Did you have a babyshower if you had a preemie, if so was it any different?

S - posted on 12/26/2009 ( 116 moms have responded )

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I am a mom of a micropreemie. This is our first child and i'm wondering about whether or not to still have a baby shower. Obviously we still need a lot but it feels weird no longer being pregnant.

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My daughter was also micro-preemie. My work, my family, and my daughter's dad's family all held separate showers after she was born. Regardless of when a child is born, the parent(s) still need all the help they can get. I was fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who understand that. They actually had the showers sooner than they had originally planned so we would have what we needed to fully care for my daughter.

Amy - posted on 12/26/2009

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Same as Amy Peck, my son was born at 28 weeks, my friends threw a shower for me while he was in Nicu (8 weeks) . We needed the blessing. I would reccommmend staying away from people for a while, or maybe one at a time..... Preemies fight harder!!! Wash hands, be careful.

Amy - posted on 12/26/2009

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@ Sherron - We had the shower while he was in the NICU. We had it when he was 2 1/2 weeks and he didn't come home for another 5 1/2. I'd recommend doing it before your little one comes home, with this being cold and flu season especially, you DO NOT want that many people around your little one.

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116 Comments

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Tina - posted on 03/02/2010

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Our families waited till after we brought our daughter home, before they threw a baby shower. I was so upset that no one was going to plan one, but I found out later that they wanted to wait to see if she was going to survive, before having the shower. It's completely normal to have a shower after the baby arrives...some peolpe prefer to wait till the baby's home.

Sonya - posted on 03/02/2010

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My first baby was a preemie and she had a baby shower when she was almost 5 months old. She was only wearing 0-3 month cloths then but it was a lot of fun and she was old enough to be out in public.

Peggy - posted on 03/01/2010

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Cancelled should've got changed to rescheduled. Now plan for an Amazing First birthday♥

Dena - posted on 03/01/2010

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Hi.. my babyshower was suppose to be on the 29th of March 09, the invites were out, the cakes ordered and the games ready. One thing we didn't prepare for was the arrival of my son by emergency c-sec on the 27th of March 09! 6 wks early he was very very sick and in NICU for 6 weeks. Needless to say the baby shower was cancelled but my close girlfriends came to visit at the hospital.

Lisa - posted on 03/01/2010

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No baby shower. I was hospitalized at 23 weeks and after our daughter was born I really didn't want one

Felicia - posted on 03/01/2010

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I had my son at 24 weeks gestation which was in May. My husbands family along with my family had planned a big babyshower to be done in July. I was due around August 20th. After I had my son, they still decided to do the baby shower as planned. They had a picture of him the day he was born and then one that was taking a few days before the shower that they had blown up at wal-mart. Before the shower started, they explained the pictures then I was able to explain what caused me to have him so early. With having a premie, with all the special formula and items that you will need a babyshower is never to later to have. Also keep in mind nobody plans on having a premie so dont cancel the plans you already had.

Peggy - posted on 02/27/2010

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Dione I'm sure that planning a party is the last this any new mother wants to do but a baby is cause for celebration and If you send out anouncements I bet there will be alot of friends and relatives happy to celebate with you. Be sure to register at stores like Target and Babies R Us and Penneys; if you can find an online store even better. Then place that information at the bottom of your announcement. I bet some of them are still wondering if you had that baby yet and if its okay.

Dionne - posted on 02/27/2010

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My son was born at 26 weeks. Although I had planned to have one and had someone that was supposed to coordinate it, I went into the hospital early when my water broke and never heard of a shower again. On top of hearing several times that you are not supposed to plan your own and I was going to the hospital every day for 3 months. We just struggled to buy everything ourselves - it jerks my heart strings anytime I think about it. So if you have the option to do it go ahead. You will be very happy you did. Make sure to notify everyone that they can not come if they have a cold or do not feel well. Make sure everyone washes their hands and uses hand sanitizer. Better safe than sorry.

Peggy - posted on 02/27/2010

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Sherron,, having a baby shower was one of the best memories I have from a time when I wasn't even sure If my son would ever come home. It was such an afirmation of 'yes he is coming home' and all the cute things; it gave me some much needed strokes and love that you can really use now. don't let not being pregnant bother you I know mothers of full term babies that are waiting til after their baby is born for their showers so that they can get what they need then. Besides being Pregnant is much more uncomfortable.

My best to you and Your little one try and enjoy him.

Lynne - posted on 02/26/2010

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I had a baby shower still. My mom just put up a picture of the baby she had taken in the NICU!! I wasn't there, but my husband went. I joked on my mom that she should have tried to plan it when I could be there....But it was 2 mos before my due date after all! My MIL's shower was 2 weeks after my daughter was born. It wasn't at all awkward and everyone was very supportive. It was actually a relief to be able to get away spend time with my family and friends and talk to people about what was going on. I don't think you should feel awkward. This is still your first baby, and it's not your fault that the baby came early. Everyone will be very supportive I think!

