Dating?

Alex - posted on 07/09/2012

I let my eldest daughter go on group dates when she was fifteen. She is extremely trust worthy, so i always thought she would do the right things. I was nervous about sending her out on the first time. She had gotten a boy friend last year, but I didn't start letting them hang out alone until this year. So I let her date at seventeen. To be honest, there really isn't an honest answer. It depends on your child. If you think they have the right morals and good judgement, then they should be fine. I would hold back a more... experimental child.

Jen - posted on 04/26/2012

14

Kathy - posted on 12/16/2011

MOMS , DADS, I AM A 14 YEAR OLD MALE , I KNOW I AM IMPERSENATING A WOMEN BUT IF U NEED TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT UR CHILDREN ASK ME . I AM 14 I KNOW HOW UR CHILDREN THINK AT THE AGE OF ADOLESCENCE SO FEEL FREE TO ASK AND I'LL TELL U WHAT I THINK , AND I HOPE I'LL BE HELPFUL :) TY

Kimberley - posted on 10/30/2011

15 and a half!

Kelly - posted on 10/30/2011

18! in college!

Cheri - posted on 10/29/2011

I am sticking to the age-old rule of 16 for "REAL" dating with cars and/or outings with the opposite sex.

My daughter started "liking" boys in seventh grade and they all call it "going together," but I am not worried because none of them can drive so they don't "go" anywhere together. It has been a text back and forth or a phone call here and there, but no outings and time to be together alone. It helps when the other parent of the boy is on the same page.

We've already had the "talk" with all of our children at age 11 and again at 12 because in this day and age, you can't do it too soon. That is sad to say, but I would rather my kids be educated and knowledgeable with correct information than stuff they hear from their friends that is misinformation...and, yes, we use proper terminology.

I have seen too many of my own friends have children that have made mistakes that have caused alterations in future plans due to unplanned pregnancy. It does not discriminate across socioeconomic levels and these particular friends are college-educated and very successful. I pray it never happens to me.

Jasmine - posted on 06/18/2010

i think it depends on the attitude of your teen n also the relationship with the person they wish to date. my son is 13 n half and his dating a gal same age. they have known each other since kindy. there relationship is serious to them and are on the same page. they have started holding hands. and im happy with that. open communication with them helps you see if they are ready.

Ayu - posted on 06/18/2010

I know I was a late starter, I dated for the first time at 19. But nowadays, I'm thinking, I would feel OK if my daughter (now 16) told me that she was going out with someone at 17.
It also depends on the child's emotional maturity. Everyone's different.

Alison - posted on 06/18/2010

My daughter is 14 and has a "boyfriend". But for her it's someone she holds hands with at school and spends massive amounts of time talking to on the phone lol. They haven't been on a "date". I told my children they had to be 13 to "date", but at that age it would have to be a group "date" or something similar. I think it depends on the child, and how mature they are, and how much you trust them too. I try and not stress about it - keep the lines of communication open with your children too, good luck.

Chris - posted on 06/17/2010

dating- dating like one on one? 15 or 16. depends on how mature the child is, and what the age difference is between them and the one they love. my 10 yr olds have had "boyfriends" just like labels at school, around their other friends. and going out on group dates is cool for younger than 15 but I can't picture being mature enough younger than that. I know I wasn't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and I was allowed to date younger. BIG mistake. just don't make a big deal about stuff so the kids will be open with you... esp about the things that are important. like dating!:)

Nicole - posted on 06/16/2010

I think that 16 is a good age as their has been rules set.

Paula - posted on 06/12/2010

Haven`t had to worry yet about my son wanting to date. He`s almost 16 years old but isn`t interested in any girls yet.He does talk to them but that`s it for now. Our daughter is only 10 and thinks boyfriends are gross,lol. Hoping that lasts a few more years.

Joan - posted on 06/12/2010

my kids were allowed to date one on one at age 16

Debbie - posted on 06/12/2010

My daughter is 15 ,she says all the boys she knows are booger pickers.So she evedently is not ready to have a real boyfriend.She does hang out with friends though.

Kim - posted on 06/12/2010

We home school. Our kids have friends from church, home school groups, field trips, etc., so they are quite socialised. That said, when my oldest was 13, we had a discussion about dating. I explained I felt people don't truly understand the concept of dating until they are at least 16. My child wasn't interested in dating so we agreed on a start dating age of 16. Prior to turning 16, we had another talk - it was decided, not by me, but by my teen-ager, that 18 sounded much better. About to turn 19, dating still isn't an issue as school and work come first - and this mom's not worried.
My younger children are following the same path of just having friendships and not looking at dating as something of interest quite yet.
I grew up in public school, saw all the "couples" together one week, split the next and coupled with different people the following week. Learning from my own mistakes (and what I felt were multiple "broken hearts") I explained to my kids why I felt waiting was better. Thankfully my children (so far) agree they would rather wait to date.
But I feel it depends on how comfortable your relationship is with your child - if they feel they can tell you anything, you'll know when they want to date ... and you'll know whether or not they're ready for dating. Just keep the lines of communication open as this one has no easy answer - every child is different.

Jackie - posted on 06/11/2010

I think it depends on their maturity, and how well you trust them. As long as you have an open realationship where you talk, then you will know when the time is right. Just make sure your kids are well informed about sex, and why it is important to hold off on that. we have to remember what we felt like at that age and things we did, and just be open and honest, let them know the mistakes you made and that you dont want them to repeat your mistakes. Most of all you have to do what you yourself are comfortable with.

Jane - posted on 06/11/2010

My daughter came to me in 6th grade and asked if she could have a boyfriend. I asked her what kids her age were doing with their boyfriends, and where they went. She said they did nothing and went nowhere. I told her she could have as many of that type of boyfriend as she wanted.

Later, at 14, she asked about dating. Group dates, in public and well-lit locations, I said. One-on-one dating at sixteen. Because let's face it, it's hard to date one-on-one when Mommy or Daddy has to drive you. :)

Let them lead. When they ask, you answer. Pick your battles and look for what you can say "yes" to. Save "no" for when you really, really need it.

Mary Ann - posted on 06/11/2010

I am glad to hear you say that maturity has increased. In our area, dating means all kinds of sexual indulgence, even at these yound ages. My daughter has been through so much turmoil because of boys who are out to use her. But here, even 17 year olds are just as bad. Boys have no honor or respect for the female gender and most girls have gone that way themselves. These kids are being used and hurt beyond what should be the normal heartbreak of these years, with much damage to take into their future marriages. I am amazed at how educated we think we are and even in the view of the rising divorce statistics, our society is hell bent on destroying us. Girls still want to be loved and cherished-that will never change. They need to be protected because of the long term damage they are suffering. And it is their children that usually suffer. Dating? They have lost what dating is all about.

Telika - posted on 06/10/2010

i think around 13 you should have group supervised dating and 16 should be the best time,then it depends on the maturity level and the trust good luck

Melinda - posted on 06/10/2010

Just like pretty much everyone else said, every teenager is different, for me my daughter's 1st year of Jr. High she was12 she wanted to have a boyfriend and I was really hesitant but I allowed her to giving her a talk 1st and it lasted about 1 month then the second one lasted about 2 months and now she is over that for now. She only did the boyfriend/girlfriend at school and over the phone. As far as her going to the movies or something like that, I think she will have to wait til she get older unless I go with them and sit in the back of the movies.

Sarah - posted on 06/10/2010

I think 15 or 16 depending on the responsibility part. I have a 15 yr old and she does have a 16 yr old boyfriend. He does have his license. Before we (my hubby and I) decided to let her loose with this boy, my hubby had a nice long sit down talk with this boy about driving and curfew times to be home and how he should treat our daughter. Since we have had that talk, her boyfriend is respectful to our daughter and to us parents.

Cara - posted on 06/10/2010

I think there is no right age for dating. My dd13 has a boyfriend, but they are not allowed to go out on actual dates. He is allowed here, around the family, and goes places with us. (I think we might have adopted him, lol)
I have talked to both of them about focusing on friendship first. As long as he is willing to be a friend to the family, and not just her, then he is welcome.
As far as one-on-one dating goes, it depends on the maturity of the people. She has said many times that she isn't ready, and might be ready when she gets engaged, lol.
He does have his license, and I did let her ride in his car with him, but she took her sister with her as a chaperon, and we were going the same place.
I agree with another mom about not allowing boyfriends/girlfriends and that causing 'sneaky' behavior. I have friends who set arbitrary ages or just say no on the subject, and see the result of boy crazy girls when mom isn't around.

