14 year old engaged?

Heather - posted on 07/29/2010

She will be engaged 10 more times before the actual thing. Ever bf my daughter had they were engaged and thought they were gonna be together forever. She will grow so much the next couple of yrs and I wouldnt worry too much. Keep a open relationship and let her know she can always come to you.

Megan - posted on 07/29/2010

My dad would have killed him but that's not the answer.
If you're lucky, he will go off to college and start acting like normal college guys do, meet someone with more experience and dump your daughter. Sure she'll be sad and you'll feel bad for her but as you try to cheer her up your inner voice will be dancing with joy. No one wants their kids to hurt but I can't imagine you want this relationship to continue.

Christie - posted on 07/28/2010

I don't know what the laws are where you live Kim but, maybe you could talk to this young mans parents and see what they think about this and maybe to your local police department without giving any names not to get anyone into trouble. Where did a 17 year old come up with the money to buy a ring worth over a thousand dollars? Dad may be against it but I find that the more you are gainst something the more a teen may retaliate or become rebelious. Good Luck and prayers headed your way. Thats a touchy subject!

Keri - posted on 07/27/2010

there are no laws about getting engaged but a lot of states have age requirements for when they actually get married. You would more than likely have to sign off on a paper saying it was ok for them to get married.

I wouldn't worry too much though if he is going off to college and she is still in highschool. I am sure that the long distance thing for such youngsters will do it's own thing for them. I am sure she will end up getting in terested in someone else or he for that matter. When they start swimming in different circles of fish they may realize that they don't want to get married. Just google to see how old she needs to be to get married for your state and stick to it. Tell them you have no problem if they can wait until she is old enough to do it without you having to sign any papers. If they can and they make it then it sounds like you wouldn't have any problems with it.

Gena - posted on 07/24/2010

Wow--14 years old and wanting to get engaged? Sorry but that made me chuckle..She's is just a child. He is off to college & wants to spend $1000 on a ring? Seems to me he would be needing that kind of $ for college expenses. If it were me & thank God it is not, there is no way I would allow my daughter to be engaged at 14. Not even a promise ring. He doesn't sound like he has his head on too straight if he is doing something this foolish. He needs to focus on college, while she focuses on High School. If they do stay in touch then they need to wait until she graduates High School and see what happens. Situation really strange..glad I'm not in your shoes..I suggest lots of prayers & rational decisions be made in these circumstances. She is WAY TOO YOUNG to be engaged or promised..she has a long life ahead of her. Teenagers--gotta love them!!

Marlana - posted on 07/23/2010

WOW! what a topic. And there have been some VERY adamant opinions. I've been married for 20 years. And I love my husband. But before I met him I was engaged to someone else. The someone else still has a place in my heart. (Its just not as big as my husband's!!) We started dating in the 9th grade when I was 14. Slight difference, he was the same age. We dated for 4 years. It was a wonderful experience and I have to tell you that if my dad wasn't in the military and we hadn't moved away we would be married now. And for all you nay-sayers, please don't tell me that if we wanted it bad enough or loved enough we would have made it work. We talked about it and decided to do the "mature" thing and let each other enjoy our senior years away from each other. The point is though, that at 14 I was more mature (intelligent and emotion wise) than most of the girls who were 16 or 17 that I knew. Of course, you know your daughter better than anyone. I think that if two people care that deeply for one another, and respect one another enough to not "date" and respect your wishes on those rules, maybe there is something there. I think that probably a promise ring would be more appropriate, but if the ring has already been bought then so be it. Let her accept it. Let her wear it even. But with the agreement that it be regarded not as an engagement ring, but as a pre-engagement ring. And yes there are such things. What the ring is called and what it stands for are so much more important than what it costs. I still have my promise ring from my first relationship. But not the engagement ring. The engagement ring bothered my husband. But the truth is, the promise ring from my first relationship and from my husband mean so much more to me. That ring stands for a promise to the future. To be friend, to be there for me, to love me. Its not a sexual promise or a promise of marriage. Both men are still my friends. Both still love me and will forever. Its just that I guess we both outgrew the first relationship and moved on. He is happily married and has two children now. But there's a small part of us that will always love each other, even if its no more than as a good friend and a fond memory. I think that as your daughter and her friend age and mature, they may come to realize this and your work will be done for you.

