Feeling hopeless...any advice?

Brittney - posted on 05/23/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My son is 8 years old and still soiling his pants. I took him to a doctor considering the idea that it might be encopresis. The doctor said that since he can control his bowel movements it was most likely not. I then took him to a psychologist thinking something may be bothering him, but nothing ever came about with that.
I have grounded him to the bathroom telling him that he can play with friends/video games/ get on the computer after he has gone to the bathroom. Not even 5 minutes later he would do his deed in the toilet. We have taken away toys/xbox/computer/outside (which I really don't like to do and only do as a last resort) and it still happens. He says he does it because he doesn't feel like going to the bathroom. He often stinks (takes 2-3 showers a day even), has ruined clothes, has been sent home from school because of it, and now teased. We have found him hiding his clothes, lying about it and will even say he doesn't care that he walks around in it or smells. I told him that if he does it again he will be grounded from everything for a month. We had a long discussion about it and for the last couple days he was doing well. Now he's done it again after playing outside all day. I feel lost and it feels as though nothing we do fixes the situation.
Has anyone experienced something like this? When will it end? We are frustrated and worried about him. Should I follow through with grounding him for a month? It seems when he has nothing better to do he will go to the bathroom...but once he's ungrounded it happens all over again.

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Dora - posted on 05/24/2012

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Just from what I have seen with other children, I would recommend hiding a digital recorder in his backpack and see what is going on with him either at school or when he is with other children. This may be his way of acting out even though nothing came out of the visit with the psychologist. Give it a try. It worked for the other parents. They found out what was going on with their children that was causing them to act out. I hope everything works out for you all.

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