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Drr off to college Empty "Grand Canyon" Nest

Kimberly - posted on 06/16/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I'm sitting here AGAIN in my bathrobe that even "pig pen" would refuse! I need to get up from this keyboard and start packing boxes for our supposed "exciting" move for my husbands job to a whole new state. We're moving in 2 wk's & I have NOT packed one thing but EVERYDAY I pinky swear to get a whole rm done and another day goes by untouched. I spiral more in to shame & silence from all who surround me with their "happy for me" voices.Our ddr graduated with high honors was accepted into N.Y.U. and of course there is NO who is prouder of her than me. There is also no ONE more shocked @ this deep depression that has set in like a cement blanket.So I am trying in the sincerest way to "buck up" and accept she's leaving across country for 4 years and I won't wake up to her beautiful face anymore. And I'm moving out of Ca from our families where I've lived my entire life to a whole to state, Scottsdale, Az. where there's this new chapter of life I'm stepping in to. I'm sure to MOST of you are thinking "wow we should all have it so bad, what an ungrateful, whiny"... Oh believe me no one can say anything close to what I tell myself everyday to "snap out of it". I am just hoping, no praying someone will tell there's not something wrong with me or maybe there is but there are things I can do to crawl out of this. I NEED to function! I WANT to celebrate my ddr and this new chapter that's ahead for my husband and I so if writing some words out that may or may not make sense leads to some hope ~ Thank you!

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Lori - posted on 04/23/2012

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You make total sense. Most of us have been there in verying degrees. I have had 3 kids leave in 4 years. Tough. When our daughter left I vowed to fill her mailbox with cards so she would know that she was still loved and missed. Went shopping the next day. No such cards existed. I ended up creating some. It is so fantastic to encourage them when they are away. All kids have kept every card. They have been a big hit. Now I am passionate about encouraging College moms. We need it. It does get better. School breaks help. If you think you might like to stay in touch with and encourage your baby with cards...I put mine on a website and love to share. All the best, Lori

http://myseedsoffaith.com/

Jerra - posted on 06/26/2011

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I also have over achieving children! I just sent my son to west point this morning. I'm sending my daughter to ucla in just a few short months. I cannot stop crying ( sobbing!!!) all I can think about are all of the memories of them as kids! I'm 37 years old and I am going to be an empty nester. I'm depressed and exhausted. I seriously want a time machine! I don't know why I keep crying at the most random times!!!? I miss my son already and it's only been a few hours. I almost passed out as he turned away and rode up the escalator to his terminal. He turned around and waved and I just lost it. I keep replacing it over and over. I don't know who I am if I'm not raising kids, planning events for them or being team mom. I thought about seeing a therapist but I get angry with myself for even thinking of it!?! I do have a full time job but I have summers off. There are so many things on my list that I want to do this summer but I feel guilty because my son won't be here to do them with us. Is his normal? We've taken family vacations every summer except for this one! Everytime I hear music it reminds me of one of the places that weve vacationed. I just can't listen to it anymore. I walk down the hallway and see my kids photos and get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I want to do it all over again. I don know how I'm going to get through this.... Any suggestions?

Kimberly - posted on 06/25/2011

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Oh excellent! I will look it up and purchase it ASAP!
Thank you so much for responding, I greatly appreciate it.
Kimberly

Sharon - posted on 06/24/2011

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I bought an excellent book called Barabara and Susan's guide to the Empy Nest. You will read stories of other women that are feelling the same way you are and what helped them. It talks about the relationship with your kids at this time, your husband and yourself.

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