Zatonda - posted on 07/23/2010

UGH, are you serious? I mean your concern is about some law about a cheap ring. I'm going to bed now, and will say I agree with her father. My daughter is 14 today and she still does kids things,allow her to be child, if he is good as you say, then as a bird he'll fly back to her when he done with his education and she had a few more years to grow, sure they can get married , but to be fair to her let her grow.

Melissa - posted on 07/21/2010

First off, if he GIVES her a ring it is just that, a gift the only one responsible for the ring is her. She doesn't have to give it back. The thing that I don't get is why she would want to be engaged at the young age of 14. My husbands ex was young like that, hense the key word EX. She was too young to know what she wanted. Kids act on the moment, not on the long run. He will go to college, she will go to High School and something new will come along. My son is 13 and looks at girls but just "doens't want to be tied down" Meaning he wants to have fun with his friends. I am proud of him for that. He will eventually get a serious girlfriend, but I have taught him there is more to life and alot of things to experience, so stay your age and have fun with it.

Cara - posted on 07/19/2010

We are in a similar situation. Our daughter is almost 14, and her boyfriend just turned 18. They have been together for almost 7 months. He hints that he intends to marry her. I say they are not dating, as they are not allowed to be alone, ever, and certainly no 'dates', except maybe out with the family.
At this age their feelings are very real. I have never believed that there was some magic, arbitrary age for anything. But belittling their feelings is a great way to inspire rebellion.
I think its great that you keep them well chaperoned, as in my opinion, letting them grow up, in secure boundaries, is the height of being a great mom. I made sure this boy was well informed of the boundaries, and I never apologize for it. I told him to never even think of doing something with my daughter that he wouldn't do in front of me. (I do allow a little kissing, modest hugs, and holding hands. Thats all.)
I made him understand that he had to be committed to letting her remain very innocent, and not rush her growing up. She has made that point clear herself. It sounds like your dd's bf understands that too. As long as he is really committed to letting her 'grow up' slowly, then he probably is a really nice guy.
My daughter and I discussed engagement, just in case it comes up. She said that NO one would ever take it seriously because of her age, so it would just be silly. And she understands that, due to her age, no matter how awesome he is, it just might not last.
A promise ring seems more realistic to me.
The problem that I see is that Dad is against it. You need to explain to the boy that he needs to ask the question to Dad. You probably need to talk to Dad privately and get in agreement with what is allowed. Then have boy talk to him.
As far as laws, I thought a gift was a gift and belonged to the one who received it. Although, one does return the ring if the engagement is off.
Sounds like the boy just wants to make sure she understands his feelings before he goes.
There are two extremes on this subject - anything goes, and no, no, no not till 'magic age'...
I think it is great if a really nice (in our situation, one who believes like we do) wants to hang around as 'part of the family', and get to know our daughter, and be 'committed'.
As she puts it : I get to grow up knowing him for a really long time. Then if we ever do get married, I will have known him for like 7 years, and really know him.

Kristi - posted on 07/16/2010

I was engaged at 16, married at 17. It was way to young then, so 14 is just too young for that serious of commitment. While is still get along with my now ex husband, we both had so much growing up to do that we became two different people than we fell in love with. I say set them down and let them know this is too soon. They can keep in touch, write letters, whatnot,but they need to grow up and see where life leads them.

Peggie - posted on 07/16/2010

Sit down with them both and talk to them about it. Explain that she is too young and needs to date other young men when she is old enough. If they don't want to do that tell him to keep the ring or take it back and get her a promise ring. He should not be spending that kind of money on an engagement ring because she is too young. You should tell him if they are still together when she is 17 then they can get engaged. They might be upset with you but its for their own good. Good luck.

Rita - posted on 07/15/2010

Wow! I started young I was 18 and married at 19. I know that your daughter is going to be faithful and that she will miss out on so much. I think that you should have get her involved in more social outings with groups of friends in church or sports! She is about to have sex know this to be a fact and you need to prepare yourself for all of these things. The ring is hers to keep once it is given to her by law it is a gift and she in the owner now. I know that you are able to be married in Indiana or Ohio at 16 without parental permission. You are her mom and a prayer journal is needed. You find the most beautiful diary you can with a lock and key for her personal thoughts and you give her only one key you keep the other. Tell her nothing and you are able to keep up with everything! This is invading there privacy but saving her future is more important!

