Momtoone - posted on 08/31/2011 ( 24 moms have responded )
Current drama started beginning of summer with her conduct online being inappropriate, chasing boys, talking/texting with them all night, another friend of hers (girl) stating they were married and calling each other wifey. So I blocked her off Facebook and took her phone away and explained what is appropriate conduct and what is not (she told her friends she hated me). A month later I gave her the phone back and allowed her internet access again. She was playing immortal nights until I found her cybering on there with boys and men of all ages. Blocked her from that and all other non-approved websites. All was peachy keen until yesterday when the school called with a not-so-clean note signed by her. She claimed innocence, that she didn't write the note, didn't know who did, etc... Handwriting has 2 styles and 1 style is very much like hers...only thing was spelling, grammar, punctuation was perfect and that's so not my daughter. Daughter has been back in school for 6 days and has a new boy blowing up her phone... I took her phone away and talked to her about unladylike behavior again and asked who was teaching her those words, she named a friend (who was also flirting up older men). I told her last night I was going to the school to see the note and how it was written. This morning, out of the blue, she clams that my husband of nearly 11 years has been 'trying' to touch her breasts when I'm not at home. So I asked her to tell me everything and she gave me some vague details (nothing specific); I told her to finish getting ready for school and I would handle it. Since then I have asked her the when, where, how questions and get nothing specific. Generalities. First she stated it happened over the summer when I was working 2 days a week when my husband would come home for lunch and 'things' would happened when she was blowing her hair. First she said it happened in her room, then changed the story to stating it happened in my room. Husband is only home for 30 minutes at lunch and texts me when he's there. Then she claimed it happened when we were in one city but again, no details, lots of ummms and I don't remember. Then she said it didn't happened in another house and then changed the story again. The only thing consistent is how the story keeps growing and includes time-frames when I was always home (I haven't worked full time since she was 2). Every question she answers her eyes dart in every direction.
Please note...I was sexually abused as a child in the 3rd and 4th grade. I remember every detail. Its caused me to be a very watchful mother of everyone that comes in contact with my daughter. I looked up all the symptoms of child abuse and not one applies to my daughter. I avoided my abuser, my daughter constantly initiates group hugs, freely comes out and sits on my husband's lap and compares her hand to his to see if hers has grown, wants him to adopt her, makes sure to hug and kiss him good night, gets mad when he doesn't say goodbye in the morning when he goes to work, etc etc etc.
I'm incredibly confused... Could she be lying to avoid having to deal with the letter found at school? Would a teen really go that far? Some of her claims aren't even physically possible! I'm keeping her home from school tomorrow to try and get her in with the doctor but I can't help feel like she's lying. Help please!