Holding preemie's back a year for school

Cheryl - posted on 12/10/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Just wondering if other parents have decided to keep there preemie's back a year and put them in school when they should have gone if they were born on your due date. Anabelle was born at 29 weeks in november and she should have been born in february. We are thinking of holding her back a year and putting her in when she should been born. Where we live the go full day every day starting at 4. Please let me know how others have handled it

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Jennifer - posted on 12/21/2010

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I am a former kinder teacher and have always advicated for children with birthdates between May and the Sept 1 cut off to wait a year, especially boys! Well my 29wk boy was born in May and should of been born in August! Yes, we are waiting a year!!! He currently attends preschool at a spanish immersion school and we do plan on him doing the private kinder program there next year, but only with the expectation of him having one more year of spanish immersion, the following year we will have him "do" kindergarten.
Here is my spiel. You need to look at ALL areas of your child's development; social/emotional/physical/academic. If she lags behind in any one of these areas she is going to struggle. She may be able to make it through, but she is going to struggle. I've never been able to find a "lable" for the "older" students but there IS a VAST differance between them and the younger ones (the majorty are that middle ground). I do have the best experiance with it though. I once had a little girl who was an August birthday. She spent an entire 9wks in my class. She was quiet and reserved, but held her own and was doing well academically. Evidently at home though she was a MESS! She cried every day about having to go to school, she threw tantrums at night, she behaved absolutely "young" at home. Her Mom came to me and said taht they'd decided to pull her and send her back to preK. I agreed with her decision, but couldn't help her support it because in the classroom she behaved fine and was doing well academically. Once they pulled her her behavior setlled down and she was fine. The next year she now at the age of 6, instead of just turned 5, she was in my classroom and she was a TOTALLY different child. She was outspoken and confident. She was a leader. And she was very strong academically! She has become my posterchild for my soapbox of wait a year!
I know a lot of areas have "transitional" programs for young 5yr olds and this group of children with the birthdate problem. I find these programs to be a wonderful alternative. It is sort of what we are doing with our son by having him remain is a program he already knows well (he's been there two days a week since he was two) and not forcing unrealistic expectations on him. He's a smart, smart boy and amazes me with what he knows academically. His weakness is his social/emotional area, we have just overcome his seperation anxiety this year, he finally at 4yrs old doesn't cry all day every day we leave him! Sweet boy!
I am learning that with preemies, even though they may be considered "caught up" new "delays" pop up here and there when you least expect it. It's just the nature of the preemie game. So always keep in mind your child's developmental age, even if they are "caught up".

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Kylee - posted on 12/22/2010

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Hi, I got told put my Daughter Jameelee who was born at 25 weeks Gestation hold her off, But I decided to put her in Day care,Kindergarten this year it has done her good, she hasn't quite at all the skills as her peers but she is heading up. She is 5 Next year when they start Pre-primary in here in Western Australia and they will have some teacher aid, if they have been known to have Global Developmental Delay was my daughter has it, Plus she needs to wear glasses.

Candace - posted on 12/11/2010

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If you think she's not ready yet then maybe you should wait a year but if she's ready for school then go ahead and let her go. I see nothing wrong with holding her back a year since she wouldn't have been going anyway if she was born around her due date. If you do decide to hold her back just work with her at her home just to make sure that she's ready when you do decide to send her to school.

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