My Preemie Baby

Emily - posted on 05/10/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My little munchkin was born 13 weeks early and he weighed 2lbs3oz and was 13.4 inches long. I went into the emergency room for cramps and light bleeding but as soon as i got to the emergency room the bleeding got so much worse. They checked everything out and they said my placenta had separated, his amniotic sac was coming out of my uterus, and the last thing that made them deliver me by emergency c-section, was that his heart-rate was dropping. They told me after i had woken up from the anesthesia if he hadn't been delivered when he was the both of us wouldn't be here. They had to do the incision vertically, I'm not sure of the reason. He was born at 6:35pm, I got to see him the day after around 3pm. He was the smallest most precious life i had ever seen, but at the same time I felt like I had failed him because for some reason my body couldn't go full term. Which I'm sure there could have been several different reasons. I am 16 years old, I didn't get the greatest prenatal doctor care they turned me away from appointments several times because i didnt have insurance and they never checked me for any pregnancy problems like toxcemia or preeclampsia, which i had told them the few mabey 2 times i actually saw them that my blood pressure had been way higher than normal and I felt like every joint in my body had bloated. 10 days before Silas was born I had had an appointment to find out I was having a boy and they said everything looked fine. My son Silas spent 71 days in the NICU and had a grade 4 brain bleed on the right side of his brain and a grade 1 on the left. His PDA was also larger than normal so that was closed by him given ibuprofen. He only ever needed oxygen flow through a SiPap machine and then soon a nasal cannula. He is now home and has been home for a little over a month. We're both doing great and hes almost 8 pounds. He never once got sick while he was in the NICU but he did need blood transfusions several times. He got breast milk until the doctors found out he was asperating during his feeds, so they switched him to formula with rice cereal, without even checking to see if they could thicken the breast milk. I remember telling them that I wanted him fed breast milk, but I guess some things I just don't have a choice over. I guess I just wanted to share my experience as a new mom, a teenage mom, and a mom of a preemie. So far im loveing it immensely though i am doing it for the most part on my own. Im lucky i have the support i have from my mom shes letting me stay in an apartment that's a part of our family's restaurant. :) Can anyone tell me though, how can things change so quickly in a matter of days? How come doctors turn you away at appointments during your pregnancy when you don't have insurance?(Which, might I add i did have insurance the whole time i was pregnant and it was on file. They just never called to check, which I'm sure couldn't have taken more than a few minutes, because I was in the process of getting my insurance changed though I did have a temporary card.) I'm probably a little peeved that a lot of the things i wanted to do for my baby didnt go the way i planned..Has anyone had an experience similar? Or does anyone have a previous 27 weeker that's hit major milestones im just curious when i might expect my preemie to do things I'd usually see a baby do.

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Kim - posted on 05/13/2012

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Emily, You are already doing amazing and wonderful things for your baby! You sound so wise for your young 16 years by recognizing and identifying what you want for your baby. I imagine that there is some prejuidice against you for being young and dr's or nurses assuming they know better than you. If you educate yourself and ask questions, your gut is to be trusted as I believe you are the greatest advocate for your baby. It's so hard to judge preemie developmental milestones. My baby was 2 lbs 5 oz and only 13 inches long. He is currently 3 1/2 months old. The physical therapist keeps telling me what he should be doing based on his corrected age. He is not meeting those milestones, but he also wasn't a "normal" 34 weeker either since he was extremely growth restricted. So who's to say, but keep being his advocate. If you are worried that he isn't progressing as you think, ask for support. Almost every state has free resources to preemie babies for growth and development that the NICU should have set you up with.. If not, call your local March of Dimes and ask for the local resources in your area. Best of luck to you!

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Ginger - posted on 05/25/2012

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I remember being turned away for appointments and i had insurance, but no one would take it. I had placental seperation at one point. I finaly found a doctor who would see me. My Son was still early. I know how it feels. No one believed he was comming. It was awful. I felt soo alone in the situation. I hope that you don't feel so alone. That formula with rice starch is a life saver. I do think a doctor should respect you to explain benifits and consequences of the options at hand. Some doctos think they are smart and we are dumb too dumb to know or understand. Being a Mom and a Mom of a preemie makes you learn things you may have thought you would never have to learn. Like how many breaths per minute in relation to age. How many seconds between breaths in too many. bla blah blah!!!! AHAHAH!!! I can say that I too kinda understand.
It isn't your fault this happened. Sometimes it just does. Sometime you can do everything in your power and hard things just happen.
Go find him a pediatrician with expertise in handling preemies and one who will answer your questions. There isn't anyway you will know what to do unless they answer your questions, give you an emergancy plan and signs to watch out for.
As far as what to expect. The best thing to do is just love your boy for where he is now. REad what to expect the first year. But go by his adjusted age at first. If he may be a little behind that is ok. Just praise him for every little thing he does and encourage him to practice on the next step developments. Just don't get all piano teacher with a ruler on him. As long as he is having fun he will continue to improve and make his milestones. Eventually most preemies grow out of most if not all signs of being a preemie and catch up.
I strongly suggest therapy. If I had more time I wish I could do therapy. But who has time for therapy when they are actually caring for a tiny baby. I admit to taking some anti-depressants after my son was born. Not because he depressed me, but because I was tired and heartbroken and it helped me.
You may be young, but you are not dumb! Just love your baby and you will do fine. One day it won't seem so hard. In the future if you or your baby are experiencing scary signs or symptoms don't be afraid to go to the hospital if you have too. I had to go on Medicaid for a while. I am proud that after 3 years my boy is doing fantastic and I am finally getting off medicaid. So you just take it one thing at a time. When that thing is dealt with move to the next. I am tired now, so i apologize if my words don't make to much sense. If you ever want to talk or need some help finding resources in your area I will be happy to be hear.