Rachel - posted on 02/26/2010

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I had my daughter at 34 weeks and I had my baby shower 4 days after she was born. She was still in the NICU. I had my baby shower at the time they were doing tests on her.

Rachel - posted on 02/26/2010

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I had my daughter at 34 weeks and I had my baby shower 4 days after she was born. She was still in the NICU. I had my baby shower at the time they were doing tests on her.

Lisa - posted on 02/25/2010

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I had showers before and after my triplets were born. Luckily, my boys were born healthy so I didn't have any problems with having them around other people. It was a nice way to introduce them to family and friends and also get some more things that I still needed. You could change it from being called a baby shower to a welcoming to the world/family party and invite everyone, not just women.

Ashley - posted on 02/25/2010

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my first son was born at 26 1/2 weeks, 1 lb, 7oz. needless to say i hadn't had a baby shower yet, nor had anyone even starting planning one, so we had nothing we needed! he was in the NICU for about 4 months, during which time i had 3 baby showers. one for my side, one for the father's mom's, and one for his dad's. 3 was way too much for me, all i wanted to do was be at the hospital with my baby, but it was really nice of them to throw me a shower anyway. hope you had yours by now and i really hope your baby is healthy, maybe even at home already =)

Amanda - posted on 02/25/2010

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Well, we had a coming home party for my son. the only thing was we asked that if anyone was sick or think that they are getting sick not to come and no children. Everyone was really understanding.

Jen - posted on 02/24/2010

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I totally still had a shower! My boys were born at 28 weeks, and the shower date was already planned for week 32. So I brought pics of my twins to display, made a cool frame with their footprints in the windows, and had lots to talk about because their birth has already happened. It was already planned, so we just kept the date. I thought it was neat that they were already in the world! I couldn't have them home, so might as well celebrate them even if they couldn't be home yet. And a great break from the hospital, which wasn't always uplifting.

Kenya - posted on 02/24/2010

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i did have a baby shower. i had my son on July 27 ( at 25wks) and i had my baby shower Oct 4, 08. My son was still in the NICU at Vanderbilt, so my shower was at the Ronald McDonald House. My mother knew she couldn't get me to leave to go home for the shower, so they brought the shower to me.We had been living there since August and the people at the Ronald McDonald House were nice enough to let her do it there. They surprised me,and all my family came to Nashville. It was really nice.

Tania - posted on 02/24/2010

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My mother had my shower planned ....then I ended up in the hospital because of my health....i didn;t know when my sone would be born but I made my mother keep the shower date even if we had to have it in the hospital. I was able to get a pass for a couple hours and i had my shower. It was strange but I need to be around my friends and family and get my mind off everything for a couple of hours. My son was born 4 days later at 30 weeks.

Rachele - posted on 02/24/2010

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I adopted my little guy... he was a preemie... after I received him at 4 days old, everyone wanted to throw me a shower... they did... he was 5 weeks old and it was the best! So many people came and I got everything i needed and then some.... but more importantly, the support and happiness that everyone shared was overwhelming! Being able to all share in my joy was just wonderful. I say definitely do a shower... If you're worried about the baby being around people don't include the little one. Everyone will still want to celebrate with you and shower you with gifts... regardless of if the little bundle has already arrived early!!!!

Shannon - posted on 02/24/2010

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My Mom and Mother in law still threw my shower, my son was due on 5/12 and was born on 3/8. The shower was scheduled for 4/4. They made is beautiful! Trevor was still in the NICU, and I needed the break from sitting by his bed everyday(although I didn't know it at the time). It was weird not being pregnant, but overall having the shower made it feel more normal...when he was born, we had very little in the house and so after the shower when we set up the crib and washed and put all the little clothes away, it made it feel more like it should have. The other nice thing was that people knew he was a boy so we didn't get a bunch of pink stuff and some people even got preemie stuff for us cause he was so small. Sweetie, you deserve the shower! Remember, it is not about you but about your baby and they deserve everything beautiful and positive life has to offer :) hang in there!

Stacy - posted on 02/24/2010

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Definitely have a shower! Carson was 12 weeks early and was still in the hospital when I had my shower. We placed pictures of him around the room to give people some connection. I think people will be happy to know that there is something they can do to help you!

Carrie - posted on 02/24/2010

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definatly still have one. I did and in a way I think it was more fun because you'll have pictures to show everyone. I wasn't sure how it would be but it went really well. the hard part was leaving her for a couple of hours. just keep in mind that if it ends up being after she is discharged then do NOT brong her with you...too much excitement and too many germs for such a little one...people will understand

Valerie - posted on 02/23/2010

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my daughter was born at 32 weeks & weighed 4 lbs and she was a very healthy baby. she attended her own baby shower which was about a month after she was born we made sure everyone washed and sanitized their hands (NO SICK PEOPLE ALLOWED) it was awkward but tons of fun and we received lots of things for our little one ! we also called it a WELCOME HOME OR BIRTHDAY PARTY.

