College called and said son is in the hosptial after he attempted suicide...

Kirra - posted on 01/21/2012 ( 302 moms have responded )

156

0

1

My son is in college and he is the oldest one out of my three boys well he goes to the University of Florida and he is an extremely bright kid and I love him dearly. Well we got a call today first from the school that our son was in the ICU after attempting suicide and then after i hung up with them the hospital called to basically say the same thing well my husband and I are going to head up there here shortly we talked to his girlfriend who actually found him and she is so distraught I don’t know what to do no one saw it coming he is one of the most happiest kids you will ever meet!!! I don’t know what to feel or anything I am not sure how to tell his little brothers!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

302 Comments

View replies by

Kirra - posted on 02/22/2012

156

0

1

Yeah i hope so just hope he sticks to this decision and goes and gets the help he needs to get straightened out because honestly he has been crying all night again and i have been trying to calm him down but nothing works and his fiancee is at work for another half hour.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

Can't sleep although he has agreed to try out a residential facility for a few months his fiancee was able to convince him last night when they went to bed.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

Night time really seems to be bad for him he is back to uncontrollably crying and he doesn't know why.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

I suppose i think meds are starting to work not sure gonna keep close eye on him.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

Well he is deff doing better today in the kitchen cooking us all dinner :O

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

At least he will get some sleep just wished i could still calm him down and everything. Yeah i am going to bed i will update later tomorrow or is it today lol.

Karla - posted on 02/21/2012

1,555

48

87

I'm sure that does hurt, on the other hand at least someone can calm him down.



Time to let your problems go and get some rest.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

I am about to go to sleep His fiancee came out and took him to bed she seems to be able to calm him down and console him better then me lately and that hurts to be honest :(.

Karla - posted on 02/21/2012

1,555

48

87

Oh wow, okay. It's good he ate though. I hope he can sleep. I hope you can rest a little as well. What a horrible ordeal your family is going through. Sometimes it goes from taking it "one day at a time." to "one hour at a time."



I'd be tempted to read him a upbeat story. ;-) A bedtime story I guess.



:-)

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

He said he was with one of his friends and that his friend made him eat a rather large meal and his fiancee texted said friend and he confirmed. He missed a couple of doses of his meds while he was gone and he said he is willing to do whatever it takes to get better so long as we don't readmit him. I am staying up with him as he is curled up on the couch crying cause he is scared to sleep cause he thinks i will have him taken in his sleep or something.

Karla - posted on 02/21/2012

1,555

48

87

Wow. I would definitely want to consult with his doctor and counselor about how to proceed. You can't have him running away, and he needs to have care to get better.



I wonder if he ate anything during that time away... back when the kids were little my remedy was "snack and a nap" ; it's seems to help adults as well.



Did he miss some meds while he was gone as well?



If he's a reader I wonder if he would read about what he needs to do to help himself?



Sorry, I'm sure you know in times like this everyone wishes they knew the answer, but no one seems to have one. I hope he accepts the help he need.

Kirra - posted on 02/21/2012

156

0

1

Not sure he has been crying really badly and is begging us not to readmit him and that he will eat and everything just don't readmit him. And yeah 7+ hours still trying to figure out where he went and or where he was and everything.

Karla - posted on 02/21/2012

1,555

48

87

Oh gosh, I'm glad he's okay. But now what? If he doesn't understand the reasons for being in the hospital, and the need to work on getting better, what do you do?



Was he missing for that long too ... like 7 hours?



I'm still hoping for the best.

Kirra - posted on 02/20/2012

156

0

1

WE found him he went back to his fiancee and showed up at there apartment around midnight.

Karla - posted on 02/20/2012

1,555

48

87

Oh my Kirra, I'm sorry to hear this. I hope you find him soon. It sounds as though he might try to head to his fiance's; at least I hope so. I'm hoping for the best.

Kirra - posted on 02/20/2012

156

0

1

That’s what he was doing Jane when he was at home sitting and or crying for hours that’s what he did when we saw him on Sunday/Saturday. That is also what he did last time he was in the hospital.

