Double Whammy - divorced last year and now an empty nest with youngest in college

Linda - posted on 09/09/2012

Hi, well your child just left for college. So, take the time for yourself to find out who you are. Yeah, it's hard. Your child is still living with you, but it is a drastic change. They miss being home, but want to live on their own and be independent too. You need to get involved in activities for you.



I know that sounds cliche, but I am going through something also. I left an abusive marriage in December and have been on my own since. I moved with my 22 year old son who was a senior in college. It was extremely hard living alone. He went out of state, so I was living alone for the first time in 25 years. My 20 year old daughter stayed with her father and is now living in new york with relatives, we have issues and can't live together. It is weird and lonely being alone. But, you get used to it. At first you may feel you have to fill your whole day so you aren't alone. But, you need to deal with living alone, and you will learn to enjoy it at times.



My son recently graduated and we are considering moving to the state where he graduated from. Much slower pace, I need a change. Now, again I feel I am not ready to live on my own permamently, but if I have to I will. We need each other to get on our feet right now. But, he is an adult, and I have to learn and remember that. Because no matter what we do, sometimes we forget that. I love my son, but know this will be a short term arrangement and i have to get on with my own life.



I don't know if you are dating yet. But, joining a dating site, a church, book club. All ideas to meet people (not just to date, but women) and to keep busy. Before you know it, you won't be focusing on the empty nest as much. If you really need someone to talk to, counseling may be a good idea. Hope this helped.

Michelle - posted on 08/22/2012

Honestly empty nest means you are free to do as you please, I would take a course or join a singles club get out there meet new people and who knows where things will go.