Lisa - posted on 02/20/2010

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I had my baby shower a week before I had my son. Needless to say I had nothing clothes to fit him because I didn't get any preemie clothes. So after I had my son I had a second small babyshower which came in handy.

Amanda - posted on 02/20/2010

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My son was actually born the day of his shower but alot of people just dropped by afterwards. I think a "meet the baby" party would be a cool alternative. Plus you'd have the advantage of knowing what you needed. There are some things you don't even think of until you actually need them. But you deserve it! A shower is a celebration of life!

Jaclyn - posted on 02/09/2010

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My baby was born at 25 week at 1 pound 5 ounces. I had a baby shower for her. I guess it was different because I wasn't pregnant when I had the baby shower and she still wasn't home yet.

Amy - posted on 02/09/2010

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i HAD MY SON AT 32 WEEKS AND THE SHOWER HAD BEEN PLANNED FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS BUT HE COULDNT ATTEND. I FELT AS THOUGH THE WHOLE THING HAD BEEN RUINED BUT THAT FEELING WAS MORE BECAUSE I HAD TO BURY NY BEST FRIEND THAT DAY, MY GRANDMOTHER. BUT I DECIDED TO BLOW UP A PICTURE IF OUR SON AND SAT IT IN BETWEEN HIS DAD AND I IT HELPED A LITTLE. BUT NO MATTER WHAT ENJOY IT AND REMEMBER THE PEOPLE THERE LOVE YOU AND THE BABY THATS WHY THEY ARE THERE

Karen - posted on 02/09/2010

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A baby is a baby regardless of the size and it should be celebrated! I had a baby born @ 35 weeks and the shower was scheduled to have been 3 days after he was born. I went but I was very tired. Zac was still in the hospital and daddy stayed with him while I went to the party.

Geraldine - posted on 02/07/2010

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I had my baby shower a week after his birth. What about a special party to celebrate his/her birth combined with a shower ? Mine was also 6 weeks early and wasn't expected at all - I had pre-eclampsia.

Heather - posted on 02/06/2010

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I still had a baby shower the only difference was I wasn't pregnant lol. I did it about a week before he came home

Afton - posted on 02/05/2010

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Heck yes, have a baby shower! I had a baby shower for my 27-weeker while she was in the NICU. I had pictures of her displayed around the room and made a slideshow of pictures that I showed my family and friends since they had not seen her yet. It was a wonderful experience - I loved it!

www.preemiebabies101.com

Tamara - posted on 02/04/2010

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My baby shower was scheduled for the weekend my son was born. We waited until he was a month old and had the shower at a place other than our home so that he was not around all of the people.

Alicia - posted on 02/04/2010

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My daughter was 6 weeks early born 34 weeks gest. 5 lbs 4 oz and I was actually gettin ready for her shower but didnt get one. I had her then when I was able to we had a small onewith just family at the hospital and a big one later on once we got her home from the NICU at our house. So to answer your question.... I dont think theres a problem with it, I think you should! and many congrats on your new little one!!

Kristi - posted on 02/04/2010

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My son was born at 29 weeks and was 2lbs 9 oz. He was in the hospital for close to 3 months. Instead of a baby shower we had a "welcome home baby" shower after my son got home from the hospital. It was great!

Michelle - posted on 02/04/2010

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I had preemie twins (born at 24 wks 1lb 8oz and 1lb 7 oz) My family still had a shower for me, but did so while the twins were still in the NICU. It seemed a little strange, but you'll soon realize that with preemies, nothing is normal. You get used to it!

Sara - posted on 02/04/2010

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My son was 6 weeks early. So he wasnt as premature as the rest of the stories ive read so far but i still was given the info that he should not be around other peopl except family and siblings. We went ahead with the baby shower, we kept him in another room while everyone was here. It was a little weird NOT being prego at the baby shower. But we needed to have the baby shower. He was already 3 weeks old when we had the baby shower. Best of luck to you.

Yvonne - posted on 02/02/2010

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Hi There,

I had a 7 weeks preemie and i still had the babyshower after she was born and when she come home

Jamie - posted on 02/02/2010

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Forgot to add that; since Jack was in the hospital and I had already rearranged the ENTIRE apartment, I had time to make a scrapbook of pictures of him...including the birth certificate with his teeny footprints. Our close family had been able to see him in the hospital, but extended family and friends hadn't, so the scrapbook was a nice way for them to get to see him. Walmart is amazing, you can upload pics from your computer to thier Photo Cneter, and go pick them up!! Was a very handy tool.