Dorrie - posted on 05/22/2012

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I had a 27weeker. And he is now 8months old and weighs 15lbs 8oz. So far we have rolled overand trys to sit up with help. So your milesstones will be later then most.

Emily - posted on 05/22/2012

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I am actually getting help from early interventions and wic from my state. I've only seen them once since he came home, but he goes in for his first evaluation this week. Thank you for your reply :)

Lorna - posted on 05/16/2012

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congrats hun, hard aint it. my lil girl was 12wks early an wieghed 2lb 2oz! her bro was prem at 8wks early too. both of them had their waters go early. noah came 48hrs after my waters broke an coz i look so young 4 my age no 1 believed me i was in labour on the ward untill i was screaming at them that i was pushing an the midwife had the audasity 2 roll her eyes an say 2well atleast give me a chance 2 page the neo natal team! if they had bothered 2 read my file, he was my second child lol. they thought there was no reason 4 his early arrival but i found out in a horrible way this yr that they were wrong. anyway seren my daughter started 2 come the same way, waters went early and i knew in my gut she would be here in 48hrs like noah. but then i got sick so they pumped my full of antibiotics an took her out by c-section 2 b on the safe side. they didnt find out what was causing this problem with me at this point. she was lucky tho an had no probs bar a blood transfusion when we moved hospitals 2 b nearer our home. the oxygen level they gave her in her c-pap only went above 21% a handfull of times an never above 40%. she was in hosp 4 8wks. shes 21 mnt now an slow 2 start talking with only 10 words so far an not gud pronouncement of those. she didnt start walking untill 6wks ago but is nearly running already. she is just under 9kg an is v small but shes in preportion as im only 4"11(and a 1/2 lol) so she aint never gunna be a tall girl so im not too concerned. the only problem she does have, but not sure if its a premie thing or a 'she eats way too much" thing but she has had gradually worsening constapation where she needs 2 meds a day 1 of them 3-4 times a day just so she dont get a worse prolapse than she already has. it started when she was 6-8mnts. when seren was 6mnts old i left my abusive hubby (he wasnt the problem with me going into labour early) and 6days later found out we were expecting, 9 days later i had a large bleed an assumed i was losing the bby. had scan the nxt day an it was twins so had 2 take it easy. it was high risk preg coz of both the previous prem births an of course coz they were twins. my oby said he thought they woud arrive between 24-28wks if i was lucky. i wasnt, they came at 20wks+5, waters just decided 2 break again. it was horrible and ended badly so i'll spare u most the details, but 24hrs after the twins waters had broke i got v sick v fast an they had 2 induce me. after all the horribleness a dr came 2 see me an asked me if i understoo why what had happend, had happend, i asked him why. they had found that i had a v v bad strep b infection in me (not like when u have it an it can pass 2 the bby) an it had been attacking me, they dont know how long i had been hurting me but when the waters broke it full on attacked me and i ended up with sepsis and nearly died, not that i was that aware of it at the time mind u, was a bit preoccupied with my twins arrival an wishing an praying that they wud stay put 4 another 3wks. any way all my premie bbys were born early due 2 the same reason. strep b. my doc also thinks its the reason i had so many misscariges whilst trying 4 my kidz (7 lost b4 the twins between @ 6-9wks) im on the waiting list 2 b steralised now tho, cant face ever being pregnant again, too hard. an i have 3 wonderful kidz so im all gud, ish. it'll be a yr on the 20th of june. just remember, what ever mile stones hes not meeting, its ok. it cud have been worse. each bby given 2 us is so special and so precious.

are u worried about the damage left by the bleeds? it was a huge concern 4 all the mums in the hosps we were in with the kidz an i dont envy u having 2 factor in such a posibilaty, but remember hes here hun, an i bet that 2 u, he'll be the most fab kid in the world, regardless of any possible health probs. u keep going the way u r hun, by the sounds of it ur doing an amazing job! an like the other lady said, so wise 4 1 so young. oh an dont let any1 make u feel bad 4 being a young mum, most of the best mums i know had their kidz b4 they were 18 good luck 2 u hun :)

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