hispanic men are like that there are plenty of white men, Asian men, African American men, etc that do the same thing the common denominator is the "men" aspect and we as woman choose to either put up with it and do everything or choose to change it I was in that relationship for a long time and just realized over the last year or so that it was my fault to for allowing him to not be involved with anything and now that I have taken him court and made him take responsibilities, he has changed for the better and doing more for my son I had to take a step back and make him realize that im not that woman who is going to do everything for him

Jen - posted on 12/05/2012

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I agree totally with Cynthia, Thats why I married a american man as well. Not all mexican or latino guys are like that but most are that are raised in a traditional family or raised in another country other than the usa. I was with my ex for 5 years and could never adjust to his way of life, I was not allowed to go to school, get a job, and he even said what I could wear. I was to clean the house and make food. He wanted kids but this was not the life for me so we separated. Once again no all people are like this, put this is the typical type =) hope this helps.

Cynthia - posted on 12/05/2012

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I´m mexican and many (not all) mexican guys are like that, maybe that's why I married an american man! This behavior is part of their education, they repeat patterns they see in their homes, the mothers of this "machos" are the most responsable. But you can re-educate them, you just have to be very clear in what you expect from them, because your family is different and you want to educate your kids differently.

Carolina - posted on 12/03/2012

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well to tell you Im Hispanic women do everything do laundry, cook, clean house take care the kids and etc.. men seems that is our job to do everything but sometimes men do help out men are different depends who you marry

Juan - posted on 12/02/2012

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I think it's just a cliche, because even american Dads are macho dominants like "Homer Simpson" you see what I mean? Just because I watch The Simpsons and see how Homer treats his wife it doesn't mean that every american dad in the USA do the same thing to ther wives. What I do perceive is that american women behave a bit arrogant because of their cultural background and "pretend" to be the "super model american hollywood mum" thinking that in Latin american, mums stay at home and do nothing more than that...Get over that idea! you are wrong american ladies, Latin american women do study, work and raise children at the same time too!.

Fatai - posted on 11/08/2012

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My name is Allen Spencer I am a Canadian i want to shear my testimony, I was married to my husband for nine years before he left for another woman it was so bad that it affect my job to shorten the story it all ended when I meet with a great spiritualist who prayed for me. In relationships we need a lot of spiritual help he told me my problems and they where all true he prayed for me and after three days my husband who had abandoned me for two years already came to my door with some red rose flower asking me to take him back we talk for some time concerning his new wife, he agreed to leave her after two weeks we renewed our wedding vows and we are happy together if you want to contact the spiritualist you can contact him personally through prophetfatai@gmail.com or his temple for help on prophetfataispiritualtemple@gmail,com. he is a father figure with great powers his temple is a home of solution.

Tara - posted on 10/07/2012

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I can tell you I am an american woman that is in my second marriage to a Honduran man and in my experience with my friends and husband the women DO SERVE THEIR MEN! I am going through issues at this moment for the same reason. we have been married for 7 years now and honestly I am tired of it! Now dont get me wrong there are some who are not that way but the Majority ARE! it is the MACHO culture even when you go to baby showers, or children s birthdays they will have beer and men will be there drinking and normally separate from the women. all women will get together and help serving everyone and doing all clean up. This is not bashing the culture because I think there are also things that are beautiful about the culture but also I think that the men should have a little compromise when the choose to marry an american woman and adapt to our cultures like we do to theirs! Both of my experiences were the same in that aspect also almost ALL of my friends are from Mexico, Guatemala, El Salvador, or Honduras and the concisenes is the same in each one the women all agree too but they are from a place where divorce is not an option.

Rachel - posted on 01/11/2011

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My husband is Puerto Rican and he is not this way, for the most part. We both work fulltime and we also both do all of the cleaning, cooking,and childcare. I guess I am lucky because most of the other men in his family are not like him. His dad is really bad. His dad was so bad that he didn't want to talk about anything that had to do with money in front of me either because "money is not women's business," my husband would tell him that it is not this way in our house and considering I make 3 times what my husband makes, it is my business. My father in law will not do anything for himself, she does it all. I guess it all depends on the individual and how he was raised but as you can see from my husband sometimes that doesn't predict anything either.

Breana - posted on 01/01/2011

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My husband is puerto rican. We have 3 kids together and he is the best man i have ever met. I get sick alot so sometimes he helps out with the dishes, the kids and cleaning more than i do and still has to go to work in the morning, so they're not all like that:)

Lavet - posted on 01/01/2011

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OMG!!!! I think by saying "they" some of you guys are generalizing and being racist! Was he like this before your daughter chose to marry him? Or did he beat her and force her to marry him? Maybe it's how he was raised. My husband is Latino and is very respectful of me. He was also respectful of me while we were dating and I knew his values and beliefs before hand.

