angry 11 year old

Barbara - posted on 01/23/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My 11 year old son is always yelling at everyone and anyone as soon as he doesn't get his own way. He also swears at people all the time. HELP!! anyone got any ideas about what I can do to help him?

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Helen - posted on 02/08/2010

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Hi Barbara, my son is 12 and he started similiar behavior at around 11. As soon as he isn't getting what he wants, or I ask him to do something, he flys off the handle. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone, but as far as ideas go I have very few. All we have done is to keep reinforcing the behavior that is expected, and to not give in to him. He has improved, but we have found that if he is anxious about something then he is more likely to act out. Talk to him when he is calm, find out if something is worrying him, there are lots of changes starting at this age.

Allie - posted on 02/07/2010

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some times simple changes to us are dramatic to the child. my 12 yr old had acting out issues when she was 7 yrs old. I had a person at her school that helped her work through her emotions and helped her through anger management. Now this is between her and the lady what was bothering her but it did help. When he does act out he needs to know that there are consequences for his actions too.

Kindle - posted on 02/06/2010

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Something is going on with him....My now 12 year old child was out of control. Not with cussing and all, but I actually got him someone to talk to.

I am guessing Dad is not present? He needs someone to talk to, or a hobby. Skateboarding did it for my son. I had to find something he cared about to use it as a "weapon" for shaping his behavior.

You are mama! Be mama!

Barbara - posted on 02/06/2010

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thank you all for the advice. sometimes i guess we all need a bit of an outside look to put things back into perspective.

Erica - posted on 01/23/2010

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Make sure not to let the behavior go unannounced. When he misbehaves, take a few minutes out of whatever you are doing and explain to him exactly why what he's doing is wrong. I find if I give my 9 year old the power to know what is wrong and right, he stops himself before doing it again and is proud of himself! Hope this helps....

Angelina - posted on 01/23/2010

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Have there been changes in his life of recent, or changes in his behaviour in general. Maybe something is happening at school with friends and he does not know how to express it. Kids help line is a good way for him to get things off his chest. He can go online and chat with a counsellor. Sometimes it's just a different voice or face our kids need to reach out to, Don't cut yourself up to much, I know its hard but we get through.

Give it a try.

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