Jane - posted on 02/20/2012

2,390

262

484

He is so resistant to the meds, and now he has the energy to escape. Most depressives lack energy and would either sleep for many more hours than normal or simply sit and cry.

Jane - posted on 02/20/2012

2,390

262

484

I hope you find him soon. He sounds as if he has something other than simple depression going on.

Kirra - posted on 02/20/2012

156

0

1

I honestly don’t know where he would go we checked home nothing checked with his friends nothing not sure where he would go.

Kirra - posted on 02/20/2012

156

0

1

My son is missing his fiancée and I went to go see him and talk things over and the hospital said somehow he escaped and is now missing.

Denise - posted on 02/20/2012

37

56

8

Until you know what is going on with your oldest, I would just tell the 2 youngest boys that you are going to go see him and then sit down and tell them the truth. I hope that he will be alright. Sometimes kids attempt suicide when they are feeling overwhelmed by stress from school and trying to make sure that they don't disappoint their family. Being the oldest child can do that to a person.

Kirra - posted on 02/19/2012

156

0

1

Thanks going to call the insurance and see how long they will ok for and then his fiancée and I are going to go see him and see if he will go along with it I hope he will because he is still on my insurance and get the help he needs now rather than later. His fiancée has been in tears tonight!

Jane - posted on 02/19/2012

2,390

262

484

If he isn't eating the way a normal college-aged young man eats, then you have cause for concern. If a man his age cries about it, then you have reason for concern. He actually does understand deep down why you admitted him, but until he can bring it out in the open and accept it and then do something about it, you have cause for concern. Not eating is a symptom of depression, and depression is one of his big problems. Not eating shows that his depression is not yet under control.



As you have already discovered, you cannot watch him 24 hours a day. Since he needs such watching, the hospital is the place he needs to be.



As to how long someone is in residential treatment, it will vary, depending on how well the person does. Our insurance company okayed six months but my son was released after five because he had made all the progress they felt he was going to make. He backslid a little after coming home but he has never been that bad again.

Sue - posted on 02/19/2012

17

11

0

never think you are overreacting, sometimes all the pressure is too much for someone so young. just knowing you love and support him will do wonders. also a license psychiatrist who can prescribe meds can do wonders. I am praying for all of you (including that future grandbaby, congrats! a baby is always a blessing)

Kirra - posted on 02/19/2012

156

0

1

I will give it a try and I will bring his fiancée alone I hope he accepts it all but I am doubtful. He is extremely stubborn. When we went and saw him though he cried and doesn’t understand why I readmitted him he says he isn’t hungry and why it’s wrong not to eat when you’re not hungry I hope I didn’t mess up and he just wasn’t hungry and I admitted him for not being hungry that would make me feel so upset.

Jane - posted on 02/19/2012

2,390

262

484

Yes, he would have to agree. However, if it is deemed truly necessary there are legal steps you can take to make him go.



I think it will depend on how it is presented to him and how often he can see you and his gf. You might also point out that he can't help his gf with her pregnancy or even be a good father if he doesn't get himself to a more stable place.

Kirra - posted on 02/19/2012

156

0

1

Does he have to agree to going? Is that how long it normally is? I am not sure he would agree because then he would miss most of his fiancées pregnancy and I am pretty sure that would really upset him,.

Jane - posted on 02/19/2012

2,390

262

484

My son was in residential treatment for five months. I was allowed, actually required, to see him every Friday, first for a joint counseling session, and then just for fun. If he had met his goals for the week there were a few times when I took him "off-campus" as they called it for a reward of having dinner at a restaurant of his choice. It was a little bit like having a child off at summer camp.



Residential treatment is secure and safe, like the hospital, and it means he can have daily counseling sessions, both individual and group. It is much more intense than anything he could get at home. He has already made the break from home by going off to college. Perhaps if you talked to him about it as being a school, if you will, for learning how to keep yourself on track after an event like his breakdown, he could see it as a form of college. Certainly you are not abandoning him, but you are encouraging him to learn how to keep himself enjoying life, so he can go on to other things, such as marriage, fatherhood, and a career.



http://www.nmha.org/go/help/finding-help... is a resource to find residential treatment centers, although the doctors may recommend a few. Check them out to be sure they seem to be a good fit for your son, and then see if you can talk him into it.