Iysha - posted on 12/26/2010

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lol....when i told my grandma that my fiance likes to cook, she said that her husband NEVER set foot in the kitchen unless it was to eat! haha...In Mexican Culture, men work, women take care of the home...that is way old fashioned though...my other grandmother thought I should have been married at 16 and wanted me to move in with her to take care of her when she was sick...I was 16...i didnt know how to cook, I didnt even know how to work the dishwasher or the washer/dryer back then. lol.

I grew up with my mom cooking and cleaning and doing laundry and I do that too...not because I have to or my fiance expects it...just because that was what my mom did. i suppose it would be the same for men...their fathers did it and they are modeling their behavior. i like cooking and If i dont feel like cooking, i can order a pizza. lol...no biggie. I do laundry and that doesnt bother me, i am the primary caregiver for our daughter and i dont mind as long as when I need help or want to go do something without her I can count on him to take care of her. I used to work, not right now but i will be returning to school, and i will still be cooking, cleaning and doing laundry...that doesnt meant that my fiance wont put in a load of laundry if I ask him to. He grew up with a single mom so he knows how to cook and clean and all that...in fact he does all 3 better than me and taught me how to use the washer/dryer and how to cook without burning something.

It is really just the way people are brought up that make them the partners that they are and it is the way they are brought up that makes them expect cirtain things of their partner.

Jackie - posted on 12/26/2010

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Okay so instead of bashing her for answering an honest question maybe you should ask her a question. Theres no need to be rude. Even in times past in white American history the woman was expected to do it all and more and we white american women say that they have evolved so before everybody goes judging her lets think about that. Just because white people refer to other races in the same way that we do our own race doesnt mean were racist.
To answer your question hun not all hispanic men treat their women the same. My ex husband was mexican and treated me worse than your explaining and was physically violent to me as was his father to his mother and step mother. A friend of mines mother was with a mexican for 20 years then a Honduran for 2 and they both beat her.
Now before anybody says that is racist I will also say that my first abusive relationship was with a white man and if a mans going to beat you it dont matter what race he is.
Alot of hispanic cultures the woman is literally the house mother as you described. Not all of them are that way so you just have to know not only where theyre from but how they were raised.

Destini - posted on 12/21/2010

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I personally believe they are this way because that's how they were raised up. My Hubby is Hispanic and he does not treat me the way your son-in-law treats your daughter but I still do all the house work.. I am a stay at home mom so I dont think its a big deal that I cook, clean, and tend to my child! HOWEVER if and when I ever need his assistance he is more than willing to help me out so I guess I just depends on that particular man and how he chooses to treat his wife... My Hubby's grandmother is in her late sixties and she still cooks and cleans for EVERYONE!! She gets up and make tortillas everyday and she always has breakfast, lunch, and dinner at HOME no questions asked and she hardly ever wants others to help her.. So I think it all boils down to a cultural way of life.

Ashley - posted on 12/16/2010

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My hubby is from mexico from the ranch life with dirt floors and outhouses and mostly dinner came from hunting or whatever.His mom had 8 kids got up 3 in the morning made tortillas -breakfast-washed clothes by hand took care of the smaller kids.My hubby was never raised with alot of love affection hugging kissing saying I love you alot mulitple times during the day.When we first were together over 5 years ago he was what they say very macho he would want dinner to be on the table everything handed to him on a sliver platter.Over the years I would say being with me and aroun my family is has became pretty americanized eating american foods he speaks soo much english now no problem there 9 months ago we had my daughter he's always wanted kids I couldnt even beileve he was and is so good with her he will bath her change her diaper feed her make bottles put her to sleep at night even on weekends when he is off he will get up with her in the morning and feed and change her and let me sleep even though i have never worked always been a stay at home mom.When he was younger he was kinda like that tryed to be in charge but we live mostly like normal people.i think it depends on the person and to whether they want to change or adapt to a new situation,some do some dont

Cierra - posted on 06/02/2010

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well not all hispanic men are not like that let me clarify that..

my boyfriend is puertorican and our son is half black half puertorican..

and he cooks. cleans. and literally wait on my hands & foot .. (ha.. not all the time most of the time but im like 72% spoiled and its all due to him).. but alot of hispanic men are raised by mothers who are old fashioned, cooked cleans do everything the males want ! the women are often raised to be domestic ... i am far from that !

Jackie - posted on 05/31/2010

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Most latin men are brought up that way. If hes American born then you should punch him in the face but just realize that most Spanish speaking countries the women is still suppose to be subserviant.

Jessica - posted on 05/30/2010

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There are jerks in every race and color, not just Latino men. My daughters father started out being mr wonderful... then i got preggers....he turned into an ass (violent).... i left, had our daughter... he saw that i was not going to put up his crap (like he was used to women doing) and he now treats me like a queen and our daughter like a princess. Like some people do they will push your buttons til they see how far you are willing to bend...Just make it perfectly clear where you stand to avoid confusion later. I am sorry your daughter got one that thinks like that... one can only hope that he sees how unhappy he is making her and change or she gets tired of it and leaves.

