LIsa - posted on 08/22/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )
I have a 4 1/2 year old girl who I really believe have some strong characteristics of this disorder. I began researching this when she was 3, closer to 4 actually when the state finally diagnosed her as having a severe speech delay. At the age of 3 1/2 she was tested in the 3 percentile for speech. A 97 percent delay. After advocating and waiting, I finally got her in our Early Special Ed for 2 days a week. She attended that 2 half days a week last year, her speech has improved tremendously but I still see other issues. I have asked professionals over and over there has got to be an underlying issue that has cause such a delay since there were vowels and such she never learned back in infancy. Also, it used to take us 2 hours just to prepare her for the fact that we will be getting dressed and leaving an hour after that! Special Ed has helped that alot, but there are still things, like wanting all the lights on in the house, won't flush the toliet due to the noise, washing her hair is just a nightmare!! no water near the eyes or on the face, echoing what I say more to herself, not mocking (well not all the time :) ), eats the same foods, won't go outside if the air smells, like if there is dew out or after it rains. She just started preschool 4 days a week and has had a meltdown, like throwing her full toybox across the room, grabbing her hard plastic golf club and hitting it so hard on her door ( over and over) it made a dent, crying at the drop of a hat ect, everyday this week but thursday, this is all responsive to her having to go to school 4 days a week. She does fine at school though which is good. I know she's only 4 1/2 but that just seems extreme way to acclamate to a school schedule. She jumps on my all the time (painfully that is), she has had a history of just spinning in circles and arm flapping but that hasn't happened in awhile.
I know there are more but I can't remeber. I have to add that her dad has ADHD/Asbergers (mild), I have ADHD, her cousin has severe Autism and her uncle on my side asbergers. So there is a very clear family gene. I don't know how to get tested, when I talk to her school they pretty much say that since they haven't seen any problems (this was when she was going only 2 days a week) then it's my parenting. When I talk to family I am over reacting, it's just her age, blah blah blah...I don't see anything severe but I am afraid it could be something that can effect her educationaly and personally as she developes. She is exteremly bright and that it seems will be the extra shove right in between the cracks and she will not get the help she needs.
Now that she is in school 4 days a week and we need to revamp her IEP I wonder if I should bring these issues up again since she has different teachers and a nicer principal. Last year her principal and IEP team accused me of wanting something for free and threatened to take the little time she did have away since I asked for more so I am leary of asking for more help but at the same time it's my daughter's right to have the best education she deserves and I don't want my fear of being bullied jeopardize that.
I love her so much and I know I get too frustrated with her. I do feel like I am failing as a parent. That makes me feel like a failure as a human. Shes my greatest thing God has given me and I feel like I am screwing this wonderful gift up.