Kelly - posted on 02/02/2010

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I too had a shower- my daughter Amelia was born at 24 weeks gestation- the week prior to her birth i was in the hospital on bedrest- at that point the shower was already planned. Because of me on bedrest we planned on sending daddy to sit in the chair (almost kind of wished that had happened, would have been a hoot with the bow hat and everything lol). I was admitted on 10/12/08, had Amelia on 10/21/08, then had my shower on 11/15/08. I took a book of pictures to pass around, and I got tons of stuff- love my family & friends! Oh, and Amelia finally came home to us 2/19/09 (2 weeks after her due date).

Jamie - posted on 02/01/2010

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My son was born 4 months early. so needless to say we had just started to discuss shower plans, lol. I ended up having 2 showers, one for my husband's job (family company, and I used to work there), as well as my family shower. Both my showers were held after the baby was born, but before he came home from the hospital. I was on bedrest before he was born, so I didn't get to nest ahead of time, but boy did I make up for it. I had the showers and the entire house cleaned and organized before he came home!

Amber - posted on 02/01/2010

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I am 30 weeks and been in the hospital for 4 weeks due to my water breaking at 26 weeks. This is my first baby and I have nothing. I am having a shower March 7th and have been planning it while I have been in here. If I do not go into labor by myself by 34 weeks(Feb. 26th, my dad's birthday!) they will induce. So I will be out by then so I will be able to go to my shower. But you should definitely have a baby shower so you can get every thing you need. Good luck!

Janet - posted on 01/31/2010

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My son was born at 33 wks weighing 4lbs 5oz, my shower was 2 days after he came home. I did not even bring him with me because it was the middle of the flu season. I had spent 10 days too long convincing him what he had to do to come home to take him back. I feel anyone who truly cares would understand if the baby does not attend the shower, but every mother deserves to have a shower.

Lindsay - posted on 01/26/2010

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My son was born at 27wks weighing only 1lb 13oz, we had a baby shower 2 wks before my son came home and yeas if was weird bc we were having the shower with out the baby there and i wasnt pregnant anymore! We were going to wait to have it until our son came home but we didnt want all those ppl around him.

Lakeeta - posted on 01/23/2010

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sure. My baby girl was due on October 17 but came July 28...12 weeks early..my baby shower was scheduled for Sept 13. Well Ka'Bren was still in the hospital at that time..she came home on her original due date and we had her shower 3 weeks later. It might seem a little weird..but its very normal...While my daughter was in the hospital..I made friends with some of the other mothers...and they said they were all having their showers as planned...some before their babies come home and some after. So you go ahead girl and have that shower.

Kathryn - posted on 01/22/2010

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My son was born 6 months ago, in the NICU for 15 weeks, and my work is just now throwing me a shower, which is really incredibly weird. I don't know why they waited so long to do it. I was back at work while my son was in the NICU (I teach at a university) and then took some time off when he came home in November. I need nothing ... as you know, with a kid in the NICU during RSV season, you get everything you need prior to his homecoming so that you have no need to rush out to the store. But I did put some 9 and 12 months needs on the shower list, just to have something. I expect most folks will give clothes, but I do hope instead they decide to get me the things I asked for (we have enough clothes). My recommendation - have a shower, just have it a lot earlier than I will be doing. :)

Elizabeth - posted on 01/13/2010

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I had my shower 2 weeks before my daughter was born at 30 weeks, because I had a feeling she would be premature, I just planned my shower early, and thank god I did, it worked out better having it earlier!

Rebecca - posted on 01/13/2010

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I had given out half my baby shower invites when my daughter was born a month before my shower at 31 weeks. I didnt end up having it cause I wasnt emotionally and mentally in a good place at the time, but I dont think you should cancel yours because you feel weird that you are no longer pregnant! You deserve that party and all those presents after all you have been through. Bring photos of your baby to show everyone, im sure all your friends would love to spoil you and your new baby!

Shirley - posted on 01/12/2010

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yes, I had a baby shower...I had triplets @ 34wks with a scheduled c-section. So, I knew when I was going to have them. 5lbs 1oz, 5lbs 13oz and 4lbs 9oz, (2boys 1girl)They are almost 4yrs old now...time flies!

Liz - posted on 01/12/2010

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My twins were born six weeks early, on the morning of the baby shower. My baby shower went on without us there.

Andree - posted on 01/12/2010

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My son was born at 29 weeks and stayed in the hospital for 82 days! One of the hardest things (besides having my son in the NICU) was mourning the loss of my ideal pregnancy! I had two baby showers about a 6 weeks after my son was born and it was difficult. I brought framed pics of my son and set them out for everyone to see. Just remember it's only a couple of hours, and you do get many things that you will need for your little angel! Good luck with what ever you decide, but I say it's worth having the shower!

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