Julie - posted on 07/14/2010

i agree that he will go off to college and while there will grow up a bit and realise that not only is your daughter too young but that he is as well. he will meet new friends and have a blast while a way and probably meet another girl. dont think any worse of him he will be the same person just a bit more amture in his thinking. he will be doing what all teenagers his age should be doing and thats having fun. while he's a way make sure your daughter still has fun and goes out with friends as usual and when that fateful day comes when she she gets the dear jane letter or call just make sure you hug her and let her know she will be ok. dont belittle her feelings or dismaiss them as the crush we all know it is because to her it feels like the real deal. just make sure you support her and let her know you love her. all we have to do with any situation our kids are goinf through is remember what you were like at that age and draw on those feelings and the way your mum reacted. if you think her reaction wasnt right then adjust yours. good luck and i hope she isnt too heartbroken. bless her first love i remember that aww !!!! hugs to you all

Michele - posted on 07/11/2010

It's not about the cost of the ring or whether or not they have good grades. They are both too young. A 14 year old should not have the pressure of a committed relationship on that level while she is in jr. high or high school. She is still a baby, regardless to how bright she is. My son is 14 and has been taking SAT exams since 6th grade. He's a gifted artist and very intelligent. However, he is no where near ready for such a serious relationship. As for your husband, this is his baby. No man wants to see his daughter with someone until they are in a position to take care of them as well as he has or event better. I can only speak out of my personal experiences. I have a 17 year old daughter who is very mature and when we discussed her living in a dorm this fall, she said she's not ready.
Often times as women we are caught up in the idea of being in love or having someone in our lives more than we are with becoming whole first. It's rare for a child to know exactly what they want at this age, but it's not impossible. Ask yourself the hard questions ans please include Dad. If he loves her that much, he will wait. Let him go off to school and graduate, secure a job and housing and then return for her. She will be 18, legal, can sign for herself and you would have completed your God given responsibility in raising her. She will hurt for a minute, just be there to dry the tears. They don't always know what's best. Love ya!

Keep us posted.

Vonkisha - posted on 07/10/2010

U HAVE TO GIVE PERMISSION FOR THEM TO MARRY ...SO SAY NO UNTIL SHE IS 18... WAT IT OUT ....HE'S GOING TO COLLEGE.... TIME WILL TELL ... YES YOUR RESPONSIBLE FOR THE RING SHE IS 14... THINK HARD...

Alexandra - posted on 07/10/2010

kimberly i have a 10 year old good girl but she told me this never fall in love stand in love soo mary 1000 haha she should not even have a ring on her finger she can get a band or a barclet that say stay to gather that way you or your husband dont have to be bullies hoped it helped

Nancy - posted on 07/10/2010

I have a 14 year old and I think that is way to young to even think of marriage. If it was me I would tell my daughter and this boy that they have the rest of their lives to think about marriage. Wait until they are both 18 or over and if they still feel the same way then you know it is ment to be. If it is true love it will wait = )

Amy - posted on 07/10/2010

If they are never alone and he is going away to college soon then you really dont have anything to worry about. Teenagers lead their life by the heart and by what their friends think is cool. If mom and dad dont approve, they usually don't care. They simply say "parents just don't understan, we're in love". I would sit and talk with them and tell them look you're both too young to be engaged, but not to young to be committed to eachother. Get her a commiment ring if it would make you happy, but as far as engagement save that til your both legally adults. tell them how much you love her and like him, but an engagement is not appropriate and could give others the wrong idea , others that are not as understanding as we are, others that could possibly cause trouble for the young man. If you expain it in a way that makes them understand your issue with it and by you comprimising with the commitment ring then maybe they'll lay off the engagement stuff. And they wont start the Romeo and Juliet "Everyones against us" Syndrome.

In all likely hood, after a while at college they will grow apart. Just be prepared for your daughter and have a big box of kleenex, we just went through the first love break up and it is heartbreaking.

Cheryl - posted on 07/10/2010

Wow that is tough. My daugher was given a engagement ring by a boy when she was 17, her father and I both knew it was not going to last and let it run its course. They have both moved on. She is now 21 and in the airforce. He is married to someone else with a child. The point is maybe with the age difference they will grow apart on their own. If they are never alone so that sex is not an issue. I dont know the laws on that but i do belive under the age of 18 requires a parent signature to get married.