Good Luck! Residential treatment was invaluable for my son. He still has a lot of problems, but he is no longer a suicide risk and he has made huge strides in keeping his anger under control.

Kirra - posted on 02/19/2012

156

0

1

My insurance will cover that kind of thing however I am worried and scared about sending him away to something like that as he will think I am abandoning him and I don’t want that plus his fiancée might have some reservations about it too I am just really unsure about that option!

Jane - posted on 02/19/2012

2,390

262

484

I think I have gotten rid of the virus that was keeping from posting here (I hope so!).



I just wanted to say that right now the hospital is the safest place for your son. Take this time to rest and shore up your own defenses and strengths for when he comes home again. Look for a support group locally - talking to us on the Internet can be very helpful, but sometimes you really need to be face-to-face with someone who cares and understands.



It may be that your son should go to residential treatment for some months, until he really is on the right track and his meds have stabilized. If that should turn out to be the case you might also take time now to look into your options. Those places can be expensive, but insurance can cover much of the cost if it is willing to do so. You also need to find a place you trust.



And as far as alternative methods go, there is nothing wrong with looking into them and trying some of them after he is out and doing pretty well, but right now I think using the hospital and medications will be the safest way to keep your son on the road back.

Kirra - posted on 02/18/2012

156

0

1

I apperceait your efforts but i am not equipped to handle my son the people at the hospital are and i think meds are the best option for him at the moment.

Leslie - posted on 02/18/2012

20

21

1

Hi Kirra,



I really recommend that you seek nutritional alternatives.



http://www.prisonplanet.com/whitney-hous...



I KNOW that you care about your son. WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU CARE!!!!



Investigate the alternatives. Here is a website with some information: http://www.alternativementalhealth.com/



Please understand that I'm only giving you information that I have found based on research. These aren't my opinions per se. Here is another site which shed light on the chemical imbalance theory:

When do They Test for Chemical Imbalance?

As of 2009, there are no conclusive tests that exist to test for a chemical imbalance.

Read more: Testing for Chemical Imbalance | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/way_5516127_testing-...



I can help you research other alternatives as well. You and your son deserve to have all the information.

Kirra - posted on 02/17/2012

156

0

1

Its ok he was refusing to eat and wouldn't drink anything just had to do it wouldn't let him starve himself.

Kirra - posted on 02/13/2012

156

0

1

He isn't allowed to drink and mix his meds i freaked out on him about that. And yes one day at a time.

Sara - posted on 02/13/2012

126

0

1

Drinking and head meds don't mix at all. Neither do drinking and recent suicide attempts. Please make sure his girlfriend and friends know that, if you can. Alcohol is a depressant.



Often after a hospitalization friends and family want badly to see the person back to normal, give him a good normal time. Cheer him up. The person himself may want desperately to be normal again, too. But he's really very ill, just like anyone else who's recently out of the hospital -- it's not a matter of cheering-up. He needs regular sleep, convalescence, etc.



Please talk with his doctors about what he should and should not be doing while recovering. And again, the NAMI Family people are the ones with experience. Here are the contacts for Florida: http://bit.ly/z3UCga .

Karla - posted on 02/13/2012

1,555

48

87

I know he's young and wants to have fun with friends, but I'm wondering if drinking and the medications he takes are okay to mix. He might want to ask his doctor about that.



Sorry for you that he stayed out so late, but I'm glad to hear he had a good time.



One day at a time, right? :-)

Kirra - posted on 02/12/2012

156

0

1

Thanks he was actually drunk never seen my kid drunk but he just went in and fell asleep at least he didn't drive his friends dropped him off.

  1. 1
  2. 2
  3. 3
  4. 4
  5. 5
  6. 6
  7. 7
If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms