Help... Inattentative ADD

Ragan - posted on 03/26/2011

Hi, My daughter is almost 11 and was daignosed a year ago. My daugter sounds a lot like yours very imaginitive and caring. Tate is also very emotional and sensitive, we were a little put off by medicating our daugter too but her school was suffering so bad. She would just get up in the middle of class and walk around, she wasn't absorbing anything because she didn't focus. So we did medicate, honestly it took a while to find the right one, Adderall didn't work out, but we have found one after trying a few and she is doing great. Although what the doc says does seem a bit harsh, all kids are different and you can't be with her all the time to help her focus. It is hard to see your child struggle so much, I hope it works out well for you :)
Ragan

Amber - posted on 12/27/2010

that put that on my daughter , and all i can say is dont bc the side effects were horrible, and she became not her self and they are coming off of it its an emontial wreck, im trying to find a natural something to help her bc reading the story and my husband own storys and the long term effects are bad, but i wasnt sure if er made the right choose bc we too wanted to help her in school but it mazde it to were the teacher would say "she doing great, paying attention , and so BUT she really emonital over and over that all i hear and she had like a physco moment that was scary for me to watch that i told my hubby that was it ,and the meds are physcotrophic (sp) meds, which my disabled clients are on and it horrible for them at thier age....... it needs to be your choice, there are others ways to help ive been trying other stuff and its helping .....go with you gut, bc yes she will do better in school, but if it takes away from her personality is it worth it ...hope i could help soem how

Karen - posted on 11/27/2010

What a horrible and negative thing for a doctor to say! You can tutor her 24/7 and she would just get more and more frustrated? I would have walked out on that doctor and never gone back. Maybe HE can't show patience and encouragement to a child with problems focusing, but it's possible!
We do not medicate my daughter. She is in 5th grade now and doing just fine. Well, fine for a child with ADHD. There are "tricks" to getting them to do their work and understand it. #1 is patience, #2 is encouragement and #3 is knowing when to back off and give them a break. I found the years through and including 3rd grade to be the worst. After than some maturity sets in and it does get easier.
It does take longer for dd to do school work, but not because I make her sit there and do it all at once. Overall it doesn't take her longer . But we take breaks. Things like "do just the math" or "work on math for 15 minutes and then we'll take a break" or "... then you can go to dance and do more later." Other tricks like letting dd dictate long answers to me and me typing them (as of this year she types well enough that she can do it herself.) Things like drawing or demonstrating concepts so that she can see them and understand.
Personally I do not find ADHD to be a disability. My older daughter has ADHD with hyperactivity and her energy and imagination and constant go-go-go are all great things that will take her far in life if we teach her how to use it.
Myself -I am ADHD inattentive type and I do sometimes wonder my younger daughter has that too (but since it is not affecting her school work other than comments that she works too slow, I haven't.) I spent my life hearing (and sometimes still do) "not working to potential" "daydreamer" but you know what? Those daydreams and imagination are something to be encouraged! There would be no innovations and inventions without imagination. Again, something that is a gift for a person and should be encouraged and trained ... not listening in class is not a good thing, but it is so easy for a teacher to bring a child "back" to the classroom with a tap on the desk or catching their eye.
The problem is not children with ADHD, the problem is the way they are taught. And I will tell you that I have found that just because 1 teacher is not good at dealing with a child who doesn't fit in their nice little box, doesn't mean next teacher won't be good. For my daughter, Kindergarten was a disaster. 1st was really good. 2nd was really good. 3rd was a frustrating mess. 4th was wonderful. 5th is proving to be a huge challenge but dd has a great teacher who is firm yet caring and while grades are below potential, overall she is doing great. It's not the school work, but the teacher that makes the difference.

I know I'm odd in that I see ADHD as a good thing. I don't view it as a disability ... it is a challenge to tame. Meds can be a useful tool in gaining control and taming, but it see too many who view ADHD as a disease that MUST be medicated. Heaven forbid we treat the child as an individual and help them work their best! What I tell people all the time is that schools don't have the time or patience to work with anyone who thinks outside the box. They want children who are easy and who don't question or challenge. I don't see much difference between school and a Borg cube ... and all our children must be assimilated. I will not comply.

Robbin - posted on 11/26/2010

Chrissy,
I was very apprehensive about giving my daughter medicine at 6. She was diagnosed and my husband was deployed at the time and I felt the whole world was resting on my shoulders! She is now almost 11! Yikes!
Getting her on medicine has helped her so much! Biggest thing that will help with school is to talk them about it. Get her an IEP that will help her get the help she needs at school. For example, sitting closer to the teacher so he/she can help her stay on task. Also there are aides that can help too. My daughter and another child in her class have one, and he is great! He helps all the students so the kids that he really is there for don't feel singled out. What he does for my daughter is keep her mind on what it is she is supposed to be doing. The IEP is a great thing too if she is struggling with her work, it will allow the school to modify her education, enough to keep her encouraged but also still be able to challenge her enough.
My daughter also gets weight checks every 90 days. We have tried not taking her medicine during the summer and the weekends. It was very hard on both of us and very frustrating for my husband. Originally she was taking Strattera, took that for a little over a year when it seemed to not have any affect any more. She now takes Adderall, 3x a day during the school week and 2x a day on the weekends. Bedtime can still be s struggle and first thing in the morning too.
Like Kimberley mentioned, you just have to find what works for your daughter. When you do find it and she gets excited because she tells you about how great her day went, you'll know it!
Robbin

Kimberley - posted on 11/04/2010

Chrissy,

The diagnosis is scary and then when they say to medicate your baby, it sucks! I was dead set against the medication part when my daughter was first identified by her 2nd grade teacher as possibly ADHD. In part I think it was the way her teacher approached me about it, so I put it off for a whole year before I even started the testing process. When she was officially diagnosed in 3rd grade, I was still against the medicine and held onto the filled prescription for almost 2 months before I finally started her on it. After about the third day, she came running off the bus and said "Mommy, I finished all more work today!" I almost cried. I went from being totally against medicine to being whole-heartedly for it for all the ways it helped my daughter feel better about herself and school. That being said, you have to find the right medicine. My daughter was started on Concerta which helped her pay attention in school but after about a month led to very strong side effects for her in terms of not eating, sleeping and anger. I pulled her off them for the summer and before the school year went back to talk to her doctor. They moved her down to the Adderall 5mg and she has no side effects from those. She still doesn't eat much, though, so has to go for regular weight checks. Good luck!!

Kimberley