How do you deal to a teen with smartmouth!

Mary - posted on 07/07/2009 ( 17 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 14 and she think's she knows everything.

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Gina - posted on 05/29/2013

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My daughter is 14 1/2 and she has been very mouthy that got progressingly worse over the last year. She is constantly nasty, has a horrible tone towards me, rolls her eyes as me. It drives me in sane. I have taken away her ipod now for the last month or so due to bad grades in school and smart mouth. But, unfortunately, it has not helped. I am ready to lose my mind. I don't think she is every going to learn the proper way to respect me. She pretty much gets anything her heart desires. Her brother is who is 11 is the complete opposite, loving, sweet. If he tends to get smart, I only have to remind him and he stops. I just don't get it. I am at my wit's end.

Kristinn - posted on 07/10/2009

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Didn't we all know everything at that age? And no one understood us. I think it's just patientce and listening. At that age kids are trying to find out who they are. It's best to gently guide them through the tough times then to argue and fight. Pick your battles wisely and remember what it was like to be her age. Obviously you need to set your foot down and ensure she respects you and other adults.

I used to think I knew everything but now I turn to my mom for her opinions and advice all the time.

As the mother of a teenager I've accepted the fact that my intelligence is inversly related to his age. The older he gets...the dumber I become. But I know that at some point things will change. Just another fun teenage stage. Kind of like when they were 3 and wanted to "do it by themselves'

Kristi - posted on 07/07/2009

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One thing I find with my teen is that he DOES know a lot. He just wants to be treated like a young adult and not a little kid. Teens just want someone to listen. At their age they also learn more from us in times of non-conflict. Spend some time with her, ask about her life, and listen more than you talk. I find that the less I talk the more my teen will.

Tina - posted on 07/07/2009

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Well, for me.. I tell my son this with the MOM LOOK " Would you like to rephrase your words and tone before I accidently rearrange your teeth". Dont miss understand me, I dont go around smaking my kids around espeically in their mouth. I have smack my son 1 time in his mouth for talking back to me when he was younger. AS of today, he recalls that moment and when I tell him to rephrase his words and tone memory recall kicks back in and he snaps out of it.

The thing is, when it comes to teenagers... you cant start parenting at that age group. You have set limits for kids when they a little. Parents today are afraid to discipline their kids today. I tell my kids, all the time... If you ever call the cops on me for spanking you when you needed a spanking, and tell them I was abusing you... When I get out of jail, I will spank you again.

I know this may sound like I spank my kids often but in all honsety I dont. I am a single mom of 12 yrs. I have commiunated with my kids, told them about my mistakes when I was a kid, and even shared my first sexual expeirence with them.. just to educate them on how I naive I was when i was a kid. So, when it came to discipline, my kids were easy to sit down and talk to and rather than having to spank them all the time for doing little kid stuff. Now, when they needed a spanking they got it, but as of today I have a 16 yr old and a 12 yr old. and they are both well behaved kids. But if I had to take my shoe off in public and spank them for throwing a temper tantrum in the middle of the store becasue they didnt get a toy, you better believe I would take my flip flop off in a minute to pop their little legs. You just have to be consistance when it comes to teenagers and set boundries...

Sorry for rambling.

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Michelle - posted on 07/22/2011

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I really haven't seen too much attitude from my 14 1/2 year old. Yet. She gets really b***y once a month, but all I have to do is ask, "About to start, huh?" and she keeps herself in check. We take that into consideration, too, and avoid 'poking the tiger' during that time. On the rare occasions she does act like a brat, we threaten to take her iTouch away from her. Threats alone work with her..mainly because she knows we'll do it. We took her TV out of her room when she started kindergarten because of the way she was behaving, and she only just now got one back, 8 years later...and even then, it's only for DVD's. So she knows how serious we are.
She's always been an easy kid..no terrible twos, or threes..just a little acting out when we put her in a new kindergarten instead of her old preschool. A little bump here and there, but nothing like what I've seen my friends go through with their kids. Either God really loves me, or He knows I'm not strong enough to handle a really difficult kid....she's just an easygoing, happy kid like she has been her whole life.

