Women who don't trust their baby daddies

Lysette - posted on 11/29/2010

@BB Thompson, she wasn't talking about you.. You're acting like she is personally attacking you!!

Linda - posted on 11/27/2010

haha- im aussie and my partners asian. the looks i get from asian women - its unbelieveable it actually makes me laugh.but i can understand your frustration- just laugh it off , they are the ones who are weird for acting that way.

Xandria - posted on 11/26/2010

@ BB, the shoe has been on the other foot I have dealt with several narrow minded people that seem to assume that just because my husband and I are out together we are just friends or ignore me completely. To quote several waitresses "This is separate, right?" Emphasis on the word separate. I have even watched as a waitress kept sticking her chest out and flirting with my husband in order to get a better tip and I always find it funny. Never once have I gotten jealous or stared the woman down because she was flirting with my husband. In a way it's kind of flattering that they find him attractive. The most I have ever been is annoyed and that was because it was taking her too long to take the order to the kitchen because she was flirting too hard and I wanted to eat. So NO I see no reason to get so jealous and do not understand the mentality. And for me the thing is this. WW seem to spend way more time bad mouthing BW and it almost makes me wonder why they even decided to be with a BM if they are so jealous. Are they this way when they are with WM or do they just seem to be especially overboard because they have some sort of insecurity issue that they can't seem to work out. Also when I'm at work I'm at work, as far as I'm concerned Black, White, Male or Female I answer any question in the shortest most precise fashion that I can because most questions that I get in a day are stupid ones that people could answer for themselves if they bothered to read half the signs that are posted around the building. I am usually too pissed to pay either of them much more attention than a curt point in the direction they need to go. And if even if they don't know I am married t a WM if they weren't so busy giving me the evil eye they would see the wedding band and engagement ring on my finger which means that regardless of who I was with I have my own man and don't want theirs. And the type of women that I am talking about seem to have no issue with their SO talking to my white female co-workers. This isn't about stereotyping this was a vent/rant after a difficult week of dealing with several particularly stupid people. Stupidity is stupidity, regardless of the race you are. I have female friends of different races who are married or dating men of different races and I personally believe you should love whom you love, however if you really love them then you should be able to accept everything about them, not do the whole, he's great except.... And that's what it seems to be to me in most of the cases that I have experienced. It's almost as if the guy cheated with a BW it would be 1000 times worst than if she were white instead of it being bad, period, end of story. If you can't trust your man that should be your problem, don't put it on anyone else except for him, and if there is a particular race that you seem primarily focused on him cheating with then you might want to think about why you feel this way. That is my point.

BB - posted on 11/10/2010

uuuhh ohhh a ww vs bw thread-lol
I'm a WW married to a BM and well...frankly I dont know about anyone else but my hubby can converse with whomever he pleases...I have no worries in this department b/c I Know what type of person I married or else there is no way in hell I would of said "I DO"
and I know my baby is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to smart then to give up what we have built together by means of a moment of disrespect. So as for me I have no worries in this department.Have you tried looking at this from another point of view..ie..Are you more focused on the BM when you are discussing topics and maybe you are causing these women to feel uncomfortable as if you are not attending to their needs pertaining your position in a library?B/C I know from my own exp. I've been in quite a few places like resturants where a BW was waiting on my hubby and myself and the waitress acted like I was not relevant or couldn't make my own choices and spoke only to my husband...b/c he was a bm...asked for his drink order and acted like she didn't hear mine. same with app/ food.well she chose the wrong one and I got a free meal and the next time I went back there I didn't recall seeing her...I'm not saying that ww cant or aren't the same way but I am conveying info pertinent to this topic.As a BW then you more then likely aware of the stereotypes surrounding WW/BM unions such as, the WW must be uneducated, docile, weak minded and insecure and jelous.Anyone can be this way in any race/ethnicity or social standing. It depends on the individual...just like the stereotypes surrounding BW/WM unions are not always true like that WM want them only for booty, or that BW only want WM for money, upgrade in social class or have security that their own "communities" never provided. I know these are stereotypes on both sides and do not buy into them...esp. when it comes to women, b/c there are many diff types of women and women act diff in diff situations as there are many diff personality types.Also there is noway for these women to know that you are married to a WM unless you wear a badge that says my hubby is white...maybe like I said maybe those women aren't jelous maybe they think you are being rude. no offense.Also do you think BW get "jelous" if you are focusing on their hubby/man?Sorry but it just appears like there must be alot of free time at the library if your focusing on this...I thought people at librarys are supposed to be organizing the card catalogs and putting away/checking out books for library guests.As a person in an interracial relationship you should know how it can feel for people in these types of relationships and how sometimes people in these relationships can feel uncomfortable in certain situations, you should not be perpetuating these stereotypes in your everyday life...b/c what if the shoe was on the other foot.And I made a thread about how all the white men I know have BW who complain whenever they talk to a WW and at my job it just seems like all the BW who have white significant others come in and are jelous when their man talks to me and I dont have time to be as jelous as them and it seems like all of those BW are insecure....lol...racism as unsignificant as it may appear is still ugly so lets play nice and not peretuate stereotypes.

Kelly - posted on 11/04/2010

I have had the same problem just reverse. I am white and my hubby is black. When we were pregnant there was one nurse at the dr's office that acted like my husband couldn't understand english because he was black. She would always ask if we wanted the "other" nurse to make sure that everything was explained to us. At first I said sure because I thought maybe she was new and was offering someone with more exp. But then I realized what the issue was when she sent the black nurse in. I mean, really?! And my own sister in law made some stupid comments to me about "getting an interpreter" because she "didn't speak white". WTF is that?? As far as these women who you are running into..they would just be insecure no matter what. If you have a good relationship with your man than it doesn't matter who he is around. I have had stupid girls say "Oh don't leave him around me. He'll go back to black". Whatever....