Connecting with my teenage daughter
ive learnt with my daughter to let her make the suggestions for our time together ive found take it makes things alot easier ,plus it makes her feel special at the same time coz im doing something she wants .also when we spend this time together we talk about life and stuff and she knows that she come and talk about anything that she has on her mind ,i know not all teens are the same mind she does have her mood swings and throws tempers but when we have our QT together its when she is wanting it so she is in a good mood so it makes it alot easier lol and the mood is relaxed.
Nickie - posted on 11/22/2008
Thanks to everyone for their suggestions, I will try them out. I am having a difficult time getting her to "open up". I have selected a special, dedicated time once a week that is for just the two of us, however because of my work schedule it is only 2 hours (long story behind that one). Anyhow, I think I got to focused on accomplishing a task with her instead of just being with her. So, I've told her that next week gets to plan ahead of time what we will do. Good thing we love the same music (which is one of the reasons I have been suprised about why this hasn't been easier?) I thought she would consider me cool! I have such a new found respect for my own mom and what I put her through! I loved the idea about the baby pictures, because it's true--- they love it to be all about them...which it should be :) Also loved the idea about volunteering. I think it is very important to show our kids just how lucky they really are. My children have a nice house, ipods, computer, things other children would die for. I have a Sub for Santa project coming up that I'll try to get her "into", but again, unless it's HER idea, it's been hard to get her sold on anything. Let's keep the idea's coming, and thank you all so very much for the replies :) Blessings to you all and your teenage daughters....we can make it through this! ugghh!
Samantha - posted on 11/21/2008
I too thought that I had dragged my daughter through the preteens and all would be good. I was under the misconception that being a Mom was almost easy compared to everything else life threw at my daughter and I. THEN THE DRAMA SET IN. Everything is a drama. The one thing that keeps us at least on the same planet is we have MOMMY/HANNAH time. And nothing interferes with that. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING short of death (which has interrupted).
Dawn - posted on 11/21/2008
Really, nothing is "cool" to do with your mom. BUT, some suggestions on getting them interested in a project isn't too hard. Some things I do with my girls are simple, get out their "baby" pictures or pics not organized yet, (all kids love to see themself) and start laying them out....ask them what their favorite pictures are and offer to start a new scrapbook/album of them and/or their friends. The girls love this. Bring home hairstyle magazines, ALL girls, ok maybe not All, but most girls love to look at new hair styles, then join in when you can, again, which one s do they like. The key is to make it about them, they can't resist. LOL. These may not target your girls but use the basic idea. Is it fashion, hair, celeb mags, animals? There are great animal mags you can get at PetSmart or Petco. Find THEIR passion and go with it. If they love animals, volunteer together at the ASPCA, kids under 15 (i think is the limit) has to have a parent companion with them while they are working. You're not pushing yourself on them, it's just a requirement...lol. I have a ton of diferent ideas, let me know if ant of these help.
Yvonne - posted on 11/21/2008
I have the same drams. Everyday it's something. Anything that I say or any idea I have is not cool. My dtr will be 16 in April and the same as you Jackie very self centered at times. I wonder in amazement sometimes. I am a nurse and so opposite. I thought i thought her better. I would like some ideas of good QT time and I like the idea of volunteering somewhere too.
Jackie - posted on 11/21/2008
I feel your pain, my sweet little girl is slowly evolving into a very self-centered drama queen. I am going to try getting the two of us involved in volunteering locally. I need to find something to take the focus off of her, and help her appreciate how easy she has it. I'll let you know how it goes.
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