Stacie - posted on 06/10/2010

16.

Maria - posted on 06/09/2010

Gosh, if I had a girl NEVER.... We like our kids to "date" as a group of kids. But I cannot say how long that will last.

Adrienne - posted on 06/09/2010

well my son wasnt allowed to date until now, But i dont know if its in group or face to face. Oh my son is 15 yrs but going on 16.

Tracey - posted on 06/07/2010

My daughter went out with boys as friends from age 12 and let it develop from there. Think it is important for kids to have friends of the opposite sex without romance getting in the way.

Dina - posted on 06/06/2010

They will when they are ready! My 14 yr old son that he likes a girl at school but is not ready to date....whatever that means is alright with us (as parents) at the moment.

Jane - posted on 06/06/2010

My daughter didn't have her first boyfriend until 15-1/2 and then we let her go out on group dates. 16 for one on one car dates. She's still with him almost 4 years later :) My son was 14-1/2 when he met his now girlfriend (he's 16-1/2 now) but they met at the mall with friends and we had to take him because his girlfriend is an hour away (they met at summer camp). She wasn't allowed to date until 16 and she's a few months younger than him so it was pretty easy. Now that they're both 16, he goes to her house, she comes here but he doesn't drive yet so no car dates as of yet.....but he gets his license on Tuesday so it's coming (uggghhhh).

Sherri - posted on 06/06/2010

16

Tina - posted on 06/06/2010

LOL wow 30 maybe LOL I know that sound crazy I have a 13yr old daughter and I still think she is too young. Thankfully she isn't ready and too into her academics. I guess I would say maybe 16 depending on their maturity and behavior.

Georgette - posted on 06/06/2010

18 ^_^ in my fantasy world ^_^ once school is done BUT my son started GROUP dateing at age 14 YET he is the Smart one ^_^ my other son is 13 and horrormones kicking strong so I would put a warning shirt on him ^_^ and have big bro escort along with group dateing

Betty - posted on 06/06/2010

My daughter started dating when she was 17, before she was just not interested in dating so everyone is different. Some teens are ready at 16 to date.

Dianna - posted on 06/03/2010

Our 14 year old daughter has had "boyfriends" at school, but isn't officially allowed to "go out" on a one-on-one date until she's 16. She runs track so she got to spend time with her boyfriend, also a track runner at meets. I attend the meets so it was actually cute to see them sitting together and talking. This last one lasted about 2 months and is now over. This has worked well, as she is not afraid to talk to me about boys and who she likes. Alot of her friends, who are not allow to have boyfriends will sneak and have boyfriends and don't talk to their parents about them at all. I want my daughters to feel comfortable talking to me about anything and everything.

Holly - posted on 06/03/2010

I have a daughter that is almost 13 and a son that is 14. Both of them are allowed to talk to their boyfriend/girlfriend (of the moment) on the phone and at school or school functions, but not outside of that. For my family, 15 or 16 will be the age I will let them go on a date, maybe to a movie or an organized function...and of course they are always welcome at our home when I am there for movies, games, etc with my family. I have an 18 year old boy also, so I have been through this already. What a huge difference in maturity between 14 and 16 makes!!

Tamara - posted on 06/03/2010

In at least 16, some are not ready yet.

Angie - posted on 06/03/2010

15 for group outings. 16 for one on one dating.

Louise - posted on 06/03/2010

Each person is different. My sons started to date at year 6 primary schol. here they class dating as a grilfriend coming over and playing games. My older son dated properly at age 15 and my younger son is now 16 and is still not dating properly. He will when he is ready.

Clare - posted on 06/03/2010

I think it very much depends on the local area where you live - it's obvious from other posts on here that it varies massively! I've always taken the view that if the child thinks they are ready then they probably are - do remember that what they call "going out" may vary hugely from what it means to you. My daughter has "been out" with lots of people and initially it didn't actually seem to mean anything - just a label. They didn't actually go anywhere or kiss or hold hands.
I know friends of my daughter whose parents have not allowed them to have boyfriends/girlfriends and all that seems to do is end up with the young person being secretive about it which personally I think is a bad idea since it sets a pattern.
Also depends on the age of the other young person - when my daughter has wanted to go out with someone older we've always had a chat about them maybe expecting more from the relationship than she does. Hope this helps.