Tammy - posted on 07/24/2009

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when i tell her NO once she continues to say why , why....thats when i get her in face and let her know im serious. she is coming along i see her changing ..what does your daughter do? or say?

Tammy - posted on 07/24/2009

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join the club.....my daughter is 14 .... the looks , the attitude.....just take things away! start with computer, phone, :) i took her door down.....my sister gave me the advise and boy it works.

Jenny - posted on 07/23/2009

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I find with my teen (13) that a lot of times her attitude comes 1. during PMS, even though she hasn't started yet, she still pms's every month with me (for the last 2+ yrs!) so I let her know she needs to check it. and 2. comes from her being preoccupied/worried about something going on. So, first I determine what the issue is, if it is PMS I let her know she will change it or go to her room, or I will give her to the count of 15 to revise attitude or ____ will be taken away (hint, start with least loved- and build up to most loved) for 24 hrs. Did that one time to a new outfit she wanted to wear, made her stand up and take notice. And if it is a worry on her mind, I try to talk to her about what is "bugging" her. She and I have great communication most of the time because I make it a daily habit- I sit with her outside for 10 min before bus comes for school, we have "chat time" when she needs it- and overall she is a great girl. I also make this habit for my other 2 up and coming teens (10 and 8, almost 11 and 9). I find a lot of the time her attitude comes from wanting to be heard. Do you remember how frustrated you were when a teen and your parents treated you less than? Give her/him the respect you wish you had growing up!

Ana Lisa - posted on 07/22/2009

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I have a thirteen year old and I jst have here start her sentense all over again with out any attitude.I tell her loose the bad tone and we can speak.Some times she has to repeat her self about 3 times before we can start.

Suzanne - posted on 07/22/2009

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I usually take away the computer from her it seems to work pretty well. In a day or so she is begging for it back :D I take it away for a week at a time and so if she has attitude with me or anyone else in the house she doesn't get it back until the attitude is better.

Christine - posted on 07/21/2009

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My daughter just turned 12 and it seems like her personality changed to! This was a good post because I was about 2 seek the same post.I almost cant believe its the same child from time 2 time,it can be heart breaking. I hate being the bad guy from time 2 time but when its necesarry I will!!

Rhonda - posted on 07/18/2009

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I have 2 teenage boys ages 13 -14 there 14mons apart...and no they are no angles and they fight like cats and dogs and that mouth let me tell you...I ask them some times if they feel like have teeth for dinner."Because if you keep talking to me that way., That is what your going to have"..No I dont go around beating on my kids...But I agree with Tina 100%...if my kids needed a spanken they got one no matter where we were at...Because to me telling them you wait until you get home...Well heck they have forgotten or you have and then what good did that do...Nothing so then the next time it would be worres..

Leslie - posted on 07/10/2009

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I have been experimenting with when she does it. I find if she calls while with friend...and I make her call me NOT text, and she gets smart I have told her I will just hang up (and have). Usually she needs something so that is not good for her. If we are together, I have learned to just be quiet and walk away. If she persists I tell her to call or ask dad or talk to me later when she has a better attitude and go do something I need or want to do. Of course all of this we talked about first and told her how it would work...no suprises, most of the time I find they don't think we will follow thru. I have been lucky as this has really worked.But both my girls know that they don't loose privileges but get chores and not fun ones. Usually weeding/windows...or things that are not easy. Not sure how it will on the youngest but hopefully I will be smarter by then. Good luck.

Sheng - posted on 07/10/2009

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mine is going 14, she think she knows everything.. i am trying to adjust also.. ughhh!! i never thought that being a mom of a teen is bit hard!

Christy - posted on 07/10/2009

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I know how you feel! My daughter and step-daughter are the same way! Sometimes it is not worth the fight and just let it roll off your back. However, if they become really inappropriate then actions must be taken like privileges taken away.

Debbie - posted on 07/07/2009

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I take her phone away...or whatever else is the MOST precious. That seems to get her attention and then I give her the chance to EARN it back, by the end of the day- she is able to sit down so that we can really discuss how she should talk to me.

Cynthia - posted on 07/07/2009

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When we were going thru this, we has to take privileges away for a while. It was a very difficult time. My daughter is now 23 and things are a whole lot better.



Hang in there.

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