17 Year old daughter getting calls off her 'father'

Liana - posted on 01/24/2011

WOW what a jerk he is telling her that someone died of something like that. I agree with some of the Mom's about telling her that the doctor knows best and if thought anything more was wrong or serious he would admit her or tell her at least. Also, change your phone number or her cell phone number especially seeing how he is really not a part of her life.

Tonya - posted on 01/24/2011

I agree with everyone but keep in mind that he is her father even though it doesn't give him the right to scare her he might also be scare. This is a time when but parents needs to sit down with her and the doctor(s) and express whatever concern they might have. It can ease the mind of them all.

Karen - posted on 01/21/2011

If her father has put a fright in her ask her if she is comfortable with what the Dr. said or if she would like to have a second opinion. If she would like a second opinion maybe you could offer to set up an appointment and to go with her when she goes because there may be questions you have also that can help to reassure your daughter that everything will be OK.

Louise - posted on 01/12/2011

Your daugter is not a baby any more she understands what the doctors are telling her. Sit her down and ask her if she is satisfied with what the doctors are telling her and if she says no take her to the hospital for a second opinion. If she says yes then these phone calls are having no impact on her. If these calls are getting your daughter down then write him a letter explaining the damage he is doing. This way you can not get into a row and you have got your point across.

Talea - posted on 01/11/2011

I would just reassure my daughter that she should listen to her doctor, and if her dad calls you and screams I would just hang up - my mom taught me a LONG time ago that I don't have to listen to someone disrespect me as an adult woman I can hang up or walk away or ignore them. I will politely say "I am an adult woman when you can address me as such I will be happy to talk to you until then have a nice day." and do whatever you were doing before dismissing them. Do NOT let him get to you or your daughter it will create unnecessary drama and stress doesn't equal a healing environment. Call her doctor with her and talk or schedule another appointment if she is that concerned - get it all in writing what she needs and what her condition is if he is that insistant and document every time he calls or contacts any of you. I'm NOT a nice person when someone messes with my kids especially if it's someone that is supposed to support and care for them. It sounds like he and his parents are a piece of work. At 17 she is almost a legal adult (in the US not sure about Canadian laws). It sounds like he's trying to bully her into returning to him and if that's the case ask her if she really wants to move back with someone that makes her feel this way. (((((hugs))))) I hope things settle down soon. I know it must be stressful.

Julie - posted on 01/11/2011

well all you can do is reassure your daughter that if the doctor thought there was anything wrong then she would have been kept in the hospital. if your ex won't listen then maybe write to him politely explaining what has been done from the first to last doctor or hospital apointment and that she is fine and you will inform him if anything untoward was to happen and that you would apreciate him not scaring her like that any more. keep a photocopy of the letter you write or if you send a txt or email keep it.