Can Mom help heal a broken heart?

Cynthia - posted on 08/11/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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After a year and a half with his "first love" my 18 year old is experiencing his first break up. He didn't see it coming and is aboslutely heart broken. He and his girlfriend are both starting college at different schools with about 6 hours distance between them and had made the decision to stay together through the transition and try to make a long distance relationship work. With two weeks to go until she moves she sprung the news on him this weekend that she "just doesn't feel the same" , and wants to do the college transition herself. While he is trying to respect her decision it doesn't take away his pain. It has been soooo hard to watch him go through this... and I have learned a new parenting lesson.... Its harder to watch your child go through their first heart break then living through your own!! Does anyone have any Mom advice for mending broken hearts, or creative suggestions for how I can support him through this difficult period of transition?

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Mona - posted on 08/11/2009

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My son went through this last fall. His girlfriend (first love) went away to college and he was just starting his senior year.
Although I was preparing him for the breakup that would most likely happen, it still hurt him.
I did not belittle his feelings saying it was puppy love and get over it. Instead, I told him I was there for him if he needed to talk. I also encouraged him to get out of the house and spend time with his buddies. I didn't want him sitting at home just thinking and thinking... we all know how nuts that can make us. I also told the rest of the family to give him some slack for awhile... no bitching about chores and whatnot.
It took a few weeks before I saw him really smile again.
Mona - http://moremilestones.blogspot.com

Sandy - posted on 08/11/2009

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You are so right...It is much more difficult to watch your children go through this! I know it will sound small...but listening is the best thing you can do right now. He needs to find out on his own that life will go on and there will be other girls. Be there for him and encourage him to spend time with his friends because the busier he is the less he will be thinking about her....and the faster he will heal. Good Luck!

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