Yvonda - posted on 07/10/2010

I think we all think we find our soul mate at a very young age,(I sure did, but I also got pregnant at 15) I'm sure your daughter thinks she's in love with this young man, and he her, but in reality I dont think it's possible for a children her age to know the concept of love, I would tell them that a promise ring is okay, but to hold off on the engagement until she is of age. I can see why her father is against it, my husband would want to kill someone over our daughter. But if your daughter is mature enough to want this kind of relationship, then she should be mature enough to understand that this kind of commitment is for adults. I have to say that I admire the fact that you won't allow them to be alone, because although I love my son with all my heart, I know now that at 15 I was way too young to have him, and I now that I was in no way ready for that type of relationship, I do wish you and you family all the best, God bless you!

Mitzi - posted on 07/09/2010

Wow I don't care how old the young man is.14 year old should not be engaged I don't blame your husband at all for not going along with this. Why are you allowing this to happen? Pray and get lots of people input. Mom you might just want to rethink this out again.

Sherri - posted on 07/09/2010

I have a (then 15-16 y.o.)son who was 'dating' a girl who was only 13-14 I kept the lines of communication open and let him talk to me about his problems with her and told him my concerns about him dating someone that young. she kept cheating on him they would break up and she would get tired of the other guy then crook her finger my son went through this with her like 3-4 times before he realized she was not good for him and he broke it off with her. He now has a new girlfriend and she seems better for him than the little drama queen he had before. so yes 13-14 is too young for any serious relationship in my opinion. my daughter didn't start dating until 16 and only in group settings. she relished the fact that she was/is daddys little girl(19 yo now).Good luck and God Bless.

Tammy - posted on 07/09/2010

Absolutely she should not be dating a boy about to go to college. Is something wrong with this young man that he can not find a girl on his age level to have a relationship with? He may very well be a wonderful young man, but something is wrong if he has his eyes on a girl who is likely still in middle school. Be honest and open with your daughter. And as for the Dad- good for him for standing his ground! But dont fool yourself that if they only see each other at school or church or supervised activities, things still can happen. Make sure your daughter knows who she is and is confident in herself not to make decisions she will later regret.

Tina - posted on 07/09/2010

First off I have a 14 yo daughter and would absolutely go crazy if some 17 yo boy tried to even come around my child!! I try to keep my daughter busy with family, AP classes in school, FFA, and volunteer work. I understand that they will always find a way to communicate but Im not going to give my child permission. As for the ring, I would return it immediately!!! This boy will probably go away to college and meet someone else and it would be a shame if your daughter wastes her high school years hoping that some boy is being faithful to her.... As far as what happens later in life, you can only sit back watch hope for the best - in 4 years your daughter will be in control of her decisions and hopefully you will have given her all of the right tools in life to make the correct decisions for her:)

Karin - posted on 07/09/2010

She's at the start of puberty. He's nowhere near the end. MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) tests prove that the brain changes during puberty and these changes can leave many teens with emotional imbalances. How can they discern what true love is? Many scientists and doctors have proven through MRI tests that the brain changes during puberty. It would be foolish to think the changes stop somewhere between 18 and 20 years of age. Tests have shown that changes can continue even at the age of 25. Especially men change their minds constantly. Then they like blondes, then they like brunettes. Then they eat fish. Then they hate fish. What is sweet today is irritating tomorrow. The changes in the developing brain detects physiological changes, which would explain why teenagers have emotional outbursts, reckless attitudes, an ardent pursuit of sex, drugs and nocturnal places to party until daylight.
Teenagers not only battle with “raging hormones”, they also don't have the cognitive controls that are needed for mature behaviour. Concern is there for any person between 12 and 25 going into a serious relationship. Depending on the level of maturity, some may marry at 18. Point is, from 0 to 20 we lay the foundation for the rest of our lives. 20 years of which we remember very little at the end of that time. From 20 to 80 .... that's when we reap what we have sowed as teenagers.

Being a parent of a teenager can be difficult. With so many pressures that teenagers have to face, depression increases. The best thing parents and teachers can do is to show a genuine interest in teenagers. Get to know them and support them. The worst thing to do is to neglect them.

Tammy - posted on 07/08/2010

First thing, take their feelings seriously...even though you and I know that a long distance relationship is hard even for mature adults. I like the post about a 'promise' ring, this way you are validating her feelings but you are being a responsible mom also. Has this young man bothered to talk to you or your husband about this?