Wendy - posted on 02/21/2010

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The reason some spanish men are like u son in-law is cause his mom has raised him and him seen his mom do all multi task too.Example my grandmother raised my dad the same till this day.My cousin had a husband just like u son in-law.She ws doing evrything at home from taking care of the kids,cooking,laundry u name it.He never did food shopping at the market.He never did laundry.He end up cheating on her and the worst part the women his with now.She doesnt cook ,do not do laundry and more.Now he goes to the market,do her laundry and the reason why is this women didnt put out with it.It hurts my cousin to hear this.Sometime we as a wife need to be strong to our husband and say what we want and what we expect from them.

My husband is white .I had seem things in my family and the way spanish men wants a wife to be.I told my husband before we got marry I would do my best but you need to to the same.I told him my dad clean,cook,etc just like my mom did.If he dont like it honestly this relationship will not work .My husband told me his past relationship didnt work cause he expect the women to be just like his mom( is just a cycle )all over again.

Ashley - posted on 02/20/2010

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not all are like that. my husband is from mexico he use to be really bad about it. i would work 36 hrs come home clean up his mess wash his clothes cook him breakfast fix his lunch. take my brother to high school 30 mins away. come home get ready for school take care of my momget about 4-5 hrs of sleep and do it all again. since i had our daughter we made a budget so i could stay home with our daughter and my mother. he helps take care of our daughter. helps me with my mother. i told him before we get married that my mother did that for my dad and he had an affair cause he didnt want a mother, i said if you want someone like your mother you dont need to marry me you need to go back to mexico and marry a mexican. now he helps with everything and i will tell you i do everything i can to make things easier on him because i want to now.

Ashley - posted on 01/17/2010

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It depends how many generations of his family have grown up here. My husband is 1st generation here, but he swore that he would never be like his father. My husband works, helps around the house, and takes care of our son as much as he can. In a lot of hispanic cultures the women do all house work and take care of the kids, just like it was here years ago. Our cultures are very different and that is something that you have to learn to deal with. Some latino men just don't change and want to live like they are in their native lands. Now I will say that my husband still has his "latino" ways some, they are men! That is just how they are!

Kerry - posted on 01/14/2010

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My hubby is colombian. His mom never taught him how to cook,do dishes ,clean, or do laundry....Although his dad does all of that and so does his mom. His mom does not belive boys should do it but she will let her husband..I do it all but I will not cook 7 days a week and he will take care of our kids if i have errands to run.His mom said i should teach im how to cook ect...I have kids to teach so im allset with teaching him...

Sara - posted on 01/14/2010

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its not a latino thing, its how that man was raised. there are men of every race that act like complete idiots and think women are machines, i think a few jerks like the man you were talking about and my sons father who is mexican a bad name. My son hasnt seen his father since the day he was born he is two years old now so i know how your daughter feels cleaning cooking going to school and working im exhausted

Meena - posted on 01/14/2010

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My husband is Mexican and are daughter is bi-racial. I'm a black and Dominican american female and I've visited Mexico a couple times. I believe it all depends on their up bringing. When my husband tried to act all macho, I checked his butt! He better not hit me..he must be crazy, and as far as taking care of and watching our baby..he has no choice because he's her father and plus he dosen't like to hear her cry.

Tabatha - posted on 01/14/2010

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I do not think it has anything to do with being Latino, I think it is just the kind of person they are. My husband was born and raised in Mexico and he does not act like any of the men you are describing. He is a loving and caring father to our daughter, he respect me in all ways, and he takes on his share of the "house work". He is not a saint by any means but he definitly knows how to be an equal partner in our marriage. He does all this despite the fact that his father was an alcoholic who abandoned his mother and their five children.

Jan - posted on 01/14/2010

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It's not that they aren't evolved. How many whites do you know that beat their wives or act like stupid pigs? It's everywhere. I am a white woman married to a hispanic man. He is wonderful and very supportive. It's not the race, it's how he was raised.

Clementine - posted on 01/13/2010

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my fiance is puerto rican and he is not that way at all.. he helps around the house takes care of the children gets up with me in the morning when i leave for work earlier than he has to get up and makes me coffee and lunch to take with me to work...he has an evening job so when he is home during the day he takes care of the baby and makes sure my older daughter gets ready for school and on the bus.. guess im lucky..hope things work out for her

Lisa - posted on 01/13/2010

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She married the wrong hispanic man (he's only spanish if he's actually from Spain). There are strong cultural differences between Americans and some hispanics, but your daughter should have been able to pick up on whether or not her soon to be husband had those viewpoints.
All I can say is, it's her marraige-is she happy? is it working for them? or is it just bothering you? If she does not have a problem with their living arrangement, then you should stay out of it, it's not for you to understand. If she is not happy, then she needs to try and change things with her husband or leave him.
I would be careful about using terms such as "are they evolved". Personally, I am offended by that statement. Your daughters husband may not be, but mine is. Her marrrying someone as you described reflects poorly on her judgement and evolution, and possibly how she was raised......

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