Rita - posted on 07/08/2010

well you got it a ok way my daughters friend is 13 been with this guy 2 years last week turned 14 and found out she is 4 months pregnant and her parents are soooooo mad her dad threw a chair at the boy.

so let them do what there doing just you can not keep a close eye on the 24/7 they go outside for walks right thats how the girl got pregnant they were out on a walk and well went into the woods .and had sex .........
and after 2 weeks prior telling her mom shes waiting to have sex until after high school

Ann - posted on 07/08/2010

I can't beleive this is even an issue.....I don't understand y a parent (or kid) would think this is ok....

Leslie - posted on 07/08/2010

She has no business accepting a ring and he has not business giving it to her. They are both minors. Enough said.

Trina - posted on 07/08/2010

Okay...I'm not sure where you live...so first and foremost, know the law concerning marriage and parental consent. Most states the age is 18. (In Mississippi, a girl can get married without parental consent at 15).

Second, I think you and your husband need to have a sit-down with both your daughter and boyfriend. Tell them if they want to make an adult decision by getting engaged then a rational discussion is in order. Don't disregard their feelings AND don't lose your temper. Tell them what you said in your post about them being good kids. Explain your concerns calmly. Tell them what the law in your state (or country) says about marriage and parental consent.

And if you don't live in Mississippi...don't give your consent.

Dawn - posted on 07/07/2010

good for dad...I don't know of any laws other then the ones I lay down in my house on this..I'm not sure I would even let her except this ring. He is going off to school and is a young man. If he keeps himself for her and comes back when she is of age then I wish them luck then. But right now at her age she needs to enjoy being a kid and have fun with kids her age. 3yrs is alot when they are that young. Talk to her mom, stand by dad , she has so much child hood left, dont let her throw it away.

Janet - posted on 07/07/2010

mmmmmmmmmmmmm he must be a special dad if he doest approve of this situation - that is what love is by letting his daughter grow up some before she makes adult decisions like this one.

Lori - posted on 07/07/2010

I was married at 17 and had 3 wonderful children with him. Unfortunately it was not a happy marriage. He became abusive and I wished I hadn't missed out on what was left of my childhood. My 14 yr old daughter "dates" but she knows that graduating high school and going to college come before any serious relationships with boys. Otherwise you just miss out on things that later you wish you hadn't.

Gloryanne - posted on 07/07/2010

The ring needs to go back. If they are still together when she's 18 or graduates from high school (whichever is later), he can give it back. Yes, you will be responsible if she lost it and she's 14 - there you go. Also, they both need to spread their wings before they make that kind of commitment. I know that there are some success stories out there, which is great; however, for every sucess story, there are 5 stories of people that did not make it. You need to be a realist and help her to be one, too. She needs to set him free and if he comes back (and she still wants him), it was meant to be.

Steffanie - posted on 07/07/2010

I had a cousin that met her husband when she was in the 8th grade. Both of them were Christians, got their educations, and got married, and have two beautiful boys, and she is expecting her third. If you and your husband supervise her while he is interacting with your daughter, and you know for sure nothing sexual is going on, than your being a responsible parent.

. I speak to your daughter, the boy, and the parents of the boys. Don't belittle their feelings that either of them feel for each other. Being a teenager is hard, scary, and you just feel so strongly! Explain that a promise ring is okay, but at this point in their relationship you and your husband feel it is to premature to accept an engagement ring. Get the boy's parents on your side! I do think it is okay for them to have a friendship, and have chaperoned dates.

That is what my cousin and her now husband's parents did. A church setting or allowing them to have lunch together.. (While your sitting at the other table.) I wish my boys would interact more the opposite sex, as friends... Many people do meet their significant others as young as elementary school... So, don't disregard their feelings for each other. As long as you or his parents supervise, or you allow her to go out as a group... I think it is okay for them to interact. Invite him over to watch movies, or a family outing. If you over react, or let your husband, than your just pushing them together, and sneaking around. I had friends that got very creative at seeing their boyfriends with over strict parents! If you tell her she cannot see him, than believe me, they will find away.

It could be that he will go away to college, and both them will move on, or it could be that their feelings are genuine for each other, and in the future they will be together. You never really know. I think being a parent is a balancing act, and you want your teen to trust you. If not, than you won't know what is going on in her life. Over reacting, causing unneeded drama, or refusing to allow her to see her boyfriend.. Usually blows up in your face. It never ends good... Be supportive of your daughter, and her advocate. At the same time, remember how hard it was to be a teenager. I notice a lot of mom's seem to forget how hard this time in your life is. Being a good mom, doesn't always involved being a unbending judge with a huge gravel.

Anaelisa - posted on 07/06/2010

When I was 17 I got engaged to a 23 year old military man. At the time, I didn't see anything wrong with it.

I am now a parent, and I think I have different ideas on the fact. I think that "kids" should not be in too serious of a relationship at a young age. But, they think they know best. I think that even 19 is too young to know what you want for the rest of your life.

Personally, I don't think you can take anything back at this time. Nothing that you allowed in the past can be undone. But, I wouldn't allow anything new to occur.

If it was me, I would sit them both down and tell them that until she is 18 that this ring is just a promise ring at this time. After she turns 18 it can become something different. I, then, would sit back and hope that it undoes itself by itself. You don't want to become the mean, bad mom that she never turns too. But, you are the mom and you need to protect her.

I think you know what is best. No matter what we say, you know what is better for her than we do. Good luck, and I hope things work out for all of you!

Ramona - posted on 07/06/2010

At 14, she can say anything she wants, she is not of a legal concenting age, so it does not mean a thing. She can say she is a pony too, but that does not make it so. I would tell her that she can get engaged when she is old enough to marry.

Sandy - posted on 07/06/2010

I know it is scarey but the more you try to stop it the more she will want it and it will be "them against you"...tell her that you don't agree with it but you will support her. While he goes and meet college girls be there she will need you cause he will be otherwise occupied....no worries...

Ronnell - posted on 07/06/2010

Well,two of my classmates were engaged when we were in 10th grade(which is ages ago,I'm 42),and they stayed together and got married right out of high school.They have been married for 24 years now.The guy has a rich family so the girl never worked a day in her life.The guy works for his family business which has been quite successful for 3 generations.As for your daughter,I would wait and see what happens when he goes off to college.Also,she should set some goals of her own too for the future.Some people fall in love early it depends on the person.My great-grandmother got married at 14,had 14 children and stayed married over 50 years,so I really don't have a problem with your daughter's age being 14,if she's mature enough.When I was going to school back in the 80s,people were dating as young as 13.She should keep her options open though since he is going away to college.

Cindy - posted on 07/05/2010

Even if they wait to have sex.... I just see this as she is too young to "give" herself to one person. There are other ways to "give" yourself. She will not experience her teen years like the other girls in ther grade... he will be away ( provided they make it that long) and she will ultimately sit and wait for him, giving up her own high school memories. Then when she is a "new" adult and he has a degree, she will give up her dreams and ideas for marriage? If they really l ove each other, the ring should go back in the box.. they remain friends and WAIT to see if they are still interested in one another in about five years.

Michaela - posted on 07/05/2010

let her run with the ball she will fall in and out of love a few more times yet and if she doesnt and this is the one love will conquer all and u cannot change fate

Angie - posted on 07/05/2010

Most likely, he will go to college, meet someone else and that will be the end of that. Or maybe she'll start dating someone else. Since he's not yet 18, there isn't anything legal that you can do. After this relationship is over, and will probably end, tell her that her lack of maturity in this relationship means that she will not be able to date until she is older and more mature; 16 is the rule in our home.

Joan - posted on 07/05/2010

she is way too young to see any boy on a regular basis let alone be engaged.he does sound like a nice young man but she is way to young and immature to be making such big decisions. you're job as her parent is to help her make good decisions.if she is unable you may have to make those decisions for her.as far as the ring if your state requires the ring to be returned if the engagement fails ,then yes you may be responsible if the ring is lost.

Kimberly - posted on 07/05/2010

Thank you for your response. They do not date we do not let them go anywhere alone. They see each other at school and it is not even after school because she is on the bus and coming straight home. That is what I was kinda thinking was promise ring but even that I am not sure on. Yes, I am the mom and yes, I will step up and say what I want and it will be gone by it is just trying to see what people think so I have others thoughts if that makes since.

Mary - posted on 07/05/2010

First of all 1000 dollars? Are you kidding that is too cheap for your daughter you should want better than that for her!
Seriously A promise ring might be permitted! NO Engagement she needs to be with her girl friends.....I told my daughter at a very young age and kept repeating it! She could not date until she was 16. At 14 she should not even be seeing a 17 year old other than in school!! Be the mom! Tell him NO! You dont need a law to help you raise your... Child... Key word here is Child. She is only a child! Let Dad be the bully! He needs to say NO NO NO to the boy!